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WayHome -> RE: Fireplay (9/11/2004 6:48:03 AM)
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I'm a fan of fire play. This conversation could get confusing unless you realize there are actually three different techniques being discussed.
The first is cupping. Nowadays most people do cupping using the commercially available pumps but the original way they did it in Chinese medicine (and also in western medicine in the middle ages) was with small glass bowls and fire as thorns described. It's the same effect but a lot more dramatic. It's very cool. Though this technique involves fire, it's not really what most people call "fire play" and really deserves it's own thread.
The second technique is what I think MaitresseEden is showing in her picture (can't tell for sure of course). This is the kind of thing you see circus entertainers doing and involves torches. I've seen only two people do that as play over the years and it was very cool but not something I have experience with. It does require quite a bit of trust since there can be fine lines between sensual, painful, and damaging.
The third technique is by far the most common (what Gloria is talking about, it might be what MaitresseEden is doing also) and involves spreading alcohol on the subs skin directly and then lighting it. This is something I enjoy quite a bit. It is pretty safe when done right. The biggest danger probably comes if you do it on a bed or other form of cloth or have a lot of absorbant material nearby. It is then possible to spill alcohol (possibly without realizing it) and then light it accidentally and it can burn very hot and be hard to put out due to wicking effect. If you are concerned, be sure to place your sub on a vinyl or other non-absorbant surface. That way spills will be obvious even in low light and even if one does light, damage is unlikely.
I have experimented with a lot of techniques over the years as far as lighting. The way I first did it was the way someone taught in a class I took and I got "daubers" like you use to apply dye to leather and can get at Tandy or an art supply store. I soaked these in alcohol and then lit them to make little torches for lighting the sub. I didn't like that. The little torches were hard to extinguish and relight if I wanted to set them down to use both hands on my sub for something like repositioning abound sub. Also, if you hit them too quickly to the skin, they would add to the alcohol already there and thus change the amount of burn I had already precisely decided on.
I tried other sorts of flames to light the alcohol but eventually I decided I liked a plain old lighter best. It seemed a bit clunky and unromantic at first but the control is excellent and I can pick it up or set it down as often as I like and mot break the flow of the scene. Also, since fire play is partly about fear and anticipation, the little "schtik" sound of the lighter quickly developes a pavlovian response and just the simple sound can cause a nice little "startle".
I've noticed different people apply the alcohol differently. Most use 70% isopropyl. Most put it on thick enough that it will burn on it's own a good time if you don't extinguish it (like with the wet cloth Gloria described). I like to spread it really thin using 90% isopropyl. This way it tends to flicker and jump rather than provide a steady burn and it will actually go out on it's own before causing a burn (but not before pain). I use 90% because it's spread thin enough that 70% sometimes won't light or won't stay lit. I use my hand to put it out instead of a cloth. I light with my left hand and wait about a second before sweeping over it with my right which puts it out and gets rid of any residual alcohol giving me a clean surface for the next pass. If she's not already overly sensitive, I might let it go 2-3 seconds but usually my sub is wound so tightly that she "feels" pain long before it's been on long enough to actually hurt.
I didn't do any fire play with my wife for a long time and when we did it again it was like the first time. (I should mention I usually do some flogging before fire play so that nerves are suitably primed). She was in a different headspace and having some "bad fear" (as opposed to the good kind) and couldn't stop squirming. She was not having a good time and, though she generally trusts me implicitly, she was convinced she was getting burned. She was squirming against her bonds and ready to quit. She might have been trying to think of her safeword even[;)] I told her to trust me and that she was not harmed (that always works) but to no avail. The scene was going bad and my impulse was to call it quits. Instead I stopped, took off my pants, got up onto the table next to her kneeling with my crotch about 2 feet from her head, doused my cock and balls liberally and looked her in the eye while I lit them on fire. I calmly waited until they had been burning about twice as long as the longest I had done on her belly, and then doused with my hand. I allowed her to inspect closely for any signs of redness or burns. (I should mention she knows I'm pretty protective of my dangly bits, almost as much as I am of her)
That did the trick. Suddenly she realized that she had built up the fear and pain in her head and that this was an opportunity to overcome, to open, and to go past. The rest of the night went very well for both of us. Later she requested fire play more regularly...
Leto
PS-Someone might not have lied to Gloria. They might have actually believed the thing about the hair not growing back since I have seen that myth written as fact in at least one article. It can be used for hair removal and is about as effective as waxing, though it stinks like hell if you do. It will grow back of course.
PPS-No, I'm not into CBT, don't offer! [:@]
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