Learn2ServeU
Posts: 2
Joined: 12/29/2009
Status: offline
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In defense of blue-ovary-ers ;)
Hello, Newb here, thinking maybe I should make some journal entries. I kind of wish I had been ordered to do so by a Wonderful and Loving Dominant Woman, but maybe I should show some initiative. I saw a term used by a Lovely Domme with whom I had corresponded briefly where she broke down Her disappointments by group. She used the term 'blue-overy-ers" for a certain group of frustrating potential subs who want to 'take it slow' and 'build trust' but who invariably chicken out at the last moment, calling it 'too intense' or whatever. I definitely saw myself in that, and I thought I should respond, respectfully and to a greater understanding between subs and Dommes, of course. And so, kneeling respectfully in deference to Her, allow me to defend the blue-ovary-ers She described. I can only hope She values my contribution.
To begin with, I am neither married nor do I have a list of preconceived fantasies I wish to have 'performed'. But I am new to this, I am nervous, and while I am stubborn and individualistic in my life, this is really growing in me, now that I'm exploring it. And there are preconceptions and naivetes I have that have had to be unlearned. For one thing, I did not realize how many women loved pegging men. I had heard of it, but I had never thought of it as anything but a curiosity. Now that it's been suggested, I do find myself fantasizing about it.... but I am really, really nervous about losing my virginity. ;)
For another, I didn't realize how many men enjoy it too. I would have imagined men who offer their asses would be a rare and precious commodity. How wrong I was! ;) The spam alone for Dommes runs into hundreds of messages, apparently. I can see how, in that context, the idea of waiting for a sub to come around, or taking the time to seduce him, is ridiculous. Again, I am learning. But it's taken a while to even learn what was going on. Now that I do, not sure how to proceed. But I'm glad to have learned.
Now, I apparently need to reposition myself, (no pun intended) but I'm not sure how. I changed my listing to switch, to compensate for my not being full sub (yet ;), but I'm not a Dom really. So, where do I go from here? I'm definitely not ready to be 'outed' as a sub, so no munches or events. And I want trust, it doesn't have to be a relationship but there has to be a vanilla spark (I love to write and talk), and I would like to take it slow. Am I being dishonest? The more I learn the more I want to know, but I am still not sure I'll ever act on it. After all, it takes two compatible people to tango.
Can a male sub reasonably hope to be seduced, and converted, or is that a chauvinistic fantasy, if only because of the sub/Domme ratio? Or does it go against the whole lifestyle? In any case, I thought I'd offer a submissive defense, and a look into what we're thinking, for the use and entertainment of Dommes who may be wondering wtf is going on with these guys. I prefer to think of us as shy, and maybe a bit romantic. Others may see us as manipulative and selfish. Any thoughts?
< Message edited by Learn2ServeU -- 2/23/2010 4:36:00 PM >
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In defense of blue-ovary-ers ;) - 
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