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What is a "Boi"? - 2/24/2010 12:11:33 PM

Steponme73

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The term Boi has been around for a while and I am curious as to the meaning. Is a "Boi" a feminized Boy? Who coined the phrase "Boi"? Is there some basic difference between a "Boi" and a boy?

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RE: What is a "Boi"? - 2/24/2010 12:34:00 PM

aphatjohnson

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Step, a boi from what I understand can have several related meanings. In hetero circles in the lifestyle it usually means a boy who will allow his mistress to take him with a strapon. The fact he is taken by his mistress distinguishes a boi from a boy. It also can mean a boy who is also bi and will participate in bi activities with his mistress. I'm told it also can refer to a submissive bi woman also, but not sure if it carries the same qualifications as in a male.

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RE: What is a "Boi"? - 2/24/2010 12:36:29 PM

mnottertail

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look for posts by JenBoi on this very topic in this very forum. thishereboi prolly also weighed in on that thread for another type of view. I remember it was a big un.

I am to lazy to link it.

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RE: What is a "Boi"? - 2/24/2010 12:59:36 PM

LadyPact

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quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail

look for posts by JenBoi on this very topic in this very forum. thishereboi prolly also weighed in on that thread for another type of view. I remember it was a big un.

I am to lazy to link it.

Tom Waits

He is right and the thread was a very good one. Unfortunately, I can't find it.

The term as associated, is in relation to a lesbian female in submissive context.

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RE: What is a "Boi"? - 2/24/2010 1:08:29 PM

Madame4a

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I probably weighed in on it as well. You can google it too.

quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail

look for posts by JenBoi on this very topic in this very forum. thishereboi prolly also weighed in on that thread for another type of view. I remember it was a big un.

I am to lazy to link it.

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RE: What is a "Boi"? - 2/24/2010 1:16:40 PM

mnottertail

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It was in general.

http://www.collarchat.com/m_2471229/mpage_1/key_lesbian%252Cboi/tm.htm#2471519

and forgive me I just noticed I messed up BoiJen s name.

< Message edited by mnottertail -- 2/24/2010 1:19:03 PM >

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RE: What is a "Boi"? - 2/24/2010 1:20:54 PM

LadyNTrainer

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Steponme73

The term Boi has been around for a while and I am curious as to the meaning. Is a "Boi" a feminized Boy? Who coined the phrase "Boi"? Is there some basic difference between a "Boi" and a boy?

It's a genderbending term, generally speaking, but some heterosexual cisgender submissive males like to use it as well. I've seen it commonly used by partially or wholly male-identified/genderbending female-bodied individuals, usually lesbians, as well as by cisgender males either gay or straight who prefer a "cute" way of identifying that doesn't buy into the traditional sex role stereotypes.

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RE: What is a "Boi"? - 2/24/2010 10:58:33 PM

LPslittleclip

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it is typical a female lesbian that is a submissive/slave or it may denote a "male" oriented lesbian partner. as refered before BoiJen is a subject mater expert on this

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RE: What is a "Boi"? - 2/24/2010 11:16:34 PM

LadyPact

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quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail

It was in general.

http://www.collarchat.com/m_2471229/mpage_1/key_lesbian%252Cboi/tm.htm#2471519

and forgive me I just noticed I messed up BoiJen s name.

Thanks, Ron. I tried finding it Myself, but I was obviously in the wrong section.

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RE: What is a "Boi"? - 2/25/2010 3:58:48 AM

Domin8tingUrDrmz

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My understanding of the origins of boi is that of a lesbian who behaves in boyish ways, or who tends to be the 'male' partner in a lesbian relationship - generally reserved for the submissive role.

I've seen men who adopted this term and thought it was cute because of the song by Avril Lavigne (sp?), SkaterBoi. So, some younger boys think that boi is a cutesy way of saying they are femme boys, or submissive, or a myriad of other implications.

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RE: What is a "Boi"? - 2/25/2010 10:16:38 AM

BoiJen

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Here's a precise one:

http://www.collarchat.com/m_1684371/mpage_1/key_straight%252Cguys%252Cboi/tm.htm#1684371

Straight guys using this term irritates the hell out of me. The reason is because "boi" is a gender identified that's been used for decades by lesbians. In gay male circles the terms has been used about as long as the word "twink" to mean the same thing. The earliest I've been able to track down the gender identifier "boi" in lesbian circles is the early 60's.

Straight guys using "boi" as a self identifier is an advent of the internet and uneducated rappers (Thank you "Big Boi" and outKast). Primarily, a lack of consideration for a word's history and generally accepted meaning and creativity is the driving force behind the het community using the word "boi" to identify men.

I think this can boil down to a political thing...if females, in particular, gay females, were more respected than they are now, the word "boi" would not be used in such a manner as it is currently used by straight men.

Now don't get me wrong. There are many, many straight guys out there who respect and appreciate the word "boi" and how that identifies a lesbian or gay man AND...this word wasn't recognized as being used until a straight guy did it.

Just sayin...

The Wiki "definition" has changed slightly because some idiot plugged the "straight male s-type" thing on it from another website that even said "this ain't the traditional use of this word". Go figure...that person couldn't read either.

If you check out the Wiki page on "boi" please be sure to filter through the citations for the information there. That bit is far more educational on the culture of being a boi and what a boi is than the Wiki page itself.

Finally in Dallas,

boi

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RE: What is a "Boi"? - 2/25/2010 1:35:28 PM

Madame4a

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quote:

ORIGINAL: BoiJen

Straight guys using this term irritates the hell out of me. The reason is because "boi" is a gender identified that's been used for decades by lesbians.

Yep.. me too...

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RE: What is a "Boi"? - 2/25/2010 2:17:18 PM

Wolf2Bear

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The only part I strongly disagree with is in the gay male community and especially in the Bear community is we use the term 'boy" or "cub"to denote a younger bearish type gay male. Among the gay male dominants, a "boy" is indicative to those who is identifying as submissive gay males.

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RE: What is a "Boi"? - 2/25/2010 10:07:24 PM

LadyNTrainer

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quote:

ORIGINAL: BoiJen
Straight guys using this term irritates the hell out of me. The reason is because "boi" is a gender identified that's been used for decades by lesbians. In gay male circles the terms has been used about as long as the word "twink" to mean the same thing. The earliest I've been able to track down the gender identifier "boi" in lesbian circles is the early 60's.

Straight guys using "boi" as a self identifier is an advent of the internet and uneducated rappers (Thank you "Big Boi" and outKast). Primarily, a lack of consideration for a word's history and generally accepted meaning and creativity is the driving force behind the het community using the word "boi" to identify men.

I think this can boil down to a political thing...if females, in particular, gay females, were more respected than they are now, the word "boi" would not be used in such a manner as it is currently used by straight men.

I respect what you're saying, and you very definitely have a point. I do want to state that there is a strong generational movement of transgender, genderqueer and gender transgressive young people who may be gay, lesbian, straight, bi or pansexual. I also respect that culture, and I don't think it's a bad thing at all for the LGBT community.

If a genderqueer person who is physically heterosexual chooses to self-identify as a boi, with knowledge and respect for the history of the term, I don't see anything negative about that. I generally approve of being gender transgressive and shattering social stereotypes of what gender roles "should" be if you are born with a dick or a pussy. I think that overall it could be a very positive thing if the word and the concept found its way into mainstream culture. I agree that it should be done with respect for LGBT community history.

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RE: What is a "Boi"? - 2/26/2010 12:02:09 PM

BoiJen

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Wolf2Bear

The only part I strongly disagree with is in the gay male community and especially in the Bear community is we use the term 'boy" or "cub"to denote a younger bearish type gay male. Among the gay male dominants, a "boy" is indicative to those who is identifying as submissive gay males.

The word "boy" and "boi" are not equal identifiers and do not refer to the same thing. Please, understand that I was not trying to imply that these terms are the same and equate to one another because they do not.

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyNTrainer
I think that overall it could be a very positive thing if the word and the concept found its way into mainstream culture. I agree that it should be done with respect for LGBT community history.

I don't know how to put this in a way that communicates what I want it to. When mainstream culture used the word "dyke" it was negative. The lesbian community had to work to reclaim the word and make it a positive thing. When mainstream culture did the same thing with the word "fag", gay men worked to take away the power of the word.

In the case of the word "boi" mainstream culture using the word takes away the power of the word. When "boi" no longer means a gay, masculine identified, s-type female...what the fuck is the point? I mean really? What's the point in having a gender identifying word if those who don't identify within the subculture start using the word? The meaning gets diluted and lost and then those who truly do identify as "bois" are suddenly unable to use a single word to identify themselves and to set themselves apart from other females in a way that is true to who they are. The whole point in using the word is to help us stand apart from other dykes, from other females, from the male boys....how the hell are we supposed to do that if mainstream culture takes that word from us and changes the meaning of it?

I'm not for it and I won't be. Call it what you will but I'm never going to dress this issue up in pretty politics and say "well, it might be your kink so I'll be ok with it I guess...." Fuck that shit. This is who I am and I'm NOT ok with some dumb ass straight guys using a word that doesn't accurately describe who they are and diminishes the very VALUE of who I am and what I'm about.

And that's why it's not ok.

boi

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RE: What is a "Boi"? - 2/26/2010 12:48:45 PM

playboy22

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A lesbian that likes to play the role of a young male with short cropped hair , small tits and normally wearing a wife beater or similar attire. They like to act like a male till you punch one in the mouth , then they cry like a girl.

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RE: What is a "Boi"? - 2/26/2010 12:52:03 PM

LaTigresse

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quote:

ORIGINAL: playboy22

A lesbian that likes to play the role of a young male with short cropped hair , small tits and normally wearing a wife beater or similar attire. They like to act like a male till you punch one in the mouth , then they cry like a girl.

Well bless your heart...

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RE: What is a "Boi"? - 2/26/2010 12:53:20 PM

Justme696

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quote:

till you punch one in the mouth

nice...... and what reason do you have?

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RE: What is a "Boi"? - 2/26/2010 1:53:07 PM

VaguelyCurious

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quote:

ORIGINAL: BoiJen

I'm not for it and I won't be. Call it what you will but I'm never going to dress this issue up in pretty politics and say "well, it might be your kink so I'll be ok with it I guess...." Fuck that shit. This is who I am and I'm NOT ok with some dumb ass straight guys using a word that doesn't accurately describe who they are and diminishes the very VALUE of who I am and what I'm about.

And that's why it's not ok.

boi

BoiJen,

There was a crappy 'inspirational' quote on the door of the hall at my school which said 'nobody but you has the power to diminish who you are'.

I used to repress the urge to throw up every time I saw it, but it kind of has a point-other people's use of a word does not affect who you are or the value of who you are-you might have to use more/different words to describe yourself, but you are still fundamentally going to be yourself-and the only thing you can base your integrity on is yourself.

Don't let Outkast get you down-the people whose opinions matter will always know what you mean.

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RE: What is a "Boi"? - 2/26/2010 2:07:40 PM

Madame4a

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I'd love you to try that with my boi ...

she won't be crying...

but someone will... luckily she's not the violent type unless you threaten me

< Message edited by Madame4a -- 2/26/2010 2:08:36 PM >

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