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ORIGINAL: LadyNTrainer

With strongly dominant men, their social signals, their body language and even their smell is all wrong for me to be at all turned on or attracted romantically.  If I like them, I tend to see them as friends and brothers, and they register in my mind as "same gender/same orientation", and are basically sexually invisible to me.  I can like and respect them, and I can even find them physically attractive in a still photo.  As soon as they move or talk, I usually read their dominance signals and the immediate response wired into my brain is "nope, wrong gender/orientation". 

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ORIGINAL: Lockit

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ORIGINAL: Jaybeee

It only just hit me after I joined this site, but some of you ladies here just have the sexiest minds...it's just a shame I'd never be a slave, but I'd LOVE the tussle for dominance with one of you, mental or physical. An even bigger shame women are 5% Domme, 5% slave, and 90% vanilla. If only the proportions were 45/45/10, WHAT a beautiful world this would be.

For the first time ever, I both envy and pity a particular group; your slaves.

Well, as this is 'ASK a Mistress', I'll ask; is there any part of you that yearns for a man strong enough to overwhelm you?

Okay, what the hell do you mean five percent domina, five percent submissive and ninety percent vanilla? Where do you get these figures? I would never say I am five percent anything and ninety percent vanilla even though I am not real sadistic which might color someone's perspective.

I don't take offense to much, but I find these figures offensive. Are you putting dominant women in a catagory that you would put a male dominant into? Are dominant men five percent dominant, five percent submissive and ninety percent vanilla?

I am not sure I like your take on who and what we are and NO... I have no desire to be overtaken or to struggle with someone over what I already hold true in my life. NOR do I think of domiant men as better than submissive men in any way. Actually, I like the strong submissive male type and he isn't less than anyone in my eyes. I love his willingness to be all he is and exactly what he is to me and don't need the battle with a man who is always going to be challenging me to go submissive or vanilla, just as you the op seem to be thinking is workable simply because you tend to be thrilled by the domina mind and the challenge. What if you did find someone willing... would you be willing to lose that battle? Because that would be the only way it could or would work with me! lol

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ORIGINAL: Jaybeee
I suppose in my heart of hearts, the apex of my desires is an utterly powerful, but utterly dedicated woman. A slave who could whip me in both an arm-wrestle AND a game of Chess, it would be worth ignoring my dom nature for such a woman, but preferably she still desires nothing more than to serve me. Strong, yet as submissive to ME as she is dominant over others. She "conquers" me through strategised servility, without firing even the opening shot in some infantile gender war, regales me with her superior knowledge of the world over coffee in the kitchen, answers the check-in lady with a "Yes, I packed this bag myself at my master's bidding" (kisses me lovingly, eyes never leaving the check-in lady), at the other end carries ALL our bags off the carousel in St Barts to the taxi, loads the 50Ib suitcase in the back with a frown asking, "You absolutely sure you didn't leave anything off the packing list?"

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Though unless I marry Becca Swanson (be still, my breakfast!), as a bodybuilder myself a woman physically overpowering me is never gonna happen; I had a playfight with a girlfriend who was my height at 170Ibs well-toned, (one of the above-mentioned fitness girls), the 'fight' ended when I threw her lengthwise across the bedroom to land on her bed. And the fun began.

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ORIGINAL: Lockit
You really do want that challenge... the passive aggressive kind I am sure, as you didn't come back with... opps... didn't mean it that way and how you took it was understandable. No, you come back with a mild insult or off focus.

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ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

Nope.  Picture a bunch of men doing guy stuff, or a bunch of women doing female stuff together.  Assuming they're straight, the plumbing will be wrong for anything more.

If I'm with a Domme, we can chat just fine but the "mental plumbing" is wrong.

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ORIGINAL: LadyNTrainer



Also, you may be mistaking strength for dominance.  Some of the strongest men I know are submissive, and it's a beautiful thing.  A warrior knight in honorable service to his lady is an inspiring sight, and one that does interest me sexually and romantically.

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ORIGINAL: LadyNTrainer

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ORIGINAL: Jaybeee
I suppose in my heart of hearts, the apex of my desires is an utterly powerful, but utterly dedicated woman. A slave who could whip me in both an arm-wrestle AND a game of Chess, it would be worth ignoring my dom nature for such a woman, but preferably she still desires nothing more than to serve me. Strong, yet as submissive to ME as she is dominant over others. She "conquers" me through strategised servility, without firing even the opening shot in some infantile gender war, regales me with her superior knowledge of the world over coffee in the kitchen, answers the check-in lady with a "Yes, I packed this bag myself at my master's bidding" (kisses me lovingly, eyes never leaving the check-in lady), at the other end carries ALL our bags off the carousel in St Barts to the taxi, loads the 50Ib suitcase in the back with a frown asking, "You absolutely sure you didn't leave anything off the packing list?"

That too is what dominant women tend to desire in a partner - strength *and* submissiveness. We're not so different after all, neh?

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Though unless I marry Becca Swanson (be still, my breakfast!), as a bodybuilder myself a woman physically overpowering me is never gonna happen; I had a playfight with a girlfriend who was my height at 170Ibs well-toned, (one of the above-mentioned fitness girls), the 'fight' ended when I threw her lengthwise across the bedroom to land on her bed. And the fun began.

While rough body play is fun, you may be confusing the ability to physically overpower with dominance and leadership qualities. Animal wranglers routinely work with animals like horses, elephants, killer whales, lions, bears, etc, that could without question overpower any human being alive. Yet there is also no question who is in charge, or who is dominant, either in the mind of the trainer or in the mind of the animal. Brute force is actually far less relevant to establishing and maintaining dominance, and in fact it tends to not work very well. You certainly can beat and force an animal, or a human. What you get with those tactics is not a willing submissive but a captive. There is a significant risk that such a creature will turn on you in any unguarded moment, and certainly it will escape as soon as it can. Old school animal wranglers from the "chair and whip" school didn't know any better method, and a good number of them ended up maimed or dead. Modern methods are far more reliable, and produce a genuinely willing service animal that strives with all of its might to please the trainer. I'm not impressed by the occasional holdouts who try to tell me that brute force is relevant when we're talking about establishing a sustainable long term dominance relationship. Doesn't matter if the subject is bipedal.

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ORIGINAL: Jaybeee
T'would certainly appear we're not!!

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Oh, those girls and I didn't part ways because I was too rough or not caring enough for their needs.

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I've always loved the idea of humans being merely more intelligent animals, but still subject to the same underlying drives and urges as them. And did anyone ever tell you, there's something VERY arousing about being coached to dominate a woman BY a woman?

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ORIGINAL: LadyNTrainer
No.  Most adults are socially clueful enough to keep that kind of information to themselves during a normal conversation, much as they do not announce at the dinner table that they need to make a tinkle.  It's more information that we really need to know.

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ORIGINAL: Jaybeee

It only just hit me after I joined this site, but some of you ladies here just have the sexiest minds...it's just a shame I'd never be a slave, but I'd LOVE the tussle for dominance with one of you, mental or physical. An even bigger shame women are 5% Domme, 5% slave, and 90% vanilla. If only the proportions were 45/45/10, WHAT a beautiful world this would be.

For the first time ever, I both envy and pity a particular group; your slaves.

Well, as this is 'ASK a Mistress', I'll ask; is there any part of you that yearns for a man strong enough to overwhelm you?

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ORIGINAL: Jaybeee

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ORIGINAL: LadyNTrainer
No.  Most adults are socially clueful enough to keep that kind of information to themselves during a normal conversation, much as they do not announce at the dinner table that they need to make a tinkle.  It's more information that we really need to know.

Boring and needless self-censorship. I've enjoyed many a conversation, in vanilla company no less, where far edgier thoughts were voiced with less advance fanfare.