Married to vanilla?

Married to vanilla? (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion

Message

husband4fun -> Married to vanilla? (3/10/2010 9:52:43 AM)
Does anyone here have any advice on how to encourage a vanilla wife to explore more? I've been with my wife for 10 years now, and she's occasionally humored me in the past by attending bdsm/fetish parties and events, but I could never really get her to participate; lately she won't even go along as a tourist. Needless to say, my own urges are not fading away, and she doesn't seem open to experimenting at home. My wife is extremely attractive, a quality person and a great mom to our two young sons, but this gap between my kinky side and her vanilla nature is causing me a lot of frustration. I'd sincerely like to hear what any of you think might help. S.

divi -> RE: Married to vanilla? (3/10/2010 9:54:47 AM)
Honestly I feel bad for her...My advice is to leave her :)

husband4fun -> RE: Married to vanilla? (3/10/2010 9:56:27 AM)
Ouch. That's pretty harsh, considering we have a very good relationship in most other respects.

divi -> RE: Married to vanilla? (3/10/2010 9:57:41 AM)
Darling harsh is you coming here asking for advice.. I seriously hopes that right now your wife is packing her shit up now

husband4fun -> RE: Married to vanilla? (3/10/2010 9:58:22 AM)
Yup, this is really helpful, as I expected.

divi -> RE: Married to vanilla? (3/10/2010 9:58:43 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: divi Darling harsh is you coming here asking for advice.. I seriously hopes that right now your wife is packing her shit up now. I mean did you know before you got married that you werent compatible

divi -> RE: Married to vanilla? (3/10/2010 9:59:43 AM)
I'm here to help hehe :)

husband4fun -> RE: Married to vanilla? (3/10/2010 10:00:19 AM)
When we first met she expressed an interest in attending events and thought the scene was interesting and cool, but she got turned off by the overly aggressive doms we kept meeting.

Jeffff -> RE: Married to vanilla? (3/10/2010 10:01:22 AM)
Ok how is this. You have a wife and 2 children. Man up and do what is best for the children. I am sure your kids don't really care if daddy is kinky. When you had children your own personal happiness became secondary. You love you wife?... man up dude. Jeff

divi -> RE: Married to vanilla? (3/10/2010 10:02:50 AM)
aww Jeff.. that was so sweet yah man up dude dont be a douche !

Smutmonger -> RE: Married to vanilla? (3/10/2010 10:02:52 AM)
Kink is optional-what else do you do to encourage your wife?

divi -> RE: Married to vanilla? (3/10/2010 10:04:30 AM)
Nothing says love like date night at the dungeon lol

Lockit -> RE: Married to vanilla? (3/10/2010 10:04:37 AM)
Husband4fun, your profile states that you are looking for encounters and that your wife doesn't mind, that she sometimes goes to events with you. Here you are saying your wife has no interest in even being a tourist to these events. This makes me question whether your wife is aware of your seeking encounters. It kind of makes one wonder what your situation really is. Would you be willing to let your wife talk to someone who considered being someone you have encounter's with so that they know for sure she is aware? You cannot force this upon anyone. If they are aware of your desires and have been willing to go to events and still are not interested, I doubt anything you can do can change that.

Lockit -> RE: Married to vanilla? (3/10/2010 10:07:11 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: husband4fun When we first met she expressed an interest in attending events and thought the scene was interesting and cool, but she got turned off by the overly aggressive doms we kept meeting. You don't have to involve events or others. This could simply be between the two of you. If she isn't interested in just being involved with kinky things with you, then she isn't interested. Other dom's have nothing to do with it.

husband4fun -> RE: Married to vanilla? (3/10/2010 10:09:20 AM)
Well, she occasionally still attends the rare event with me if it's thrown by good friends of mine in the scene. I thought I'd checked the "friends only" box under what I'm seeking, but maybe I didn't save the profile correctly. I've fixed that, because I'm not looking to cheat on my wife.

divi -> RE: Married to vanilla? (3/10/2010 10:10:26 AM)
too late lol

husband4fun -> RE: Married to vanilla? (3/10/2010 10:11:09 AM)
Divi, your screen name should probably be "Cruella" instead LOL

divi -> RE: Married to vanilla? (3/10/2010 10:12:40 AM)
yours should be husband4funwhilewifeisathomewiththe2kids or if thats too long it should be.. wifethrewmeoutandimlivingintheminivan adds: they maybe too long

husband4fun -> RE: Married to vanilla? (3/10/2010 10:13:31 AM)
I won't end up living in a van. We still have open communication about this, I'm just seeking advice from people with more experience.

divi -> RE: Married to vanilla? (3/10/2010 10:14:23 AM)
Was a joke :)

Page: [1] 2 3 4 5 next > >>

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

0.03125