LafayetteLady -> RE: Help...........Please (3/15/2010 5:32:44 PM)
|
quote:
ORIGINAL: Nslavu quote:
ORIGINAL: ncbabe quote:
ORIGINAL: Nslavu FFS... if you think you are better for him, then BE better for him. How is stressing him or ultimatums going to be better? Your need to usurp the other woman (who is already gone, so you clearly have an advantage) is extraneous bullshit. Forget about her and BE the better woman for him. edit- I had to add, I disagree with the sit down and talk idea (other than to retract the stupid fucking ultimatum) There is no need to communicate here. There is need to just fucking BE the best one. There are a lot of times when it's best to stfu and be. I agree with the whole 'just be the best' thing but stand by my suggestion of talking. Communication between them seems to be lacking and some clear statements of their respective positions would be a good start. Also, the emphasis is on her listening to him, which she needs to do if she is going to just be the best and quietly support him while he figures his shit out. My point is this (because I am a major supporter of communication) However in this case ...Talking with her about her and the his ex keeps him in the middle of a pussy fight. Unless he feeds off that shit ( I wouldn't) that is just more stress for him. (the same stress as giving an ultimatum) Let me illustrate my point by example- I have two bitches One is nagging the fuck out me and generally making my life miserable (and cuz of kids I am somewhat stuck with her for awhile). The other is sucking my cock, licking my balls, picking up after me and generally making my life rather sweet. Example two- I have two bitches One is nagging the fuck out me and generally making my life miserable (and cuz of kids I am somewhat stuck with her for awhile). The other is nagging the fuck out of me with her bs and whining and ultimatums (which btw is an emotional power play), and making my life miserable -(she is expendable) duh. I am a big fan of communicating, but seriously there are times when communication just irritates an already festering boil so I say stfu and be the best girl. He is with her, he already made the decision. In a "new" as in recent divorce, it takes some time for the parties to come to grips with what has occured. The divorce is typically final, but everything has not truly been "severed." Given the age of the people involved, and the comments about "2 1/2 years," this was a long term marriage, and the current relationship likely started prior to the divorce being over. Comments about how the ex wife is also "vile and vindictive" to the OP indicate that she does believe the OP is responsible for the breakup, whether it is true or not. If the divorce was long since final, then this behavior has long since been going on. The OP can "shut the fuck up" as you suggest, but it is never going to stop. In that case, she had to have seen this happening in the beginning of the relationship and she is the fool who continued to get involved anyway. When a long term marriage breaks up and another relationship starts, there is no "proving you are the best girl (or guy for that matter)." There is the reality of many hurt feelings and anger that is not always resolved by a judge stamping the final divorce decree. There is also the matter that this guy is also obviously coming home bitching up, down and center about his ex calling all the time and pissing him off (it isn't just the ex wife's unresolved anger at play). That affects his CURRENT relationship. My point there? For everyone who says it isn't any of her business, well the minute he starts pissing and moaning about it, the second the ex wife involves her, it BECOMES her business, because it is then affecting HER life. I'm sure it would be nice if all "bitches" would just shut the fuck up and suck dick, but in real life, it just doesn't play out that way. Like it or not, people come with emotions.
|
|
|
|