Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

Creative control......


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Creative control...... Page: [1] 2 3   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
Creative control...... - 3/16/2010 11:05:08 AM   
dove967


Posts: 102
Joined: 10/28/2006
Status: offline
My Daddy is evil(and I love it!).  Last week W/we had a discussion about discipline and the whole idea of  consensual/non-consent.  Now Daddy sees a distinct difference between discipline and punishment.  Discipline is a tool to guide and teach. Punishment is a consequence of disobedience.  I've never recieved a punishment and don't plan on earning one if I can help it.  Daddy has always said not to make the mistake of confusing his compassion with weakness and it's always wise to take Him at His word.  But, back to my point..a couple of days later, Daddy explained to me that He perfers to use positive reinforcement/reward as a form of discipline instead of using the fear of punishment to motivate obediance.  Now, Daddy and I are both smokers and Daddy -the frugal Dom He is-always buys a particular brand of smokes that are less expensive for both of us.  I perfer a pricier brand,but, as long as Daddy supplies the smokes, I try to be respectful and not waste our money by buying my own.  So, one day Daddy comes home with 1 pkge of MY  brand of smokes and one pkge of our regular less expensive brand.  Then he informs me that as a reward for good behavior or a consistant attitude of obedience, He will grant me one of MY brand of smokes at his discretion.   What a clever Daddy!  Needless to say, I am working hard to be a very good girl!  I would love to hear from Doms or subs about some other examples of creative control.
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Creative control...... - 3/16/2010 12:45:04 PM   
MasterBelial


Posts: 19
Joined: 2/15/2010
Status: offline
That is very nice, thank you for sharing!.

He sounds a lot like myself.

Thank you for sharing,
MasterBelial

(in reply to dove967)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Creative control...... - 3/16/2010 3:07:51 PM   
Smutmonger


Posts: 995
Joined: 2/17/2010
Status: offline
Something about a points reward program involving SHOES.

_____________________________

I didn't get into an alternative lifestyle to explore new frontiers in conformity.

(in reply to MasterBelial)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Creative control...... - 3/16/2010 5:07:15 PM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline
If you let them smoke, you aren't being dominant. Smoking is gross, unhealthy, and sick. I have made the handful of women I have ever allowed into my life who did smoke, quit. Nasty gross habit.

(in reply to Smutmonger)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Creative control...... - 3/16/2010 5:17:13 PM   
DomImus


Posts: 2004
Joined: 3/17/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: dove967
Last week W/we had a discussion about discipline and the whole idea of  consensual/non-consent.  Now Daddy sees a distinct difference between discipline and punishment.  Discipline is a tool to guide and teach. Punishment is a consequence of disobedience.


I agree with his sentiment wholeheartedly. I will add that if punishment is not something that the submissive will avoid at all costs (and I mean the actual punishment - forget the underlying fact that she was disobedient and/or displeased her dominant) then it is ineffective. An interesting twist on your cigarette scenario would be to grant you one of your favorite smokes as an incentive/reward and deny you any smokes at all for bad behavior.

I am a bit fuzzy as to how how the consent/non-consent angle factored into discipline versus punishment.




_____________________________

"Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable." Sidney J. harris

(in reply to dove967)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Creative control...... - 3/16/2010 5:32:29 PM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline
If these punishments are so horrible and so to be avoided...why do the ones who use them so often end up single or keep having to use them?

(in reply to DomImus)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Creative control...... - 3/16/2010 5:40:55 PM   
MasterSlaveLA


Posts: 3991
Status: offline
 
Any question must be asked while kneeling... and irrespective of the answer (be it 'yes' or 'no'), the reply is always, "Thank You, Master." 

Enjoy!



_____________________________

It's only kinky the first time!!!

(in reply to dove967)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Creative control...... - 3/16/2010 7:41:38 PM   
alittleevil


Posts: 235
Joined: 10/25/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Smutmonger
Something about a points reward program involving SHOES.


*perk*

:-)



_____________________________

Throw me to the wolves because there's order in the pack (RHCP)

(in reply to Smutmonger)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Creative control...... - 3/16/2010 8:04:18 PM   
Domin8tingUrDrmz


Posts: 1269
Joined: 4/8/2006
From: Portland Metro, Oregon
Status: offline
I enjoy positive reinforcement as well. I have, in the past, granted one day each month, for a submissive type to receive a 'do me' day. They get to pick one of their fantasies that I don't typically play toward, and I will give them that fantasy (provided of course it doesn't go against any of my own personal limits). They were able to receive that day if they avoided discipline for that month.

_____________________________

4 out of 3 people have trouble with fractions.

Ask a Mistress Forum FAQ
Profile Help

(in reply to dove967)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Creative control...... - 3/17/2010 12:23:48 AM   
adx


Posts: 102
Joined: 1/6/2010
Status: offline
Her reward is my continued attention. If shes bad it takes nothing more then letting her know she was what she does to her self is usually punishment enough. However I have been known to burn her she fears this more then anything. having her lay there and be burn and then my refusal to touch her no comfort or support it shatters her.   

(in reply to Domin8tingUrDrmz)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Creative control...... - 3/17/2010 12:27:43 AM   
WyldHrt


Posts: 6412
Joined: 6/5/2008
Status: offline
quote:

If you let them smoke, you aren't being dominant. Smoking is gross, unhealthy, and sick. I have made the handful of women I have ever allowed into my life who did smoke, quit. Nasty gross habit.

Gee, Michael, tell us how you really feel.


_____________________________

"MotherFUCKER!" is NOT a safeword!!"- Steel
"We've had complaints about 'orgy noises'. This is not the neighborhood for that kind of thing"- PVE Cop

Resident "Hypnotic Eyes", "Cleavage" and "Toy Whore"
Subby Mafia, VAA Posse & Team Troll!

(in reply to SimplyMichael)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Creative control...... - 3/17/2010 2:25:56 AM   
ranja


Posts: 2111
Joined: 11/1/2007
Status: offline
If you are a really really good girl and your daddy feels like spoiling you, well,you can both smoke yourselfs inside out that will be sooo nice

you'll make the house stink and cause daddy to be impotent and you to loose some teeth and develop one of these disgusting flemmy coughs and eventually die of lung cancer

... jeezz how very sexy... and i believe you have a child too isn't it?

If a person smokes it shows that they have not much regards for their body or their environment and they certainly have not much self discipline

also the amount of money it costs nowadays is just rediculous... why would you opt to burn your hard earned cash? and if you are on the dole it is even worse... it means that you are wasting other peoples money on this filthy habit.
Christ, why don't you buy some dildos instead?

creative control my ass... stupid control more like

you should both pack it in!!!

< Message edited by ranja -- 3/17/2010 2:30:58 AM >

(in reply to dove967)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Creative control...... - 3/17/2010 6:22:04 AM   
SassySarijane


Posts: 1558
Joined: 12/20/2007
From: KC Area Missouri
Status: offline
Wow, just wow! How did a potentially great discussion get stuck on putting the OP down for being a smoker and airing thoughts on smoking? It was used as an example and other examples were invited to be shared on creative control. I was looking forward to reading a discussion on various ways people have found to exercise creative control. How sad.

_____________________________

Sarah2
Deviant Mind
Wild Side Readers
LPTnB

(in reply to ranja)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Creative control...... - 3/17/2010 7:08:01 AM   
FelineFae


Posts: 7756
Joined: 1/23/2009
From: i do wander everywhere...
Status: offline
For the OP's dynamic, it seems a nice reward system.
It could be applied to other items;

good behavior = generic cerial
superb behavior = name brand cerial

good behavior = generic chocolate
superb behavior = name brand chocolate

good behavior = basic cable
superb behavior = pay-per-view

_____________________________

FelineFae
All right reserved by Chaos
: Disclaimer :
Do not expose FelineFae to direct sunlight.
FelineFae cannot spell in any language.
Granting of Fae-Wishes VOID where prohibitededed.
Individual results may vary.


(in reply to SassySarijane)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Creative control...... - 3/17/2010 8:02:19 AM   
allthatjaz


Posts: 2878
Joined: 8/20/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SassySarijane

Wow, just wow! How did a potentially great discussion get stuck on putting the OP down for being a smoker and airing thoughts on smoking? It was used as an example and other examples were invited to be shared on creative control. I was looking forward to reading a discussion on various ways people have found to exercise creative control. How sad.


Well said, I didn't get what people were trying to say either!!

As far as the ops question, I think positive reinforcement works pretty well.
You can take just about any scenario and work with it. If a dominant shows his/her pleasure or item of reward, then its far more likely that will have very positive effects. It will also make punishment much more meaningful if and when you get it wrong.

_____________________________

S&M (Steve and Maria) persona libre de convencionalismos


Fan of edgeplay.co.uk

(in reply to SassySarijane)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Creative control...... - 3/17/2010 8:06:35 AM   
DarlingSavage


Posts: 2808
Joined: 9/18/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: FelineFae

For the OP's dynamic, it seems a nice reward system.
It could be applied to other items;

good behavior = generic cerial
superb behavior = name brand cerial

good behavior = generic chocolate
superb behavior = name brand chocolate

good behavior = basic cable
superb behavior = pay-per-view


Fuck that! I want shoes!

_____________________________

<-- Easily amused.
<-- Easily impressed.

Strangers have the BEST candy!

Puppy dogs are my favorite people!


(in reply to FelineFae)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Creative control...... - 3/17/2010 10:50:28 AM   
NihilusZero


Posts: 4036
Joined: 9/10/2008
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz

Well said, I didn't get what people were trying to say either!!

Clearly they were trying to cleverly illustrate how even the WIITWD community can be rife with illogical, emotional bias and that we shouldn't kid ourselves otherwise.

They must have just hit the "Send" button mistakenly thinking they were in another thread where people were offering up examples of such prejudice. Surely.


_____________________________

"I know it's all a game
I know they're all insane
I know it's all in vain
I know that I'm to blame."
~Siouxsie & the Banshees


NihilusZero.com

CM Sex God du Jour
CM Hall Monitor

(in reply to allthatjaz)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Creative control...... - 3/17/2010 3:43:27 PM   
ranja


Posts: 2111
Joined: 11/1/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz


quote:

ORIGINAL: SassySarijane

Wow, just wow! How did a potentially great discussion get stuck on putting the OP down for being a smoker and airing thoughts on smoking? It was used as an example and other examples were invited to be shared on creative control. I was looking forward to reading a discussion on various ways people have found to exercise creative control. How sad.


Well said, I didn't get what people were trying to say either!!

As far as the ops question, I think positive reinforcement works pretty well.
You can take just about any scenario and work with it. If a dominant shows his/her pleasure or item of reward, then its far more likely that will have very positive effects. It will also make punishment much more meaningful if and when you get it wrong.


Ok to give things more depth:

the op states: "Then he informs me that as a reward for good behavior or a consistant attitude of obedience, He will grant me one of MY brand of smokes at his discretion.   What a clever Daddy!  Needless to say, I am working hard to be a very good girl!  I would love to hear from Doms or subs about some other examples of creative control."

Smoking is bad for your health, it simply stinks,
i know there still are people who very much like to to it, but even they do not deny it is bad for your health... and if they can still smell anything at all they might even agree that most things smell nicer than cigs.

the op's daddy rewards her by giving her a cancer stick if she is good
she calls this creative control

i call it stupid

he would do better quitting the bad habit to show his sexy self control and next insist that she quits this stupid behaviour too... to reward themselves they can go on lovely trips to restaurants and actually taste the food
and within a few months they will have saved enough money by not smoking to go on a break together, how is that for positive reinforcement

(in reply to allthatjaz)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Creative control...... - 3/17/2010 4:40:22 PM   
SassySarijane


Posts: 1558
Joined: 12/20/2007
From: KC Area Missouri
Status: offline
Smoking is not what the thread was about, it was an example used. What if the reward had been getting to drink his pee and she really liked it? Or getting to cum? Or doing scat play because it was something she enjoyed? Insert example of your choice or preference and go with the question in the thread and we end up with a potentially interesting and informative and even fun discussion rather than starting in on someone because they used smoking as an example.

_____________________________

Sarah2
Deviant Mind
Wild Side Readers
LPTnB

(in reply to ranja)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Creative control...... - 3/17/2010 4:43:45 PM   
SassySarijane


Posts: 1558
Joined: 12/20/2007
From: KC Area Missouri
Status: offline
OP: I really hope others will chime in on your question dealing with creative control and a good and informative discussion on it can happen. I'm disappointed that it was turned into an anti smoking thread rather than what it was intended to be originally. My apologies for stepping into the hijack.

_____________________________

Sarah2
Deviant Mind
Wild Side Readers
LPTnB

(in reply to SassySarijane)
Profile   Post #: 20
Page:   [1] 2 3   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Creative control...... Page: [1] 2 3   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.109