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RE: Tolerance - 4/3/2006 1:44:39 AM

IronBear

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From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
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I tend to avoid using the word judgment. It tends then to become a series of judgmental situations... I prefer to assess situations and people. Based on my assessment I’ll take what I believe to be the be most appropriate course of action for my situation or for me. Not based on other peoples opinions or beliefs or views. In some cases I will, based on what intelligence I have on the matter or subject make a judgment call regarding immediate action.. Ultimately I will not allow my heart to dictate any more than I’ll allowe my head to dictate it is a symbiotic process where all the pros, cons and feelings are weighed up and the result is what I make the judgment call on……

Edited to add: I should add here that like all of us I have my share of likes and dislikes about subjects, beliefs, things and people.. Because I am aware of my likes and dislikes I filter these out from all decisions I make in the main. Sure not all but mostly…. For example there may be a great person who works for the community and has all the attributes I hold high. But on a personal basis I’ll work with him but I want nothing social to do with him.. We would never be friends but I will support his activities and beliefs. I do not see this as a matter of double standards but simply as a matter of maintaining my personal choice who I want to spend time with….

< Message edited by IronBear -- 4/3/2006 1:50:54 AM >

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RE: Tolerance - 4/3/2006 3:12:49 AM

RavenMuse

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MHOO314

<smiles> now that I have your attention--we run from the vanilla world because they don't understand--we seek community for acceptance, a haven, a place to be what W/we are-- and yet, we inflict our vanilla beliefs--not opinions, for that is vastly different--our vanilla "sniffiness" on others--why? why? When we enter this world, most bets are off yet-- W/we attack--I am talking about reasonable alternative lifestyles--there are indeed those styles we all do not tolerate--for even the most extreme of us cannot accept that path---BUT--who can judge?

Gosh a rare thing indeed, a post by you where I disagree with a number of points

Firstly "run from the vanilla world"? LOL I think not. Now I understand those who have work commitments that might be made problematic by it being found out that they where into BDSM or D/s..... Those people have more than valid reason for 'hiding' what they are and what they do to some extent. I am not in such a situation and I don't hide what I am. Parts of the vanilla world may choose to run from me, but I don't run from it

Also I don't come here for acceptance nor validation. The other part of the site is one of the places I am looking for a compatable girl (or eventualy two) and the forums here I enjoy discussing things with like minded people. It is the discussion that I enjoy, the acceptence simply effects the tone of those discussions.

Lastly, whilst I know you well enough to know the over generalisation wasn't ment, but not everyone takes the same attitude. toward other lifestyle choises. Even ones I have little personal regard for, you will oft find comment in my posts about them things to the effect of "I know they work for some folks and good luck to them", either before or after my personal take on the issue..... which of corse being a personal take only applies to me (And in some cases, to any girl under my collar). Same applies when a post is asking a question, all we can answer with is an opinion.... each persons opinion will be diffrent and all equaly valid, it is upto the reader to take what they will from those opinions.

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RE: Tolerance - 4/3/2006 3:32:15 AM

doves

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i don't "run from a vanilla world" ... nor do i hide from it. i came out [so to speak] to those that i felt "needed to know" years ago.

i am who i am.. i don't hide that from anyone, i am just cautious over what i say and to whom.
If i know someone will not be able to accept what and who i am, i am cautious over what i tell them.. Not because i want to hide anything, merely because i respect them and wouldn't want to alarm them.. so i respect others views and opinions.

The only time i judge others, is when i judge just how much information about my life they need to know about.. simple as that.

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RE: Tolerance - 4/3/2006 4:48:19 AM

Cloudz

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MH,

Vereee Interesting. I notice a common theme among the responders. Many took some form of offense or felt the need to address running from the vanilla world. Few addressed the actual theme of prejudice and judgement.

I am quite capable of being judgmental...damn those human genes! I generally catch myself when I am being stereotypical and admit it. Then I try to determine why that bit of ugliness surfaced. Sometimes the judgement is valid and I will defend it, but generally it was a subconscious thing that I had not been aware of.

I agree with Need's post about not tolerating everything (very well said, Need). In my experience those things that cause a knee jerk reaction are fear based. The truly brave will examine and learn from the fear...then we have the common man...who cannot type fast enough to spew toxins on the issue.

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RE: Tolerance - 4/3/2006 5:50:28 AM

MHOO314

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quote:

In my experience those things that cause a knee jerk reaction are fear based. The truly brave will examine and learn from the fear...

Words well worth repeating Cloudz, we tend to knee jerk, it is a human failing--this is a great venue to read and learn and understand another's ideas--

I just saw this line at the bottom of twicehappy's signature--I think it sums up the point:

Infinite Diversity in Infinite Combinations

< Message edited by MHOO314 -- 4/3/2006 5:53:01 AM >

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RE: Tolerance - 4/3/2006 6:10:50 AM

LuckyAlbatross

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Joined: 10/25/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie
Someone commented to me recently that my Master is cruel because sometimes when i am laying at his feet he puts them on my face. What that person didn't know was that the first time this happened, i laid down and placed them on my face myself, because it eased me to be so beneath him that day. He asked me about it later, and i explained why i did it, and now on occasion he does that when he sees my world is spinning too fast. It calms me. To someone else, it looked like he thinks so little of me that he would do something like that. To me, i see he thinks so much of me that he would do something like that.

ROFL thank you, I'm going to tell my local partner that and it will make his day. We took a picnic together yesterday and I spent a good bit of it with my feet pressed against his face, he was in heaven.

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