How often do you transgress your own hard limits in your fantasy life?

How often do you transgress your own hard limits in your fantasy life? (Full Version)

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OrpheusAgonistes -> How often do you transgress your own hard limits in your fantasy life? (4/4/2010 2:41:15 AM)
Not looking for anything gruesome or embarrassing--just wondering if anybody else finds themselves feeling a bit Walter Mittyish in their fantasy lives compared to their willingness to be pushed in real life. In my case, there are several specific activities that partners have suggested and I've been terrified of or revolted by that I often explore in my fantasies. For me, it isn't that the specific activities are any more appealing in theory than in practice, it's the idea of being forced beyond an established limit by some tormentor of brilliance that gets to me. As soon as the fantasy is over, I find these activities absolutely repellent again. I know everybody, by definition, bites off more than they could ever chew in their fantasy life. I'm just curious how many other people very specifically seem to zero in on activities they'd consider limits in real life and imagine themselves being swept well beyond even these last remaining proscriptions.

jbcurious -> RE: How often do you transgress your own hard limits in your fantasy life? (4/4/2010 3:06:44 AM)
Almost all of my fantasies are well outside my limits. I definitly have what I refer to as a dark side and that scares me sometimes, hence one of the questions I asked when I first came to this site "are you ever afraid of losing yourself?"

lally2 -> RE: How often do you transgress your own hard limits in your fantasy life? (4/4/2010 3:08:26 AM)
quite often - but its in a controlled environment (youre head) the sensations, emotions even the responses of youre fantasy Dominant are all in your head funnily enough i was thinking about this cross over thing aswell a couple of days ago. like pain play - i can fantasise about taking the mother of a spanking, paddles, tawse, hairbrush the works and ill get all horny over it and enjoy the O i get from it. in reality the pain would be appalling (for me) and i wouldnt be floating on a fuzzy O either. the O is like pavlovs conditioning in a way. years of fantasising about being spanked hard and having a great orgasm from my fantasy has tripped that correllation between the fantasy and pleasure. i used to be scared that the reality would kill the fantasy, but it hasnt - i can still get off on the fantasy while knowing full well the reality is far far different. i got an email today inviting me to an abduction, interrogation party - not my kinda thing really, too many variables too many unknown componenets and i wouldnt know the players either and im not into mindfucks id go at them with teeth and claws if they pushed me hard enough and god knows where that would end - but i could fantasise about that quite happily and the fantasy might even almost persuade me to go for it. hmmm, who knows.

Level -> RE: How often do you transgress your own hard limits in your fantasy life? (4/4/2010 3:34:22 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: jbcurious Almost all of my fantasies are well outside my limits. I definitly have what I refer to as a dark side and that scares me sometimes, hence one of the questions I asked when I first came to this site "are you ever afraid of losing yourself?" But would it really be "losing yourself"..... or finding your true self?

Justme696 -> RE: How often do you transgress your own hard limits in your fantasy life? (4/4/2010 3:37:21 AM)
quote: How often do you transgress your own hard limits in your fantasy life? As A Dom...as soon as they come in to my fantasy...they get out of my hard limits. Just hoping the partner thinks the same...ofcourse...

jbcurious -> RE: How often do you transgress your own hard limits in your fantasy life? (4/4/2010 3:51:55 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: i got an email today inviting me to an abduction, interrogation party - not my kinda thing really, too many variables too many unknown componenets and i wouldnt know the players either and im not into mindfucks id go at them with teeth and claws if they pushed me hard enough and god knows where that would end - but i could fantasise about that quite happily and the fantasy might even almost persuade me to go for it. hmmm, who knows. I had the shock of seeing one of my fantasies written on a post by one of the Doms here on CM. It was my second day here and I was reading through the posts and he was describing what he could do to a sub in a restaurant...he hit on every aspect of my fantasy. It was strange because I have no idea where this fantasy came from...it was just something that had grown and developed over time. I thought it was my own secret fantasy and I was blown away to see it in print. Needless to say... I'll avoid that Dom... [:D]

lally2 -> RE: How often do you transgress your own hard limits in your fantasy life? (4/4/2010 3:56:30 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: jbcurious quote: ORIGINAL: i got an email today inviting me to an abduction, interrogation party - not my kinda thing really, too many variables too many unknown componenets and i wouldnt know the players either and im not into mindfucks id go at them with teeth and claws if they pushed me hard enough and god knows where that would end - but i could fantasise about that quite happily and the fantasy might even almost persuade me to go for it. hmmm, who knows. I had the shock of seeing one of my fantasies written on a post by one of the Doms here on CM. It was my second day here and I was reading through the posts and he was describing what he could do to a sub in a restaurant...he hit on every aspect of my fantasy. It was strange because I have no idea where this fantasy came from...it was just something that had grown and developed over time. I thought it was my own secret fantasy and I was blown away to see it in print. Needless to say... I'll avoid that Dom... [:D] everything gets plaguerized, even our fantasies - is nothing sacred!! edited because im a moron. edited again as a second thought. these people do come through as genuine, so if anyone is interested in abduction/interrogation and can make kent during june/july let me know on the other side and ill pass youre name over to them. im just not into role play, my brain gets in the way and tells me it isnt real and the whole thing gets phucked up.

jbcurious -> RE: How often do you transgress your own hard limits in your fantasy life? (4/4/2010 4:20:23 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Level But would it really be "losing yourself"..... or finding your true self? Level... I realize it is a side I have...but I don't want to become it. During my travels I attended a voodoo ritual and lost myself for several hours...I really don't need to open up that side of myself on a regular basis [:D]

jbcurious -> RE: How often do you transgress your own hard limits in your fantasy life? (4/4/2010 4:25:15 AM)
Try some method acting classes... you learn how to over come the brain engagement and it becomes very real.

lally2 -> RE: How often do you transgress your own hard limits in your fantasy life? (4/4/2010 4:27:55 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: jbcurious Try some method acting classes... you learn how to over come the brain engagement and it becomes very real. oooh - id love to do that - thanks - great idea!!

jbcurious -> RE: How often do you transgress your own hard limits in your fantasy life? (4/4/2010 4:41:10 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: lally2 oooh - id love to do that - thanks - great idea!! [:D] There are so few threads that I can post anything other then questions...I'm glad when I can actually contribute something usefull!

UniqueRaven -> RE: How often do you transgress your own hard limits in your fantasy life? (4/4/2010 6:45:01 AM)
Honestly the farther i go as a slave, the more my fantasies actually align with what i might actually do "in real life." i used to have pretty out-there fantasies. i think the reason i enjoyed them was because of the stigma i placed on them somehow - bad, dark, evil, naughty, dangerous, whatever. But there came a point when i embraced my fantasies and said they are what they are - no fantasy is to be judged any better or worse than any other. And slowly i began to fantasize about things that most likely will be come "real" much more. It's interesting to me. i do still have some out-there things - i really enjoy graphic BDSM graphic novellas, and that sort of thing. i find that sort of art very arousing, and not at all real. Fantasies are a great place to explore something you might do in real life. Just as one person posted on here - if you tell your Dom about them, be ready for them to be used on you in some fashion, hee hee! But that's half the fun, trusting him to possibly play something out in a way that works for you, right? [:)]

OttersSwim -> RE: How often do you transgress your own hard limits in your fantasy life? (4/4/2010 7:15:54 AM)
As Robert Browning once said: "Man's fantasies must exceed his grasp, else what's a heaven for?" No wait... [;)]

kiwisub12 -> RE: How often do you transgress your own hard limits in your fantasy life? (4/4/2010 7:24:20 AM)
Does alien abduction count? Especially the medical experiments? hehehe

beej -> RE: How often do you transgress your own hard limits in your fantasy life? (4/4/2010 7:49:30 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: OrpheusAgonistes For me, it isn't that the specific activities are any more appealing in theory than in practice, it's the idea of being forced beyond an established limit by some tormentor of brilliance that gets to me. As soon as the fantasy is over, I find these activities absolutely repellent again. I know everybody, by definition, bites off more than they could ever chew in their fantasy life. I'm just curious how many other people very specifically seem to zero in on activities they'd consider limits in real life and imagine themselves being swept well beyond even these last remaining proscriptions. i specifically fantasize about my hard limits, but i do so with the intention of letting the air out of the tires. usually if i craft a very elaborate and detailed fantasy and go over it in slow motion a few times, i can find the moment that theoretically makes me flinch, and then i can consider why that is. so far, this kind of fantasizing has not changed how i react to having my limits pushed in practice, but it has improved my willingness to say yes to the unexpected and to having those limits pushed. dunno but once i've imagined in detail the worst that will most likely happen, fear becomes intrigue. i stop getting stuck on "that'll hurt like hell/scare me to death/make me bleed" and start thinking, "how much will it hurt? will i have to grit my teeth? will i start to shake? will i have to hum 'Zipadeedoodah' to get through it?" entertaining the fantasy reminds me that in reality, i'll be with someone caring and skilled that i trust, and thus there is a therapeutic and beneficial effect on the boundaries of my consent. in that way, i advanced fairly quickly with my ex-Dom, and i'm glad i did. i don't recommend "quick" for everybody, but as i'm hardheaded in general, fantasy as therapy helped me to break through to basics of trust.

sexyred1 -> RE: How often do you transgress your own hard limits in your fantasy life? (4/4/2010 7:54:23 AM)
Of course, pretty much all of my fantasies go beyond what I would actually do in real life. I have, of course, tried elements of the fantasy with one person, but the extremes of the fantasy and total intensity of it are the reasons they exist in the first place.

SimplyMichael -> RE: How often do you transgress your own hard limits in your fantasy life? (4/4/2010 8:35:51 AM)
Oh hell yeah! I do a lot of stuff that peoplehere have as hard limits but I still have hard limits. BSB and I pushed past limits we both had that surprised us both but there were also places we didn't go but were hot wank material.

Wheldrake -> RE: How often do you transgress your own hard limits in your fantasy life? (4/4/2010 3:09:22 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: OrpheusAgonistes I know everybody, by definition, bites off more than they could ever chew in their fantasy life. I'm just curious how many other people very specifically seem to zero in on activities they'd consider limits in real life and imagine themselves being swept well beyond even these last remaining proscriptions. Perhaps I'm a bit unusual in that my fantasies tend to be more about situations than activities. Some of the situations are ones that I would be unlikely to consent to in reality - for example, being sold into legally binding slavery or incarcerated in some kind of Stalinist labour camp. But within those situations, I don't usually imagine specific torments or deprivations that would go beyond my real-life hard limits, although I suppose it helps that those limits are pretty broad.

nephandi -> RE: How often do you transgress your own hard limits in your fantasy life? (4/5/2010 1:58:26 AM)
Greetings I very seldom if ever transgress my hard limits in my fantasies as I have very few limits and those limits I do have is not something I would find it hot to cross. Sure I go further in my fantasies than I would want to do in real life, and include quite a few things I think it would be physically impossible to do in real life or things I am definitely not ready for. But my hard limits no, I would find no desire in crossing them, soft limits however, yes those I cross often in my fantasies. I wish you well

slavecube -> RE: How often do you transgress your own hard limits in your fantasy life? (4/7/2010 2:36:22 AM)
What fantasy of yours did the Dom post about?

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