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hopelesslyInvo -> RE: A question for male slaves/subs (though all can join in) (7/3/2010 8:10:40 PM)
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absolutely.
now your viewpoints and semantics could get confusing or cause more trouble; in example blurting out publicly that you're a slave. some people would look at you like you're crazy, i'd probably just ask why you use the word slave when there is no 'owner'.
ideally, i'd communicate with your audience based on their vocabulary. if you're wanting to admit how you feel to people in your life try using words that will make sense to them. saying "i'm a slave and seek to serve my mistress in whatever way she desires" sounds to us fairly normal, but to the randoms it sounds like jargon. unlike normal jargon though they understand the words close enough to make wrong assumptions as to what you mean.
tell them "when i find someone important, i start caring so much that i lose myself a bit and get wrapped up doing things to make sure they're as happy as i can make them. it's like an obsession, where i find myself to a point of just waiting for the next thing they ask, curious of what or when it will be. i don't know why; it's like playing fetch with a dog, i don't know why i enjoy bringing the ball back every time she throws it, but it suits me ya know?", and they'll probably just nudge you with their elbow and say "yeah, i get what you're trying to say".
take a different approach and say "i like women that are just a little bit crazy, a little bit controlling, with maybe a bit too much aggression. you find someone with a fire in the like that and you just want to let them take the wheel while you sit back and enjoy the ride. it's a blast just getting into trouble or doing something stupid with her, you don't find women like that too often.", and they'll understand in their own way. you might even inspire jealousy or a new-found interest in them.
these are my words of course, i don't know what you would want to say, so i of course can't tell you how to say it, but i think you can get the point.
with a lot of vanillas you could just get away with saying "i like rough sex, women who will fight you a bit, maybe even tie you up on occasion and like to take the lead" and you'll get patted on the back for it with a lot of guys.
society really doesn't matter much though; we do what we must, though i'd argue that more and more society becomes more accepting if not appreciative for such traits in men. hell, just the words "team edward" are enough to prove my point, but looking back through recent decades you'll easily notice a change both appearance and personality of the men society were fond of.
i'm afraid kink is another matter entirely, both in telling people about it and in acceptance. while i understand the need to tell people a bit about what makes you tick, i would question why anyone vanilla needs to be aware of your kinks and fetishes.
if your fetishes drive your relationship though, i can't see why you bother trying to meet women not in the scene, look for the ones who are.
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being submissive or being a submissive doesn't really "make" you anything that wasn't already obvious though. society has its surface level views, but individuals differ in opinion and ultimately your actions are going to decide whether you're less of a man or not. people are often surprised by the change of outcome when simply changing the scenario, how likely are you to react when someone make a shitty comment about you as compared to someone you care about? we may seem weak depending what they know and what their perception is, but some of us get our strength elsewhere or simply are strong in different ways.
in the end, do you really care if people you don't and won't ever interact with or even society as a whole thinks you're less of a man?
reverse psychology dictates that i ask if a real man would be affected by such petty things, or if it takes a stronger man to yield; i'm sure you get the point.
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