RE: How do you feel about wearing your collar in public?

RE: How do you feel about wearing your collar in public? (Full Version)

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domiguy -> RE: How do you feel about wearing your collar in public? (4/15/2010 3:08:45 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: brainiacsub I found it! Here it is: http://www.collarchat.com/fb.asp?m=1557885 These were the good old days. Even that thread deteriorated in to some rampant debate on discrimination against kinksters or some shit. Met you, AquaticSub, Marie2, SubRob, Domi and a few others. I miss the old days.... Oh, for the good ol' days.... Subrob and I shared the same views. Merc unfortunately was still merc. Brainy and I were the same poster then as we are today. It was a time of deep unrest and discontent for most CM'ers. Mod 11 ran rampant and unchecked. I had been placed on moderation. Twas darkest era that CM had ever experienced. edited to add...collars look pretty fucking tacky.

brainiacsub -> RE: How do you feel about wearing your collar in public? (4/15/2010 3:09:52 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DesFIP quote: ORIGINAL: CollaredCabbit I don't get why wearing a leash out in public is 'forcing your kink on people', any more than wearing stockings out is. We aren't breaking any indecency laws, and kids wouldn't understand it anymore than they would understand why some goths wear dog collars in their fashions. I would see why if you were walking around town wearing nothing but a collar, but then the nudity would be the issue, not the collar/leash. People are going to judge regardless, if no laws are being broken, there is no issue. People shouldn't expect the world to babysit their children either. Just saying. You're 19. Anything you wear could come from Hot Topic and be worn by goth girls. Nobody notices weird fashions worn on teens. But at 55? Big difference, Very noticeable and will attract undesirable attention. And honestly, I'm past the stage of wanting to shock people just cause. I'd rather they pay attention to what I say instead of what I wear. And you only get to pick one. Of course, at 19 YMMV. She is also too young to remember women's sufferage and what it means to be treated as inferior in a patriarcal society. The only inequality I'll accept is between me and my man. Having women dressed and led like dogs in public is a step backward for all of us, not a step forward for her personal freedom.

Missokyst -> RE: How do you feel about wearing your collar in public? (4/15/2010 3:17:43 PM)
I am going to go with this answer. No man I have ever dated or been committed to would need me to be a canvas to prove his control to the general public. Any collar I have worn was for play only. I plan on keeping it that way by choosing guys who don't need that validation to know I am theirs. quote: ORIGINAL: domiguy edited to add...collars look pretty fucking tacky.

RCdc -> RE: How do you feel about wearing your collar in public? (4/15/2010 3:18:31 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: brainiacsub She is also too young to remember women's sufferage and what it means to be treated as inferior in a patriarcal society. The only inequality I'll accept is between me and my man. Having women dressed and led like dogs in public is a step backward for all of us, not a step forward for her personal freedom. This is were we part company brainiac. It's only sufferage if the act is involuntary. Otherwise it's empowering for the person and those that adhere to such ideas. Feminism in that form is nothing more than another name for oppression. So would it be differnet if the slave/sub in question was a male wearing it? Besides, the OP wasn't about collars and being lead about on leashes. It was about wearing a collar, regardless of gender, nothing more than that. Otherwise we are going into the realms of how submission and domination is oppression and sufferage as well. the.dark.

brainiacsub -> RE: How do you feel about wearing your collar in public? (4/15/2010 3:36:07 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: RCdc quote: ORIGINAL: brainiacsub I agree that distinctions should be made between what is legal and what is just in bad taste. Every person reading these forums I bet could think of at least one thing that is not illegal but would be considered distasteful or tacky. Darcy's spandex days would qualify. This is RC Who holds my hands up to tacky spandex. It seemed such a good idea at the time, but then, I was a wannabeteenagerockstar. RC, if the spandex fits...well, you know....

RCdc -> RE: How do you feel about wearing your collar in public? (4/15/2010 3:44:05 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: brainiacsub quote: ORIGINAL: RCdc quote: ORIGINAL: brainiacsub I agree that distinctions should be made between what is legal and what is just in bad taste. Every person reading these forums I bet could think of at least one thing that is not illegal but would be considered distasteful or tacky. Darcy's spandex days would qualify. This is RC Who holds my hands up to tacky spandex. It seemed such a good idea at the time, but then, I was a wannabeteenagerockstar. RC, if the spandex fits...well, you know.... This is RC I am not even going to wonder if it fits anymore, let alone attempt it.[X(]

brainiacsub -> RE: How do you feel about wearing your collar in public? (4/15/2010 3:54:51 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: RCdc quote: ORIGINAL: brainiacsub She is also too young to remember women's sufferage and what it means to be treated as inferior in a patriarcal society. The only inequality I'll accept is between me and my man. Having women dressed and led like dogs in public is a step backward for all of us, not a step forward for her personal freedom. This is were we part company brainiac. It's only sufferage if the act is involuntary. Otherwise it's empowering for the person and those that adhere to such ideas. Feminism in that form is nothing more than another name for oppression. So would it be differnet if the slave/sub in question was a male wearing it? Besides, the OP wasn't about collars and being lead about on leashes. It was about wearing a collar, regardless of gender, nothing more than that. Otherwise we are going into the realms of how submission and domination is oppression and sufferage as well. the.dark. I think you misunderstood me. I don't think anything we do is oppressive as long as it's consensual. I was only commenting about the public's perception and whether someone ignorant of this lifestyle (which is almost everyone) would understand the symbolism of the collar and leash as one of empowerment vs. sufferage. The context is also important here. If a woman were leading a man by a leash, that would be poetic justice. If a man were leading another man it would be comic relief. If a white person of any gender were leading a black person of any gender, we'd have race riots in the street. None of this has anything to do with D/s in the eyes of the public. Is a joke funny if no one gets it? The OP only mentioned collars, but I responded to a post that mentioned being led by a collar and leash in public.

Wolf2Bear -> RE: How do you feel about wearing your collar in public? (4/15/2010 4:10:31 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: brainiacsub FR to Wolf and Cabbitt: Cultural norms are important and necessary. Any civilized society can dictate what, as a group, the majority feels is acceptable. All societies do this. If you went to France or China, you would have to live by their rules and customs. This is not an issue of freedom, this is an issue of violating established rules that society has deemed acceptable. Wearing a collar and leash in public represents subjugation of women in the eyes of many. It is not the same thing as wearing a wedding ring. Wolf, I can't believe you said that. I am not making a moral statement of its rightness or wrongness. I personally don't care that much about this issue. But if you want to wear your fetish gear in public and not be arrested or ridiculed, then become an activist and educate the public as to the importance of the symbolism of the leash and collar. Changing cultural norms is a slow process of changing hearts and minds. You can't butt fuck the public and expect to not get some shit on you. Yet we also have to realize and understand that cultural norms are in constant change and evolution. Look at the morms 40-45 years ago and it was a moral shame for a woman andf a man to live common law and heaven forbid if they had offspring. Then look at the cultural changes in the sixties with the hippies and free love. That cultural segment was highly looked down upon and scorned. Then jump ahead to the 90's and the 21st century and see all the younger generation wearing their jeans half way down to their knees. What the most aggravating and frustrating is seeing how we as a loose knit mass of kinksters that constantly demand and vehemently bitch and complain about wanting others to understand why we do what we do yet we act like a pack of bloody thirsty savages and lambaste the ones who are damn Proud to wear our owner's collar in private and in public.

brainiacsub -> RE: How do you feel about wearing your collar in public? (4/15/2010 4:22:56 PM)
I agree...norms are a moving target. At one point in this country's history it was acceptable to own a black person but that didn't make it right. Changing that took alot of hard work and sacrifice. The kink community seems to believe that everyone should just accept what we do, no questions asked. It doesn't work that way. And I am not aware of any lambasting going on.

domiguy -> RE: How do you feel about wearing your collar in public? (4/15/2010 4:25:18 PM)
I just think they look stupid. Has nothing to do with anything else. Oh yeah, I still loathe goths and vampires.

brainiacsub -> RE: How do you feel about wearing your collar in public? (4/15/2010 4:28:50 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: domiguy I just think they look stupid. Has nothing to do with anything else. Oh yeah, I still loathe goths and vampires. I quess taking the dog dish to Olive Garden is out too, huh?

GoddessImaginos -> RE: How do you feel about wearing your collar in public? (4/15/2010 4:29:09 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: domiguy Oh yeah, I still loathe goths and vampires. That's ok, domi. They probably loathe you, too. Except for the vamps, who might be willing to find out whether you stay crispy in milk or not. Just a thought..

CollaredCabbit -> RE: How do you feel about wearing your collar in public? (4/15/2010 4:32:07 PM)
No ones asking them to accept us. Just stating that in my opinion, what other people care about is not of my concern, and I'm not about to cater to everyone elses idea of fashion.

Jeffff -> RE: How do you feel about wearing your collar in public? (4/15/2010 4:38:21 PM)
I would bang a goth, but not a vampire. I sometimes fall asleep after a hearty banging. A vampire would likely turn me into one of the undead. That could seriously fuck up my weekend plans

domiguy -> RE: How do you feel about wearing your collar in public? (4/15/2010 4:46:40 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: GoddessImaginos quote: ORIGINAL: domiguy Oh yeah, I still loathe goths and vampires. That's ok, domi. They probably loathe you, too. Except for the vamps, who might be willing to find out whether you stay crispy in milk or not. Just a thought.. Why would you say that? What have you heard? Are the goths plotting something? Have the goths ever done anything? They are usually far too busy looking all menacing and shit. They show their disdain for society by conforming to the attire worn by all of the other folks that are showing their disdain for society. I want to be a goth. Only trepidation I have is that I spend a great deal of time outdoors during the Summer, could I be the first tan goth? Goth life sure is confusing. I need a new Misfits tee.

kittinSol -> RE: How do you feel about wearing your collar in public? (4/15/2010 4:53:20 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Wolf2Bear What the most aggravating and frustrating is seeing how we as a loose knit mass of kinksters that constantly demand and vehemently bitch and complain about wanting others to understand why we do what we do yet we act like a pack of bloody thirsty savages and lambaste the ones who are damn Proud to wear our owner's collar in private and in public. An ever so slight exaggeration, don't you think? I mean, Merc was his usual rude and uncouth self, and domiguy, well, he's always a bit brutal, but savages? Collars may be becoming a bit old-fashioned and twee, but hypberbole isn't dead, that's for sure :-) .

DarlingSavage -> RE: How do you feel about wearing your collar in public? (4/15/2010 5:30:47 PM)
Vampires are every bit as real as furries. YAY! [sm=cute.gif][sm=cheering.gif][sm=cute.gif]

Wolf2Bear -> RE: How do you feel about wearing your collar in public? (4/15/2010 6:54:35 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: kittinSol quote: ORIGINAL: Wolf2Bear What the most aggravating and frustrating is seeing how we as a loose knit mass of kinksters that constantly demand and vehemently bitch and complain about wanting others to understand why we do what we do yet we act like a pack of bloody thirsty savages and lambaste the ones who are damn Proud to wear our owner's collar in private and in public. An ever so slight exaggeration, don't you think? I mean, Merc was his usual rude and uncouth self, and domiguy, well, he's always a bit brutal, but savages? Collars may be becoming a bit old-fashioned and twee, but hypberbole isn't dead, that's for sure :-) . No more than the slight exaggerations of others. Mind you, what you interpret as rudeness from Merc is more than likely Merc simply stating his opinion with sugar coating his response. What you read as uncouthness and rudeness I saw plain truth from his POV and is quite refreshing.

Toppingfrmbottom -> RE: How do you feel about wearing your collar in public? (4/15/2010 7:04:50 PM)
I have never known any one to be arrested simply for wearing a collar out in public. Maybe they'd get more flack over a leash depending on where they are, but I doubt it'd come to being arrested. quote: ORIGINAL: brainiacsub FR to Wolf and Cabbitt: But if you want to wear your fetish gear in public and not be arrested or ridiculed, then become an activist and educate the public as to the importance of the symbolism of the leash and collar. Changing cultural norms is a slow process of changing hearts and minds. You can't butt fuck the public and expect to not get some shit on you.

brainiacsub -> RE: How do you feel about wearing your collar in public? (4/15/2010 7:10:06 PM)
I was only suggesting that getting arrested could be a possibility for wearing fetish garb in public, especially if it violated decency laws. I didn't mean to say that wearing a leash would get one arrested.

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