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RE: What is the Deal with all the Pro's - 4/6/2006 10:02:48 AM   
LadyLivia


Posts: 2
Joined: 3/24/2006
Status: offline 		Hmmm.  What is this persistent and pervasive need people have to control others?  A seductive poison that would appear irresistable to most, regardless of the social community.  Why does this myth of mind-reading...knowing every thought and inner awareness of individuals who are not ourselves...continue to tempt our egos to speak about and judge things that we cannot even know?  One of the benefits of this "lifestyle" that I actually treasure is the enhancement of the personal freedom I want and need to live my life being genuinely who and what I am in every aspect of my being.  I'm entirely too preoccupied with my endeavors to live my life as fully as possible, without unnecessary waste and regrets, to spend time trying to custom tailor the world to my individual perspective.  This preoccupation of mine is doing very well as challenge enough.  There will always be offense, hurt, and intolerance because we will never all be the same person.  Time is fleeting.  Just live.
 
Our wish for the best to all...

(in reply to LadyMorgynn)
Profile   Post #: 121
RE: What is the Deal with all the Pro's - 4/6/2006 10:05:11 AM   
LadyLivia


Posts: 2
Joined: 3/24/2006
Status: offline 		I beg your pardon <smile>....the post just prior to this was in response to the thread in general, not specifically to Lady Morgynn.
 
 
~Lady Livia

(in reply to LadyLivia)
Profile   Post #: 122
RE: What is the Deal with all the Pro's - 4/6/2006 10:23:49 AM   
Arpig


Posts: 9930
Joined: 1/3/2006
From: Increasingly further from reality
Status: offline 		No it isn't all in the perspective, you are not paid to do those things for the sexual gratification of your clients.......

I really don't understand why some people find the concept so hard to grasp, it is really very simple.

_____________________________

Big man! Pig Man!
Ha Ha...Charade you are!

Why do they leave out the letter b on "Garage Sale" signs?

CM's #1 All-Time Also-Ran


(in reply to valeca)
Profile   Post #: 123
RE: What is the Deal with all the Pro's - 4/6/2006 10:31:31 AM   
LadyMorgynn


Posts: 800
Joined: 11/25/2005
From: N. Carolina
Status: offline 		I agree, I was going to respond to this gal but you beat me too it!  All it does is add confusion when people take the situation under discussion completely and irrationally out of context.  I mean, hey! you and I are on polar opposites opinion-wise on this subject, but at least we can keep on topic without bringing in totally unrelated situations and try to make them sound related.  sheesh. 


quote:

ORIGINAL: Arpig

No it isn't all in the perspective, you are not paid to do those things for the sexual gratification of your clients.......

I really don't understand why some people find the concept so hard to grasp, it is really very simple.


_____________________________

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Lady Morgynn
www.farhorizons.net/LadyMorgynn

(in reply to Arpig)
Profile   Post #: 124
RE: What is the Deal with all the Pro's - 4/6/2006 10:38:02 AM   
Arpig


Posts: 9930
Joined: 1/3/2006
From: Increasingly further from reality
Status: offline 		Actually i find very little to really argue with in your posts. And you are right, it is really pretty dumb to try to equate it to nursing just because some of the duties can be described in a similar manner.


_____________________________

Big man! Pig Man!
Ha Ha...Charade you are!

Why do they leave out the letter b on "Garage Sale" signs?

CM's #1 All-Time Also-Ran


(in reply to LadyMorgynn)
Profile   Post #: 125
RE: What is the Deal with all the Pro's - 4/6/2006 10:38:13 AM   
crouchingtigress


Posts: 4387
Joined: 3/19/2006
From: Maui
Status: offline 		"did notice, however, that she listed "financial domination" in her profile, despite her stating here that she was not into financial slavery.  I wonder how she splits that hair?"....*winks at Morganna*....credit cards have very sharp edges.....
 
 
OK so I was a no sex prodomme, in my 20's and a true blue dyed in the wool prostitute in my teens. I think there is a misunderstanding about prostitutes as unloving and uncaring, I was neither,...so my point in all of this is there are different levels of prostitution as there are different levels of Professional Domination.
 
I have always known I was a sex worker, in both professions, because like with dancing you are making your living on selling a sexual fulfillment service.
 
I dont judge who does what and where ect, as I have said before, Power  Exchange is purely up to the individuals to define what is power is to them,  and what they are willing to exchange for it which means like it or not professional dommination will alaways havea place in the bdsm lifestyle.
 
But i do empathize with the OP and Morgana and Arpig and all the others in that there are so many professionals here that it is beginning to feel like a Pro-Domme network and not a leather family community.
 
I think that the reason could be linked to the fact that Mod One is still looking for moderators to help with he managing of this board, I am guessing he is over worked and and cant keep up with it all.
 
My solution would be to get active if you can, offer to help moderate forum posts and profile submissions, and you will have a stronger voice in the direction of site in the long run.
 
 

_____________________________


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This is him

"Its none of my buisness what other people think of me."




(in reply to valeca)
Profile   Post #: 126
RE: What is the Deal with all the Pro's - 4/6/2006 10:38:47 AM   
LadySeraphina


Posts: 931
Joined: 3/28/2006
From: Calgary, Canada
Status: offline 		I haven't read the whole thread, but I jumped in and viewed a bit, and I have to say that I am most certainly not about greed.  I have a wonderful man at home, I love him very much, and overall we live the D/s lifestyle.  He will soon be staying at home and doing the cooking, cleaning, and seeing to my needs.  In no way is that commercial, I love him and he loves me, and he enjoys pleasing me.  Which is as it should be.

My clients come to me to learn, to have fun, to play.  I help them relieve stress and feel good about their kinks.  For whatever reason they are not comfortable being in the Scene.  In some cases, yes, they have a mate who won't play, but in many they are high-profile and can't risk the exposure (or so they feel, but who am I to judge them?) or are afraid to face the Scene unprepared.  I have several clients who want to be in the Scene, but haven't been successful in fulfilling their needs yet, so they play with me in the mean time, with the benefit that receiving training increases their 'value' as submissives in the Scene.  (Their opinion, not mine.  I simply feel good about helping people, it's not up to me to make those judgements.)

Just my two cents, I hope it doesn't start a flame war.

Lady S

(in reply to MsSophie)
Profile   Post #: 127
RE: What is the Deal with all the Pro's - 4/6/2006 10:53:19 AM   
LadyMorgynn


Posts: 800
Joined: 11/25/2005
From: N. Carolina
Status: offline 		Actually, I don't know that the site *is* overrun with pro Domme's looking for clients.  As a Domme looking for a male sub, I tend not to see (or read) the Domme profiles.  At the same time, I've never gotten the feeling that this site was turning into a pro-Domme network.  In the forums, I've never noticed if a poster was a pro or not, unless they mentioned it in their post  I just assumed it was the rantings of those few who objected in principle to any pro Domme's on here and were blowing the whole thing out of proportion <shrug> 

At the same time, if asked, I would say that pro Domme's should not be using their profiles to advertise.  They can pay for an ad if that's what they want from this site.  If they are pro but are here for their personal lifestyle (I know a number of pro Domme's who have their own subs as well as paying clients), to meet others (not as paying clients), participate in chats and forums with others in the lifestyle, I don't see a problem.  For instance, I work for PEP as a Domme (but I don't do in-person sessions, so not quite sure where that leaves me in the Domme/pro Domme spectrum), but I'm not here to drum up business (PEP does that very well, thank you).  I'm here to find a personal slave/pet of my very own, and nothing "pro" about it. 

As far as moderating the profile submissions... as long as collarme permits pro Domme's to advertise on their profiles, those moderating cannot do anything about it.  Since every profile and journal entry is checked before being posted, the rule could be something like "no reference to professional domination or financial payment for services provided." 

I am NOT against pro-Domme's.  Obviously.  And yet, I have to say that I do object to this FREE personals/social site being used by professionals to bring in business without having to pay for the advertising.  They are making money off their clients (quite a lot of it, too, sometimes)... let them pay to advertise here.  or go to that cupid something site where everyone advertises for free.

quote:

ORIGINAL: crouchingtigress
But i do empathize with the OP and Morgana and Arpig and all the others in that there are so many professionals here that it is beginning to feel like a Pro-Domme network and not a leather family community. 


< Message edited by LadyMorgynn -- 4/6/2006 10:57:06 AM >

_____________________________

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Lady Morgynn
www.farhorizons.net/LadyMorgynn

(in reply to crouchingtigress)
Profile   Post #: 128
RE: What is the Deal with all the Pro's - 4/6/2006 10:53:33 AM   
crouchingtigress


Posts: 4387
Joined: 3/19/2006
From: Maui
Status: offline 		No flames from me I assure you.
 
The question I would ask is do you concider what you do as working in the sex industry?
 
To me the core of the issue that riles folks, is that pro dommes seem unwilling and/or unable to call a spade a spade.
 
If you are paid for sexual services you are a sex worker, and there is nothing wrong with it, but it is awfully irritating to hear all these women rationalize that they are some how above that because they dont have intercourse.


~Tigress





quote:

ORIGINAL: LadySeraphina

I haven't read the whole thread, but I jumped in and viewed a bit, and I have to say that I am most certainly not about greed.  I have a wonderful man at home, I love him very much, and overall we live the D/s lifestyle.  He will soon be staying at home and doing the cooking, cleaning, and seeing to my needs.  In no way is that commercial, I love him and he loves me, and he enjoys pleasing me.  Which is as it should be.

My clients come to me to learn, to have fun, to play.  I help them relieve stress and feel good about their kinks.  For whatever reason they are not comfortable being in the Scene.  In some cases, yes, they have a mate who won't play, but in many they are high-profile and can't risk the exposure (or so they feel, but who am I to judge them?) or are afraid to face the Scene unprepared.  I have several clients who want to be in the Scene, but haven't been successful in fulfilling their needs yet, so they play with me in the mean time, with the benefit that receiving training increases their 'value' as submissives in the Scene.  (Their opinion, not mine.  I simply feel good about helping people, it's not up to me to make those judgements.)

Just my two cents, I hope it doesn't start a flame war.

Lady S


(in reply to LadySeraphina)
Profile   Post #: 129
RE: What is the Deal with all the Pro's - 4/6/2006 10:58:47 AM   
cntsbathry


Posts: 6
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline 		I agree with you crouchingtigress...If you get paid you're a sex worker regardless of intercourse.

I'm happy to see someone else looking at these issues rationally.

(in reply to crouchingtigress)
Profile   Post #: 130
RE: What is the Deal with all the Pro's - 4/6/2006 11:01:00 AM   
crouchingtigress


Posts: 4387
Joined: 3/19/2006
From: Maui
Status: offline 		Sorry if I missinterpreted your posts Lady Morgynn your solution is a good one "Since every profile and journal entry is checked before being posted, the rule could be something like "no reference to professional domination or financial payment for services provided."  

oh and  good luck with your search....
 
~Tigress

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyMorgynn

Actually, I don't know that the site *is* overrun with pro Domme's looking for clients.  As a Domme looking for a male sub, I tend not to see (or read) the Domme profiles.  At the same time, I've never gotten the feeling that this site was turning into a pro-Domme network.  In the forums, I've never noticed if a poster was a pro or not, unless they mentioned it in their post  I just assumed it was the rantings of those few who objected in principle to any pro Domme's on here and were blowing the whole thing out of proportion <shrug> 

At the same time, if asked, I would say that pro Domme's should not be using their profiles to advertise.  They can pay for an ad if that's what they want from this site.  If they are pro but are here for their personal lifestyle (I know a number of pro Domme's who have their own subs as well as paying clients), to meet others (not as paying clients), participate in chats and forums with others in the lifestyle, I don't see a problem.  For instance, I work for PEP as a Domme (but I don't do in-person sessions, so not quite sure where that leaves me in the Domme/pro Domme spectrum), but I'm not here to drum up business (PEP does that very well, thank you).  I'm here to find a personal slave/pet of my very own, and nothing "pro" about it. 

As far as moderating the profile submissions... as long as collarme permits pro Domme's to advertise on their profiles, those moderating cannot do anything about it. 
quote:

ORIGINAL: crouchingtigress
But i do empathize with the OP and Morgana and Arpig and all the others in that there are so many professionals here that it is beginning to feel like a Pro-Domme network and not a leather family community. 


(in reply to LadyMorgynn)
Profile   Post #: 131
RE: What is the Deal with all the Pro's - 4/6/2006 11:02:10 AM   
LadyMorgynn


Posts: 800
Joined: 11/25/2005
From: N. Carolina
Status: offline 		Actually, if you'll look back at the first pages of this thread, the core issue was (and really still is, although we've digressed a bit into the whore/not a whore area) that pro Domme's are using this site to advertise themselves on their profiles to get paying clients.  Sub men looking for Domme's to serve, apparently keep getting profiles of pro Domme's, and are frustrated.  Understandably so.

quote:

ORIGINAL: crouchingtigress
To me the core of the issue that riles folks, is that pro dommes seem unwilling and/or unable to call a spade a spade. 



_____________________________

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Lady Morgynn
www.farhorizons.net/LadyMorgynn

(in reply to crouchingtigress)
Profile   Post #: 132
RE: What is the Deal with all the Pro's - 4/6/2006 11:11:36 AM   
LadySeraphina


Posts: 931
Joined: 3/28/2006
From: Calgary, Canada
Status: offline 		Oh certainly I'm in the industry. I do only what I feel comfortable with, and am most definitely NOT a 'hooker' or 'whore' no matter what anyone says. That does not mean that I"m not in the sex industry, however. Of course, I'm in the 'film' industry too, so maybe that has left me with no high horses.

Regarding ads, on my profile I specify that I'm looking for friends and clients, but I only mention clients because I'm having a great deal of trouble making the young men (and not-so-young men) understand that I already HAVE a wonderful boy in my life, thank-you-very-much.

Lady S

(in reply to crouchingtigress)
Profile   Post #: 133
RE: What is the Deal with all the Pro's - 4/6/2006 11:14:20 AM   
valeca


Posts: 403
Joined: 1/9/2006
Status: offline 		I think you missed the point, but thanks for esssentially calling me dumb for adding my opinion--isn't that the same as the fool who invalidated your opinion based on your looks?

The idea was that perspectives are different.  You are entitled to yours, just as someone else is entitled to theirs--even if they are at opposite ends of the spectrum.  It IS all in the perspective, it's just that your perspective doesn't match those saying being a Pro-Domme doesn't make them hookers.  YOU might not be able to wrap your head around the idea that some forms of submission are not sexually related (service-oriented submission, for example); YOUR idea of what submission is does not translate to what others feel it is to them.  What gets one off, doesn't mean it gets everyone off, as you demonstrated by stating that watching the peelers is little more than a pleasant distraction over a few drinks, whereas another might cream in their drawers.  Satisfaction and/or fulfillment comes in many forms--not all of them sexual.

I will now bow out, as I rarely expect to change anyone's mind or their views.  I only offer my own as they relate to me.  I like to think I can do it without devaluing someone else's.



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~valeca, Owned and Operated by Loraith.

(in reply to Arpig)
Profile   Post #: 134
RE: What is the Deal with all the Pro's - 4/6/2006 11:14:31 AM   
Your Queen


Posts: 25
Joined: 1/10/2006
Status: offline
quote:

I see, now you know what i was thinking, and my motivation in choosing a particular word do you? Amazing power that.


I wouldn't call it "power" - I call it knowing BS when I see it, not so amazing, really.
It's written all over your arrogant posts and yes, I did choose the correct word.

(in reply to Arpig)
Profile   Post #: 135
RE: What is the Deal with all the Pro's - 4/6/2006 11:16:46 AM   
michaelGA


Posts: 1194
Status: offline 		i've made a poll regarding this topic

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Are we having fun, yet?

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Profile   Post #: 136
RE: What is the Deal with all the Pro's - 4/6/2006 11:18:37 AM   
LadyMorgynn


Posts: 800
Joined: 11/25/2005
From: N. Carolina
Status: offline 		I just checked the volunteer section... they are not looking for review folks right now.

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Lady Morgynn
www.farhorizons.net/LadyMorgynn

(in reply to LadyLivia)
Profile   Post #: 137
RE: What is the Deal with all the Pro's - 4/6/2006 11:28:03 AM   
Your Queen


Posts: 25
Joined: 1/10/2006
Status: offline
quote:

Sub men looking for Domme's to serve, apparently keep getting profiles of pro Domme's, and are frustrated.


I wonder if they are equally frustrated when they spot the profile of a domme doesn't fit their criteria?
Of course there will be profiles that aren't a good match - for whatever reason.
I get frustrated when I get messages from males who clearly don't fit my criteria, or messages from males with porn attached, or messages from guys who are looking for a bit on the side, or message from vanilla guys who think that enjoying bdsm makes women an easy lay, but it's no big deal, nor should it be a big deal. Just skip over them and stop your griping, for heavens sake
This whole thread is nothing more than a big baby whinefest.

(in reply to LadyMorgynn)
Profile   Post #: 138
RE: What is the Deal with all the Pro's - 4/6/2006 11:35:47 AM   
Mistrix


Posts: 186
Joined: 2/14/2006
Status: offline 		can I add this??
WOW.

(in reply to Your Queen)
Profile   Post #: 139
RE: What is the Deal with all the Pro's - 4/6/2006 11:44:45 AM   
Mistrix


Posts: 186
Joined: 2/14/2006
Status: offline 		Noticed that when I reply to a post it goes directly to the one above me. NOT intended at all.
Seems like there are more personality differences than real talk about Pro Dom.  But interesting topic of course with wonderful shades of grey.

(in reply to Mistrix)
Profile   Post #: 140
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