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How do i find a slave? - 5/5/2010 2:35:57 AM

phillipwong

Posts: 10
Joined: 5/5/2010
Status: offline

I am uncertain how to find a submissive female slave in my area( san jose). From what ever i can find online, it tells me to go to some online websites. Is this the only option in the market right now? Are there any Master-slave gathering in San Francisco? I am complete loss here, and i would appreciate a step by step process for finding a slave girl. Can anyone help me?

< Message edited by phillipwong -- 5/5/2010 2:40:46 AM >

Post #: 1

RE: How do i find a slave? - 5/5/2010 2:48:21 AM

jbcurious

Posts: 717
Joined: 3/13/2010
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: phillipwong

I am uncertain how to find a submissive female slave in my area( san jose). From what ever i can find online, it tells me to go to some online websites. Is this the only option in the market right now? Are there any Master-slave gathering in San Francisco? I am complete loss here, and i would appreciate a step by step process for finding a slave girl. Can anyone help me?

The fact that you're at a complete loss and that you show no experience in your profile would lead me to say that you probably aren't going to have much luck.

Why don't you start by getting more information and exposure by attending some of the clubs in SF...I haven't been in the area for a while but I believe bondage a go go is still going.

< Message edited by jbcurious -- 5/5/2010 2:57:51 AM >

_____________________________

'Smile... it's the second best thing to do with your lips.'

I have an explosive personality...

(in reply to phillipwong)

Post #: 2

RE: How do i find a slave? - 5/5/2010 3:06:20 AM

Focus50

Posts: 3962
Joined: 12/28/2004
From: Newcastle, Australia
Status: offline

Finding a slave is half the story - you may find one who doesn't wanna be found by *you*...!

So you need a profile with a bit more info than your height, age and nationality. And do you really wanna call yourself a "dominate"? Because that error says a lot more about you than just being new to the lifestyle...

I'll give you a hint....

A noun describes objects. Eg - car, horse, man, dominant, book etc.

And a verb describes actions. Eg - run, jump, dominate, throw etc.

I'm sure the ladies will be along with more specific help.

And welcome to the boards.

Focus.

_____________________________

Never underestimate the persuasive power of stupid people in large groups. <unknown>

Your food is for eating, not torturing. <my mum> (Errm, when I was a kid)

(in reply to phillipwong)

Post #: 3

RE: How do i find a slave? - 5/5/2010 3:10:51 AM

phillipwong

Posts: 10
Joined: 5/5/2010
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: jbcurious

quote:

ORIGINAL: phillipwong

I am uncertain how to find a submissive female slave in my area( san jose). From what ever i can find online, it tells me to go to some online websites. Is this the only option in the market right now? Are there any Master-slave gathering in San Francisco? I am complete loss here, and i would appreciate a step by step process for finding a slave girl. Can anyone help me?

The fact that you're at a complete loss and that you show no experience in your profile would lead me to say that you probably aren't going to have much luck.

Why don't you start by getting more information and exposure by attending some of the clubs in SF...I haven't been in the area for a while but I believe bondage a go go is still going.

You are right. I do lack experience. I would like to change my luck. I will go to bondage-a-go-go.

If it is not too much trouble, can you give more references? ( eg: books, clubs, etc) I want to learn as much as possible.

(in reply to jbcurious)

Post #: 4

RE: How do i find a slave? - 5/5/2010 3:14:58 AM

phillipwong

Posts: 10
Joined: 5/5/2010
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50

Finding a slave is half the story - you may find one who doesn't wanna be found by *you*...!

So you need a profile with a bit more info than your height, age and nationality. And do you really wanna call yourself a "dominate"? Because that error says a lot more about you than just being new to the lifestyle...

I'll give you a hint....

A noun describes objects. Eg - car, horse, man, dominant, book etc.

And a verb describes actions. Eg - run, jump, dominate, throw etc.

I'm sure the ladies will be along with more specific help.

And welcome to the boards.

Focus.

I appreciate the advise.

(in reply to Focus50)

Post #: 5

RE: How do i find a slave? - 5/5/2010 3:17:53 AM

jbcurious

Posts: 717
Joined: 3/13/2010
Status: offline

As I said, I'm no longer in the area but do know that there are a lot of activities there and a large BDSM community. I'm sure there will be additional people who will post here and be able to give you more info. Good luck and happy learning!

_____________________________

'Smile... it's the second best thing to do with your lips.'

I have an explosive personality...

(in reply to phillipwong)

Post #: 6

RE: How do i find a slave? - 5/5/2010 3:19:30 AM

phillipwong

Posts: 10
Joined: 5/5/2010
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: jbcurious

As I said, I'm no longer in the area but do know that there are a lot of activities there and a large BDSM community. I'm sure there will be additional people who will post here and be able to give you more info. Good luck and happy learning!

Thank you very much, jbcurious.

(in reply to jbcurious)

Post #: 7

RE: How do i find a slave? - 5/5/2010 3:47:58 AM

Focus50

Posts: 3962
Joined: 12/28/2004
From: Newcastle, Australia
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: phillipwong

I appreciate the advise.

And I'm sure you'll appreciate me biting my tongue here.... lol

Focus.

_____________________________

Never underestimate the persuasive power of stupid people in large groups. <unknown>

Your food is for eating, not torturing. <my mum> (Errm, when I was a kid)

(in reply to phillipwong)

Post #: 8

RE: How do i find a slave? - 5/5/2010 3:55:48 AM

phillipwong

Posts: 10
Joined: 5/5/2010
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50

quote:

ORIGINAL: phillipwong

I appreciate the advise.

And I'm sure you'll appreciate me biting my tongue here.... lol

Focus.

That can` t be good.

(in reply to Focus50)

Post #: 9

RE: How do i find a slave? - 5/5/2010 4:02:33 AM

jbcurious

Posts: 717
Joined: 3/13/2010
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50

quote:

ORIGINAL: phillipwong

I appreciate the advise.

And I'm sure you'll appreciate me biting my tongue here.... lol

Focus.

Play nice, he's sweet... You know my reply would have been much different had he tried to BS his way through.

To the Op, there aren't many people online just now so don't be discouraged...I'm sure someone will be able to give you some info. For the most part it's a nice group of people on the forums.

_____________________________

'Smile... it's the second best thing to do with your lips.'

I have an explosive personality...

(in reply to Focus50)

Post #: 10

RE: How do i find a slave? - 5/5/2010 4:10:49 AM

sunshinemiss

Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline

I'm thinking that the OP's first language is not English. He's making common mistakes for people whose 1st language isn't English. He's doing a great job with that in mind.

Good luck in your search Phillip.
sunshine

_____________________________

Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

(in reply to jbcurious)

Post #: 11

RE: How do i find a slave? - 5/5/2010 5:11:57 AM

DarkSteven

Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline

Philip, the very first step is to Google "BDSM San Jose." I'd be shocked if there weren't a club or two close by.

You're an academic, so used to learning from books. They'll only take you so far... but anyway, here's a list that ResidentSadist gave: http://www.collarchat.com/m_1726118/tm.htm

Don't even think of learning from the BDSM porn clips or movies. That's fantasy, not reality.

And hang around here a lot and read.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to sunshinemiss)

Post #: 12

RE: How do i find a slave? - 5/5/2010 7:04:44 AM

SassySarijane

Posts: 1558
Joined: 12/20/2007
From: KC Area Missouri
Status: offline

To find non-fiction bdsm books http://www.greenerypress.com/ is your best bet. You can then either get them through there or write down the titles and authors you are interested in and search for them on Amazon, Barnes and Noble online, Powells Books, Books a Million, Borders, etc. and possibly even find some used.

As DarkSteven said, books will only take you so far and the reality will be far different from thinking, dreaming, wishing and reading about it.

_____________________________

Sarah2
Deviant Mind
Wild Side Readers
LPTnB

(in reply to DarkSteven)

Post #: 13

RE: How do i find a slave? - 5/5/2010 7:15:44 AM

pompeii

Posts: 934
Joined: 1/4/2007
From: Silicon Valley, San Jose, California
Status: offline

Ad-hoc recipe for a San Jose Dom looking for a slave:

Step 1: You're in San Jose. There are three munches here in the south bay. Google "Southern Cross Munch" which meets this Friday at 6pm and show up. If you're there, I can talk to you there. Likewise, try the San Jose Munch on Mondays, and the so-called Palo Alto Munch on Wednesdays. That's a start. If you don't know what a munch is, google it. Go to one or more of these munches periodically; and, if you're worth it, a slave will come to you (see, easy!).

Step 2: At the same time, get some practice being a Dom. Take $150 out of your pocket and drive up 101 to Mountainview. Next to the Costco should be the backdrop club (www.backdrop.net). Pick a lovely winsome gal and have your way with her for an hour. Tie her up. Slap her ass. Clamp her tits. Have her on her knees blindfolded in front of you - whatever you like, she'll do (within reason).

Step 3: Get some more experience. This time hike out to Oakland across the Bay Bridge and head over to the Victorian house called www.thegatessm.com. Plop $160 (you're in graduate school now), and again choose a winsome lass to have your way with. They will be very accommodating. They'll interview you first, to see what you want to do, and then they'll choose a room which contains all the equipment you could want for stringing her up and having your way with her. She'll obey your every command (again, within reason). Ask me how I know.

Step 4: The penultimate step is to join Fetlife, Bondage.com, Alt.com, and/or Collarme.com. Be active. Be reactive. Add a profile but, as noted, learn to spell and use grammar properly; even learn to use a semicolon - the slave gals love when you complete a sentence properly w/o making any grammatical mistakes. Leave the mistakes to the subs.

Step 5. Point your browser to sfbay.craigslist.com and post an ad or two. Say who you are and what you want. You'll get plenty of action, trust me. You will have to deal with spammers and scammers but that's life. You'll have to meet them and talk to them and take them to lunches and dinner, but, again, that's all the fun isn't it? You will meet plenty of flakes and fakes; but, if you persist, you WILL find yourself a willingly submissive and compatible slave to your needs (bearing in mind that you'll be providing her far more, in then end, than she will be providing you), by way of attention and thought and effort.

That's the game. If anyone in the Silicon Valley wishes to improve this recipe, please do (I could use the help too!). :)

(in reply to DarkSteven)

Post #: 14

RE: How do i find a slave? - 5/5/2010 7:21:44 AM

leadership527

Posts: 5026
Joined: 6/2/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: phillipwong
I am uncertain how to find a submissive female slave in my area( san jose). From what ever i can find online, it tells me to go to some online websites. Is this the only option in the market right now? Are there any Master-slave gathering in San Francisco? I am complete loss here, and i would appreciate a step by step process for finding a slave girl. Can anyone help me?

Google for your area and bdsm munches. Go meet people in the real world doing this stuff.

Next, define what you mean by "slave" (I'm guessing you mean sub).
Next, define what you want to DO with the sub/slave you find
Put all that in your profile.

_____________________________

~Jeff

I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

(in reply to phillipwong)

Post #: 15

RE: How do i find a slave? - 5/5/2010 7:44:58 AM

MistressOfGa

Posts: 2929
Status: offline

I havent read any replies, so excuse if I am repeating.

I went to google and typed in "Munch in san fran" and came up with a whole slew of activities in your area. Including a TNG group. What seems to be the problem? Get out there and hit a few of these social gatherings. Simple as that

MoGa

_____________________________

(in reply to leadership527)

Post #: 16

RE: How do i find a slave? - 5/5/2010 9:31:50 AM

Musicmystery

Posts: 30259
Joined: 3/14/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss
I'm thinking that the OP's first language is not English. He's making common mistakes for people whose 1st language isn't English. He's doing a great job with that in mind.

I agree--that was my first thought as well.

[Why is she fainting? ]

(in reply to sunshinemiss)

Post #: 17

RE: How do i find a slave? - 5/5/2010 10:14:41 AM

AquaticSub

Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline

Fast Reply

Sounds like you've already gotten some great advice. I would just add to rememer that you are looking for a person who is also submissive. While quality is essential, don't forget that there will be other factors that determine if you and a sub are compatible or not. Also, check out the munches and just be yourself. Be open about the fact that you are new. As long as you are polite and respectful, people should be willing to help you out as they can. :-)

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to Musicmystery)

Post #: 18

RE: How do i find a slave? - 5/5/2010 3:31:28 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

Google bdsm checklists and see what appeals to you. Then go to workshops, and buy books, and read about how to do the various activities safely.

As far as someone allowing you to take control of her, that means you have to prove yourself a trustworthy person with good decision making skills. Because if you make bad decisions, she won't trust you to take control. Do you keep your word always? Do you have control of your temper or do you take out your bad moods on the people around you?

Become someone that a submissive would be drawn to and you'll find submissive females attracted to you. You date I assume, so talk to these various ladies about what your interests are. But if you are afraid to discuss what you like sexually because of fear of rejection, then you aren't confident and won't appeal as dominant. A quietly confident man comes off as dominant, fearful ones don't.

Besides it isn't fair to them to have sex with them and afterward mention you like bondage or s & m or whatever. Do it before so they don't feel like another notch on your bedpost. Because doing that to someone, hurting them casually is not the sign of a man who is trustworthy.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to AquaticSub)

Post #: 19

RE: How do i find a slave? - 5/5/2010 3:43:38 PM

whiteslavebitch

Posts: 479
Joined: 9/10/2007
Status: offline

It takes time. Google "munches" then attend. Take classes in various areas of interest R/T BDSM. Buy some books on the subject and read them. Live your ordinary life until you find someone who interests you.

_____________________________

MasterK's whiteslavebitch

formally collared 1/30/09

"I give to you my everything, you've given me these loving wings." - DMB

(in reply to phillipwong)

Post #: 20

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