Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

Shy Quiet sub/slave has difficulty meeting Dominant Women and even more dificulty maintaining a conv


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Mistress >> Shy Quiet sub/slave has difficulty meeting Dominant Women and even more dificulty maintaining a conv Page: [1]
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
Shy Quiet sub/slave has difficulty meeting Dominant Wom... - 4/7/2006 1:39:18 AM   
miek05


Posts: 2
Joined: 7/28/2005
Status: offline 		Hi Beautiful Mistresses,
i got a problem. i am painfully shy and quiet. it is very dificult for me to approach any woman let alone a Beautiful Mistress and convey to her what my interests are.

One of the worse parts about this is that i am an athlete, and i carry a lot of muscle, Believe it or not, it did not give me the self confidence i thought it would.

Any way, does any one have any suggestions to meet Ladies who happen to be Mistresses? i would appreciate any help any one has.

Thank You,

miek
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Shy Quiet sub/slave has difficulty meeting Dominant... - 4/7/2006 5:02:12 AM   
LadyMorgynn


Posts: 800
Joined: 11/25/2005
From: N. Carolina
Status: offline 		First off, write a little bit more about yourself and  your interest (since you don't have much experience) in this lifestyle.  When approaching Domme's here, read their full profile first.  If they want a sissy slut, and you are no WAY going to put on women's panties, that's a clear mis-match.  Then write a nice email (doesn't have to be long) telling Her why you have chosen to write to Her, particularly.... what about Her profile interested you enough to write.

In a real-life setting, such as at a dungeon or munch, introduce yourself first to the Dungeon Master, or whomever is in charge, and let that person introduce you around.  Don't expect to play right away, but take your time, talk to people and let them get to know you, and I'm sure someone will take interest in you, but give it time :)


_____________________________

---
Lady Morgynn
www.farhorizons.net/LadyMorgynn

(in reply to miek05)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Shy Quiet sub/slave has difficulty meeting Dominant... - 4/7/2006 6:52:09 AM   
MsSonnetMarwood


Posts: 1898
Joined: 2/10/2005
From: Eastern Shore, Maryland
Status: offline 		I've been on countless dates with sub males who have been of the "quiet/shy" type who would not step out of their box and actually <gasp> talk to me, which of course was the point of  me meeting them in the first place - to get to know one another a bit.

I decline second dates when this happens, and they're always surprised by that.

Here's the point -  you are going to have to step outside of your comfort zone if you expect to make a connection with someone.  This will take some practice, but if you play the shy wallflower all the time, you'll BE the shy, lonely wallflower.

A Domme is NOT going to walk up to you on the street, club you over the head, and drag you off to her lair.  You're going to have to make the effort to open up and put yourself out there.  You have to MAKE this happen.

_____________________________

~Ms. Sonnet Marwood~

Deja Moo: The feeling you've heard this bull somewhere before.

(in reply to miek05)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Shy Quiet sub/slave has difficulty meeting Dominant... - 4/7/2006 6:57:01 AM   
MochaMistress


Posts: 275
Joined: 1/8/2006
Status: offline 		If you are speaking of meeting a Domme online. You could start out by sending a polite introduction email stating a little about yourself, your interests and a photo.

(in reply to miek05)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Shy Quiet sub/slave has difficulty meeting Dominant... - 4/7/2006 7:05:35 AM   
TeeGO


Posts: 451
Joined: 12/11/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MsSonnetMarwood
A Domme is NOT going to walk up to you on the street, club you over the head, and drag you off to her lair.

Now that is a fantasy...wow!! I can see it now, walking around in a daze today thinking about this only to get hit by a car and waking up in a hospital instead of a Domme's lair.

To the OP. I can relate. I'm somewhat like that myself, but more so only in meeting new people. (Only took me three months to actually write a profile here and put up pic.) There is NO other answer other than pulling the ability out of yourself and taking some risks. Nothing is accomplished by sitting back and doing nothing. Remember the aging Jack Palance, in a commercial after his reclaimed fame in the Billy Crystal movies, "Confidence is very sexy, don't you think?" I know some think confidence makes the Dom. But it's also true for the sub. It's the kink and the way one is wired that makes one a Dom or a sub not confidence. Confidence make one successful while lack of the same brings failure. And that's the bottom line. Or bottom's line.

Edited to add:  I'm underneath the MochaMistress.  Oh yea!  Oh yea!

< Message edited by TeeGO -- 4/7/2006 7:10:03 AM >

(in reply to MsSonnetMarwood)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Shy Quiet sub/slave has difficulty meeting Dominant... - 4/7/2006 7:36:26 AM   
GoddessAlexia


Posts: 37
Joined: 9/1/2004
Status: offline 		You need to take a first step, no one will do that for you, remeber you have only one life.

_____________________________

Goddess Alexia
www.mistressalexia.com
www.theplatinumcage.com

(in reply to TeeGO)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Shy Quiet sub/slave has difficulty meeting Dominant... - 4/7/2006 7:41:37 AM   
thetammyjo


Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline 		Sadly you have to work on being less shy.

You say you are an athlete -- solo or team? If its team, then you know how to interact with probably male athletes. Perhaps you should try particpating in some co-ed events; maybe that would help you feel more comfortable around women.

The other way to work on it is to force yourself to go to things like munches and workshops, lectures and conventions. I'm sure some of these are within a few hours of you but you'll need to find them.

You go and you are totally quiet. Big deal. Each time you make yourself go you will learn something and hopefully get more comfortable.

Clearly if you are an athlete you can discipline yourself physically and mentally. Consider learning to be less shy another thing to discipline yourself and work on.

It will not be easy but you'll grow so much as you try to work on it.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to miek05)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Shy Quiet sub/slave has difficulty meeting Dominant... - 4/7/2006 9:00:58 AM   
LadyMorgynn


Posts: 800
Joined: 11/25/2005
From: N. Carolina
Status: offline 		Here is a shining example of a wonderful profile that I should think almost any Domme would want to respond to:  slavesissymaid

I don't want a sissy, nor do I want to have my slave chained, but this was such a lovely written profile that I immediately felt a great affection for him.  It is fluent, respectful, gratifyingly submissive without groveling, he states his wants very clearly as well as his wish to adore as well as obey.

_____________________________

---
Lady Morgynn
www.farhorizons.net/LadyMorgynn

(in reply to thetammyjo)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Shy Quiet sub/slave has difficulty meeting Dominant... - 4/7/2006 9:06:30 AM   
fergus


Posts: 1110
Joined: 6/22/2005
Status: offline 		lol, us extroverted sub types have trouble meeting Dominant women also ;)

Don't fret ... just keep trying, and have patience :)

fergus

(in reply to LadyMorgynn)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Shy Quiet sub/slave has difficulty meeting Dominant... - 4/7/2006 2:05:30 PM   
Lashra


Posts: 4900
Joined: 2/9/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MsSonnetMarwood


A Domme is NOT going to walk up to you on the street, club you over the head, and drag you off to her lair.  You're going to have to make the effort to open up and put yourself out there.  You have to MAKE this happen.


I'd club fergus and drag him back to my hidden volcano lair

~Lashra

(in reply to MsSonnetMarwood)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Shy Quiet sub/slave has difficulty meeting Dominant... - 4/7/2006 2:25:08 PM   
fergus


Posts: 1110
Joined: 6/22/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lashra

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsSonnetMarwood


A Domme is NOT going to walk up to you on the street, club you over the head, and drag you off to her lair.  You're going to have to make the effort to open up and put yourself out there.  You have to MAKE this happen.


I'd club fergus and drag him back to my hidden volcano lair

~Lashra


Promises, Promises ;)

fergus

(in reply to Lashra)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Shy Quiet sub/slave has difficulty meeting Dominant... - 4/7/2006 2:37:02 PM   
ShiftedJewel


Posts: 2492
Joined: 12/2/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lashra

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsSonnetMarwood


A Domme is NOT going to walk up to you on the street, club you over the head, and drag you off to her lair.  You're going to have to make the effort to open up and put yourself out there.  You have to MAKE this happen.


I'd club fergus and drag him back to my hidden volcano lair

~Lashra


Who wouldn't??? lol

_____________________________

Don't ask, trust me, you won't like the answer... no one ever does.

(in reply to Lashra)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Shy Quiet sub/slave has difficulty meeting Dominant... - 4/7/2006 8:23:16 PM   
MochaMistress


Posts: 275
Joined: 1/8/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TeeGO
Edited to add:  I'm underneath the MochaMistress.  Oh yea!  Oh yea!



Perfect place to be.

(in reply to TeeGO)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Shy Quiet sub/slave has difficulty meeting Dominant... - 4/8/2006 9:13:25 AM   
fergus


Posts: 1110
Joined: 6/22/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ShiftedJewel

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lashra

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsSonnetMarwood


A Domme is NOT going to walk up to you on the street, club you over the head, and drag you off to her lair.  You're going to have to make the effort to open up and put yourself out there.  You have to MAKE this happen.


I'd club fergus and drag him back to my hidden volcano lair

~Lashra


Who wouldn't??? lol


And yet, here I sit 'unclubed'

*sigh*

Some days I feel like the straight man in a dark satircal comedy.

fergus

(in reply to ShiftedJewel)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Shy Quiet sub/slave has difficulty meeting Dominant... - 4/8/2006 9:19:15 AM   
ShiftedJewel


Posts: 2492
Joined: 12/2/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: fergus

quote:

ORIGINAL: ShiftedJewel

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lashra

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsSonnetMarwood


A Domme is NOT going to walk up to you on the street, club you over the head, and drag you off to her lair.  You're going to have to make the effort to open up and put yourself out there.  You have to MAKE this happen.


I'd club fergus and drag him back to my hidden volcano lair

~Lashra


Who wouldn't??? lol


And yet, here I sit 'unclubed'

*sigh*

Some days I feel like the straight man in a dark satircal comedy.

fergus


Trust me... I've been looking for a club that wouldn't damage that beautiful mind...

_____________________________

Don't ask, trust me, you won't like the answer... no one ever does.

(in reply to fergus)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Shy Quiet sub/slave has difficulty meeting Dominant... - 4/8/2006 9:31:31 AM   
fergus


Posts: 1110
Joined: 6/22/2005
Status: offline 		"Trust me... I've been looking for a club that wouldn't damage that beautiful mind... "

Thanks! ;)  Though you have yet to see the darker recesses ;)

fergus


(in reply to ShiftedJewel)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Shy Quiet sub/slave has difficulty meeting Dominant... - 4/8/2006 9:34:37 AM   
ShiftedJewel


Posts: 2492
Joined: 12/2/2004
Status: offline
quote:

Thanks! ;)  Though you have yet to see the darker recesses ;)


Isn't that part of what makes it so beautiful?

_____________________________

Don't ask, trust me, you won't like the answer... no one ever does.

(in reply to fergus)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Shy Quiet sub/slave has difficulty meeting Dominant... - 4/8/2006 9:41:41 AM   
fergus


Posts: 1110
Joined: 6/22/2005
Status: offline 		"Isn't that part of what makes it so beautiful? "

I reckon others would be a better judge than myself, so I will happily take your word for it ;)

fergus

(hope we haven't hi-jacked the thread TOO badly!)

(in reply to ShiftedJewel)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Shy Quiet sub/slave has difficulty meeting Dominant... - 4/8/2006 9:44:46 AM   
ShiftedJewel


Posts: 2492
Joined: 12/2/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: fergus

"Isn't that part of what makes it so beautiful? "

I reckon others would be a better judge than myself, so I will happily take your word for it ;)

fergus

(hope we haven't hi-jacked the thread TOO badly!)



The thread?? Oh, yeah, the thread!! Sorry, my mind had wander elsewhere... now, you wanna talk darker recesses? lmao

_____________________________

Don't ask, trust me, you won't like the answer... no one ever does.

(in reply to fergus)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Shy Quiet sub/slave has difficulty meeting Dominant... - 4/8/2006 5:37:58 PM   
mons


Posts: 2400
Joined: 11/16/2005
Status: offline 		Mieko5

I am a little different I enjoy shy men! I am shy myself and this helps me from being shy!
Like many of the ladies here said you need to make a profile if you do not have one!
If you have found someone you wish to meet or talk with write a note telling her why you choose her
many ladies here and myself I like the ideal of a man writing to me and saying
very nice thing but nothing to overboard but make it truthful. Then if this dommes wants
you she will guide you shy as you are you maybe worth guiding. I think someone metion a
dungeon I think that is too much for someone who is this shy and new! One domme to take you
on. Then go from there your shy someone will help you remember profile, then nice letter to
the domme who catches your eye. Good luck Mieko5

best wishes
mons/jane

(in reply to miek05)
Profile   Post #: 20
Page:   [1]
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Mistress >> Shy Quiet sub/slave has difficulty meeting Dominant Women and even more dificulty maintaining a conv Page: [1]
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.098