RE: How much do you tip your waitress?

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NuevaVida -> RE: How much do you tip your waitress? (6/12/2010 6:43:38 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: kdsub There you go...you think you are a judge of character and the situation without experiencing it...so be it then. Butch Hi Butch, I received your post to me as observation and not argument, as intended, so I hope you can receive this the same. Everyone judges. Those who think your mom did the right thing are also judging. [;)]

barelynangel -> RE: How much do you tip your waitress? (6/12/2010 6:45:34 PM)
laughs, juliaoceania this sudden need to attack me personally is really sad on your part and seems you lately say this to me all the time when i don't agree with you. She WAS acting like a bitch -- unless you call her stalking over slamming money down on the table and flouncing away without a fucking word to her customers as what princess behavior or even acceptable client treatment. Yeah actually i would and sounds like MANY PEOPLE HERE would do the same if they had problems with servers- go to a manager. But i guess because i would do it i am wrong lol and no one else is lol. I am not being condescending, i am being realistic and don't believe in making excuses for people who work for a living when they deal with clients and/or customers. Obviously you like making excuses. However, if i expect myself to treat clients one way, i damn well expect others to treat me when i am a client or customer as i do my clients. Yeah its called expectations and if i can treat my clients with professionalism, not burden them with my life issues attitude or how heavy my work load is etc and make them feel i am in complete control -- yeah, i expect others to do so in other professions. IF that makes me condescending, then so be it. Are you so afraid of what i actually said you can do nothing but attack me personally when all i did was comment on the post made? GO YOU! angel

kdsub -> RE: How much do you tip your waitress? (6/12/2010 6:46:43 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: NuevaVida quote: ORIGINAL: kdsub There you go...you think you are a judge of character and the situation without experiencing it...so be it then. Butch Hi Butch, I received your post to me as observation and not argument, as intended, so I hope you can receive this the same. Everyone judges. Those who think your mom did the right thing are also judging. [;)] I am sorry I did not mean that post for you I meant it for julia... I thank all for you comments on this issue.. It was just a sidebar and I don't mean for it to take up the thread... Butch

juliaoceania -> RE: How much do you tip your waitress? (6/12/2010 6:50:25 PM)
quote: Those who think your mom did the right thing are also judging. Yes I am[:D] I am extraordinarily judgmental, Sinergy would tell ya that....smiles

NuevaVida -> RE: How much do you tip your waitress? (6/12/2010 6:50:54 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: kdsub I am sorry I did not mean that post for you I meant it for julia... I thank all for you comments on this issue.. It was just a sidebar and I don't mean for it to take up the thread... Butch No worries, I know it wasn't for me. I was just side-barring a little further because I'm a dorky literalist.

subtee -> RE: How much do you tip your waitress? (6/12/2010 6:58:52 PM)
~FR In the same way that one cannot hope to envision what a server's life might be like, one cannot envision what a patron's life might be like. Therefore, we have to rely on reasonable expectations and customs when it comes to dining out. In the same way it is expected to tip, it is expected to receive gracious service and our own decision when it comes time to decide a tip. No one should be expected to think outside these bounds. It's not reasonable. This is a professional relationship lasting an hour or two. Part of being a person employed as a server is accepting that the gratitude, expressed in tip, will be varied. If he or she can't accept that as part of the job, they should look elsewhere. IMHO

barelynangel -> RE: How much do you tip your waitress? (6/12/2010 7:06:07 PM)
I never said she should be fired for poor service, i said i hope she was fired for what she did and to me what she did was accosted a customer. Running after a customer to say something smart and throw money at them, yeah -- sorry i don't think she should have kept her job. That's not ill will, that's having expectations that customers can walk into that establishment without worrying about being accosted by a pissed off waitress. i have had to fire people in my job before and i didn't wish people ill will when i believed they needed to be fired. In this case, accosting a customer to me would be a firing offense. angel

kdsub -> RE: How much do you tip your waitress? (6/12/2010 7:14:30 PM)
We all know Julia’s temperament here on the boards...if she says she would understand and still leave a tip I believe her. Thats my [sm=2cents.gif] [:D] Now I'm off to look for a good bargin on the Brookyn Bridge. Butch

zephyroftheNorth -> RE: How much do you tip your waitress? (6/12/2010 7:14:31 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: heartcream quote: ORIGINAL: SmokingGun82 First, I should note that I tend to over tip habitually... but I do have a question no one has been able to answer for me. The argument for not stiffing a waiter/waitress is that they work for less than minimum wage, and the tips are to make up for that. So... why exactly is what they should get/expect based on how much the food costs? For instance, here in Wisconsin minimum wage for wait staff is 2.35. So if I go to dinner with five friends, spend an hour there, assume we're her only table, and leave a twenty dollar tip on a three hundred dollar bill... why would that be cheap? For that hour she made 22.35- which isn't bad, really. It's not something I do, or plan to start doing... I'm just curious if there's a flaw in my line of thought. A eensy bit deluded on the 'over tipping' if 20 bucks for five people on a 300 bill is your math. Yikes. Dude not even 10%. What do you expect, for some reason he thinks she would only have one table.

gungadin09 -> RE: How much do you tip your waitress? (6/12/2010 9:18:34 PM)
i usually tip about 20%. i know that's extremely high. i work in the industry, and i want to be generous. i don't undertip unless the service was atrocious. pam

Glasgow -> RE: How much do you tip your waitress? (6/12/2010 9:23:51 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: gungadin09 i usually tip about 20%. i know that's extremely high. i work in the industry, and i want to be generous. i don't undertip unless the service was atrocious. pam I expect that if I worked in the industry I would tip a great deal more than I do. As it is, I use my handy EZ Tip Calc on my phone set to 15%. I would like to say, though, that I should get brownie points for tipping for my cheapskate friends who only leave enough money to cover the bill.

Glasgow -> RE: How much do you tip your waitress? (6/12/2010 9:30:18 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: subtee ~FR In the same way that one cannot hope to envision what a server's life might be like, one cannot envision what a patron's life might be like. Therefore, we have to rely on reasonable expectations and customs when it comes to dining out. In the same way it is expected to tip, it is expected to receive gracious service and our own decision when it comes time to decide a tip. No one should be expected to think outside these bounds. It's not reasonable. This is a professional relationship lasting an hour or two. Part of being a person employed as a server is accepting that the gratitude, expressed in tip, will be varied. If he or she can't accept that as part of the job, they should look elsewhere. IMHO Normally I would agree that you shouldn't work in a job that you aren't compatible with, but that's not the way the world works. People don't dream of becoming servers since childhood. Usually, being a server is a job you have to take because you can't get a better job elsewhere. Food service is a very stressful job. America would be a wonderful country (and, indeed, every country besides) if everyone was working in a job that they were fully compatible with. But if that were true, we wouldn't have wonderful comedies like The Office, now would we?

WyldHrt -> RE: How much do you tip your waitress? (6/12/2010 10:56:10 PM)
quote: i usually tip about 20%. i know that's extremely high. i work in the industry, and i want to be generous. i don't undertip unless the service was atrocious. 20% is extremely high? Odd, that's my standard tip, and that of many on this thread.

subtee -> RE: How much do you tip your waitress? (6/12/2010 11:20:05 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Glasgow Normally I would agree that you shouldn't work in a job that you aren't compatible with, but that's not the way the world works. People don't dream of becoming servers since childhood. Usually, being a server is a job you have to take because you can't get a better job elsewhere. Food service is a very stressful job. America would be a wonderful country (and, indeed, every country besides) if everyone was working in a job that they were fully compatible with. But if that were true, we wouldn't have wonderful comedies like The Office, now would we? Woah, thank you for telling how the world works! That's very generous of you. And for expressing the collective stress of the food service professionals of America. And also those of us--them I mean them, who might not be in a job they were fully compatible with. You have schooled us--me, I mean me--for the unempathetic post. Now I see.

LafayetteLady -> RE: How much do you tip your waitress? (6/12/2010 11:20:51 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WyldHrt quote: i usually tip about 20%. i know that's extremely high. i work in the industry, and i want to be generous. i don't undertip unless the service was atrocious. 20% is extremely high? Odd, that's my standard tip, and that of many on this thread. Therein lies the problem. Even the newest technology automatically defaults to what was considered an appropriate tip before that technology existed. Sadly, a good number of the people on this thread will never understand the concept of what a "decent" tip is. Even a few that claim to have worked in the business in the past seem to be clueless based on the statements they made about when they were "in the business." Waiting tables is extremely difficult work, especially in those "casual family diners." A 5 star restaurant realizes that no server, no matter how good they are can provide excellent service to more than 4, possibly 5 tables at a time. And before anyone tries to boast about how they give excellent service even when they have 10 or 12 tables, no one is saying that when overloaded with tables you suck, but you are kidding yourself if you think "excellent" service is what you are providing to that many tables. There is a reason why most high end restaurants keep the stations at around 4 tables per server. Working in the "casual family diner," such theories become incredibly flexible. Those servers are usually over sat (and often double and triple sat or more). Now in a place where the policy is to greet a table and get a drink order in less than a minute, that just ain't gonna happen when the hostess just sat 3 tables in your section all at once. Those "casual family diners" are privately owned, and usually run by very tempermental people who have no problem yelling and screaming at employees whereever they want. Which of course delays getting to the table even more. I was a trainer at one of those places. All the servers I trained were trained as though they were working in a high end restaurant. In other words, they were taught how to take the orders in the proper rotation so they could remember where the food went, how to properly carry a tray, the correct side to serve and clear, and all those other little "details." No one is delivering their food for them like in a high end restaurant. In fact, half the time you are lucky if you can get someone to grab the second (and possibly third) tray to take to a big table. Those servers still need to know about the food, and in a lot of those places, computers still aren't in use, so the server is also adding up your check manually, including tax. Meanwhile if we are to believe the majority of the people on this thread, they all are exceptional almost all the time, taking a dozen tables, contacting the health department for minor violations and the rest all eat at the high end establishments paying big bucks for their meal. Personally, I don't buy it. But at the end of the day, I guess it strokes everyone's ego to say what they are saying, so there isn't much point to everyone continuing to berate each other with their cheapness, cattiness or otherwise for another 20 pages.

tazzygirl -> RE: How much do you tip your waitress? (6/13/2010 5:06:18 AM)
quote: Working in the "casual family diner," such theories become incredibly flexible. Those servers are usually over sat (and often double and triple sat or more). Now in a place where the policy is to greet a table and get a drink order in less than a minute, that just ain't gonna happen when the hostess just sat 3 tables in your section all at once. Those "casual family diners" are privately owned, and usually run by very tempermental people who have no problem yelling and screaming at employees whereever they want. Which of course delays getting to the table even more. I was a trainer at one of those places. All the servers I trained were trained as though they were working in a high end restaurant. In other words, they were taught how to take the orders in the proper rotation so they could remember where the food went, how to properly carry a tray, the correct side to serve and clear, and all those other little "details." No one is delivering their food for them like in a high end restaurant. In fact, half the time you are lucky if you can get someone to grab the second (and possibly third) tray to take to a big table. Those servers still need to know about the food, and in a lot of those places, computers still aren't in use, so the server is also adding up your check manually, including tax. Meanwhile if we are to believe the majority of the people on this thread, they all are exceptional almost all the time, taking a dozen tables, contacting the health department for minor violations and the rest all eat at the high end establishments paying big bucks for their meal. Personally, I don't buy it. I was a trainer at one of those "upscale family dining" places too. Yes, you train them to do everything perfectly, then toss them to the wolves. My best service... no more than 20 seats, with a staggered seating of 5 minutes between tables. You are right, more than that, and my service starts to slip. Try explaining that to people who are waiting for tables. No one wants to hear... "give us just a few minutes to seat you please." they want it now. They dont want to hear... "hi, give me just a moment to get an order in and i will be right back".. they want their service within 2 seconds of seating.... so they can say "we havent had a chance to look at the menu yet"... Its amazing how two minutes can feel like 15 when they are waiting for their server. Everyone is so impatient. I just smile, offer an appology for taking so long to approach a table (regardless of how long it took me) and proceed with my job. I have seen servers tell tables they prefer cash tips.... bad server. I have watched servers roll their eyes and get short with tables... bad server. I work with two who cant understand why they get bad tips from minority tables.... as if that doesnt explain it. These types of servers are strictly in it for the money. I want the money... but i also enjoy the job i do. There is a difference. A group of customers recently told the owner... "she has a calming presence on the floor" ... when he told me this, he laughed. back of house, i can be a real bitch and he knows it.. lol

NuevaVida -> RE: How much do you tip your waitress? (6/13/2010 8:25:13 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: barelynangel I never said she should be fired for poor service, i said i hope she was fired for what she did and to me what she did was accosted a customer. Running after a customer to say something smart and throw money at them, yeah -- sorry i don't think she should have kept her job. That's not ill will, that's having expectations that customers can walk into that establishment without worrying about being accosted by a pissed off waitress. This is starting to feel like playing the "telephone game." Nowhere in the story was it said the server chased the customer down. No where was it say that anyone "threw" money anywhere. Accosting? Really? Bad attitude, yes, but accosting?? From Butch's story: quote: Finally we got the supervisor to chase her down and she stomped to our table and slapped down the change without saying a word.

JstAnotherSub -> RE: How much do you tip your waitress? (6/13/2010 8:26:24 AM)
The fact that this thread has gone this long amazes me. It goes to show that people are passionate, which is a good thing. It has made me feel better than ever to be just a plain old folk too. Longhorns a couple times a year is my high class outing. I never got spending 300 bucks for something that would be flowing down the sewer the next day, when 30 bucks would do, but that is just me. I went out last night. Bar with a band, 5 beers, one of which I had to go to the bar and fetch cause the waitress was busy as hell. Tab from her was $12, I gave her a twenty and said keep the change. 2:30 Waffle House, which is proven to prevent any type of hangover, bill was $7 and some change, the waitress was nice as hell, and funny, I gave her $11.00. Not the uptown experience many here are talking about, but hell, I had fun, and I tipped well. All I need is someone to smile, act like they enjoy their self, and peddle as quickly as they can if it is busy, and they will get a good tip from me. As for the "we do not know how the day was for the server" thing, I would certainly not condone someone being beat by their husband, but when they are in customer service, it is not my problem. I have never been allowed to let my performance slip due to personal issues, and neither can they. I dont care if the mechanic fixing my brakes found out his old lady was fucking his cousin last night, I expect him to do the job well, and have me leave in a safe truck. I do not care if the clerk at the grocery store lost all her money playing Bingo last night, I want her to give me decent service. If a waitress is having a pissy day, she should fake being happy, like I have had to do many times in work. Once you fake it for a while, most days the smile is real before long. And, in reference to the thing with Butches mom, I agree, the 2 cents was too much. I would not have left a thing, except maybe a note letting her know that her attitude has cost her $X.XX.

barelynangel -> RE: How much do you tip your waitress? (6/13/2010 8:39:42 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: kdsub Listening to all the X servers and their comments reminded me that my mother many years ago was also a server. She is hell on wheels about service always comparing how she used to do it. One day I took my mother out to dinner. The service was terrible but it was crowded so we were still going to leave a 15% tip. When it came time to pay the bill it came to $32 or so. I gave the waitress two twenties and we waited for our change… It never came and we could not get her attention. Finally we got the supervisor to chase her down and she stomped to our table and slapped down the change without saying a word. My mother silently picked up the change… reached into her purse and took out 2 pennies and placed them on the table. As we were walking through the restaurant to the door the waitress ran up to my mom and said” here take your two cents.” My mother smiled, took the 2 pennies, and in a strong voice said” you’re right you aren’t worth two cents now get out of my way”. I love her. Butch NuevaVida I've posted the whole story. My comments about her being fired was based upon her actions of the last paragraph which was accosting a customer. And while you quoted somthing i wasn't speaking about and bolded exactly what i was, i think you wll find my statement of what i think she should have been fired for of her RUNNING UP TO BUTCHS MOM accurate. I will admit, i thought she threw the two penny's - i was wrong -- but my focus was on the fact that she actually ran up to confront a customerbut just the fact she ran up to the customer and confronted her in such a way in front of other people and customers is a firing concept to me because to me that is a waitress accosting a customer because the customer didn't tip her what she wanted or expected. You may think that is appropriate conduct of wait staff, i mean this whole thread seems to advocate wait staff is given a whole slew of excuses because "they have a hard job," yeah they do, but so do many people in the world who deal with clients and customers and most other jobs don't allow or excuse the behavior of their staff because they have a hard job and yeah, accosting a customer tends to be a firing offense. And that isn't ill will, its called expectations of treating a client appropriately. angel

heartcream -> RE: How much do you tip your waitress? (6/13/2010 8:45:26 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: barelynangel I've posted the whole story. My comments about her being fired was based upon her actions of the last paragraph. And while you quoted somthing i wasn't speaking about and bolded exactly what i was, i think you wll find my statement of what i think she should have been fired for of her RUNNING UP TO BUTCHS MOM accurate. I will admit, i thought she threw the two penny's but just the fact she ran up to the customer and confronted her in such a way in front of other people and customers is a firing concept to me because to me that is a waitress accosting a customer because the customer didn't tip her what she wanted or expected. You may think that is appropriate conduct of wait staff, i mean this whole thread seems to advocate wait staff is given a whole slew of excuses because "they have a hard job," yeah they do, but so do many people in the world who deal with clients and customers and most other jobs don't allow or excuse the behavior of their staff because they have a hard job and yeah, accosting a customer tends to be a firing offense. And that isn't ill will, its called expectations of treating a client appropriately. angel barely, you read this whole thread and this is what you got out of it? Tsk tsk. This thread is about tipping waitstaff. I think we pretty much covered all varied points and opinions around this fascinating issue. You want to start a thread on another sort of occupation YOU MAY!! It is FUN using caps!!!!!!!! You have such cute opinions let us hear MORE of them!!!

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