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Why do most people think cross-dressers are gay? - 6/6/2010 2:31:58 PM   
submale4u2spank


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Status: offline 		Why do most people think cross-dressers are gay?  I'm a cross-dresser but am completely straight, why is it that most people think if you like to wear some clothes that you are gay?  Doesn't make much sense to me.
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RE: Why do most people think cross-dressers are gay? - 6/6/2010 2:38:50 PM   
LadyCimarron


Posts: 625
Joined: 12/29/2009
Status: offline 		Stereotyping never does make sense because it is based on the faulty logic and ignorance.

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RE: Why do most people think cross-dressers are gay? - 6/6/2010 2:41:18 PM   
thishereboi


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Status: offline 		Because unfortunately some people are ignorant about the subject and rely on stereotypes for their thoughts. Others will do it because they can't see themselves doing something, so they can't understand why someone else would want to. I know it sucks, but I would be very careful about who you share this information with. Life is hard enough without people ragging on you because of your wardrobe choice.

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RE: Why do most people think cross-dressers are gay? - 6/6/2010 2:45:32 PM   
gedienstig


Posts: 155
Joined: 5/9/2010
Status: offline 		1. They don't understand cross dressing
2. They don't know anyone to disprove this theory

I must admit I fail horribly at 1., and you're the first one I've heard that is a straight cross dresser. Now, I also have that association, because I'm really not into the cross dressing community, but be glad that you've disproven the theory, and 2. has lost quite some strength already, so you've helped me get rid of my stereotype. I mean, if you're not into a certain community, you only have stereotypes to help yourself, don't blame the people, for they don't know any better .

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RE: Why do most people think cross-dressers are gay? - 6/6/2010 2:51:53 PM   
SocratesNot


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Status: offline 		I tried cross-dressing few times,and I was never attracted to men.
I am attracted to women and all the things feminine, I enjoyed imagining myself as a gorgeous women who could easily seduce many with her charms and elegance.

I don't crossdress anymore because my face is not as gentle and delicate as it was, so I would look ridiculous now if I tried it, but when I was in high school my facial features were still pretty gentle and delicate, and I could crossdress or put makeup without looking silly.

I never crossdressed in public though, because I don't identify with this. It's not part of my identity, I just did it few times as a form of exploration and it was very hot and arousing experience.


As to original question - Why do people think cross-dressers are gay?
Because a lot of cross dresseres are actually transgendered, they are really women in man's body, I they function the same way as other women, so they are attracted to men.
Most transsexuals started as crossdressers.

But yet, there is huge number of those who tried it just as a fetish or fantasy and who never felt feminine nor acted feminine in RL, nor were attracted to men.


< Message edited by SocratesNot -- 6/6/2010 2:55:17 PM >

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RE: Why do most people think cross-dressers are gay? - 6/6/2010 2:56:10 PM   
noor


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quote:

ORIGINAL: thishereboi

Because unfortunately some people are ignorant about the subject and rely on stereotypes for their thoughts. Others will do it because they can't see themselves doing something, so they can't understand why someone else would want to. I know it sucks, but I would be very careful about who you share this information with. Life is hard enough without people ragging on you because of your wardrobe choice.


this. exactly.

i think people frequently just assume anything that isn't heteronormative that doesn't fit into our ideas of what it means to be a "man" or a "woman" MUST mean you are gay. (or a pedophile. or both.) most of them know next to nothing about cross-dressing or the preferences of the people who do it. it's just a snap judgment based on their own prejudices.

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RE: Why do most people think cross-dressers are gay? - 6/6/2010 5:00:08 PM   
LadyHibiscus


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Status: offline 		And, maybe they look lousy in heels!

There's a fab local guy who has the best boot wardrobe EVAR. He doesn't dress above the waist en femme, but he does what he does because it's *transgressive*. His wife is all for it.

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RE: Why do most people think cross-dressers are gay? - 6/6/2010 6:45:27 PM   
DarkSteven


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Status: offline 		To many people, the world is hetero, with a few odd gays.  So when a man wants to look like a woman, the natural assumption is that is he wants to look like a woman, he just has a hetero woman's desires- i.e., wanting a man.



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RE: Why do most people think cross-dressers are gay? - 6/6/2010 11:54:53 PM   
SaschaMarie


Posts: 87
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From: Houston, Tx
Status: offline 		Most CD's i know are straight.

-Sascha

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RE: Why do most people think cross-dressers are gay? - 6/7/2010 12:04:25 AM   
myotherself


Posts: 7157
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It's most probably down to lack of experience in knowing anyone who is an 'out' CD.

If you look at the way gay men are portrayed on television, you'll see an inordinate amount of stereotypical assumptions as to how a gay man behaves. You'll see very feminine behaviour, make-up and cross dressing. For many people this is their only source of information on the behaviour of gay men...and so the stereotype is reinforced

So it's not so strange that this television-viewing public sees a man cross-dressing and immediately crowbars him into that 'gay man' stereotype. Very few people actually know a CD - I will admit to that myself until a year or two ago. I was fortunate to be able to spend a long time talking with a rather wonderful cross-dresser who put me straight (pun intended!) on his thoughts, feelings and needs when it came to cross-dressing.

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RE: Why do most people think cross-dressers are gay? - 6/7/2010 12:11:25 AM   
crazyml


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quote:

ORIGINAL: submale4u2spank

Why do most people think cross-dressers are gay?  I'm a cross-dresser but am completely straight, why is it that most people think if you like to wear some clothes that you are gay?  Doesn't make much sense to me.


I'm with the posters who put it down to ignorance but, to be honest, I think it is completely understandable for someone to presume that a man who dresses as a woman wants to be treated as such and to then infer that they're bi/gay. It seems to me to be a completely natural presumption to make if you don't have any other knowledge of the "scene" or the x-dressing lifestyle. And let's face it, I'd hazard that most ordinary folk don't have "validating my assumptions about the sexuality of cross-dressers" high on their to-do lists. So I don't think it's all that fair to be super critical of people who make this mistake.


In the UK I can think of two contemporary cross-dressers who are relatrively famous - Eddie Izzard (who is openly straight - I think!) and Lily Savage (Paul O'Grady - who is openly gay) so the general populace, while having been introduced to the idea that "Not all cross dressers are gay" can still be forgiven for assuming that there's a pretty good likelihood that they are.

I did a casual check of the "trans" category. Now "trans" is  this site's catch-all for CD/Trans/Shemale etc etc so it's mixing sub categories, but of the profiles I looked at (16 before I got bored) 5 identified as straight, and 11 identified as bi or gay. Now this superficial analysis is deeply flawed -

  • It doesn't account for people who don't identify as "trans" but who like cross dressing
  • We might assume that straight CD's may not be as likely to sign up to CM
  • Some CD may not list "crossdressing" in their likes.
That said - superficially, and assuming a certain level of ignorance - it wouldn't be absurd to assume that a majority of cross-dressers are gay/bi.


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RE: Why do most people think cross-dressers are gay? - 6/7/2010 12:14:06 AM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline 		May I recommend to the close minded folks.. THIS

Eddie RAWKS!

:) 

And I echo what thishereboi says....

ETA: DAMN you, ML.. for that post while I was ogling...errmmmm searching Eddies site... 

< Message edited by GreedyTop -- 6/7/2010 12:17:54 AM >

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RE: Why do most people think cross-dressers are gay? - 6/7/2010 12:39:31 AM   
EvilEyes269


Posts: 4
Joined: 7/27/2009
Status: offline 		I'm a full-time TV (since Feb 2008) and I'm both straight AND Domme which breaks another stereotype. I'm full-time TV in that I'm planning on becoming a TS but haven't yet been prescribed hormones. I expect that once I'm on the hormones then I'll start to find men attractive which is fair enough but I hope I don't lose my attraction to women as well.

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RE: Why do most people think cross-dressers are gay? - 6/7/2010 2:22:38 AM   
ShoreBound149


Posts: 622
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Status: offline 		It seems reasonable to me that there would a strong connection between a male dressing fully as a woman and also enjoying sucking cock.

I don't win every bet but........If you lined up 100 random crossdressers......I would bet 51 or greater have sucked a cock.

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RE: Why do most people think cross-dressers are gay? - 6/7/2010 7:22:07 AM   
pahunkboy


Posts: 33061
Joined: 2/26/2006
From: Central Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		-- I have to stop wearing pink.   When I am outside- guys driving by look at me.   Like pink could be a woman- and anything in pink could be fucked.

I get nearly all my clothes 2nd hand.    I look for fiber content and fit.

So wear pink = a man looks- who is at fault?

The wearer is for false advertising.

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RE: Why do most people think cross-dressers are gay? - 6/7/2010 7:25:50 AM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		Probably because when you see in media males dressing like females, they're drag queens who are gay, and not straight men.
Ru Paul anyone?

"To Wang Foo Thanks for Everything, Julie Newmar" is a case in point. Fab movie, btw




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RE: Why do most people think cross-dressers are gay? - 6/7/2010 7:37:06 AM   
pahunkboy


Posts: 33061
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From: Central Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		-- then men in ear rings- and those kilts.

If I want prissy- I would get a woman.

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RE: Why do most people think cross-dressers are gay? - 6/7/2010 8:11:06 AM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
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quote:

ORIGINAL: pahunkboy

-- I have to stop wearing pink.   When I am outside- guys driving by look at me.   Like pink could be a woman- and anything in pink could be fucked.

I get nearly all my clothes 2nd hand.    I look for fiber content and fit.

So wear pink = a man looks- who is at fault?

The wearer is for false advertising.



Unless you ride a horse. Tough enough to wear pink is a common theme at rodeos, proceeds go to breast cancer research.


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RE: Why do most people think cross-dressers are gay? - 6/7/2010 8:12:15 AM   
pahunkboy


Posts: 33061
Joined: 2/26/2006
From: Central Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		All I know is that males look at me more if I wear pink.  I live on a busy street and am out alot in the yard.

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RE: Why do most people think cross-dressers are gay? - 6/7/2010 8:21:30 AM   
MadameMarque


Posts: 1128
Joined: 3/19/2005
Status: offline 		Yeah, because males dressing in drag are associated with gay drag queens, and because for a male to be feminized is also often associated with gay guys gender bending.

I think it's making some unfair assumptions (speaking of unfair assumptions) to assume that a person who's unfamiliar with some aspect of sexuality is therefore close-minded and persecutory toward it.

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

Probably because when you see in media males dressing like females, they're drag queens who are gay, and not straight men.
Ru Paul anyone?

"To Wang Foo Thanks for Everything, Julie Newmar" is a case in point. Fab movie, btw




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