D/s vs. M/s ?

D/s vs. M/s ? (Full Version)

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SocratesNot -> D/s vs. M/s ? (6/9/2010 8:17:02 AM)
What is the difference between M/s and D/s, in case that D/s is also long term, committed , 24/7 relationship and that dominant and submissive live together?

Jeffff -> RE: D/s vs. M/s ? (6/9/2010 8:17:54 AM)
Quite often it is semantics.

leadership527 -> RE: D/s vs. M/s ? (6/9/2010 8:23:05 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SocratesNot What is the difference between M/s and D/s, in case that D/s is also long term, 24/7 and that dominant and submissive live together ? sighs There is no answer to that question SN. I can tell you what I perceive the difference to be. Other's can tell you what THEY perceive the difference to be. Few of us would agree with each other. In really broad brush strokes people will generally feel that one or both of these statements are true: In general, there is some implied increase in scope of authority wielded by the dominant partner. The specific nature of that "increased scope of authority" is only going to be relevant to the couple involved. In other words, the thing that I consider "total obedience" in Carol someone else might look at and think "wow, that's nothing." There may be an ownership dynamic involved. Consider that it is perfectly possible to wield a great deal of authority without also feeling some sense of ownership. I could tell you what it means to me.. but you've already read enough of my posts to know that.

peppermint -> RE: D/s vs. M/s ? (6/9/2010 8:28:59 AM)
The difference is the letters used to describe the relationship and the meaning the two people put on those letters.

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: D/s vs. M/s ? (6/9/2010 8:37:44 AM)
http://www.collarchat.com/m_605383/mpage_1/key_master%252Cdom/tm.htm#606932 Ms vs Ds http://www.collarchat.com/m_794045/mpage_2/key_kinky/tm.htm#794460 Ds vs bdsm http://www.collarchat.com/m_486719/mpage_1/key_master%252Cdom/tm.htm#486891 from dom to master http://www.collarchat.com/m_271859/mpage_2/key_master%252Cdom/tm.htm#272880 dom or master Master vs Dom http://www.collarchat.com/m_629559/mpage_1/key_sub%252Cslave/tm.htm#629565 What's the difference between a slave and a submissive? http://www.collarchat.com/m_616573/mpage_1/key_bdsm/tm.htm#616591 Ds as bdsm http://www.collarchat.com/m_586226/mpage_1/key_slave%252Csub/tm.htm#586267 Curious, sub v slave? http://www.collarchat.com/m_515303/mpage_1/key_slave/tm.htm#515333 What is the difference? http://www.collarchat.com/m_308296/mpage_1/key_slave%252Csub/tm.htm#309867 sub or slave? http://www.collarchat.com/m_342405/mpage_1/key_slave%252Csub/tm.htm#342794 ~slave vs sub~ http://www.collarchat.com/m_410567/mpage_1/key_slave%252Csub/tm.htm#410982 slave or sub http://www.collarchat.com/m_497775/mpage_1/key_submissive%252Cslave/tm.htm#497977 I'm new to this but... http://www.collarchat.com/m_366860/mpage_1/key_slave%252Csub/tm.htm#366893 Difference bet/submission and slave? http://www.collarchat.com/m_365776/mpage_1/key_sub%252Cslave/tm.htm#366767 slub question http://www.collarchat.com/m_281198/mpage_1/key_slave%252Csub/tm.htm#281512 difference between slave and submissive http://www.collarchat.com/m_251014/mpage_1/key_sub%252Cslave/tm.htm#251062 definition of "slave" What's the difference between slaves and submissives? Submissive or slave? Slaves versus submissive Submissive or slave? (2) Submissive vs slave (2)

Rochsub2009 -> RE: D/s vs. M/s ? (6/9/2010 8:39:34 AM)
SN, When are you going to realize that terminology is really meaningless? At least when it comes to the level of specificity and definitiveness that you seem to be seeking. Every dynamic is different. Each couple will interact differently. They will define their M/s or D/s differently. Rather than focusing so much on terminology and the theoretical, why not just go out and find the type of relationship that YOU want. Who cares how anyone else defines a term, or how anyone else orchestrates their relationship?

subtee -> RE: D/s vs. M/s ? (6/9/2010 8:39:45 AM)
Oh right ON! It's the LA post we know and love!!! And sooooo very appropriate. Woo hoo!

mnottertail -> RE: D/s vs. M/s ? (6/9/2010 8:41:28 AM)
LS/MFT

Aileen1968 -> RE: D/s vs. M/s ? (6/9/2010 8:42:15 AM)
BLT (I'm hungry)

subtee -> RE: D/s vs. M/s ? (6/9/2010 8:42:42 AM)
m & ms

VaguelyCurious -> RE: D/s vs. M/s ? (6/9/2010 8:49:56 AM)
SN You remind me of a teacher I had at school when I was about fifteen. She came from a contemporary dance background, and she was taking salsa lessons. (Aside: most trained dancers take to salsa really well. For some reason she was a massive exception). She kept going on about how the naming of the moves wasn't systematic-different classes call different steps by different names. She couldn't see past that in order to learn how to just dance-you don't need to know the name of a move to follow it, you don't have to call it the same thing anyone else does-you just have to learn to move sensuously and gracefully and with rhythmn and a sensitivity to your partner-then everything else just sorts itself out. Quit attempting to come up with a notation system. Quit trying to learn the names of all the moves before you've gone through the steps. For fucks sake, just get on your feet and dance! I suspect that none of this will ever make sense from the sides of the dancefloor-sometimes you have to to get a feel for the moves before you can really discuss them... Edited because I forgot to add the actual reason you remind me of her: I was a pretty good dancer by then. She used to harass me after every games class about the specifics of some move or other. It never got her anywhere, because what she was asking was not what she actually needed to know, and it frustrated me no end. That's what you're doing here. None of the questions you ask here will ever get you the knowledge you need.

SocratesNot -> RE: D/s vs. M/s ? (6/9/2010 8:57:57 AM)
OK, I'll tell you my opinion. In 24/7 D/s the submissive is totally obedient to the dominant in areas of working for the dominant, all types of BDSM scenes, running errands, being controlled sexually, all that has to do with sexuality, doing household chores, etc. but he is still a person for himself who has right to know all about the relationship, all about the intentions of the dominant, and has the right to pursue all of his goals and aspirations. For example - he may be kept in chastity, he will cook for her, he will give her massages, she can tie him up and spank him whenever she wants, she can do all sorts of sadomasochistic play with him, he will cater to all her whims and desires, he will repair her car, he will drive her wherever she wants to go etc, he will run errands for her, but once he does all of this HE IS COMPLETELY FREE TO DO WHATEVER HE WANTS AND TO PURSUE ALL OF HIS ASPIRATIONS, DREAMS, CAREER AND HOBBIES. She will NOT try to forcefully change his religious and political beliefs. She will NOT tell him what books to read, what music to listen to and what intellectual pursuits to engage in. She can suggest it, she can even demand it temporary as a form of play, but in long term he will always be free to engage his mind with anything he wants. Complete freedom of information, religious and political beliefs, spirituality and philosophy. He is the one who determines his identity. So, this is D/s in my opinion. This is type of relationship that I could be in, as a sub, with the right Domme. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- In M/s, on the other hand - in theory, slave must do anything Master demands, and must ask for permission to do anything he wants himself. The permission can be given or not. Also, the slave doesn't have any rights unless Master decides that he has, and Master can control all slave's intellectual, religious, and other pursuits. So, slave's only IDENTITY is the identity that Master gives him. This may be almost the same as his own, natural identity, or totally different - but this is up to Master. In some cases the slave would benefit from total change of identity (if he was pretty much fucked up in the beginning, so any change would be for the better, even if it is totally radical), in some other cases (if the slave has strong and established identity and is very productive and independent before even entering relationship), radical changes of slave's identity and life philosophy would be detrimental to him. In such relationship I wouldn't be able to be, because I have too strong opinions and beliefs, and life philosophy and I wouldn't allow someone to change them and mold them. I also have very strong aspirations to achieve certain things in my life, and I wouldn't like anyone to try to prevent me in doing so.

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: D/s vs. M/s ? (6/9/2010 9:02:15 AM)
Socrates your answer is completely false. I could set you up with dinner with dozens of Ds and Ms couples who are nothing like that. One thing you should realize that it's nothing to do with the act, the specific acts, the specific orders. Ms dynamics LOOK like vanilla ones 90% of the time. And until you read through all of those links I sent you, it's obvious you don't really care about forming a solid answer, you just want to set yourself up so you can answer your question and give praise to any fem sub who gives a flowery personal depiction of their lives.

VideoAdminZeta -> RE: D/s vs. M/s ? (6/9/2010 9:02:42 AM)
From the Forum Guidelines: quote: General BDSM - Genuine and more serious discussion of BDSM. This is NOT a garbage pail or a catch all forum. Polls and Other Random Stupidity - Your garbage pail for all the junk you need to get out of your system (yes, general forum content guidelines still apply).

SocratesNot -> RE: D/s vs. M/s ? (6/9/2010 9:09:53 AM)
quote: Socrates your answer is completely false. I could set you up with dinner with dozens of Ds and Ms couples who are nothing like that. One thing you should realize that it's nothing to do with the act, the specific acts, the specific orders. Ms dynamics LOOK like vanilla ones 90% of the time. And until you read through all of those links I sent you, it's obvious you don't really care about forming a solid answer, you just want to set yourself up so you can answer your question and give praise to any fem sub who gives a flowery personal depiction of their lives. You identify as a switch. This is two steps away from slave. So in your dynamic, this is probably not like with those who identify as slaves. I could name at least 4-5 women who would agree to a certain extent with my description.

Jeffff -> RE: D/s vs. M/s ? (6/9/2010 9:11:19 AM)
There you go again dude.

porcelaine -> RE: D/s vs. M/s ? (6/9/2010 9:12:09 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SocratesNot What is the difference between M/s and D/s, in case that D/s is also long term, committed , 24/7 relationship and that dominant and submissive live together? D/s - Submission on my terms M/s - A dynamic built upon his. D/s - The possibility of wiggle room M/s - Next question Caveats... D/s - Sensible people get into relationships with mutually acceptable terms negating the first definition. M/s - Refer to the above. Insert the option to add to or delete according to his preferences for the dominant. ~porcelaine

SocratesNot -> RE: D/s vs. M/s ? (6/9/2010 9:13:59 AM)
BTW, thanks for the links that you provided, I will read some of that, and I hope I'll get some more insight.

FelineFae -> RE: D/s vs. M/s ? (6/9/2010 9:20:12 AM)
24/7 slave here. Master is a busy man. He does not have to time to consantly give or deny permission for my every little action. Since we have been together for ten years, i generally know what he would or would not approve of. i do my best to be obedient to his will. He likes it this way. LA has stated a fact, while you give opinions.

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: D/s vs. M/s ? (6/9/2010 9:20:17 AM)
quote: You identify as a switch. This is two steps away from slave. So in your dynamic, this is probably not like with those who identify as slaves. I could name at least 4-5 women who would agree to a certain extent with my description. LOL once again proving how clueless you are.

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