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RE: questions about mentoring - 4/12/2006 9:58:02 PM

Evanesce

Posts: 2325
Joined: 9/14/2005
Status: offline

quote:

then say youre not what we want and stop talking to him

I have to agree with Feline here. Dump the guy, because even if he, by some weird twist of fate, actually DID try to "help" your boyfriend, it would only be with the ulterior motive of getting into your pants. That's what's driving him - not a desire to actually help someone else.

An ethical mentor isn't going to be waiting outside the door for your man to get a boner and then come join you. An ethical mentor isn't going to be interested in sex with you, with OR without your boyfriend. An ethical mentor is going to be concerned with helping BOTH of you figure out where you are on the BDSM playing field, what your positions are, how your boyfriend can become the Dom you want, and how you can become the submissive or slave you wish to be. They're there to guide you, not f*** you. And anyone who says differently is someone on whom you should not waste your time.

_____________________________

Denise

Give a slave what he truly needs, and he will do what you want.

"There's never a hero in a battle of ego." - Big & Rich

(in reply to FelinePersuasion)

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RE: questions about mentoring - 4/12/2006 10:16:06 PM

enthralled

Posts: 249
Joined: 9/13/2005
From: Nashville, Tn
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MHOO314

Mentors do NOT engage in sexual or intimate activities with their students or their students "others"--its an unwritten but adhered to rule---nor is it necessary to meet with you "three meetings"alone---and straight to the bedroom?

I think you know the answer already.

Now if you think you need a mentor, the relationship needs to be developed with your bf not you--and if you think there are tons of wannabes out there, there are a hell of a lot more that call themselves "mentors".

This is how I was mentored so I totally agree! I was taught that mentoring had nothing to do with sex so I'm confused as to WHY in the world your boyfriend would have to get an erection to be mentored????

quote:

(MasterJohn)
Mentor: Webster's definition is a wise advisor, teacher or coach.

(MasterJohn)
In the BDSM formal lifestyle, a mentor is usually one who answers the questions of a sub in training

(MasterJohn)
A mentor is usually used hand-in-hand with a trainer where the mentor is usually the friend/confidant of the sub/slave/student

(MasterJohn)
A mentor usually does not work a sub/slave/student although that is a negotiation between the student/sub/slave and a mentor and/or Master

(MasterJohn)
Unfortunately, the advent of the multimedia online has confused and blurred the definitions of mentor and trainer

taken from http://castlerealm.com/library/masterjohn.shtml

Respectfully,
enthralled

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A man never discloses his own character so clearly as when he describes another's.-Jean Paul Richter

(in reply to MHOO314)

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Post #: 22