RE: Have you ever had a relationship w a sub end

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RE: Have you ever had a relationship w a sub end - 9/13/2010 5:18:28 PM

DaddyDeviance

Posts: 9
Joined: 11/1/2009
Status: offline

Yes indeedy...when i was newer to BDSM, young and reckless. Pretty much what was previously described here. The "honeymoon" was over after the discovery/fixing/exploring stage was complete. Limits were well defined, both hard and soft. Nothing was really left to discover together. This happened several times over. Now, many years later, older and wiser, I know what went wrong. BDSM is simply a means to an end. Whether vanilla or BDSM oriented, a couple must match on many more levels or they are living on borrowed time. Young horny dominant guy has given way to older, wiser, likes to explore many other things together dominant guy. In a nutshell, that was it time and time again...lack of compatibility on many more levels other than BDSM.

(in reply to Nineveh)

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RE: Have you ever had a relationship w a sub end - 9/14/2010 8:59:38 AM

ResidentSadist

Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline

I have never found any hard limits . . . but I was always using BDSM to explore the limits of love, not using love to explore the limits of BDSM. I always found we were both capable of anything. It is not the leather itself that excites me or my partners, it is who and how the leather is used. I consider BDSM a relationship style, a lifestyle. Leather is only the tool by which BDSM relationships are forged and limits expanded open to the frontiers of passion. When that bond is strong, I have found there are no limits . . . not legal, socially moral or otherwise.

For me the fun and excitement come from the people involved, from who is behind the leather not just what it is you are doing with the leather. If it is only the leather that turns you on, then you don't need a Dom, go hump a whip or flog yourself. If it is only the exploring the limits of your perversions that turn you on and not the exploration of each other, then you don't need a relationship or a Dom. You can go to the local dungeon and play with Tops to explore your limits . . . or spend just one weekend at my house, I promise to violate all your limits at once.

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I give good thread.

(in reply to DaddyDeviance)

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RE: Have you ever had a relationship w a sub end - 9/14/2010 9:23:52 AM

sexyred1

Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline

No, I have never had a relationship with a Dom end due to sex or kink. In fact, they lasted too long because of the never ending nature of what we did.

Things ended in the relationship because there was a lack of caring and overall compatibility, never reaching the end of our BDSM ropes.

(in reply to ResidentSadist)

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Post #: 23