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RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 6/16/2006 9:07:50 PM   
missgiveNTake


Posts: 673
Joined: 3/22/2006
Status: offline 		Go pick up some Orsen Wells tapes.

My staple gun  clogged with blood and skin, how do I get it unjammed?

_____________________________

I am a very good girl, very good at all I do.

Highly intelligent with a generous pinch of the absurd! (Thank you Crouchingtigress)

(in reply to gooddogbenji)
Profile   Post #: 1201
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 6/16/2006 10:22:20 PM   
Bluebird


Posts: 384
Joined: 2/17/2006
From: Las Vegas
Status: offline 		Soak it in peroxide.
 
And Benji, umm, have you never heard of spanking the monkey?
 
How do I get the image of Benji's wiggling leg out of my brain now?

_____________________________

Love is patient, love is kind. I am neither. Get over it.

(in reply to missgiveNTake)
Profile   Post #: 1202
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 6/17/2006 12:55:03 PM   
wandersalone


Posts: 4666
Joined: 11/21/2005
Status: offline 		How do I get the image of Benji's wiggling leg out of my brain now?
.... Bluebird, I don't want you in any circumstances to think of pink elephants at all!!!!!!.... hehehehe now no more benji in your brain


How can I get rich and famous really quickly without going to jail and not having any special talents?

edited to add the damn picture of the elephant

< Message edited by wandersalone -- 6/17/2006 1:01:47 PM >

(in reply to Bluebird)
Profile   Post #: 1203
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 6/17/2006 6:24:27 PM   
Gauge


Posts: 5689
Joined: 6/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

How can I get rich and famous really quickly without going to jail and not having any special talents?


Become President of the United States.


I took a long nap this afternoon and I am nowhere close to being tired. What can I do to tire myself out?

_____________________________

"For there is no folly of the beast of the earth which is not infinitely outdone by the madness of men." Herman Melville - Moby Dick

I'm wearing my chicken suit and humming La Marseillaise.

(in reply to wandersalone)
Profile   Post #: 1204
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 6/17/2006 6:29:36 PM   
HouseofBear


Posts: 1280
Joined: 2/9/2005
Status: offline 		Run around your house at top speed 100 times nekkid.  If not tired, repeat until you drop.

Ok, now I have this weird image of Gauge running nekkid around his house stuck in my head.  I need some better entertainment.  What would be interesting tonight?

(in reply to Gauge)
Profile   Post #: 1205
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 6/17/2006 10:08:15 PM   
crouchingtigress


Posts: 4387
Joined: 3/19/2006
From: Maui
Status: offline 		I have found really good entertainment is to imagine guage naked with groucho marx glasses on and holding a bullwhip.....
 
 
i have fallen and i cant get up....

(in reply to HouseofBear)
Profile   Post #: 1206
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 6/17/2006 10:13:19 PM   
missalice


Posts: 38
Joined: 5/21/2006
Status: offline 		roll downstairs. roll!

.... i'm obsessed with vin deisel and i can't stop watching the Chronicles of Riddick.. again and again and again

(in reply to crouchingtigress)
Profile   Post #: 1207
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 6/18/2006 3:20:15 AM   
LaMalinche


Posts: 2077
Joined: 10/20/2005
Status: offline 		Sell all of your possessions, and move to where ever he is.  Stalk him.  You are a Domme, so make him yours by what ever method that you have to.  He will submit to you in the end. 

One of my co-workers has not been showering, what should I do?



_____________________________

Over the centuries, mankind has tried many ways of combating the forces of evil... prayer, fasting, good works and so on. Up until Doom, no one seemed to have thought about the double-barrel shotgun. Eat leaden death, demon...

(in reply to missalice)
Profile   Post #: 1208
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 6/18/2006 5:39:50 AM   
wandersalone


Posts: 4666
Joined: 11/21/2005
Status: offline 		get a nose job and hope the surgeon botches it and severs the nerves that affect your sense of smell

I bought a new handbag yesterday, what shall I do with the 286 unused ones in my cupboard?



(in reply to LaMalinche)
Profile   Post #: 1209
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 6/18/2006 7:50:39 AM   
Kindred2Evil


Posts: 227
Joined: 4/16/2005
Status: offline 		Find a Domme or Dom who loves handbags and send them all to her *coughs over here*

My kittens have turned into miniature evil beings who are intent on destroying my puzzle that is FINALLY put together...what should I do??

_____________________________

Her touch is on the breeze that brushes your cheek, Her voice rides the thunder as the storm breaks, Her tears will clean your heartache when the rains come, Her sun will light the darkest times when you feel alone...She is the Goddess.

(in reply to wandersalone)
Profile   Post #: 1210
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 6/18/2006 8:46:33 AM   
LaMalinche


Posts: 2077
Joined: 10/20/2005
Status: offline 		101 ways to WOK your kitten.

Cat. . . It is the other white meat.

I cannot find 75 East. . . Can someone help me?



_____________________________

Over the centuries, mankind has tried many ways of combating the forces of evil... prayer, fasting, good works and so on. Up until Doom, no one seemed to have thought about the double-barrel shotgun. Eat leaden death, demon...

(in reply to Kindred2Evil)
Profile   Post #: 1211
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 6/18/2006 2:02:57 PM   
crouchingtigress


Posts: 4387
Joined: 3/19/2006
From: Maui
Status: offline 		ask the drug dealers and pimps  on the corner.....oh and wear something skimpy.....


there is a box of ring dings in my closet that are seducing me......but i want to stay faithfull to the hard boiled eggs and carrots i was going to eat what shaould i do

(in reply to LaMalinche)
Profile   Post #: 1212
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 6/18/2006 11:07:47 PM   
missgiveNTake


Posts: 673
Joined: 3/22/2006
Status: offline 		Stick them all in the blender together, that way you will only be unfaithful 1/3 of the time.

There is a drought starting. How do I help conserve water?

_____________________________

I am a very good girl, very good at all I do.

Highly intelligent with a generous pinch of the absurd! (Thank you Crouchingtigress)

(in reply to crouchingtigress)
Profile   Post #: 1213
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 6/18/2006 11:30:37 PM   
crouchingtigress


Posts: 4387
Joined: 3/19/2006
From: Maui
Status: offline 		dont pee....hold it in.

my feet itch


(in reply to missgiveNTake)
Profile   Post #: 1214
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 6/19/2006 6:37:04 AM   
wandersalone


Posts: 4666
Joined: 11/21/2005
Status: offline 		rub poison ivy on your breasts and then you will forget about your feet itching (thanking whoever had written about poison ivy on another thread)

I think I have made plans with too many people for this weekend and am not sure who should get the flick?


(in reply to crouchingtigress)
Profile   Post #: 1215
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 6/19/2006 11:06:49 AM   
missgiveNTake


Posts: 673
Joined: 3/22/2006
Status: offline 		Just ignore all plans you made and do your own thing. No one will mind.

My hearing aid batteries are dead, how can I get more without having to go to the store?

_____________________________

I am a very good girl, very good at all I do.

Highly intelligent with a generous pinch of the absurd! (Thank you Crouchingtigress)

(in reply to wandersalone)
Profile   Post #: 1216
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 6/19/2006 1:19:34 PM   
bancheeEB


Posts: 266
Joined: 7/25/2004
From: Californication
Status: offline 		Turn up your stereo and television insanely loud so that it irritates the neighbors and they will gladly retrive you some.

I would really like a nap but have a ton of chores to get done... what should I do?


_____________________________

Banchee
~Live with intention~ Walk to the edge~ Listen hard~ Practice wellness~ Play with abandon~ Laugh~ Choose without regret~ Continue to learn~ Appreciate your friends~ Do what you love~ Live as if this is all there is~
~S~S~C~

(in reply to missgiveNTake)
Profile   Post #: 1217
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 6/19/2006 1:33:23 PM   
Vendaval


Posts: 10297
Joined: 1/15/2005
Status: offline 		Have the house boy do the chores and the house girl give you a
manicure, pedicure and massage before your nap.  Use her soft
breasts as your pillow.
 
I want to go watch "The Omen" and take a scardy-cat friend along
just to watch her squirm.  What bribes should I use to accomplish
this objective?
 
Vendava
 
 

_____________________________

"Beware, the woods at night, beware the lunar light.
So in this gray haze we'll be meating again, and on that
great day, I will tease you all the same."
"WOLF MOON", OCTOBER RUST, TYPE O NEGATIVE


http://KinkMeet.co.uk

(in reply to bancheeEB)
Profile   Post #: 1218
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 6/20/2006 1:42:55 AM   
wandersalone


Posts: 4666
Joined: 11/21/2005
Status: offline 		Tell her you are both going to see the top secret world premiere of a  remake of The Titanic because you know how much she loves soppy romantic films and act really surprised that the bastards changed the film

I wore my jumper back to front to work today (honestly!) how can I stop everyone from teasing me about this tomorrow?

< Message edited by wandersalone -- 6/20/2006 2:08:51 AM >

(in reply to Vendaval)
Profile   Post #: 1219
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 6/20/2006 10:09:30 AM   
Gauge


Posts: 5689
Joined: 6/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

I wore my jumper back to front to work today (honestly!) how can I stop everyone from teasing me about this tomorrow?


Well, there are a few ways to do this. One would be to wear your slacks backwards tomorrow. The other would be to call a few dozen friends to come to work with you and have all of them wear their jumpers backwards and claim that it is a new fashion style or finally, what the hell do you think pipe bombs are for?


I am afraid that wandersalone might actually follow my advice. What can I do to reassure myself?

_____________________________

"For there is no folly of the beast of the earth which is not infinitely outdone by the madness of men." Herman Melville - Moby Dick

I'm wearing my chicken suit and humming La Marseillaise.

(in reply to wandersalone)
Profile   Post #: 1220
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