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RE: Fake Domme & Tactics of a Con: A cautionary - 6/25/2010 5:23:53 PM   
IronBear


Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline 		To the OP:

Unless you have the financial resources, man power and the legal credibility of the FBI and Interpol combined to track this scammer and the balls to terminate him or her, you at the best, dedicating yourself to bitterness and disappointment and at the worst (if you do get close enough to expose the person's name), a reserved place in the city morgue and an appointment of the ME. The best advise you have been given, is to walk away and move forward to start living life.,


_____________________________

Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Fake Domme & Tactics of a Con: A cautionary - 6/25/2010 5:26:25 PM   
Sleeper233


Posts: 6
Joined: 6/13/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

I don't get it, Lockit. I happens SO often to men who genuinely have common sense in other areas!


It's no mystery really. In my case it was a combination of boredom, loneliness, bitterness, sadness and desperation. Pathetic? yes but I don't think that excuses fraud.

And yes to prior posters I know that may make me a target but I'm deleting my profile after this so whatever.

So feel free to call me out as an idiot and say that I don't deserve sympathy (even though I said twice that I'm NOT looking for sympathy) to your hearts desire because frankly I won't be fucking here anymore to hear it.

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Fake Domme & Tactics of a Con: A cautionary - 6/25/2010 5:27:24 PM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		It's too bad that you won't be here---since THIS is where the real people who are having actual LIVES that involve BDSM are. NOT in some online camfest.

_____________________________

[page 23 girl]



(in reply to Sleeper233)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Fake Domme & Tactics of a Con: A cautionary - 6/25/2010 5:29:17 PM   
divi


Posts: 11109
Joined: 9/4/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sleeper233


My mission on this site is no longer to meet anyone but to expose this person for the fraud that they are.



Wow so this is your mission? Seriously ? Wow, I guess you did say it * you're stupid. Good luck on this dangerous crusade you will embark on.. be safe
* eyeroll *

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( imho )

I really could use a wish right now

(in reply to Sleeper233)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Fake Domme & Tactics of a Con: A cautionary - 6/25/2010 5:29:30 PM   
laurell3


Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sleeper233

quote:

ORIGINAL: MissAsylum

i have no sympathy.

NONE.

they even have on the site before you send a message a SCAM warning.

you ignored it. your fault.

unfortunately- the same post will be up in 3 or 4 days.


Fine, I didn't ask for any sympathy, as I stated in a previous post. I don't know why some of you aren't getting that.

I beat the shit out of myself verbally over this and I'll be the first to admit that I was stupid. So why did I bother with this post, to alert people to a far more elaborate scam than the kind the warnings addressed - I am simply calling attention to this fact & I frankly don't give two shits how it makes me look going forward because I don't plan on using this site ever again.

Not everyone is savvy when it comes to this sort of thing & I frankly don't see why people have a problem with this sort of post & I couldn't care less how often you see such posts - the very fact that such posts are so common is troubling.






Well you could take that approach. Or you could calm the fuck down and realize that the people here have experience and knowlege which could benefit you and help you navigate your way through the minefield that is attempting to find a partner. There are many people here that would go out of their way to help you with that. Instead of throwing a tantrum, read the threads here and the advice given. Your quick dismissal of this site is unwarranted. Yes, there is fraud on the internet. No, it's not the site's fault, nor will they ever be able to totally keep it from occurring.

Stop focusing on one negative and come up with a plan to avoid that and learn. I would suggest the people on this forum that you are going off on could be a very valuable asset to you.

< Message edited by laurell3 -- 6/25/2010 5:35:20 PM >

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to Sleeper233)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Fake Domme & Tactics of a Con: A cautionary - 6/25/2010 5:29:58 PM   
LadyAngelika


Posts: 8070
Joined: 7/4/2004
Status: offline
quote:

In my case it was a combination of boredom, loneliness, bitterness, sadness and desperation.


And I say this with compassion, your energy is probably better focused on dealing with these issues than chasing down some online fantasy Domme. She won't fill the void you need to fill. Only you can learn to fill your own void.

- LA

_____________________________

Une main de fer dans un gant de velours ~ An iron hand in a velvet glove

(in reply to Sleeper233)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Fake Domme & Tactics of a Con: A cautionary - 6/25/2010 5:30:52 PM   
xxblushesxx


Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline 		Well, I tell ya, I have sympathy for ya.

I'm very sorry this happened to you, and can see how it can. Some of the scammers are very sophisticated.

I "play" a domme on the phone and on the internet. If I wanted to, I could use boards such as this to lure people in, and use their needs against them. I choose not to.

I am a real person and know how to "play" one. Most of the men who call me believe I am exactly who I say I am. (I play many different characters) It's really not that difficult, especially if you identify with the different "characters" you play.

So, be careful. Talk to the person on the phone fairly soon, and get to meet them within a month or three. Watch out for the warning signals which tell you this may not be real.

Best to you and to all who are searching,

_____________________________

~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com


(in reply to Sleeper233)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Fake Domme & Tactics of a Con: A cautionary - 6/25/2010 5:32:32 PM   
MissAsylum


Posts: 1863
Joined: 1/9/2009
Status: offline 		and all of us are calling attention to the fact that there is a WARNING displayed BEFORE you send a message. I included it in this post.

i understand you are frustrated, but don't turn your frustration to the people giving you feedback. 

And please! Don't do us any favours by sticking around. 






Attachment (1)

_____________________________

I hate when I'm wearing my apple bottom jeans, but i can't find my boots with the fur.

(in reply to Sleeper233)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Fake Domme & Tactics of a Con: A cautionary - 6/25/2010 5:32:36 PM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sleeper233

It's no mystery really. In my case it was a combination of boredom, loneliness, bitterness, sadness and desperation. Pathetic? yes but I don't think that excuses fraud.

And yes to prior posters I know that may make me a target but I'm deleting my profile after this so whatever.

So feel free to call me out as an idiot and say that I don't deserve sympathy (even though I said twice that I'm NOT looking for sympathy) to your hearts desire because frankly I won't be fucking here anymore to hear it.


Nor does your personal and emotional place in life excuse a lack of taking accountability and blaming the other guy. This is yours to digest, own and deal with. The world isn't a Polly Anna place where all is good and well. You can excuse your part in this with your choice to be as you are but what good will it do you? You want the world of scam/fraud to change, but the major change you need to focus on is how you are dealing with life. Start with you and then try to save the world.


_____________________________

No matter how old a woman gets, some men will think she was born yesterday! ROFL... I love this place!


(in reply to Sleeper233)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Fake Domme & Tactics of a Con: A cautionary - 6/25/2010 5:33:47 PM   
divi


Posts: 11109
Joined: 9/4/2007
Status: offline 		Sorry dude, not gonna color coat it .. was a dumb move on your part. Smarten up

_____________________________

( imho )

I really could use a wish right now

(in reply to Lockit)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Fake Domme & Tactics of a Con: A cautionary - 6/25/2010 5:56:26 PM   
angelikaJ


Posts: 8641
Joined: 6/22/2007
Status: offline 		I understand the OPs frustration, I think.

He came to post an email that he hoped would be a helpful warning to other men who might fall for the same or similar scam and he got dumped on for whining about being a victim.

Actually, I am seeng  a lot less victimhood here than in many similar posts.
He acknowledged his mistakes.

People can discuss what an idiot he is if they choose but tomorrow or next week someone else is going to post something similar and get jumped on all over again.

There are a lot of very lonely men/women who come to CM.
Loneliness often begets desperation.

We see it here call men pathetic.
We see it call it sub-frenzy and again reprimand women for leaping before looking.

These are human beings.
And when they begin to get bitter and jaded we tell them that is wrong too.

And somewhere along the line our life experience has given us permission to mock and make fun of and "tell it like it is".

This is sounding like an accusation because of the way it is phrased in generalized terms and really it isn't meant to sound that way.
If I were to do the wise thing, I would copy and save it until I can get my emotions under control and phrase it using "I statements" it might be received better.

If I were to do that I would lose my nerve and never post this.

This is not an accusation.
I would just like to better understand something that I have no real comprehension of.

_____________________________

The original home of the caffeinated psychotic hair pixies.
(as deemed by He who owns me)

http://www.collarchat.com/m_3234821/tm.htm

30 fluffy points!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mQjuCQd01sg

(in reply to LadyAngelika)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Fake Domme & Tactics of a Con: A cautionary - 6/25/2010 6:02:33 PM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		Angelika, you have a loving heart.

I wish that *I* could understand the urges that make people throw MONIES at people on the internet. I made a deeply disastrous life choice once that I am lucky to have walked away from. I did it in the name of loneliness and desperation. But it was a realtime thing, involving a real human being. I cannot fathom the level of hope that says that pixels on a screen will fill that empty heart.

_____________________________

[page 23 girl]



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Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Fake Domme & Tactics of a Con: A cautionary - 6/25/2010 6:02:53 PM   
divi


Posts: 11109
Joined: 9/4/2007
Status: offline 		Wow that was deep ..


My mission on this site is no longer to meet anyone but to expose this person for the fraud that they are.

Most normal people would just realize they got screwed and move on. This person (IMO) isnt normal.
And trust me tomorrow 10 more stupid people will replace this one...The saying does say There's a sucker born every minute ..

_____________________________

( imho )

I really could use a wish right now

(in reply to angelikaJ)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Fake Domme & Tactics of a Con: A cautionary - 6/25/2010 6:29:34 PM   
Jeffff


Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
Status: offline 		I absolutley HATE fake dommes!


MistressJeff

_____________________________

"If you don't live it, it won't come out your horn." Charlie Parker

(in reply to divi)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Fake Domme & Tactics of a Con: A cautionary - 6/25/2010 6:37:18 PM   
MisterP61


Posts: 1345
Joined: 10/9/2007
Status: offline 		To the OP

Yes you took responsibility and if what you posted helps even one person then it was a successful post.  However you getting the "I'll show you" attitude with all these peoples opinions seems a bit childish.  There are many on this site you can and will learn from if you stay.... if you leave you will miss out on those opportunities.  I don't have to agree with everyone here, but I still value their words because they are spoken in freedom and I have spent the last 15 years fighting to make sure they can stay that way... free to have their opinions.  That is My worth.  Stick around and see... take what you need    leave the rest


_____________________________

Proudly married to the "Diva of Destruction" LadyPact
Though the truth may vary, this ship will carry our bodies safe to shore - Of Monsters and Men
What is the maximum effective range of an excuse? Zero meters!

(in reply to Jeffff)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Fake Domme & Tactics of a Con: A cautionary - 6/25/2010 6:40:23 PM   
angelikaJ


Posts: 8641
Joined: 6/22/2007
Status: offline 		LH,
First, thank you.

I don't understand throwing money away online either.
I do understand loneliness and desperation both from personal experience and observation.

And the OP admits he knew better and did it anyway because he was lonely.

This may be a derailment(?): I think we do the same thing though when 'sub-frenzied' women make foolish and sometimes dangerous choices sometimes with real people and sometimes online.
At least in the OP's case he didn't end up in a strange city with no money or resources.

We honestly appraise posters faults for pages and then come down on them for getting defensive, all the while, chiding them for not having a backbone.

And for me, for most of them their biggest fault is that they are simply human.

Again, this is not a lecture, this is bafflement... (which I am sure will delight divi in some form or fashion *waves* Hi, divi ).

I believe in accepting personal responsibility. But for many of us, it is a process. As a process I don't get it right all the time.


_____________________________

The original home of the caffeinated psychotic hair pixies.
(as deemed by He who owns me)

http://www.collarchat.com/m_3234821/tm.htm

30 fluffy points!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mQjuCQd01sg

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Fake Domme & Tactics of a Con: A cautionary - 6/25/2010 6:47:39 PM   
laurell3


Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: angelikaJ

LH,
First, thank you.

I don't understand throwing money away online either.
I do understand loneliness and desperation both from personal experience and observation.

And the OP admits he knew better and did it anyway because he was lonely.

This may be a derailment(?): I think we do the same thing though when 'sub-frenzied' women make foolish and sometimes dangerous choices sometimes with real people and sometimes online.
At least in the OP's case he didn't end up in a strange city with no money or resources.

We honestly appraise posters faults for pages and then come down on them for getting defensive, all the while, chiding them for not having a backbone.

And for me, for most of them their biggest fault is that they are simply human.

Again, this is not a lecture, this is bafflement... (which I am sure will delight divi in some form or fashion *waves* Hi, divi ).

I believe in accepting personal responsibility. But for many of us, it is a process. As a process I don't get it right all the time.




I agree. He made a mistake, we all make mistakes, it's not the end of the world, he should stick around and learn and maybe even teach us a thing or two about remembing what it was like to be new. His approach of this site sucks and it's everyone else's fault I made this mistake is really what gets the responses. I really don't believe anyone here thinks they are perfect. I do agree we should cut him some slack.

The reality is these scammers/posers exist because people fall for it, not because there's any real safenet any internet site can put up to stop it totally.

< Message edited by laurell3 -- 6/25/2010 6:49:36 PM >

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to angelikaJ)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Fake Domme & Tactics of a Con: A cautionary - 6/25/2010 6:49:00 PM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: angelikaJ


I believe in accepting personal responsibility. But for many of us, it is a process. As a process I don't get it right all the time.



None of us do, Angelika! And the process leaves scars. I suppose we are more harsh with those that rant about the scammers when the site does so much to warn them, and "common sense" should tell them that LOVE IS FREE.

It's happened to friends of mine, and I ask them WHAT were you thinking, didn't XYZ give you a CLUE??? Nope, guess not!!

_____________________________

[page 23 girl]



(in reply to angelikaJ)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Fake Domme & Tactics of a Con: A cautionary - 6/25/2010 6:49:24 PM   
MisterP61


Posts: 1345
Joined: 10/9/2007
Status: offline 		Mini jack

I Do.... but then again I am a legend in My own mind :P



_____________________________

Proudly married to the "Diva of Destruction" LadyPact
Though the truth may vary, this ship will carry our bodies safe to shore - Of Monsters and Men
What is the maximum effective range of an excuse? Zero meters!

(in reply to laurell3)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Fake Domme & Tactics of a Con: A cautionary - 6/25/2010 6:49:46 PM   
Jeffff


Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MisterP61

To the OP

Yes you took responsibility and if what you posted helps even one person then it was a successful post.  However you getting the "I'll show you" attitude with all these peoples opinions seems a bit childish.  There are many on this site you can and will learn from if you stay.... if you leave you will miss out on those opportunities.  I don't have to agree with everyone here, but I still value their words because they are spoken in freedom and I have spent the last 15 years fighting to make sure they can stay that way... free to have their opinions.  That is My worth.  Stick around and see... take what you need    leave the rest





MrP... when you have some time, I would like to talk to you about....that girl.

There have been........incidences lately..... I think you should know about.





_____________________________

"If you don't live it, it won't come out your horn." Charlie Parker

(in reply to MisterP61)
Profile   Post #: 40
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