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Playing in Public - 6/29/2010 5:39:34 PM   
CompletelyHis


Posts: 5
Joined: 6/29/2010
Status: offline 		How does having your Master play with you in public make you feel?  Would you be upset if He never did?


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RE: Playing in Public - 6/29/2010 5:51:36 PM   
xxblushesxx


Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline 		Explain "play".

He holds onto my wrist when we're shopping...it makes me feel like a little girl and very submissive.

If he tried to do kinky stuff in front of an unsuspecting public, I would know I had chosen someone with values very different from mine.

_____________________________

~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com


(in reply to CompletelyHis)
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RE: Playing in Public - 6/29/2010 5:55:12 PM   
CompletelyHis


Posts: 5
Joined: 6/29/2010
Status: offline 		I mean like at a public party.  We are poly and he plays with others but he has never taken the time to play with me.  I'm a bit upset by this but every time I bring it up I get told I'm being jealous. 

(in reply to xxblushesxx)
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RE: Playing in Public - 6/29/2010 5:58:14 PM   
BreePix


Posts: 208
Joined: 8/12/2007
Status: offline 		my Master and i are poly and use to go to many play partys and at times host our own. i will just say i think it is selfish for your Owner to play with others in that type of setting and just ignore your needs. if my Master ever did that to me i would not know how to feel. i also dont want to insult you or your Master but it somewhat sounds like to me at least your Master is useing the word poly wrong and that he is infact a kinky swinger

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RE: Playing in Public - 6/29/2010 5:59:57 PM   
xxblushesxx


Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline 		Oh. Ok. Hell yeah, I'd be outtta there.

_____________________________

~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com


(in reply to BreePix)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Playing in Public - 6/29/2010 6:08:20 PM   
Andalusite


Posts: 2492
Joined: 1/25/2009
Status: offline 		Hmm, if we had plenty of playtime at home, and he wanted to focus on playing with others in public, I'd probably be ok with that, especially if he was ok with me having a playpartner as well. If he just ignored me, that wouldn't be cool, but I could understand that we have plenty of time to spend with each other the rest of the time. I might ask if we could co-top, or if I could co-bottom with his other partner.

(in reply to xxblushesxx)
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RE: Playing in Public - 6/29/2010 6:10:04 PM   
kyraofMists


Posts: 3292
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline 		Why are you upset by this?
Why do you want him to play with you in public?
How often to you go to play parties?
How often do you play in private?
Do you live together?
How long have you been in a relationship?

We don't often make it out to public parties and when we do he will sometimes play with me and sometimes play with Alandra and sometimes with both. There may be slight disappointment if we do not get played with but we all three go home together at the end of the night. I would much rather have his focus for the hours and hours that I get it than to have it for only a couple hours every week or so. For me, it is a matter of priorities.

Knight's Kyra

_____________________________

"Passion... it lies in all of us. Sleeping, waiting, and though unbidden, it will stir, open its jaws, and howl. It speaks to us, guides us... passion rules us all. And we obey..." ~Angelus

(in reply to CompletelyHis)
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RE: Playing in Public - 6/29/2010 6:59:50 PM   
CompletelyHis


Posts: 5
Joined: 6/29/2010
Status: offline 		We don't play that often at home a problem he has promised to fix.  He has had health issues and with it it's always ' we can play tomorrow'  problem is sometimes its a month or more before it does. We do not live together but I see him at least 4 days a week.  I have been collared to him 18 months.


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RE: Playing in Public - 6/29/2010 7:03:04 PM   
Andalusite


Posts: 2492
Joined: 1/25/2009
Status: offline 		In that case, I can understand you feeling a little un-desired. Definitely discuss it with him respectfully. I'd suggest focusing more on you wanting/needing more play, and less on the other person getting play too. If he and the other person are open to him topping both of you at the same time, that might work, but he may not have the energy for it if he's having health issues.

(in reply to CompletelyHis)
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RE: Playing in Public - 6/29/2010 7:52:05 PM   
CompletelyHis


Posts: 5
Joined: 6/29/2010
Status: offline 		I really truly don't mind him playing with other's.  I enjoy watching the joy on his face as he does.I have helped him several times. He is trying to play more at home with me. But, and this may sound stupid.. just once I would like him to willing and with a good heart play with me in public.  for me it would be like announcing..this is my slave and I cherish her to everyone. somehow the fact that he never has made me feel like he's ashamed of me.  ( ok lots of therapy needed there,lol)
But since I am the only one who wears his collar is it really asking so much?

(in reply to Andalusite)
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RE: Playing in Public - 6/29/2010 8:06:00 PM   
BreePix


Posts: 208
Joined: 8/12/2007
Status: offline 		i dont think its asking much at all. but i also think you need to have a sit down chat with him and just say as nicely as you can that you really want to play with him at a party it would make you feel good and you think it would also bring the two of you closer together

(in reply to CompletelyHis)
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RE: Playing in Public - 6/29/2010 8:19:31 PM   
dreamerdreaming


Posts: 2839
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CompletelyHis

I mean like at a public party.  We are poly and he plays with others but he has never taken the time to play with me.  I'm a bit upset by this but every time I bring it up I get told I'm being jealous. 


So basically he's not validating your feelings, and not addressing your needs and desires properly when it comes to public play. Explain to him exactly what you've said here, about how it makes you feel. If he already knows, then maybe a part of why he does it is that he's getting off on depriving you.

If you're not okay with how things are going during these events, you need to take more of an active role in standing up for yourself and your wants and needs. Everyone deserves the chance to have mutual pleasure and fulfillment, in their relationship.

If he's blowing it for you, and then discounting your feelings when you explain to him, you don't have to put up with it. Just because you're submissive, that doesn't mean your brain fell out your ear. Use it.

Insist that your feelings, desires and needs be properly addressed.

_____________________________

Download SLAVE LOVER. Explicit BDSM porn, with a plot! A love story, on a FemDom planet! http://www.amazon.com/Slave-Lover-Chronicles-Book-ebook/dp/B0031ERBLI/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1261973416&sr=1

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RE: Playing in Public - 6/29/2010 8:48:56 PM   
playfulotter


Posts: 2195
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline 		We don't play in public except for imperceptible things like what xxblushesxx related...He likes me to walk a bit behind him but sometimes I grab onto his back belt loop..ha ha..He likes us to both eat off of the same plate in a restaurant too (most of the time)..those are the only things I can think of right now.

(in reply to CompletelyHis)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Playing in Public - 6/29/2010 8:58:03 PM   
LPslittleclip


Posts: 1163
Joined: 9/29/2007
Status: offline 		my Mistress plays with me whenever She can but when She plays with otheres i dont get upset by it as it brings Her enjoyment and i will be able to hold Her later. but as far as your want to play in public it should be something that you discuss with your Dominant/Master. open communication is the only way to have a relationship. respectfully of course.

_____________________________

proud to serve the awsome
LadyPact

(in reply to playfulotter)
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RE: Playing in Public - 6/29/2010 9:44:16 PM   
ForgetMeKnots


Posts: 95
Joined: 6/14/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: dreamerdreaming

Just because you're submissive, that doesn't mean your brain fell out your ear. Use it.



I love this.  May I steal it? 

LOL

_____________________________

~Formerly KneelforAnne~

BDSM is what two people at the moment decide it should be...
--CatdeMedici

Member of the Subbie Mafia
Pimpette
Member of MoGa's IN crowd

(in reply to dreamerdreaming)
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RE: Playing in Public - 6/29/2010 9:52:08 PM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CompletelyHis

How does having your Master play with you in public make you feel?  Would you be upset if He never did?





Uh, he is using you. With you in tow he can play "serious dom" and play with hotter women but who wouldn't fuck him and so he can take his moped home and fuck you in more ways than one.

Harsh, ugly but true.

Not because of WHAT he does but HOW he has let you feel about it.

(in reply to CompletelyHis)
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RE: Playing in Public - 6/29/2010 11:13:31 PM   
BreePix


Posts: 208
Joined: 8/12/2007
Status: offline 		wow michael that was really harsh, i know its how you feel and all but could of said it maybe a little better

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RE: Playing in Public - 6/29/2010 11:50:08 PM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BreePix

wow michael that was really harsh, i know its how you feel and all but could of said it maybe a little better


I could say it so sweetly that she would stay...I could say it in a way she could ignore, but I didn't and I hope that I am an unmitigated ass and that he loves her with all his heart and this is all a giant misunderstanding and he takes better care of her than any woman I have ever been with. Sadly, I just don't think that is the case and perhaps by leaving him now she will find someone who does value her, who wants to be proud of being with her, who when he is with her other women look on with envy.

(in reply to BreePix)
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RE: Playing in Public - 6/30/2010 12:43:59 AM   
sunshinemiss


Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ForgetMeKnots

quote:

ORIGINAL: dreamerdreaming

Just because you're submissive, that doesn't mean your brain fell out your ear. Use it.



I love this.  May I steal it? 

LOL



I was just about to say the same thing.

And you know.... Michael knows a lot about men. While I may not always agree with him, I always consider what he says. He is a wise man.

Sugar sometimes ruins reality.

Best,
sunshine

_____________________________

Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

(in reply to ForgetMeKnots)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Playing in Public - 6/30/2010 4:13:04 AM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CompletelyHis

How does having your Master play with you in public make you feel? 


It depends on *how* he is playing with me. Might make me feel slutty, high, silly, afraid.. pretty much the same things I feel in private although there are things that we will only do in private and would never do in public.

quote:

Would you be upset if He never did?


It's hard for me to imagine going to a public space and him not playing with me as he's sort of a slut that way and I'm his favorite target but I guess it would depend on whether or not he thought the energy was right, how I was feeling etc. If he chose not to play with me *ever* but was playing with other people all the time, I would probably ask him "what's up?" Am I being punished for something, is he bored with playing me, does he just want some fresh meat, am I too much of a wimp for his sadistic nature (laughs). I mean, given our history, there would be *something* up and as one half of the relationship dynamic, I'd like to know exactly what it is because maybe I need to do something, change something or ponder something and it sure as hell is hard to do that if he's not going to open up and tell me what I need to know to serve him in the best possible way. I am just as responsible for ensuring that our relationship thrives as he is and I know that's not how everyone rolls, but that is how we roll and it has been working for a good long while that way.

edited to fix quote box

< Message edited by BitaTruble -- 6/30/2010 4:15:35 AM >

_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."


(in reply to CompletelyHis)
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