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Murin -> RE: Online collars (7/5/2010 1:02:24 PM)
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Mayhaps I was a bit harsh in throwing out that online collars are joke, but allow Me to redefine that. I was fairly tired when I wrote that OP and may have not been thinking as clearly as I should have been.
Alot of the times I have seen (mainly on AirG) online collars and the concept of them made into a joke. I lost track of the number of times that I saw a girl be collared to a Master only to find out she was "collar-stacking" by this I mean it came to light that in additiion to the screen name she was collared to the first Master under she had other screen names where she was collared to other Masters. Now truly I don't get all neo-nazi about it when I see that people are engaged in the practice of online collaring. I should note that it is a matter of presonal preference I believe. Let Me say this that the word "stance" was probably too strong a word to use. Its just something that was eating away at Me for some number of months.
Now I have seen instances where online collars have worked, as shown by the people who have replied to this thread who it worked or works for them. Bravo to you all for being able to do it, I fear I wouldn't be able to find the same peace of mind in it however. Maybe its just from the harshness of My own personal experiences as well which leads Me back to the saying that what doesn't kill Me only makes Me stronger. I know that I could never engage in the practice again but that is a matter of personal choice.
don't get Me wrong I am not criticizing those who engage in it (if it works for them so much the better). I've seen alot of things happen besides My own experiences which gives Me pause when I witness an online collaring. I point back to what I said originally about the themes applied of Love and Trust, body, soul and mind. I just fail to see how anyone can tell someone that they love them if they have never met them. I've been on the other side of the screen as it were. While it felt good that someone claimed they loved Me even though they didn't really know Me, I did find Myself wanting much more. In many cases in My experiences, I put Myself out there only to get hurt. I realize that the chances we all take involving any sort of relationship could always backfire, but I'm prone to believe that basic human nature is a better thing than that. Maybe I am just a fool in believing that but I would hope that My faith in Mankind wouldn't be tarnished by the callous actions of others. Or maybe its just My tough luck. *shrugs*
I do note however that no one made a comment on the gorean bit about the sins of the past being washed away by the collar (or maybe I just missed it?) I've heard that expression used in BDSM as well as Gor. I still think that there is a double standard when it comes to that. For example, Raigar was a good guy all the way around just wanted to expand his horizons so to speak. I knew him quite well in fact before he got into Gor. When the shit hit the fan with him in Tabor he pointed out the double standard and he was told that it didn't matter. Now here's My thought. How can those that attacked Him honestly sit there and tell him that any sort of double standard is okay?
Are Dominants expected to be perfect? Of course not, no one is and I indeed will be the first to tell anyone I am flawed. I would expect that transgressions could be forgiven. Again maybe it was just because they didn't like Raigar in the first place, but I should note that He became an outcast from the gorean community on AirG shortly thereafter even though He did not push the matter any further. He realized that no matter what he did, people would believe the worst about Him. He ended up changing His screen name and returning back to His original methods. A loss of the gorean community on AirG because He was very knowledgeable, but yet a gain for others because he brought that knowledge and wisdom to others.
thanks for the great replies folks.
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