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CynthiaWVirginia -> RE: You're looking a boyfriend, not a Dom. (7/11/2010 3:25:56 AM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Gromgor
An annoying trend I've come to notice among the general population using the site (Maybe not the Forums but the site in general), and perhaps it's a regional occurrence, is the plainly obvious profiles of subs/slaves/switches/whatever be they male, female or something in-between saying they're looking for that one person who only wants them and blah blah blah. You're looking a boyfriend, not BDSM. You might like BDSM. You might like getting your hair pulled during sex. But you're not here to meet people to chat with and learn about the lifestyle. You're looking for a boyfriend. Stop putting in your profile that you're open to this or that when later on in your post you state that you only want this one specific kind of relationship.
Fine. You want a boyfriend/girlfriend/whatever, that's perfectly fine. But stop insulting my intelligence. You're desperation for a committed relationship is just bursting out of your profiles and it's rude to believe that we're too dumb to realize it.
Your kink is not my kink, and I will do whatever I wish without having to apologise or consult you about it. Are we clear on this?
I don't feel any need to answer to you, I'm only saying this to educate you some that your way isn't the only way. Years ago, when I came here, I was looking for my One. I wanted everything, including love.
Now, I returned just for friends and for brushing up on things I might have forgotten about and to maybe learn some new things as well and...surprise surprise, I may have found a boyfriend/sub.
(On the other hand, if it weren't for people *desperate* for relationships...there would be a lot less people at this site.)
If you are offering only BDSM and nothing emotional, then I wish you good luck in your search. You'll probably need it. If this is not for you, don't write to subs/slaves who "are desperate for a committed relationship" but seek out others whose needs match your own.
Someone clearly stating their own needs has...nothing...to do with insulting your intelligence. I've been here a good 5 years and I never even heard your username until today...no decision I ever made had anything to do with you.
I fail to see how it's rude to state what one is looking for. If you avoid being someone's boyfriend because it's impossible for you to stay Dom with her, then that's your own issue to deal with and you must realize that not everybody has that probem.
I worried for a while that my Domme feelings would go POOF if I got too sappy over someone...until I realized when he said something that made me go all warm and fuzzy that I also suddenly wanted to hurt him. [:D] The more I hurt him, the closer I feel and the more I want to boss him around.
See? Not everyone is like you.
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