RE: On-line relationships. What is the deal?

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RE: On-line relationships. What is the deal? - 7/17/2010 12:18:22 AM

Zevar

Posts: 801
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SaintAllie

also to Zevar..

If you could reduce the length of your replies a bit more?.. sometimes I bypass your replies due to their lengthiness..

this is in no means any comment as to the content of your responses..I find your general responses to be both relevant and thought provoking.

regards

Allie

Greetings Allie:

At times brevity is a human weakness. I agree. While at other times it is not. Therefore while your comment is acknowledged you might want to consider clicking the Hide Button thus avoiding my entries altogether.

Keep in mind that I usually write not even considering that anyone might seriously read my entries. If so then it is to my sincere surprise. Do know that there was no intent to do harm in my actions with the particular entry that you mentioned.

However, thank you kindly for your thoughts!

Take care...

(in reply to SaintAllie)

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RE: On-line relationships. What is the deal? - 7/17/2010 12:37:51 AM

SaintAllie

Posts: 158
Joined: 3/23/2006
Status: offline

greetings Zevar,

asking me to hide your comments is like .. turning out the lights when people haven;t left yet.

I enjoy your contributions.. and I'm quite sure I am not alone...

Are you making an effort to hide? If you don't want readers here to take your postings seriously.. then don't post..

I feel the boards would be less rich in response, should you choose to withhold your opinion.

kind regards

Allie

_____________________________

........"I am determined to press onward through my fears. When I dare to be powerful, to use my strength in the service of my vision, then it becomes less and less important whether I am afraid." ---Audre Lorde

Keep NZ nuclear free..

(in reply to Zevar)

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Post #: 42

RE: On-line relationships. What is the deal? - 7/17/2010 12:47:47 AM

porcelaine

Posts: 5020
Joined: 7/24/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Zevar

The human element of the ego perhaps played out in an unconscious manner might full well be a contributing factor for some when it is discovered that they lack integrity in their online relating. In person or not some people refuse to acknowledge human errors even when confronted. Thus many choose to avoid being accountable. This perhaps might be why some people prefer to seek out people online so that they can act out their inappropriate behaviors and avoid personal responsibility. For some it is perhaps more likely to be simply related to an online addiction thus they develop the calloused attitude of “ You’re not for me so I am on to the next person, click.” Carelessly discarding the humanness in all living breathing human beings, when repeatedly expressed, indeed does reflect indictors of character issues which surely would be best suited for an honest deed of self examination, IMO.

My comment is in reference to the portion in bold and I happen to disagree. The same thing takes place in person and I can't recollect any man off the top of my head that remained in a situation when he had no desire to be there with the other party. He may elect to cultivate a friendship, but I believe there must be mutual interest on both ends for that to take place. I think the same idea holds true for women as well.

I don't view the individual described as addicted, but merely someone that is in touch with what they're seeking partner wise. I think it's unrealistic to expect hand holding if the individual doesn't meet their requirements. And politeness aside, expectation and inappropriate emotional investment can render behavior more inflammatory than intended or intentionally delivered. I see callousness in very distinct ways and expressing disinterest isn't something I'd equate with such unless it was done so in a brutal manner. And even still my choice to take offense or allow piercing is personally derived. Other options exist in my opinion.

~porcelaine

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Post #: 43

RE: On-line relationships. What is the deal? - 7/17/2010 1:16:26 AM

Zevar

Posts: 801
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SaintAllie

greetings Zevar,

asking me to hide your comments is like .. turning out the lights when people haven;t left yet.

I enjoy your contributions.. and I'm quite sure I am not alone...

Are you making an effort to hide? If you don't want readers here to take your postings seriously.. then don't post..

I feel the boards would be less rich in response, should you choose to withhold your opinion.

kind regards

Allie

Greetings Allie:

Thank you for taking your time to reply to my latest entry. I fully understand your words. Point well taken.

I do want to clarify that I am not by any means hiding. I simply meant that I am not of the belief that my entries were seriously read by many.

In reading your reply apparently I am mistaken. Thank you, kindly.

Take care & G’night for me….

(in reply to SaintAllie)

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Post #: 44

RE: On-line relationships. What is the deal? - 7/17/2010 1:21:47 AM

SaintAllie

Posts: 158
Joined: 3/23/2006
Status: offline

Greetings again Zevar,

Be very much assured that your comments are read and also appreciated.. Both Lady Pact and myself responded to your last offering.

We both offered comments in a constructive manner.. I hope you took our comments as such..

kind regards

Allie

_____________________________

........"I am determined to press onward through my fears. When I dare to be powerful, to use my strength in the service of my vision, then it becomes less and less important whether I am afraid." ---Audre Lorde

Keep NZ nuclear free..

(in reply to Zevar)

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Post #: 45

RE: On-line relationships. What is the deal? - 7/17/2010 7:41:56 AM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Syrox

I suppose where i am struggling to "Get" this is how the BDSM aspects could work in something like that.

Well, back when we were ldr and met every six weeks at best, he would email me instructions. What to wear being a top one. But also how many emails he wanted from me that day. He could order me when to be in bed in order to make sure I got enough sleep. He could order me to eat decent meals and tell him since I have a habit on my own of not eating properly.

A couple of times we were chatting late at night and I said I had to sign off and take the garbage down to the road. Which I had a habit of doing in nightgown and slippers. Instead I would be told to sign back on after to assure him I made it there safely.

Anything he can control in real life he could control online.

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Post #: 46