RE: Power and Stupidity

RE: Power and Stupidity (Full Version)

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LaTigresse -> RE: Power and Stupidity (7/19/2010 1:57:47 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: domiguy What you are saying is that you would not offer her a back rub? The place smells like a fish farm. If I found her bangable I would likely offer her considerably more than a backrub.

NuevaVida -> RE: Power and Stupidity (7/19/2010 1:57:51 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: jujubeeMB Though I probably should feel like an idiot long enough to do something about it. Don't feel like an idiot. There's no need. Just love yourself. That's where taking care of yourself stems from.

porcelaine -> RE: Power and Stupidity (7/19/2010 2:01:26 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LaTigresse Yes. Which was kinda the point of my original post " To the farm". And why I suggested a friend rather than otherwise. Perhaps another hetro, submissive woman that has already lived some of this stuff and come out the other side, much stronger and wiser. LaT, You're correct. When I found myself in a similar situation years ago I turned to a female dominant that I trusted a great deal. I don't believe men can't offer the same, but I can recount many instances when their assistance was very shady and that's putting it mildly. quote: ORIGINAL: domiguy What you are saying is that you would not offer her a back rub? The place smells like a fish farm. Stop hating and drop in. [:D] ~porcelaine

porcelaine -> RE: Power and Stupidity (7/19/2010 2:03:13 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LaTigresse quote: ORIGINAL: domiguy What you are saying is that you would not offer her a back rub? The place smells like a fish farm. If I found her bangable I would likely offer her considerably more than a backrub. lmao And unlike Domiguy you cut to the chase. [;)] ~porcelaine

JstAnotherSub -> RE: Power and Stupidity (7/19/2010 2:11:21 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DarkSteven I hate to say this, bu he has a direct line to your pussy that is very dangerous to you. Tell him that it's over and you never want anything to do with him again. Get a restraining order if you need to. And smack that pussy for getting you into this. All great advice cept that last line. Smacking your pussy at a time like this makes you (or made me-lol) want to go back and give in to him. You gotta ignore that ignorant thing and let it dry up for a spell! ;o)

tazzygirl -> RE: Power and Stupidity (7/19/2010 2:15:17 PM)
juju, there is much i want to tell you, but i wont do it on these boards. you have mail.

domiguy -> RE: Power and Stupidity (7/19/2010 10:38:44 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: tazzygirl juju, there is much i want to tell you, but i wont do it on these boards. you have mail. Of course not...That is not what they are for.

Chrisincuffs -> RE: Power and Stupidity (7/19/2010 11:10:19 PM)
My Master knows how to get to the recesses of my mind, he knows how I think. We've always been on that level you know? He has the power to do everything your Dom has done to you. I have given that power to Him as you have given to your ex-Dom. However I gave my Master that power because I trust him and above all of this He's my best friend and would NEVER use that power to emotionally hurt me, or fuck with my mind in any way. I gave him that power because of that level of trust. If he ever EVER threw that back in my face or took lightly the power I have given him, that man would no longer exist to me.

domiguy -> RE: Power and Stupidity (7/20/2010 7:01:07 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Chrisincuffs My Master knows how to get to the recesses of my mind, he knows how I think. We've always been on that level you know? He has the power to do everything your Dom has done to you. I have given that power to Him as you have given to your ex-Dom. However I gave my Master that power because I trust him and above all of this He's my best friend and would NEVER use that power to emotionally hurt me, or fuck with my mind in any way. I gave him that power because of that level of trust. If he ever EVER threw that back in my face or took lightly the power I have given him, that man would no longer exist to me. I like that your master has requested that you find a slave to dominate.....Gotta love those LDR's!!!

DesFIP -> RE: Power and Stupidity (7/20/2010 8:00:03 AM)
Have read the op only, not the follow ups. What I would do is send a letter, certified and registered, with me keeping the original. Stating that I had enjoyed the conversation very much and it was an enjoyable fantasy but that's all it was. And that I would prosecute to the extent of the law if he as much as touches me. I would also say that I'm moving on and not answering his calls or IMs or reading his emails in future because you know he can be trusted about as far as you can trust a grand piano. That although he claimed he would change in order to fix the relationship, within two weeks he was again being the ass that caused you to end it. And that until he has had six months minimum of therapy on his issues about his fear of emotional vulnerability you don't want to know from him. Because he sounds like the sort of idiot who would violate all your hard limits because you said this sounded hot in theory.

dreamerdreaming -> RE: Power and Stupidity (7/20/2010 8:10:41 AM)
JUJUBEE! WAKE UP! You've been dreaming. Wake up and dream a new, better dream, of a partner whose needs and desires mesh well with yours. And of you being TRULY, SWEETLY, BEAUTIFULLY HAPPY SINGLE until that guy comes along to mess up your sweet time. [:)] Dream a dream of a guy who doesn't take advantage of your vulnerability in a bad way. Dream a sweet dream of a guy who won't place his selfish needs over yours, to your detriment. Imagine a guy who won't waste your time. It is past time to lay aside your clingy, desperate dreams of fitting nicely together with this guy who doesn't fit nicely together with you. Replace thoughts of him with forward thinking, productive thoughts. When your clit and pussy throb, train yourself out of thinking of him. Stop letting your hormones and maybe a lapse in self-esteem, point you in a direction that you know is a dead end for you. Control your thoughts. They're yours. YOU are yours alone. BE the kind of owner for yourself, that you deserve, desire and need. You know you can do this, and you know you want to, really. You want a long-term relationship that is deeply satisfying and fulfilling for you and your partner- that feeds the needs and desires that you SHARE. You know you can't have it with this guy. So stop shamelessly throwing yourself at him. That sort of behavior looks like low self-esteem. Address that issue properly. Get self-esteem the old fashioned way. Earn it. Cut off all contact with this selfish, manipulative guy who blew it with you. Don't give him any more chances. Give all the rest of the chances to make things right to YOURSELF. He is not good enough for you because he's not a good match for you. You don't have time to waste. Block and delete him, stop letting yourself think about him, feel good and happy about yourself in whatever way you need to- you don't need his help to feel worthy, valuable, precious, good.... Grow a spine and LEAVE IT. Don't wait. Do it NOW. YOU GO, GIRL!

crazyml -> RE: Power and Stupidity (7/20/2010 8:33:49 AM)
I loved this... quote: ORIGINAL: laurell3 You are much more intelligent and much stronger than you are acting right now, You so know what you need to do. It doesn't need you to get an injunction, send a letter (registered or otherwise). You just need to make the decision you know is right for you. And then keep to it. It's easy to slip - once someone knows how to "play" and "play with.." you it's tempting to let them have another pop... but... you really do know what the right thing to do is... Hugs!

jujubeeMB -> RE: Power and Stupidity (7/20/2010 8:34:11 AM)
Well, I took everyone's advice, because you were all right. The problem now, of course, is that I feel like throwing up and want to call him every .2 seconds. However, in spite of my actions, I really do have strong self-esteem and a backbone and I'm going to not do it. Again, thanks for all the amazing support, both in posts and CMail. You guys are pretty incredible.

heartcream -> RE: Power and Stupidity (7/20/2010 8:44:45 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LaTigresse Do you have a best friend that you trust 100%, that understands the type of relationship we are talking about? If so, can you transfer that power to them? Then, trust them to give you that back, for yourself? I know that sounds cheesy but it might work. Now is this an example of a grumpy bitch orrrrrrrrrrr the cutest Lady Tiger everrrrr?

heartcream -> RE: Power and Stupidity (7/20/2010 8:51:03 AM)
It smells like wild fish, not farmed fish, there is a distinct difference.

WestBaySlave -> RE: Power and Stupidity (7/20/2010 1:11:46 PM)
I am sorry you're going through this, but damn, if I can't relate. I've had more than one toxic person in my life who knows how to push every button and manipulate me into submission. And the worst part is the internal knowledge that it's you doing it to yourself as much as its them doing it to you! On some level you want what he offers. And that's okay - allow yourself that feeling; no need to feel bad about it. Something obviously brought you two together to begin with, and chances are that something is still there between you. The important part to remember is that the things you left him for are still there, too, and once the intoxication wears off... the hurt remains. If I were you, I'd cut things off with him. He knows what makes you tick, he knows what pushes your buttons, and he clearly wants you back. You already have one experience that shows you how vulnerable to him and how close you came to returning to him. If you don't want to return to what you had before, if you don't want that life, then get away, or at the least, put some space between you two until you've reached such a point that you're thoroughly, thoroughly over him and have established a life complete without his presence.

jujubeeMB -> RE: Power and Stupidity (7/20/2010 1:37:15 PM)
I do feel the need to add that I think this was as much my fault as it was his. I definitely wanted it, and it was really, really hard for me to want to listen to the part that was hurting and completely in need of ending the relationship. I just wanted to listen to the stuff that always made what we had great, and that part was the dark depths he could take me to. I just couldn't get him to be present with me out of those dark depths. It's so frustrating and so sad. But I didn't want to completely shift the blame off myself - I couldn't resist submitting, and I should have.

LadyPact -> RE: Power and Stupidity (7/20/2010 1:47:13 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: jujubeeMB I do feel the need to add that...... Would you consider a friendly suggestion? People gave you a lot of good advice on this thread about recanting what you told him. It might be to your benefit to ask a Mod if you could have the ability to edit the post here basically where you said you would give him consent to do those things. Just a note at the bottom of the original comment where you can say that you do not give him that consent. If it can't be worked out to make that addition, it might be in your best interest to CYA (cover your ass) here by stating it publicly. I wouldn't want anything written on this thread to be used against you in any way.

sunshinemiss -> RE: Power and Stupidity (7/20/2010 2:41:11 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ourmsbetty Yeah, definitely revoke the consent... in writing. And then stop talking to him. It's all manipulation. You'll feel better, believe me. THIS... Seriously... IN WRITING. Geesh, you gave him carte blanche. What if he actually does kidnap you? That could be very bad. And you would have no recourse. He may have taped it. "But Your Honor, she said he could. We even have the proof." (I see LadyPact is thinking the same way... I feel smart!) good luck, sunshine

BigDaddy723 -> RE: Power and Stupidity (7/20/2010 2:57:19 PM)
LadyPact has a very good point too. In the unlikely event he does read the post it is still there.

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