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lostsub26 -> RE: Power and Stupidity (7/20/2010 7:21:23 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: laurell3
quote:
ORIGINAL: lostsub26
You topped him...
He started acting like a bit of a jerk, because he realized that he lost his Dominant position as Master of the house and the relationship. By him catering to YOUR needs just shows that he was malleable and he became the sub in the relationship, which is not what you're looking for i bet. You are a submissive and you want to cater to your Master's needs. Not the other way around. So when he was trying to win you back, is it not true that you remained firm in your conviction not to get back together? Of course it is. You don't want some guy trailing after you like a lost puppy. How repulsive and submissive of him! :)
And when the tables turned and suddenly he regained his dominance over you, isn't that what you secretly craved with your entire being?
My advice is that the both of you need to figure out your role in the relationship. A strong leadership needs to be established and can't keep wavering back and forth. Otherwise, you two ought to just be vanilla or a switch couple.
On the other hand, i think you desire to be a slave more than you know, but you're still not ready to totally let go of control to someone who isn't fully in control and is even a little confused.
You'd have to read all of her posts on this relationship and the problems in it to really understand that yes, in fact, what you are saying is absolute garbage. Not everything is about role. All humans have the right to have their needs met. He didn't meet them and made no attempt to listen when she brought it up. She also expresses true fear of him. That's not bottoming, that's an asshole, apparently your opinions mirror his in that regard.
juju, I know this is a rough time for you, I wish there were magic words to make it all better. There aren't. However, I am confident that out of this experience you will learn more about yourself and what you really need to be healthy and happy.
So does every person you experience true fear with, also get you all wet and horny? don't give me that crap that she fears him. What she fears is losing control, because she's kind of a control freak i bet. And the fact that not having control of him, is what gets her off, thus her fantasies about being "kidnapped" and "raped".
She's no victim. She LOVES being "scared" and "helpless", because she's a kinky bitch. OK, maybe he's not the right guy for her, emotionally and what not. I can;t judge, but sexually, he rocks her boat...provided that he takes ALL control. Read the thread again and pay closer attention.
You can choose to look at only the negative and build your opinion based on that. You could point your finger and say, "poor little victim" and "what a tyrant". Then tell her break up, run away bs.
Or you can see what IS working in their relationship and encourage her to build that part up. It's a matter of choice and perspective.
And if that qualifies what I wrote as garbage, maybe it's because you weren't looking at it from my angle. But there's no need to condemn new ideas and different ways of looking at things, just cause you don't understand them. That's called ignorance and intolerance.
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