BeachMystress
Posts: 2156
Joined: 4/3/2004
From: Naples Island- Long Beach CA - Southern California
Status: offline
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AQSM, I'd be surprised if you went to Passive Arts. M&b gave up on the venue quite some time ago.
Other websites, where the So Cal community gathers to share, have commented up a storm and our local dungeons are doing remembrances for both John and others we have tragically lost recently.
It is a very odd feeling to know someone who has been brutally murdered. The last time I saw John, I expressed my displeasure over his at-then-new policy of no full nudity (nipples and all lower holes covered) so he could sell alcohol. Not only is CBT harder to do through underwear, the drunken vanilla spectators stumbled into the middle of scenes, were disrespectful and rude. They touched people and toys without asking, playing with and even going so far as pocketing them! A woman I caught trying to steal one of my zippers said she just wanted a souvenir; something to show her friends. She was miffed when I didn't understand and insisted upon the return.
One of our last evenings there a group of 12 intoxicated semi-nilla settled directly beside our station and proceeded to shriek, laugh the loud braying laughter of the drunk and talk in loud voices. The first time I politely explained the problem to them, asked them to respect the customs of most dungeons and answered their questions on several of the things I was doing to my husband. The second time I had to speak to them (less than ten mins later) it was more of a "come on folks, there is a socializing space down the hall. If you have to be loud, please go there." The third time, which occurred immediately before a harsh strike of my four foot metal core bamboo cane, jerked my husband out of his subspace and he took the full pain of the blow without the headspace-cushion. I could tell from the way he stiffened and started shuddering that it had been very bad for him. That did it. I blew up at them and chased them out physically. We then packed up and left, my subhubby traumatized and in shock and me so angry it was hard to keep my hands from shaking. (We were 15 mins from home and I felt aftercare would be more nurturing in our own bed.) We told John about the situation early on as it was developing and asked for help. I asked that he have someone official tell them to be quiet or go to the social area/dance floor. He said no. John wasn't interested in making any of the semi-nilla's or lookie loos unhappy since they, not the people actually playing, were the ones buying the drinks. And the alcohol consumption was the main source of weekend income.
We went to Passive Arts once after that. It was also an unpleasant experience and before leaving I expressed my displeasure to John, letting him know we'd no longer be patronizing his establishment. That while I understood he needed to make money I felt the practice of mixing inexperienced people, BDSM and alcohol was a creating an environment non-conducive to play.
Please keep in mind that Passive Arts is.. or was :-( .. a Pro Dungeon which hosted open-to-all parties with a full bar on weekend nights. John was not doing them as a community service, but for the profit. And unlike the other local dungeon owners he was not an overly active part of the community. The other Dungeons host fund raisers, charity events, munches and educational classes. They promote community unity and safety. When one local munch group approached John about having an hour long rope munch once a month at Passive Arts, he told them they could rent the space at full dungeon price. I -and many others- felt BDSM was just about money to John.
He was a businessman. Yes his death is awful. It makes me sick to my stomach that someone I know.. knew.. was murdered. I've never heard anything about John that would make him deserve such a brutal and evil end. I am saddened and sickened. But it does not strike me to the core BDSM-wise as it would if something happened to Kane at the Lair, Lady Badger, Caryl, Cyan or other of our social activists.
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Beach Mystress
*Do not threaten the weak. Intimidate the strong. ~ Stevenson*
http://beachmystress.jigsy.com
http://www.flickr.com/photos/beachmystress/
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Passive Arts Fire.... Owner Killed. - 
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