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RE: How do YOU find out your online aquaintance is not ... - 8/1/2010 7:51:57 PM   
DragonNphoenix


Posts: 617
Joined: 8/2/2005
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[/quote]
Heh, that did make me laugh.  I don't see a lot of studmuffins on the guys' side!

BTW Dragon, Ron's the last guy you'd need to tell to get out from under the mattress.

[/quote]<---^ ???


Just making sure! Good to know!!

Dragon

"I write of the great, eternal truths that bind together all mankind. The whole world over, we eat, we shit, we fuck, we kill and we die."

< Message edited by DragonNphoenix -- 8/1/2010 7:53:17 PM >


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Profile   Post #: 141
RE: How do YOU find out your online aquaintance is not ... - 8/1/2010 8:04:23 PM   
DragonNphoenix


Posts: 617
Joined: 8/2/2005
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I digress..

Have enjoyed this fun spark ignited here but the forums are Phoenix' thing not really mine. Forums never really have been. Enjoy and dont take your selves too seriously. Seriously in the end the person with the most/best toys takes a dirt nap like the rest.
I bid all Adue!

Dragon

"Farewell! Thou art too dear for my possessing, And like enough thou know'st thy estimate, The charter of thy worth gives thee releasing;
My bonds in thee are all determinate. For how do I hold thee but by thy granting, And for that riches where is my deserving?
The cause of this fair gift in me is wanting, And so my patent back again is swerving. Thyself thou gav'st, thy own worth then not knowing,
Or me, to whom thou gav'st it, else mistaking;
So thy great gift upon misprision growing, Comes home again, on better judgement making. Thus have I had thee as a dream doth flatter,
In sleep a king, but waking no such matter."
William Shakespear

For with out a farwell how then are we to again meet?!

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Profile   Post #: 142
RE: How do YOU find out your online aquaintance is not ... - 8/1/2010 8:56:50 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
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quote:

ORIGINAL: thornhappy

quote:

ORIGINAL: DragonNphoenix

Tis Dragon again.

Let’s see...... Where to begin? Hmm...

I have suggested to collarme to make it a pay site FREQUENTLY just for that reason and YES I would PONY up for it unlike you obviously!

Go try Alt.com, and see how many fakes are there.  There be plenty!



How much does that site charge?

_____________________________

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Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

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Profile   Post #: 143
RE: How do YOU find out your online aquaintance is not ... - 8/1/2010 9:21:22 PM   
Toppingfrmbottom


Posts: 6528
Joined: 6/7/2009
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good.

quote:

ORIGINAL: CynthiaWVirginia





No, I'm not that big of an ass.   I call on one day in what happens to be "their" morning, on another within their afternoon, at their night, and at sometime during the weekend.  As I would expect to be able to do with any single person.  I do not interrupt someone's sleep cycle...


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Profile   Post #: 144
RE: How do YOU find out your online aquaintance is not ... - 8/3/2010 12:07:10 AM   
JoJohannsson


Posts: 30
Joined: 12/27/2008
Status: offline
Hi.

I am aware that there is no shortcut with sincere people.
I am just looking to find out fakes as early as possible.
Easy with those with crappy, tell-tale profiles. Not so always with those whose profiles look genuine.

Sure I am willing to take all the time it takes to get to know someone.
Just currently I am in communication with a lady(?) who seems pretty genuine in her messages, but I am currently following a, well, hint that she might not be who she says she is.

Cheers, Jo

(in reply to marie2)
Profile   Post #: 145
RE: How do YOU find out your online aquaintance is not ... - 8/3/2010 12:10:24 AM   
JoJohannsson


Posts: 30
Joined: 12/27/2008
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Who says I am gullible ;-)

I am extremely wary. So far I believe I have found out most fakes without too many false positives.
But it costs time. Time I would like to minimize, so I can rather "invest" it to get to know genuine people.
I do prefer real life. But since no subs seem to be running around in T-shirts saying "I am a free sub, take me!" ... ;-)

Cheers, Jo

(in reply to Level)
Profile   Post #: 146
RE: How do YOU find out your online aquaintance is not ... - 8/3/2010 12:22:11 AM   
JoJohannsson


Posts: 30
Joined: 12/27/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: porcelaine
This is ONLY helpful if the sender is using an email client that displays the originating IP.


This is of course true.

quote:

ORIGINAL: porcelaine
This is ONLY helpful if the sender is using an email client that displays the originating IP.


I can assure you that I have found originating IPs in emails sent through the webmail interfaces of Yahoo Mail and Hotmail. I do not (yet) know about Gmail. Of course, services that provide SMTP it's a different pair of shoes, especially if the sender uses means to ensure anonymity.

quote:

ORIGINAL: porcelaine
And don't forget the programs that maintain anonymity The details are intentionally falsified and you'd need access to some good 'stuff' to untangle it.

~porcelaine


Sure, if a faker/scammer takes such elaborate measures it will be hard to find him out. Especially if his/her communication seems genuine, too. Then, phone verification (i.e. talking to the person on the phone) should do the trick. Hopefully.

Also, personally, I believe the fat red line on top of the CM message pages is important:

DO NOT SEND MONEY TO OTHER USERS FOR ANY REASON!

But who of you reasonable people would do that anyway? ;-)

Cheers, Jo

(in reply to porcelaine)
Profile   Post #: 147
RE: How do YOU find out your online aquaintance is not ... - 8/3/2010 12:26:20 AM   
sunshinemiss


Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DragonNphoenix

The coffee thing works great if you are in the same area. But if your talking to other accross the country.. gotta go a different route.


I heard a rumor that sometimes people go on vacations or business trips.  I could swear I read that.  Maybe it was on the wall in Jeffff's bathroom.  I dunno.

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Profile   Post #: 148
RE: How do YOU find out your online aquaintance is not ... - 8/3/2010 12:34:53 AM   
JoJohannsson


Posts: 30
Joined: 12/27/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: wittynamehere

The first one (getting them to write their name) would be near impossible to fake, if their name is written on something textured or contoured. I don't know anyone who can fake that, and I know some good image editors. Name across tits, for example. If it's anything but very low res, it should be proof indeed.


Impossible to fake if they send you the original pic (size). If it has been reduced in size any number of edits may have happened before that. How well done, that is of course another question. (And I think one can assume that not all fakers are THAT savvy and will make such an effort). Name accross tits requires that they bare them, will they do this early on in the conversation? Is that a reasonable demand before having met a sub?

Side question to you subs on here: would you comply with such a request, say, after a couple of weeks of email communications, may be a phone call?

quote:

ORIGINAL: wittynamehere
You'd give your phone number before a photo? Hmmm. A phone number can be abused. Prank calls, abusive texts, reverse lookups, etc.


Not my regular number of course. In Germany it is pretty easy to acquire a mobile phone with a prepaid card. I have had one given to me free by a newly opened mobile phone shop as a free giveaway - including a first credit of 10 Euro. They actually addressed me on the street for it. :-D Also, it is possible to get anonymous prepaid cards. This way you have a throw-away number at low costs, suitable for phone calls and SMS messages. That will do until trust allows for communication over your default phone line.

Cheers, Jo

(in reply to wittynamehere)
Profile   Post #: 149
RE: How do YOU find out your online aquaintance is not ... - 8/3/2010 12:40:38 AM   
JoJohannsson


Posts: 30
Joined: 12/27/2008
Status: offline
Thank you for this invaluable post!
quote:

ORIGINAL: WyldHrt

Sigh, where to start...
quote:

I'm assuming that they don't troll the message forums, so here are some of the telltale signs:

The good ones, and the bosses that run scammer gangs do, in fact peruse the message boards of sites they are 'working'. Most low level scammers know nothing at all about WIITWD, and out themselves early on. The better ones come to the forums to learn enough about it to sound credible, at least to someone who does not suspect that they are being 'worked'.

This is why I do not like to see lists like this (sorry, Steven) or information on email services that strip IPs posted on open forums. Not all scammers are stupid, and some will learn how to 'improve' their profiles and/or skills from posts such as these. Personally, I prefer to let the scammers keep making the mistakes that make them easy to spot.

Information on tracking IPs is valuable, although it can be misused. I will suggest that anyone concerned about being tracked by IP go here:
http://www.whatismyip.com
and click the IP address lookup tool on the left side of the page. Mine tracks to a town about 20 miles away. The biggest danger is to those who send emails from work, as most private internet access uses dynamic rather than static IP addresses. Companies, particularly large ones, tend to have a static IP address, meaning that the IP does not change and is often easily traced. Send an email using yahoo from your office at lunch, and the person you sent it to could know where you work in about 5 minutes if the company has a dedicated IP.

On photos, yes, they can be faked. I've seen both truly hilarious attempts, and ones that were so good it was almost impossible to tell. Keep in mind that scammers usually ask their victims for things like passport scans, driver's license scans, and yes, pictures of themselves, sometimes holding a paper with something written on it. This usually happens with 419 scams, as those victims are more willing to send such things.

All of these items are kept, shared (or sold) and used to convince other victims that the scammer is 'real'. I had one poor booger's passport scan sent to me by at least 5 different scammers, and I know of a cancer victim whose blog (photos included) detailing his battle was stolen and is still being used by scammers running 'dying of cancer' 419 scams, years after his death. I personally dealt with a love scam victim who was fooled by a driver's license scan and photos that turned out to belong to someone the scammer had victimized in a 419 the year before. All of this is why sending a photo of yourself holding a paper or any such thing to someone you aren't very sure of is a bad idea. I hope I don't even have to mention that sending a passport or driver's license scan to anyone over the internet is just nuts.

quote:

Dragon, I agree, Collarme should charge $10 or $15 per month just to keep out a lot of the phoneys and tv's on the trol.
That way I wouldn't be getting 6-8 messages per week from "Ghana" from women wanting to "be your slave for life if you'll only send me $1,000 to relocate" and tv's who want me to tell them "what I'll do to them if they're naughty."
A monthly fee would keep out a lot of those assholes.

I've said this before and will say it again. The result of things like this is often that you wind up attracting better quality scammers. The more successful ones actually prefer pay sites, as many of the people on those sites believe that the fees keep the scammers out. It's often easier to hook a victim that thinks they are on a 'safe' site.

As for why the scammers don't mind spending the money for a pay site, they aren't using their money at all. The same gangs that run internet scams also run mass phishing operations, stealing credit card numbers and paypal account logins from anyone gullible enough to fall for it. Those credit cards and paypal accounts are used for many things, including memberships to dating sites. They are also used by love scammers to purchase things like small gifts and flowers, another common technique used to make a victim feel safe and convince them that the scammer is 'real'. If a pay site profile is shut down, the scammer is out nothing at all. As on a free site, they just make a new one.

In the end, the only thing that will keep you (general) from being scammed is you.
Internet scamming is a huge business that involves billions (yes, billions) of dollars per year. The way the money is moved around is often very sophisticated, and something I have written about here before. Some scams are easy to spot, while others are much more difficult.

A good love scammer will sometimes spend months cultivating a relationship with his (yes, scammers are overwhelmingly male) victim before going for the pay out. Others won't ever ask for money directly, preferring to either run a check scam or use their victims as mules for fake checks and stolen goods purchased with phished credit cards.

Anyone who thinks that scamming begins and ends with the guy pecking away at a keyboard in a Nigerian internet cafe is seriously mistaken. There are some excellent websites on the net that go into great detail about the extent of the problem, and how to spot some of the more sophisticated scams.
[/end Scammer 101]









Jo

(in reply to WyldHrt)
Profile   Post #: 150
RE: How do YOU find out your online aquaintance is not ... - 8/3/2010 1:05:04 AM   
JoJohannsson


Posts: 30
Joined: 12/27/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: CynthiaWVirginia
...but first, I will have to figure out things like..."command" "web service" "email client" vs "web interface."  I do know what an enter key is though...and I finally learned I can use refresh by pushing that pesky F5 button instead of using the mouse as I've been doing for over ten years.


Sweety, COMMANDS you should know! :-D

Actually, "command" is usually used for a program you "call" on the command line (think DOS, or in Unix, Linux, MacOS X: shell). That (usually) black screen where you type in white letters (may be a window with black on white, too ;-) - If you are using Windows XP, for example, go to [Start] -> Execute program (? exact wording may differ, I see German Windows PCs mostly, using Linux myself here). There type "cmd" and ENTER. You get a black window type "dir". This command shows a listing of the files in the current directory. In earlier versions of windows there was also a "help" command available that would list available commands and offer explanations on what they do. But if you want real COMMAND fun, you will have to try something like Linux ;-)

* Command line interface: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Command-line_interface
* Email Client: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Email_Client
* Webmail Interface: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Webmail
* Web Interface: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Web_interface#Types

If you are using Firefox, try [Ctrl]+[+], [Ctrl]+[-], [Ctrl]+[0]
If not, get it from www.mozilla.org ;-)

quote:

ORIGINAL: CynthiaWVirginia

Yes, I paid for some college.  Took a class on computers, and surprise surprise it didn't actually involve puting my fingers on a single keyboard...I passed with a B, lol.


Unf***ingbelievable! :-D And I thought German schools were going crappy nowadays!

quote:

ORIGINAL: CynthiaWVirginia
What if I have been in Yahoo chat with someone but haven't exchanged yahoo emails?  Can I do that through YIM?  My computer is an old thing, and the only way I can access YIM is through something called Meebo.  Since we are derailing your thread, feel free to send more info into my mailbox.  Explain as one would...to a very young child, lol.


Chat is a totally different thing. A flow of data packages will be going in and out of your network connection. You will need to analyse this data with a special network tool. Not feasible until you have passed network-wizardry 101 with an A ;-)

quote:

ORIGINAL: CynthiaWVirginia
Back on topic...


Indeed.

quote:

ORIGINAL: CynthiaWVirginia
It's all in the tone of voice, actually.  That intimate, new girlfriend voice. 


Okay, crap! I cannot fake that new girlfriend voice!
Wait a sec! This means the (male) faker cannot do this either! ;-)
=> Phone call = perfect way of verification! :-D
(unless, of course, the scammer is a pro and has a female employee for just these calls)

quote:

ORIGINAL: CynthiaWVirginia
This is just my way with subs, not with bottoms.


What differentiates subs from bottoms?
I was not aware these terms were used differently.
I thought bottom was a more general term comprising subs and slaves.

quote:

ORIGINAL: CynthiaWVirginia
 
For the first few times someone is scening with you, mark them.  Some cologne on their clothing, some of your hairs on their clothing (mine is long and blonde), when they're spacing and out of it use a permanent marker to write your name or something on their body.  If you have been tickling them with this with the cap on, while they are blindfolded, as well as doing something else with your other hand like spanking, they won't think anything of it.  If a hubby sees your initials on her butt or shoulder, she's in trouble. 


I love these! Especially the one with the marker! :-)
Will have to try that out when the opportunity occurs!

Cheers, Jo

(in reply to CynthiaWVirginia)
Profile   Post #: 151
RE: How do YOU find out your online aquaintance is not ... - 8/3/2010 1:07:27 AM   
JoJohannsson


Posts: 30
Joined: 12/27/2008
Status: offline
Thanks for the great list, MstrBPK

quote:

ORIGINAL: MstrPBK
1) they insist on having me put them on my messenger before we have even chatted.
2) they avoid questions that were asked, and then change the subject
3) they don't keep track of past conversations, and how they interrelate.
4) they attempt to control the goals of the proposed relationship.
5a) they talk
5b) in fragments
5c) in each conversation
5d) without making
5e) reference to what
5f) they are talking about
5g) as a whole.
6) they take information in and never respond to what is being said (this is different than a doormat slave)
7) they come and go as they wish without warning.
8) their stories change over time ...

do I need to go on?

MstrPBK
St. Paul, MN USA



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Profile   Post #: 152
RE: How do YOU find out your online aquaintance is not ... - 8/3/2010 1:12:48 AM   
JoJohannsson


Posts: 30
Joined: 12/27/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: angelikaJ
I was a bit of a collarme anomally


Indeed. :-D
May be because you are not a top who can be asked for "travel money"?

quote:

ORIGINAL: angelikaJ
I wrote about my profound and barely consolable grief at having missed the "fakes" experience here:
http://www.collarchat.com/m_2774994/mpage_1/key_Fakes/tm.htm#2774994


Thanks for the fun reading! :-D

quote:

ORIGINAL: angelikaJ
I am still recovering from the disappointment.


I can understand your pains and pitty you deeply!

Jo

(in reply to angelikaJ)
Profile   Post #: 153
RE: How do YOU find out your online aquaintance is not ... - 8/3/2010 1:16:47 AM   
JoJohannsson


Posts: 30
Joined: 12/27/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: reynardfox
Aw! did somebody get left feeling all left out then?
Real the profiles properly, then start communicating.
Hate all these posts whining about fakers, do yourself a favour and try not to show the the whole BDSM world how pathetically needy you are.


Reynard,

where have I been whining about fakes?
I am just looking to reduce the time I spend weeding them out of my communication.
I think this is a rather rational approach.

If you don't like the topic, why not just ignore it?

And by the way: go try to insult somewhere else. That is truly pathetic.

Cheers, Jo

(in reply to reynardfox)
Profile   Post #: 154
RE: How do YOU find out your online aquaintance is not ... - 8/3/2010 1:20:57 AM   
KMsAngel


Posts: 17415
Joined: 4/13/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly
quote:

ORIGINAL: myotherself
quote:

ORIGINAL: wandersalone
I would never do any of what you insist on above.  Instead I would do what might seem a little out there but I say...hey let's have a coffee and then I see if a person turns up and bingo...they are real. I realise that this may not work for others ....

I'm with Wanders on this one. If someone is too far away to meet me for a coffee, then they're too far away to consider a relationship with.
this...

*sniffle*

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Profile   Post #: 155
RE: How do YOU find out your online aquaintance is not ... - 8/3/2010 1:26:33 AM   
WyldHrt


Posts: 6412
Joined: 6/5/2008
Status: offline
quote:

Thank you for this invaluable post!

You're welcome. I spent quite a bit of time learning about how these scams work, and am happy to pass along a bit of what I know.



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Profile   Post #: 156
RE: How do YOU find out your online aquaintance is not ... - 8/3/2010 1:57:17 AM   
realwhiteknight


Posts: 428
Joined: 7/13/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MstrPBK

1) they insist on having me put them on my messenger before we have even chatted.
2) they avoid questions that were asked, and then change the subject
3) they don't keep track of past conversations, and how they interrelate.
4) they attempt to control the goals of the proposed relationship.
5a) they talk
5b) in fragments
5c) in each conversation
5d) without making
5e) reference to what
5f) they are talking about
5g) as a whole.
6) they take information in and never respond to what is being said (this is different than a doormat slave)
7) they come and go as they wish without warning.
8) their stories change over time ...

do I need to go on?


I'm sleepy....just some random musings:

1. Like 25% of the men who email me ask for my messenger ID in their opening email. The last one told me it's so he can tell i I'm 'real' or not.
2. People in real life do this, including men.
3. Why bother with that person then? They are either stupid or a bot. Either way...
4. Just creepy.
5. Creepy also. You can't lose by ditching that now, can you?
6. Isn't the essence of human communication talking, and responding to what is said?
7. Maybe their wifi dropped..happens to me all the time.
8. If 1 through 7 aren't enough to creep you out, you deserve all the insanity and disappointment a Ghanian can throw at you.

Also, I'd like to add a really, really important one. If you're not objectively attractive, and young, why in god's green earth would a 21yo model have the time to talk to you, LET ALONE as a prospective sex partner? Hell, *I* don't have time or interest to talk to most of you. I mean, you HAVE TO know you're asking for trouble. No one could *actually* be that stupid.

I tend to think, based on my experience, most of you overrate yourselves or really ARE so deluded as to think it will be that easy to find a model who has nothing else to do but talk to below average-looking strangers on the internet about sex and then meet then for nsa random, anal and oral penetration, bondage, etc. etc. As far as I'm concerned, you all deserve EXACTLY the amount of crap you get, having to wade through on here (I know, 97% of profiles are fake).

Flame on, see what I care.





< Message edited by realwhiteknight -- 8/3/2010 2:04:35 AM >


_____________________________

I carry a log - yes. Is it funny to you? It is not to me.

Behind all things are reasons. Reasons can even explain the absurd. Do we have the time to learn the reasons behind the human being's varied behavior? I think not. Some take the time.

(in reply to MstrPBK)
Profile   Post #: 157
RE: How do YOU find out your online aquaintance is not ... - 8/3/2010 3:24:49 AM   
CynthiaWVirginia


Posts: 1915
Joined: 2/28/2010
From: West Virginia, USA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: JoJohannsson
Sweety, COMMANDS you should know! :-D

LOL, yeah, my computer is really impressed when I threaten to spank it with a paddle if it misbehaves.  (Don't I wish...)

quote:


quote:

ORIGINAL: CynthiaWVirginia
It's all in the tone of voice, actually.  That intimate, new girlfriend voice. 


Okay, crap! I cannot fake that new girlfriend voice!
Wait a sec! This means the (male) faker cannot do this either! ;-)
=> Phone call = perfect way of verification! :-D
(unless, of course, the scammer is a pro and has a female employee for just these calls)
Just a message in such a voice that she cannot possibly tell hubby or live in love that you were just a bill collector or her friend's new boyfriend.

quote:


quote:

ORIGINAL: CynthiaWVirginia
This is just my way with subs, not with bottoms.


What differentiates subs from bottoms?
I was not aware these terms were used differently.
I thought bottom was a more general term comprising subs and slaves.

I use them differently, to distinguish between those I top, and those I have an emotional/mental power exchange going on with.  Sorry to have caused any confusion. 

 
quote:


quote:

ORIGINAL: CynthiaWVirginia
 
For the first few times someone is scening with you, mark them.  Some cologne on their clothing, some of your hairs on their clothing (mine is long and blonde), when they're spacing and out of it use a permanent marker to write your name or something on their body.  If you have been tickling them with this with the cap on, while they are blindfolded, as well as doing something else with your other hand like spanking, they won't think anything of it.  If a hubby sees your initials on her butt or shoulder, she's in trouble. 


I love these! Especially the one with the marker! :-)
Will have to try that out when the opportunity occurs!

The light, random tickling is kinda fun too.

 
Best wishes, and I hope the phone calls you have with her end up being good ones.

(in reply to JoJohannsson)
Profile   Post #: 158
RE: How do YOU find out your online aquaintance is not ... - 8/3/2010 5:37:11 AM   
thishereboi


Posts: 14463
Joined: 6/19/2008
Status: offline
quote:

Thus my post did exactly what I intended for it to do!


In your first post you claimed that after talking through emails for a bit, you make them send a topless pic. Then when people pointed out that that wouldn't work for them. You acted all offended and switched around your story. Now if your post was intended to make you look like a flake, then yes, I agree, it did exactly that.


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Profile   Post #: 159
RE: How do YOU find out your online aquaintance is not ... - 8/3/2010 7:09:28 AM   
Hillwilliam


Posts: 19394
Joined: 8/27/2008
Status: offline
A couple of other ways to spot scammers that are a bit subtle.

I havent read this whole thread (just most of it) so if anyone has already mentioned these, please accept apologies in advance.

1.  The picture is obviously a white person but the ethnicity says "Native American"  Evidently, African scammers think that "native american" means born in the US.

2. The height and weight dont match, i.e. 5'6 and 66#.  Most Most African scammers live in countries where the metric system is prevalent and they dont know how to multiply by 2.2 to do the conversion from kilos to pounds.

I hope that helps.

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