RE: When your partner wants to do something squicky... (Full Version)

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Proprietrix -> RE: When your partner wants to do something squicky... (4/19/2006 1:10:17 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: broadline
What was practised in ancient Greece was pederasty, not pedophilia. There's a difference, and it is important.


Isn't pederasty (man having sex with boy) just one kind of pedophilia (adult having sex with child)?
So technically, if pederasty was practiced in ancient Greece, by default, pedophilia was practiced in ancient Greece. (Kind of like.... If a poodle is in the chair, by default, a dog is in the chair.)



cillydom -> RE: When your partner wants to do something squicky... (4/19/2006 2:11:50 PM)

thanks you saved me from wasting time



murmur -> RE: When your partner wants to do something squicky... (4/19/2006 2:42:58 PM)

I think pederasty is just another word for homosexuals...but i could be wrong (search the dictionnary).



Proprietrix -> RE: When your partner wants to do something squicky... (4/19/2006 3:11:12 PM)

pederasty
ped[image]http://cache.lexico.com/dictionary/graphics/AHD4/GIF/prime.gif[/image]er·as[image]http://cache.lexico.com/dictionary/graphics/AHD4/GIF/lprime.gif[/image]ty
n : sexual relations between a man and a boy (usually anal intercourse with the boy as a passive partner)
 
pederasty

 • noun sexual intercourse between a man and a boy.
 — DERIVATIVES pederast noun pederastic adjective.
 — ORIGIN Greek paiderastia, from pais ‘boy’ + erastes ‘lover’.
"sodomy with a boy," 1609, from Mod.L. pæderastia, from Gk. paiderastia



murmur -> RE: When your partner wants to do something squicky... (4/19/2006 3:29:17 PM)

yup, i was wrong. my fault.



broadline -> RE: When your partner wants to do something squicky... (4/19/2006 4:07:46 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Proprietrix

pederasty
ped[image]http://cache.lexico.com/dictionary/graphics/AHD4/GIF/prime.gif[/image]er·as[image]http://cache.lexico.com/dictionary/graphics/AHD4/GIF/lprime.gif[/image]ty
n : sexual relations between a man and a boy (usually anal intercourse with the boy as a passive partner)
 
pederasty

• noun sexual intercourse between a man and a boy.
— DERIVATIVES pederast noun pederastic adjective.
— ORIGIN Greek paiderastia, from pais ‘boy’ + erastes ‘lover’.
"sodomy with a boy," 1609, from Mod.L. pæderastia, from Gk. paiderastia


Main Entry: pe·do·phil·ia
Pronunciation: "pEd-&-'fil-E-&, "ped-
Variant: or chiefly British pae·do·phil·ia /"pEd-/
Function: noun
: sexual perversion in which children are the preferred sexual object
 
Pederasty isn't a type of pedophilia, it's different.
 
This discussion is a little off-top for both the thread and the forum, so I'm not going to get into a detailed explanation. Suffice to say, I think both are ethically indefensible. But they're not the same thing.



MizSuz -> RE: When your partner wants to do something squicky... (4/19/2006 4:26:19 PM)

I definitely have a squick factor (ANYTHING having to do with whatever might come out of a nose, for example).

I also have a pretty serious ability to steel myself against a lot of things that would just bug a lot of folks out, and plod through.  Usually I think about how happy I am that it's not anything to do with the above given example.  But if the squik factor is pegging out I'd tell them to have fun with it, they can even tell me about it without too much detail later (that would be my compromise with a mind to "share") and not participate.



Cloudz -> RE: When your partner wants to do something squicky... (4/19/2006 6:07:02 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: DelightMachine

As a submissive, it's real simple: I do whatever she wants me to do that doesn't violate my few hard rules -- essentially, nothing I find dangerous, immoral or that shock or really disturb vanilla people (if they're around) or that violate my outward conservative appearance (no Mohawk haircut, for instance).

"Squicky" things with me specifically don't count. It's an expression of my submissiveness to do them for her. So far I haven't been asked to do anything I find too difficult or disgusting, and I'm pretty sure in most things, my disgust level has been well below (above?) that of any owner I've had -- meaning I'm more willing to do it or experience it than they are.  


Hmmm...Thinking I need to turn the squick level up on you puppy....



TemptingNviceSub -> RE: When your partner wants to do something squicky... (4/19/2006 8:04:11 PM)

To Cillydom..just because it was accepted or practised in the past does not make it acceptable by todays morays..and to that I mean pedophilia..come on!..there can never be any informed consent there! and if you meant pederasty..! with an adult whatever..but never child!..and if I misread you intent ..my apologies...To the OP..Love squicky..gonna use it now..being a nurse I see so much squicky things.(grin)..Hypotheticially if squickey was requested of me..I would sit and discuss such with my Dominant,find the whys and wherefors..if he were willing to supply such..because as we all know..you will be pushed as a sub to expand horizons and what may be squicky at one time may not be at another in your life.So if it does not violate my hard limits...and I do not vomit..I guess I would attempt to give it a try once.....I think...[:'(]...grin....Tempting



Proprietrix -> RE: When your partner wants to do something squicky... (4/19/2006 8:15:54 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: TemptingNviceSub
So if it does not violate my hard limits...and I do not vomit..I guess I would attempt to give it a try once.....I think...[:'(]...grin....Tempting


I used to have a play group a few hours away. A few of us were into a lot of needle play, body modification, blood sports, etc... When someone new came to play (knowing what kind of play we did!) and experience their first "try at it", they would sometimes (as can be typical) start getting nauseous and sometimes even vomit. But normally, once they recomposed themselves, they'd want to continue.
One of our mottos in that particular clique became "Just because you throw up, doesn't mean the scene has to end!"
(Of course when we said that motto in regular munch groups, we kind of got odd looks.)



cillydom -> RE: When your partner wants to do something squicky... (4/19/2006 8:18:24 PM)

you misread it



cariad -> RE: When your partner wants to do something squicky... (4/19/2006 8:23:07 PM)

"Pederasty"

girl looked it up and this is what she found:

*** The Collaborative International Dictionary of English v.0.48 ***
Pederasty \Ped"er*as`ty\, n. [Gr. paiderasti`a: cf. F.
p['e]d['e]rastie.]
Sexual activity between two males; sodomy; the "crime against
nature"; -- used especially when one partner is a boy.

Note: The term "crime against nature" to refer to homosexual
activity is now (2002) seldom used except by religious
conservatives. It was in the 1913 Webster, and is left
here for historical purposes.
[1913 Webster + PJC]



IndigoDadesi -> RE: When your partner wants to do something squicky... (4/19/2006 11:26:07 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Proprietrix
The creepy uncle who wants the little girl to sit on his knee way too much - squicks me out.
Having sexual encounters with eels - kinda squicky.
A stranger who greatly resembles someone on the FBI's most wanted - quick squick.
Michael Jackson - slight squicker.
And seeing someone hock a lugie and then suck it back into their mouth before it touches the ground - definitely squicks me out.


Ew gross! Now thats all I can think about.[:'(]



RiotGirl -> RE: When your partner wants to do something squicky... (4/20/2006 3:30:35 AM)

Interesting usuage of the word.  i kind of like it.  What do you do?  You grit your teeth and do it, but then i'm a slave so i sort of have too.  Grit your teeth, suck it up and go through it the best you can, it gets easier the more it happens and over time.  



LuckyAlbatross -> RE: When your partner wants to do something squicky... (4/20/2006 5:54:10 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: RiotGirl
You grit your teeth and do it, but then i'm a slave so i sort of have too. 

Yes, if the master says "do it" then it gets done. 

But what about when the master says ""This is something I'm interested in, but I want your input and I want to get your read on this, and if it's something you feel is to squicky, then it's not important enough."?

Then we're back to the original question.

For example, for a lot of masters if he asks you "Where do you want to go to dinner slave?  I'm up for Chinese but if you have a preference, then I'm ok with that." 

If the slave then LIES and says that they would prefer Chinese when they would actually prefere Italian, or tries a copout answer of "Whatever you want master" it would be considered VERY bad behavior in a lot of relationships.  The master wants to know something and will make the decision that the master wants to make.  The fact that the submissive is allowed a voice and is part of the process doesn't change the ultimate authority.



ownedgirlie -> RE: When your partner wants to do something squicky... (4/20/2006 11:39:29 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

quote:

ORIGINAL: RiotGirl
You grit your teeth and do it, but then i'm a slave so i sort of have too. 

Yes, if the master says "do it" then it gets done. 

But what about when the master says ""This is something I'm interested in, but I want your input and I want to get your read on this, and if it's something you feel is to squicky, then it's not important enough."?

Then we're back to the original question.

For example, for a lot of masters if he asks you "Where do you want to go to dinner slave?  I'm up for Chinese but if you have a preference, then I'm ok with that." 

If the slave then LIES and says that they would prefer Chinese when they would actually prefere Italian, or tries a copout answer of "Whatever you want master" it would be considered VERY bad behavior in a lot of relationships.  The master wants to know something and will make the decision that the master wants to make.  The fact that the submissive is allowed a voice and is part of the process doesn't change the ultimate authority.


Totally agree with this.  If he wants my honest input, then i am not only required to give it, but i am grateful for the privilege.  i have many times been asked about my thoughts on something "squicky" without any additional input from him as to whether it is something he likes, wants, hates, etc.  my job at that point is to tell him, "The thought of that makes me feel......(insert feeling/response/reaction here) because......(insert reason here.)." 

The "whatever you want, Master" response ONLY applies if the question is, "If I told you to do such and such, what would you do?"  my reply at that point would be, "i would do whatever you want, and if it means such and such, then that is what i will do."



RiotGirl -> RE: When your partner wants to do something squicky... (4/20/2006 1:53:48 PM)

quote:

But what about when the master says ""This is something I'm interested in, but I want your input and I want to get your read on this, and if it's something you feel is to squicky, then it's not important enough."?

Then we're back to the original question.

For example, for a lot of masters if he asks you "Where do you want to go to dinner slave? I'm up for Chinese but if you have a preference, then I'm ok with that."


As lame as it sounds, try and figure out what he wanted and then take that route.  Or just explaining that i'm indecisive and why i am indecisive.  As i usually am and its pretty easy for me to get stuck in indecision.

And actually my answer is still the same to the original question.  Suck it up and grin and bear it, but then i'm very well aware of how he feels about something.  If its not from conversations long past or something he's said recently i just can generally tell what he wants.  Which then i try and go along, or suck it up and grin and bear it, its cos i dont want him to miss out because of me.  Plenty of things that he's given me the option to opt out of, plenty of things he hasnt.  i think, by opting out, i would feel like i've disapointed him some way.  And he knows when i do this.  Its usually written right across my face.  He also knows there are some things i cant push myself to "suck up" so he helps push me.  LOL by giving me no options.  But generallly that is only reserved for pushing physically.  All mental pushing he lets me do.  i think.. er i dunno.  lol



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