quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

When someone says service sub I think of domestic duties; cleaning, cooking, gardening, etc.
Use for me conveys sexual only. "Looking for someone to use hard" doesn't say he is interested in whether or not she can make Chicken Kiev. It says sex on demand, no matter how she may feel at that time.

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ORIGINAL: CelticPrince

What say you?

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ORIGINAL: juliaoceania
I don't know, there is something very sexy about a man I am into saying he wants me to "service" him sexually. It is a proper use of English to say that, and there is something about the way those words come together that is kinda hot and works for me. But I also like the way being "used" sounds...

In my mind, if you like the way a phrase comes together and it arouses you or your partner, who cares if it works for anyone else or what they think of it? The question in my mind is simply this, are you here for others and their opinions, or are you here because of what works for you?

If you want to know what others think about the terms "service" and "use", ask them. If their answers don't jive with your own, decide if you can accept that, try to change their minds, or move on to a suitable partner

quote:

I find those terms quite ambiguous as they literally can mean many things, personally when i use the term 'use' i mean it in regards to many areas..sexual use, s&m use yet 'service' i tend to think of as on a more practical level whether this be preparing drinks or cleaning etc.....but really they are much the same thing.

Not sure if that all makes much sense.

tori

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I'd have to say that I go along with that. My general definition of service tends to be those things that the sub does that are not play or sexually oriented. Most Dominant females on these boards will tell you how often their eyes roll to the back of their head when male s-types believe that 'service' involves them bending over in some way and they actually think they are offering something that we couldn't get any where else. It's a pretty broad term by most standards.

"Use" I do tend to think of those areas involving physical sex. I don't really link it to topping/bottoming in a S/m sense, as I don't hear the term connected with such things as BDSM play alone.

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I look at them as the same actions through different eyes. I see service as what a sub offers and use as what a Dom accepts.

DS,

Huh? grins, I will have to ponder that for a bit.

CP

(in reply to DarkSteven)

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I'd have to say I go along with Lady P on this one, at least for me.

When I speak of a submissive performing service for me, I think of things such as researching various articles for things I need for the latest class I am preparing or getting me drinks, etc.

When I think of a submissive being used by me, it is more about what I want to do for my pleasure and that usually involves a sexual and/or BDSM aspect. That doesn't mean that she won't get pleasure out of it also but when we are referring to what is being done as "use", it is more about me than her.

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The terms don't relay much, unless you converse further. "Use" or "Service" can mean both sexual and non sexual to me. I have served sexually before (served as a sexual purpose, served myself sexually, etc.) but I've also served drinks before. I have been used sexually before, but I've also been used as a maid before.

Both terms can apply across the board, to me.

NV,

Damn just when I thought I had clarity; the fog settles in again.......just kidding and congrats on your new life.

CP

(in reply to NuevaVida)

quote:

When someone says service sub I think of domestic duties; cleaning, cooking, gardening, etc.
Use for me conveys sexual only. "Looking for someone to use hard" doesn't say he is interested in whether or not she can make Chicken Kiev. It says sex on demand, no matter how she may feel at that time.