LadyNTrainer
Posts: 1584
Joined: 5/20/2009
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quote:
ORIGINAL: sfguy1
I have been asked by a Domme who expects to have both a male slave and a female slave, whether the Domme would likely have better success in securing her female slave by the Domme directly herself. Or might the Domme get a better result by having her male slave to be charged to obtain the female slave? Obviously the Domme would save time by having the male slave obtain the female slave. But the Domme is asking a different question: Would She likely get a better result by having the male slave obtain the female slave, or by having the Domme directly attracting the female slave?
The Domme also asks whether the male slave should obtain the female slave for himself but then transfer the slave to the Domme -- that a real slave would accept the transfer. What is your advice here?
Ugh. This is a classic example of what tends to not work, for some pretty spectacularly horrific values of not work, in poly.
Poly D/s relationships involving multiple people can and do work, but they work when everyone in them is willing to spend time and energy communicating and building a solid foundation of trust in the relationship. They tend to implode horribly in ugly drama when people try to substitute the "rules" of D/s, usually cribbed from unrealistic fantasies or a bad porno stereotype, for the basic rules of healthy human relationships and communication. D/s is a complement to a human relationship, not a replacement for it.
You will probably never find a human being who can sustain a healthy, stable, long term intimate and intense D/s relationship with a random person whom they basically don't know. That's mostly because human relationships don't work that way, not because every person you find is not "a real slave". You're going to be going through "slaves" like used Kleenex, because realistically *no one* is going to be able to live up to that expectation.
If you think that being kinky means that the stuff that just doesn't work so well in human relationships is suddenly going to automatically work for you, or that being a slave or a Master/Mistress is a substitute for taking the time to get to know someone and build a relationship of trust and honesty, you're living in a bad porn movie. Pull your head out of the porn set and think harder about how to build relationships in the real world, or you're likely to have a whole lot of drama and no relationship in very short order.
This is assuming this whole thing isn't a fantasy troll of some kind, which wouldn't surprise me either. The bullshit is piled so high and deep here that I could probably grow corn in it.
< Message edited by LadyNTrainer -- 1/26/2011 1:49:50 PM >
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RE: Most Effective Way for Domme to Attract Female Slave - 
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