RE: Deal Breakers (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive



Message


kuppykake -> RE: Deal Breakers (8/31/2010 7:41:01 AM)

Here are my 3 main deal breakers:
1)  too cocky (you know what I mean!)... I can't stand a man who has his head up his own ass.
2)  JEALOUSY... perhaps this is where I differ from many people.  I am a brutally honest person.  If a man accuses me, he better have a DAMN good reason, or bye bye!!!
3)  dishonesty... the man I'm with should have absolutely nothing to hide, and neither shall I




asilentscream -> RE: Deal Breakers (8/31/2010 9:01:14 AM)

Here's my list. A lot of the main ones have been said already, dishonesty, cheating, etc. But I'd like to add these:

Total selfishness, a little is fine, but when it gets to the point that a dominant demands extreme lengths for something that would give her the teeniest benefit or convenience without any thought to how much trouble the sub has to go through or the risk, it's deal breaker, which leads me into:

Not respecting or totally ignoring personal lines

Thoughtlessness or extreme carelessness

Money demands is a deal breaker for me. I don't mind buying things for a domme, but when it becomes a condition for even cordial conversation, parting ways is very mutual typically

Blackmail, at least the real stuff, roleplaying is a different story

Involving other guys in play, this includes trannies or those who were born with non-female parts

This kind of goes back to one's I've already mentioned, but ultimatums and coersion where the demands are things that intentionally cross my lines, especially if there's no obvious benefit to the domme except blackmail fodder or my lines being crossed seemingly for the sake of it

And also alcoholism or drug dependency, 420 is perfectly acceptable

Plus others I may have forgotten to mention.




NuevaVida -> RE: Deal Breakers (8/31/2010 9:47:37 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist

I don't wanna' be fucking my bitch while she is buns up kneeling and have to stare at Freddy's name on her ass.  Having someone's property mark that isn't mine, like a name tattooed or a brand, just sits wrong with me.  It would be like looking at used cars and one of them was covered with old corporate logos and advertising.  Who would want to own that?


Apparently my owner did, thank God.  It's not the ex's name on my ass, but an insignia he created. So what my owner did was take hold of it, kiss it, and make it his.  We simply consider it a battle scar, and have recently decided that, in time, we'll convert it to something else.

If the goods are worth owning, the decorations on such goods can be altered.




PDXBRAT -> RE: Deal Breakers (9/1/2010 8:11:18 AM)

Bad teeth
picky eaters
gambling addiction
emotional fucktards
married, seperated, anything other than completely single
lying of any kind
must like dogs
couch potato
lack of basic social skills

the deal breaker I experience most commonly is the jackass type who goes from "Nice to meet you" to "how much do you like it in the ass?" within about 5 minutes. Maybe I am over sensitive - but that's a deal breaker.




slaveluci -> RE: Deal Breakers (9/1/2010 5:40:08 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: NuevaVida

quote:

ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist

I don't wanna' be fucking my bitch while she is buns up kneeling and have to stare at Freddy's name on her ass.  Having someone's property mark that isn't mine, like a name tattooed or a brand, just sits wrong with me.  It would be like looking at used cars and one of them was covered with old corporate logos and advertising.  Who would want to own that?


Apparently my owner did, thank God.  It's not the ex's name on my ass, but an insignia he created. So what my owner did was take hold of it, kiss it, and make it his.  We simply consider it a battle scar, and have recently decided that, in time, we'll convert it to something else.

If the goods are worth owning, the decorations on such goods can be altered.


Same here! My ex-husband was a wonderful artist who personally put a rather large tattoo on me. Master has never seen it as something that had to be erased. We see it as a symbol of me at another time - perhaps a battle scar (nice term) - but really not so much. It's beautiful artwork frankly and there are no names. We discussed covering it with something else at one point but have never followed through. It's not something He sees as threatening or shameful and, frankly, we really don't focus on it..........luci




sothernnyte -> RE: Deal Breakers (9/2/2010 11:24:01 AM)

deal breakers


lying- just be honest, i might be open to it

heterosexuality- i will not participate sexually with a male

religion is fine..but dont expect that i may agree with everything about yours nor expect you to agree with everything about mine

i'm not a doormat, don't take my shyness for such

abuse- yes i am a masochist, no i will not be abused

do not assume because i am poly that i am promiscuous

personal values and morals- i have my own, they won't change to match yours

respect- you get what you give




juliaoceania -> RE: Deal Breakers (9/2/2010 11:55:33 AM)

Lying
Poly
Smoker
Conservative
Avid gun owner/Hunter
Angry
Cruel
Self centered




itsmeinLV -> RE: Deal Breakers (9/2/2010 7:30:00 PM)

When the love just isn't there between us anymore.  Lying about cheating and/or cheating and then lying are deal breakers.  




wandersalone -> RE: Deal Breakers (9/3/2010 6:30:19 AM)

my biggies have already been mentioned - married, lying etc

Another important one for me is that I have to have someone who not only accepts my career but supports me in my advancement




inkSecret -> RE: Deal Breakers (9/3/2010 10:33:13 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: littleone35

Today i was thinking what would be a deal breaker for different peiople , so i thought i wouls throw this out there. If you found out yur Master was married and his wife did not know what would be the bigger deal breaker the cheating or the lie? Just an example i would like to know what your deal breakers are. I Know some will be the same some very different.

My deal breakers are lies. If he lies to me then hoe can i ever trust him agan. Not that i have to worry about that my Master would never lie to me. Some people might see smoking as a hard limit my Master smokes but it is just a part of him and i love him so i accept it. I wish he would quit for his health but that has to be his decision to do so.

Don't mind me i go off on tangents. What is your deal breakers?

Matt's littleone


Zombies.

Absolutely, positively, No Zombies.

EDITED TO ADD --> Which pretty much makes up fifty percent of CollarMe xD




BlackTigerDragon -> RE: Deal Breakers (9/4/2010 3:25:11 AM)

This is a really stupid question. Fell free to do anything you want with this post...but from reading this thread...is there a difference between a deal breaker and discrimination?




SubPet715 -> RE: Deal Breakers (9/4/2010 9:37:36 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: PDXBRAT
the deal breaker I experience most commonly is the jackass type who goes from "Nice to meet you" to "how much do you like it in the ass?" within about 5 minutes. Maybe I am over sensitive - but that's a deal breaker.


Would you believe that is also my biggest deal breaker?

Among women, I call it going 0 to 60, when out of no where they assume because a few kind words have been traded that they have carte blanche. It shows little tact and respect for me as a person to assume i'm a sex crazed maniac who will take it where I can get it.




Twoshoes -> RE: Deal Breakers (9/4/2010 9:57:16 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SubPet715
Would you believe that is also my biggest deal breaker?

Among women, I call it going 0 to 60, when out of no where they assume because a few kind words have been traded that they have carte blanche. It shows little tact and respect for me as a person to assume i'm a sex crazed maniac who will take it where I can get it.


I would after I read your journal. I saw your perspective, but mine is different. I'm not sure how much of it has to do with me not being a submissive.




inkSecret -> RE: Deal Breakers (9/4/2010 10:05:37 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SubPet715


quote:

ORIGINAL: PDXBRAT
the deal breaker I experience most commonly is the jackass type who goes from "Nice to meet you" to "how much do you like it in the ass?" within about 5 minutes. Maybe I am over sensitive - but that's a deal breaker.


Would you believe that is also my biggest deal breaker?

Among women, I call it going 0 to 60, when out of no where they assume because a few kind words have been traded that they have carte blanche. It shows little tact and respect for me as a person to assume i'm a sex crazed maniac who will take it where I can get it.


They probably do this to you because there are people like me who are sex-crazed maniacs and try to hit every possible piece of offered ass (under 130lbs) before my heart explodes and I age an extra year.  xD

Male association.

It's like friendly fire.  It's funny to the person firing.




newbie2750 -> RE: Deal Breakers (9/5/2010 1:20:51 AM)

I generally block people quickly when their opening line involves sexual suggestions, a demand for instant submission or a statement that they will, "cure me of my hard limits." They are hard limits for good reasons. Beyond that, I consider the following to be deal breakers in all aspects of my life:

  • Dishonesty;
  • Lack of self-discipline, self-control or self-respect;
  • Smoking or use of illegal drugs;
  • Abuse of alcohol; and
  • Incompatible values.




LadyRian -> RE: Deal Breakers (9/6/2010 7:32:10 PM)

Disrespect. Selfish disregard for my feelings, especially. Dom/mes have those, oh yes we do.

Many of the myriad things other posters have listed already, lying, emotionally unavailable, etc, but the real deal breaker for me is selfishness. Selfishness, and manipulation games.
And a grievous gripe of mine, as a Dominant: Submissives who embarrass me in public with their behaviour, then have the nerve to turn it around on me when told of my displeasure with such.  Behave or begone.




DesFIP -> RE: Deal Breakers (9/7/2010 11:01:33 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: BlackTigerDragon

This is a really stupid question. Fell free to do anything you want with this post...but from reading this thread...is there a difference between a deal breaker and discrimination?


Discrimination is when it is put into public use. Such as not hiring any people of one religion or race. Preference is when you just know that you prefer an intimate relationship with certain people. Deal breakers are hard limits, things we cannot deal with for whatever reason.

One of my deal breakers are cats. I like cats. I like people who are animal people. Unfortunately I am extremely allergic to cats so couldn't live with one. I visit my father who has a cat and need a benedryl that night to handle the allergies. So for me, cat ownership is a deal breaker in an intimate relationship. Now if I played publicly, it wouldn't enter into who I played with at a dungeon because I wouldn't be in the presence of the cat.




HisEvelyn -> RE: Deal Breakers (9/8/2010 7:49:21 PM)

My deal-breakers:

Cheating
Lying
Disliking animals, especially cats (I must have cats, there's no two ways about it)
Narrow-mindedness
Intentional stupidity (being uneducated is fixable. Making a conscious choice to be ignorant and ignore self improvement is a no-go)
Emotional or physical abuse (I love a good cropping till my ass is bruised, but I am NOT a punching bag)
Any form of uncontrolled addiction, be it to substances, gambling, or video games
Lack of empathy
Religious zealotry




ResidentSadist -> RE: Deal Breakers (9/8/2010 8:26:43 PM)

Ok, here are my deal breakers:
1 - They are dead.  Not recently diciest and the body is still warm, but cold dead.
2 - Pubic Hair.  The bush, the joy jungle, the vulva forest, a bearded clam.  I just can't do it... would be like sticking my cock in ZZ Top's mouth.




WaywardsPet -> RE: Deal Breakers (9/9/2010 12:10:41 AM)

I'd like to mirror the same answers other have given but I've been cheated on, I've been lied to, I've been involved with men with anger issues and drug addictions. I've lived through bloody beatings that had nothing to do with BDSM and well...I was too stupid to get out of those relationships so I guess they weren't exactly deal breakers. Of course, these days I might just have gained enough intelligence to know better, helps if you get knocked flat by the common sense fairy.

I think the only deal breaker for me would be someone that didn't read or allow me to read books. I love books with a passion that's been with me my entire life. I can't live without them. Several years ago I tried dating a vanilla man that insisted all my books be kept on the closet floor and whined every time I wanted a new book asking why I didn't just reread the old ones. I like reading a book and then talking with my partner about it, it's something I've always done. When I was little I shared fantasy novels with my father and grandmother, when I was older with all my friends and now Master and i share books (though, not all of them) and greatly enjoy long conversations about them. Although...Mistress Tonya brought up a good point. I draw the line at scat. I see enough of that at work.




Page: <<   < prev  1 2 [3] 4   next >   >>

Valid CSS!




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy
0.03125