Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

Are you Gay ?


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Off the Grid >> Are you Gay ? Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
Are you Gay ? - 8/28/2010 6:13:15 PM   
Aneirin


Posts: 6121
Joined: 3/18/2006
From: Tamaris
Status: offline 		Are you gay is a question I get asked quiet often, mostly by members of my opposite sex, to which I reply no, but I just have to wonder what makes women ask this question. What is going on for women to ask such a thing, do they have an insight or what, what is happening, what do women expect of men to not ask if they are gay or not ?


Fair enough, I have a degree of Aspergers, but it is only mild compared to some, but I get asked if I am gay by women, what is going on ?

_____________________________

Everything we are is the result of what we have thought, the mind is everything, what we think, we become - Guatama Buddha

Conservatism is distrust of people tempered by fear - William Gladstone
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Are you Gay ? - 8/28/2010 6:21:37 PM   
sirsholly


Posts: 42360
Joined: 9/7/2007
From: Quietville
Status: offline 		it is not something i would ask (frankly...it's none of my business)

_____________________________

PICKED UPON
TECHNO-DOLT
MEMBER OF THE SUBBIE MAFIA
GRACEFULLY CHALLENGED :::::splat:::::
BOOT WHORE
VAA/S FAN

GIVES GOOD HEART (Lushy)

CREATOR OF MAYHEM (practice)


(in reply to Aneirin)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Are you Gay ? - 8/28/2010 6:28:38 PM   
poise


Posts: 9509
Joined: 7/3/2010
Status: offline 		If Im preparing dinner for someone, I may ask if they are a vegetarian.
If I plan on becoming intimate with them, I would hope our sexual preferences would have
already become evident so I wouldnt have a need to ask.
Perhaps they have a hidden interest in you and cant fathom why the interest isnt returned?

< Message edited by poise -- 8/28/2010 6:31:36 PM >

_____________________________

When the path ignites a soul, there’s no remaining in place.

(in reply to sirsholly)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Are you Gay ? - 8/28/2010 6:29:08 PM   
DaddysInkedSlut


Posts: 1837
Joined: 5/14/2010
Status: offline 		Even with my close circle of friends, I would not come out and publically ask such a question. I think it shows a lack of tact and respect.

_____________________________


(in reply to sirsholly)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Are you Gay ? - 8/28/2010 6:30:01 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		Do you have a lot of drama in your life?

Have you been single a long time?

Do you walk or talk with flair?

Do you have a deep seated interest in hair products, clothes, cleaning, interior design?

I mean there are a ton of reasons a woman may ask that. I don't know you so it's kinda hard to say one way or the other without knowing more about you.


(in reply to sirsholly)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Are you Gay ? - 8/28/2010 6:32:43 PM   
DaddysInkedSlut


Posts: 1837
Joined: 5/14/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

Do you have a deep seated interest in hair products, clothes, cleaning, interior design?


One of my closest friends lotions every day, irons everything, gets manicures and pedicures, he has a wonderful fashion sense in mens and women clothes. I NEVER once would have assumed that meant he was gay. High maitance yes, gay. No. Lol

< Message edited by DaddysInkedSlut -- 8/28/2010 6:33:42 PM >

_____________________________


(in reply to littlewonder)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Are you Gay ? - 8/28/2010 6:33:24 PM   
tiggerspoohbear


Posts: 19141
Joined: 6/27/2010
Status: offline 		Never would ask, never had to.

Poohbear

_____________________________

"RABBIT IS GOOD, RABBIT IS WISE".

"I'm a baaa-aaad pussycat".


(in reply to littlewonder)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Are you Gay ? - 8/28/2010 6:55:48 PM   
DomImus


Posts: 2004
Joined: 3/17/2009
Status: offline 		What makes them ponder that might be interesting to explore since you say you are asked this quite often.

What makes them ask is simple tackiness and lack of social skills.


_____________________________

"Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable." Sidney J. harris

(in reply to Aneirin)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Are you Gay ? - 8/28/2010 8:25:45 PM   
mstrjx


Posts: 2045
Joined: 11/27/2005
Status: offline 		My mother for the longest time (in my early to mid 20's) would consistently ask me whether I was gay. By this time, our relationship was fairly well on the downhill slide. I never EVER answered to the negative. And of course saying I was would be false (not that I'm against certain types of fibs), but I would consistently throw it back at her.... 'What if I were?' with a really puzzled look on my face.

Ah, those were the days.

Jeff

_____________________________

Know thyself. It's the best gift you can ever give yourself.

(in reply to DomImus)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Are you Gay ? - 8/28/2010 8:48:05 PM   
dcnovice


Posts: 37282
Joined: 8/2/2006
Status: offline 		http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=183l-qkr2_w

_____________________________

No matter how cynical you become,
it's never enough to keep up.

JANE WAGNER, THE SEARCH FOR SIGNS OF
INTELLIGENT LIFE IN THE UNIVERSE

(in reply to mstrjx)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Are you Gay ? - 8/28/2010 9:12:32 PM   
LinnaeaBorealis


Posts: 8595
Joined: 10/5/2008
From: Insanity & beyond
Status: offline 		OMG!!! I love her!!!!!

"Where's my parade???" Slut Pride!!"

_____________________________

Ring the bells that still can ring
Forget your perfect offering
There is a crack in everything
That's how the light gets in
~~L. Cohen

Just one of the yahoo's

(in reply to dcnovice)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Are you Gay ? - 8/28/2010 9:36:51 PM   
pogo4pres


Posts: 593
Joined: 1/14/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Aneirin

Are you gay is a question I get asked quiet often, mostly by members of my opposite sex, to which I reply no, but I just have to wonder what makes women ask this question. What is going on for women to ask such a thing, do they have an insight or what, what is happening, what do women expect of men to not ask if they are gay or not ?


Fair enough, I have a degree of Aspergers, but it is only mild compared to some, but I get asked if I am gay by women, what is going on ?



Dude I'd not worry, I used to be asked this by members of BOTH sexes until I was in my mid 30's more or less "married" and had two kids.  Most of the men that asked me were gay themselves and I assume I was being "hit-on".  I think the women asked because I refused to play their fucking mind games just to get laid, so more often than not I went with out.  Women of a certain age are not used to a guy like that, so they often assume gay. 



Heterosexually,
Some Knucklehead in NJ


_____________________________

"All life is pain highness, anyone that says different is just trying to sell something" The Man in Black (Dread Pirate Roberts)

(in reply to Aneirin)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Are you Gay ? - 8/28/2010 9:48:36 PM   
sexyred1


Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

Do you have a lot of drama in your life?

Have you been single a long time?

Do you walk or talk with flair?

Do you have a deep seated interest in hair products, clothes, cleaning, interior design?

I mean there are a ton of reasons a woman may ask that. I don't know you so it's kinda hard to say one way or the other without knowing more about you.




I don't see how any of the above makes someone gay.

Having drama in one's life-people do have problems sometimes.
Being single a long time? Maybe they are picky and have not met the right one
Walk or talk with flair? Seriously?
Deep seated interest in hair, clothes, cleaning or design? What a gross generalization. My ex husband is straight as an arrow and he cared very much about his looks, clothes, keeping our home clean and he loved architecture and design.

Another stereotype gone astray.

(in reply to littlewonder)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Are you Gay ? - 8/28/2010 10:03:52 PM   
LanceHughes


Posts: 4737
Joined: 2/12/2004
Status: offline 		The Ann Landers answer is "Why do you ask?"

Well, actually, her solution was "Why do you want to know?"

Either of those might work for you.

As usual in such a forum question, it's hard to generalize "Why do women ______ ?" or "Why do men ______ ?"

My personal gaydar goes off when I see a man looking at men.  When a man is cruising women, he's straight.  When he's cruising men, he's gay.  So, my anwer boils down to: Whom are you watching?

ETA: What makes a person gay?  Probably a gene which might be close to more genes all linked to those sterotypical behaviors.  As we advance, there is more and more gene-based behavorial evidence.

< Message edited by LanceHughes -- 8/28/2010 10:06:28 PM >

_____________________________

"Train 'em the right way - my way." Lance Hughes
"Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer, but wish we didn't." Erica Jong

10 fluffy points
50 nz points

Member: VAA's posse

(in reply to sexyred1)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Are you Gay ? - 8/28/2010 10:11:02 PM   
WinsomeDefiance


Posts: 6719
Joined: 8/7/2007
Status: offline 		They probably flirt with you, and get no measurable response. Maybe you are naively or blindly missing their sexual advances, and so they are assuming the only reason you aren't jumping all over the opportunity is you are gay?

My son asks me if I'm gay, because he says men hit on me all the time and I never pay them any attention. I'm honestly completely oblivious to the attentions of any strangers aside from assuming they are just being nice or friendly.




< Message edited by WinsomeDefiance -- 8/28/2010 10:12:18 PM >

(in reply to sexyred1)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Are you Gay ? - 8/28/2010 11:27:42 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1


quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

Do you have a lot of drama in your life?

Have you been single a long time?

Do you walk or talk with flair?

Do you have a deep seated interest in hair products, clothes, cleaning, interior design?

I mean there are a ton of reasons a woman may ask that. I don't know you so it's kinda hard to say one way or the other without knowing more about you.




I don't see how any of the above makes someone gay.

Having drama in one's life-people do have problems sometimes.
Being single a long time? Maybe they are picky and have not met the right one
Walk or talk with flair? Seriously?
Deep seated interest in hair, clothes, cleaning or design? What a gross generalization. My ex husband is straight as an arrow and he cared very much about his looks, clothes, keeping our home clean and he loved architecture and design.

Another stereotype gone astray.


It doesn't make them gay but depending on where you live, in much of America, especially in conservative areas where I am from, many women consider men with such things in their lives to be gay.

Go to any red neck small town in America and guarantee that you'll hear men of such to be gay even if they are straight.

(in reply to sexyred1)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Are you Gay ? - 8/28/2010 11:44:53 PM   
Twoshoes


Posts: 1218
Joined: 7/27/2010
Status: offline 		I've been accused of "thinking like a girl" before, but I haven't been called gay.

So it's all good.

(in reply to littlewonder)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Are you Gay ? - 8/29/2010 4:52:43 AM   
Aneirin


Posts: 6121
Joined: 3/18/2006
From: Tamaris
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: WinsomeDefiance

They probably flirt with you, and get no measurable response. Maybe you are naively or blindly missing their sexual advances, and so they are assuming the only reason you aren't jumping all over the opportunity is you are gay?

My son asks me if I'm gay, because he says men hit on me all the time and I never pay them any attention. I'm honestly completely oblivious to the attentions of any strangers aside from assuming they are just being nice or friendly.





The morning after the night before, and with a clearer view, yes, you are I think correct, I always did miss the nuances of unsaid communication, to which I assign the Asperger syndrome in me an annoying inability. But then, I dress differently, all black and leather last night and I have long hair, oh and for some drunken reason I remember I was belly dancing to the live band in the pub playing a cover of the Queen song Crazy little thing called love. The nut comes out when the beer is in.

_____________________________

Everything we are is the result of what we have thought, the mind is everything, what we think, we become - Guatama Buddha

Conservatism is distrust of people tempered by fear - William Gladstone

(in reply to WinsomeDefiance)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Are you Gay ? - 8/29/2010 5:43:55 AM   
SubPet715


Posts: 337
Joined: 8/24/2010
From: Brooklyn, NY
Status: offline 		I know I get asked the question when I am open with sex life and what it is I do. The crowds I am around are half suburbanite williamsburg hippie types who live and let live and take my word at face value that no I am not gay. The other half is somewhat ghetto youth who after me being honest about letting a woman use a vibrator on my ass marked me as gay, so you need to examine your actions and who you're addressing when you are asked that question. Dancing to queen wearing all leather and just plain loving every minute of it sounds like a fun time to me, to others they just label you as gay, those tactless people who ask questions when it isn't any business of theirs.

_____________________________

Passion isn't really happiness.

(in reply to Aneirin)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Are you Gay ? - 8/29/2010 7:45:28 AM   
LanceHughes


Posts: 4737
Joined: 2/12/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: WinsomeDefiance
They probably flirt with you, and get no measurable response. Maybe you are naively or blindly missing their sexual advances, and so they are assuming the only reason you aren't jumping all over the opportunity is you are gay?

^ ^ ^ Quoted for TRUTH! ^ ^ ^

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aneirin
The morning after the night before, and with a clearer view, yes, you [WinsomeDefiance] are I think correct, I always did miss the nuances of unsaid communication, to which I assign the Asperger syndrome in me an annoying inability.

... I dress differently, all black and leather last night and ...  was ... dancing to ... a Queen song ...

::: SIGH ::: Oh, for the good old days when "gay" wasn't so mainstreamed!!! LOL! If you were gay, you went to the gay bars.  If you were straight, you went to the straight bars.  Even finer selection.... in-the-day, Denver had (by exact count!) 20 gay bars catering to various sorts: Male Leather, Cowboy, Cowgirl, Youth, Male Hustler, Drag Queens, Drag Kings<!>, etc.  So, go into any one, pick up the "bar rag" - free newpaper with ALL types advertised, visit what appeals, and then you have your "home bar." ::: SIGH ::: Oh, for the good old days.......

Of course, in the OP's case, then his behavior and "the Asperger syndrome in [him]" would be more able to be recognized as leading to the ladies' inquiries.

So, inquiring minds want to know..... any men hit on you? LOL!  LOL = Lascivious Ogling by Lance.

< Message edited by LanceHughes -- 8/29/2010 7:48:04 AM >

_____________________________

"Train 'em the right way - my way." Lance Hughes
"Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer, but wish we didn't." Erica Jong

10 fluffy points
50 nz points

Member: VAA's posse

(in reply to Aneirin)
Profile   Post #: 20
Page:   [1] 2   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Off the Grid >> Are you Gay ? Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.109