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RE: submissive male - 8/29/2010 11:52:36 AM   
SylvereApLeanan


Posts: 8275
Joined: 11/1/2007
From: Hell
Status: offline 		*sigh*

I strongly advise you to discuss your kink with your wife. Pick up a copy of the book When Someone You Love Is Kinky and read it together. Very few of the people in the local groups will look kindly on a man who is cheating on his wife. I would be happy to talk to your wife over coffee if she has any questions about how to satisfy your kinks in a way that is comfortable for her and fulfilling to you. However, I will not help you cheat on her.

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Sylverë
Dark Muse
30 Fluffy Points
Grumpy Cat is my spirit animal.
Shadow Governess & Mean Girl
"There's something that doesn't make sense. Let's go and poke it with a stick."— The Doctor

(in reply to ScaryJello)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: submissive male - 8/29/2010 12:04:13 PM   
janieMO


Posts: 7
Joined: 8/29/2010
From: kansas city
Status: offline 		i serve her as best i can, for instance, i just mopped the kitchen floor, but she has no interest in sex at all, and is not dominant. i think its kinder to her, to find my interests without upsetting her, or leaving her after many years of marriage. its not completely honest, but i have her feeling to consider, and the only other choice is for me to abandon my feeling and desires.

(in reply to ScaryJello)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: submissive male - 8/29/2010 12:10:53 PM   
SylvereApLeanan


Posts: 8275
Joined: 11/1/2007
From: Hell
Status: offline 		Sir, that is the oldest cop out in the book. If you genuinely think cheating on your wife is kinder to her than leaving her, assuming you can't manage to reach an accord, then please, for the love of all things holy, leave her. I promise that will be the greatest kindness you can do her.

_____________________________

Sylverë
Dark Muse
30 Fluffy Points
Grumpy Cat is my spirit animal.
Shadow Governess & Mean Girl
"There's something that doesn't make sense. Let's go and poke it with a stick."— The Doctor

(in reply to janieMO)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: submissive male - 8/29/2010 12:11:13 PM   
OttersSwim


Posts: 2860
Joined: 9/1/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: janieMO

i serve her as best i can, for instance, i just mopped the kitchen floor, but she has no interest in sex at all, and is not dominant. i think its kinder to her, to find my interests without upsetting her, or leaving her after many years of marriage. its not completely honest, but i have her feeling to consider, and the only other choice is for me to abandon my feeling and desires.


How do you think betrayal feels?

If you are caught in a marriage without sexual interaction, then there is more wrong there than just you feeling kinky.  Your post is a complete pack of BS justification and rationalization for acts against another person that you know to be wrong. 

...good luck with that. 


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I am on a journey of authenticity and self.

(in reply to janieMO)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: submissive male - 8/29/2010 12:15:24 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		Yes, I'm sure her feelings are spared that you are sending a hundred dollars a month on a pay site.  It couldn't possibly be in her best interest to have a husband that is honest with her and wanted the kind of life that she seems to think that she has.  I don't see that as saving her.  You are saving yourself in not being man enough to either fulfill the promise that you made to her or allowing both of you to pursue the life that each of you wants. 

Submission is not based on selfishness.  Dominance isn't either, for that matter. 

Instead of pissing away that hundred bucks a month, why not try investing it in rekindling the romance in your marriage?  Buy the book that was suggested to you and see if it can be incorporated between your wife and yourself.  If not, start saving the money to file the divorce papers so that the two of you can separately pursue what you want in life and have the kind of partner that each of you deserve.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to janieMO)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: submissive male - 8/29/2010 12:22:03 PM   
janieMO


Posts: 7
Joined: 8/29/2010
From: kansas city
Status: offline 		thank you very much for advice.

(in reply to janieMO)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: submissive male - 8/29/2010 2:10:01 PM   
tiggerspoohbear


Posts: 19141
Joined: 6/27/2010
Status: offline 		Not that any of it has penetrated your brain right? Or that you'll take the excellent advice that was given to you about trust and honesty? You may think your wife has no idea, but you might be surprised at how much she knows and just isn't saying a thing. It happens all too often, I can say this having been on both sides of the cheating thing. Never did turn out pretty, for obvious reasons. Now, no more lying or cheating or being dishonest, I've learned some lessons the very hard way. Won't put myself through it anymore, or my Dom.

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"RABBIT IS GOOD, RABBIT IS WISE".

"I'm a baaa-aaad pussycat".


(in reply to janieMO)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: submissive male - 8/30/2010 7:17:49 AM   
OohAahMrs


Posts: 7723
Joined: 7/14/2010
Status: offline

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You may choc the choc.........Oh forget it......

(in reply to janieMO)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: submissive male - 8/30/2010 7:28:05 AM   
dammykester


Posts: 2
Joined: 4/8/2010
Status: offline

(in reply to OohAahMrs)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: submissive male - 8/30/2010 9:26:51 PM   
thornhappy


Posts: 8596
Joined: 12/16/2006
Status: offline 		It would be nice if the owners of that site could spell, or else they would know that they are missing the final s on "specie".

Scholarships available?  Do ya supposed they are an accredited institution?  (Can you imagine the accreditation committee? )


< Message edited by thornhappy -- 8/30/2010 9:29:38 PM >

(in reply to dammykester)
Profile   Post #: 30
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