JstAnotherSub
Posts: 6174
Status: offline
|
I get what you are saying DMF. Looking back, she has always been this way. Promise to come to family reunions and never show up, be late to everything, and I do mean everything, since she has been old enough to go places alone, she would do selfish things such as bring all her dogs over, knowing they hate any other dogs, and them tell me to keep my dog away from them. All in all, little things, but since she left, I have spent a lot of time thinking back and the list is long. As I have gotten older, I think I have gotten a little bit hard on the inside. It takes a lot for me to completely write someone off and out of my life, but in the past 10 years, I have done it to 3 people (including her), 2 of which are family members. I have no regrets about the other 2, and so far none about letting her go. It may be a defense mechanism, it may be selfishness on my part. I just know that I am finished having people in my life that are toxic and do nothing but bring me down. Thus far, it has made me feel good, yet scared about who I have become. It scares me how, once I make a decision like this, I don't look back with regret and wonder if I did the right thing. I didn't get that ability to harden my heart until my ex left, and I am afraid I am becoming a little too comfortable with doing it. Ain't life grand? lolol
_____________________________
yep
|