Having the right vs being in the right (Rant) (Full Version)

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MastrVran -> Having the right vs being in the right (Rant) (9/9/2010 8:36:58 AM)

First off let me say this, I would hope, no Moderator should feel the need to come in and say according to CM policy anyone, everyone and their mother can make any post anywhere anytime. Thats a given. People have the right to post as they please so long as it is within the allowed way.

With that said, I am noticing a trend where someone says I want a specific perspective from just one type of personality. A Master, a slave, a Mistress or whatever followed by a slew of people, who are not the type requested, who just HAVE to post their own answer. You know what? They have the right.

Having the right though does not mean you are "In the right". What ever happened to people who respected someones wishes? Oh that doesnt matter, "I HAVE THE RIGHT!!!" What is that? some battle cry of the Poor Oppressed? In some way asking to just get a particular opinion viewpoint makes your life less by asking not to see your opinion?

In the past people had the right to tell others...go to the back of the bus, don't drink from that water fountain, yours is around back, no you cannot eat here. They had the right. The law supported them. Is this the same as that? Of course not, other than it is the same answer people give when they want to do something which is supported by some law or rule but which is really not the "Right" answer. Oh I know most of those whose opinions just have to be included will not admit to this as being correct because by Golly they have "THE RIGHT". Yes they do. No one argues that you do not have the right. You have the right to be rude. To ignore peoples requests. To step on peoples feelings. To force yourself on others in an online forum even if asked not to. Collar me gave you that Right with its rules.

Now as said, we can always do what is allowed even if it is not the polite thing to do. People seem to feel being polite is no longer worth while. Or maybe just they really do not give a crap because they have to show through their posts just how their opinion could not have been lived without. I do not know. Perhaps I just miss the times when people were not just impressed with having the right, but also wanted to be "in the right".

Perhaps thats just me? And yes this is just my opinion. It is not a fact or written in stone lol. Just something I decided to comment on. Oh and everyone is asked to reply. Please feel free.

MV



stef -> RE: Having the right vs being in the right (Rant) (9/9/2010 8:39:30 AM)

My cat's breath smells like cat food.

~stef



Jeffff -> RE: Having the right vs being in the right (Rant) (9/9/2010 8:42:16 AM)

The "right" to post wherever you want goes hand in hand with the right to post as pompously as you want.

What is your point here?




DarkSteven -> RE: Having the right vs being in the right (Rant) (9/9/2010 9:12:06 AM)

I post where I like, if I feel that I have something to say.

If someone else feels that my viewpoint isn't valid and I do, I post. I'll be darned if I'll sub to a thread.



sexyred1 -> RE: Having the right vs being in the right (Rant) (9/9/2010 9:15:05 AM)

OP, I hope you feel better after your rant.

And I do hope you know that this is not your website, therefore, everyone will continue to disrespect your wishes and post wherever and and whenever they wish to.




IronBear -> RE: Having the right vs being in the right (Rant) (9/9/2010 9:26:50 AM)

Whilst in many areas I agree with the OP especially from a correct protocol view. I can understand why some folks post requesting that only certain members (i.e.) Masters or Mistresses reply with the understanding that others may well feel compelled to respond too. Having said this there are two options for the OP.

Firstly The OP can of course, completely ignore all replies from those outside his or her parameters.

Secondly (and I believe the wiser one) is to just accept all replies with the understanding that whilst a slave (for example) may respond to such a post, they oft have valid and informative information often gleaned from experience and certainly from their side of the kneel perspective. All grist to the mill and adds up to a more balanced pool of information more useful to other readers too.

From a personal view point I would perhaps ask for replies from a specific group and add that I will welcome replies from pothers if they decide to respond. My view would be to request as many of the target group to respond along with as many others who feel so inclined.

But hey I'm protocol oriented and some things for me are just not done and are just not cricket. Others see things differently which id fine too..



angelikaJ -> RE: Having the right vs being in the right (Rant) (9/9/2010 9:28:06 AM)

You had the right to post this where ever you wanted to... but that does not mean you were right in choosing to post it in this section. [;)]

edit: grammar



MastrVran -> RE: Having the right vs being in the right (Rant) (9/9/2010 9:28:48 AM)

Lol so far everyone has supported my points perfectly. Thanks people.

The real point here is not and was not stated as your right to post. It has to do with something most of you were never taught or seem to have forgotten. The idea that respecting someones wishes means something or should mean something. Obviously everyone other than maybe the first poster who posted nothing but said it anyway, feels that politeness in regards to someone making a request is no longer important.

You have once more made my heart swell with realization that things that once meant something have been discareded like trash. Thank you for proving this yet again. lol

MV



MastrVran -> RE: Having the right vs being in the right (Rant) (9/9/2010 9:29:49 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: IronBear

Whilst in many areas I agree with the OP especially from a correct protocol view. I can understand why some folks post requesting that only certain members (i.e.) Masters or Mistresses reply with the understanding that others may well feel compelled to respond too. Having said this there are two options for the OP.

Firstly The OP can of course, completely ignore all replies from those outside his or her parameters.

Secondly (and I believe the wiser one) is to just accept all replies with the understanding that whilst a slave (for example) may respond to such a post, they oft have valid and informative information often gleaned from experience and certainly from their side of the kneel perspective. All grist to the mill and adds up to a more balanced pool of information more useful to other readers too.

From a personal view point I would perhaps ask for replies from a specific group and add that I will welcome replies from pothers if they decide to respond. My view would be to request as many of the target group to respond along with as many others who feel so inclined.

But hey I'm protocol oriented and some things for me are just not done and are just not cricket. Others see things differently which id fine too..


Sorry Bear my post was made pre seeing yours.

I personally accept all replies and do not bother saying only some type need reply. But when someone else requests it, I being old fashioned perhaps would respect the wishes of the requester. I see this as not neccessarily an improvement in how we as a society acts.

MV

Edited to add a bit.



antinomy -> RE: Having the right vs being in the right (Rant) (9/9/2010 9:29:51 AM)

Just because someone started a thread and only wants responses from a certain population it does not mean other people are in the wrong to answer.  The OP is not the only person reading the thread.  While he/she might have been the one that asked for perspective, other people are there reading too, and if someone has something of value to add, I believe they should.  Invited or not, these are public forums, and the OP always has the option of ignoring the posts from people whose opinion they did not request. 

I happen to be a very polite person.  However, again, the original poster is not the owner of a thread.  They can ASK for something, but they don't set the guidelines for the boards.  I think that most posters here recognize this fact, and should be thick skinned enough to handle that, if not- I'm thinking they likely need to find another venue to post in.  Perhaps a blog, where they are the owner, and can set the parameters that they desire.



MastrVran -> RE: Having the right vs being in the right (Rant) (9/9/2010 9:32:46 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: antinomy

Just because someone started a thread and only wants responses from a certain population it does not mean other people are in the wrong to answer.  The OP is not the only person reading the thread.  While he/she might have been the one that asked for perspective, other people are there reading too, and if someone has something of value to add, I believe they should.  Invited or not, these are public forums, and the OP always has the option of ignoring the posts from people whose opinion they did not request.  


Thanks, and I do not doubt you are right, Everyone can have valid points some of which are even very good ones.

I am looking at something different though. When did we lose the ability to respect someone elses requests? When did politeness become passe'?

MV



antinomy -> RE: Having the right vs being in the right (Rant) (9/9/2010 9:34:26 AM)

quote:

I happen to be a very polite person. However, again, the original poster is not the owner of a thread. They can ASK for something, but they don't set the guidelines for the boards. I think that most posters here recognize this fact, and should be thick skinned enough to handle that, if not- I'm thinking they likely need to find another venue to post in. Perhaps a blog, where they are the owner, and can set the parameters that they desire.


I edited my post too late, but it basically answered what you asked:

"I happen to be a very polite person.  However, again, the original poster is not the owner of a thread.  They can ASK for something, but they don't set the guidelines for the boards.  I think that most posters here recognize this fact, and should be thick skinned enough to handle that, if not- I'm thinking they likely need to find another venue to post in.  Perhaps a blog, where they are the owner, and can set the parameters that they desire."



stef -> RE: Having the right vs being in the right (Rant) (9/9/2010 9:36:18 AM)

It's a sad day on Urth when a man of Gor is butt-hurt.

~stef



igor2003 -> RE: Having the right vs being in the right (Rant) (9/9/2010 9:43:36 AM)

I really find it qute amusing...A VERY high percentage of the people that use the forums agree that to practice their particular kink in public is wrong since it forces the public to be unwilling participants.  But it's amazing how many of them don't have any problem what-so-ever with injecting their unsolicited opinion into a thread that specifically requests only the opinion of a certain group. 



sexyred1 -> RE: Having the right vs being in the right (Rant) (9/9/2010 9:45:36 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MastrVran

Lol so far everyone has supported my points perfectly. Thanks people.

The real point here is not and was not stated as your right to post. It has to do with something most of you were never taught or seem to have forgotten. The idea that respecting someones wishes means something or should mean something. Obviously everyone other than maybe the first poster who posted nothing but said it anyway, feels that politeness in regards to someone making a request is no longer important.

You have once more made my heart swell with realization that things that once meant something have been discareded like trash. Thank you for proving this yet again. lol

MV


Sorry but your point has nothing to do with reality. Obviously, it is good manners to respect someone's wishes in certain social situations.

However, this is an online message board. There are no social niceties other than being civil, polite and obeying the site's TOS inherent in posting and replying to written words here.

If you had a blog, you could dictate who and what you want replied to; but even then you cannot stop people online from responding to what is written online.

You are living in a dream world of fantasy when you think you can dictate people's behavior on the internet.

I also think it is fascinating that you chose to post this in Ask a Master. So it seems that you are upset that so many dominant men reply to posts in Ask a Submissive as well.




MastrVran -> RE: Having the right vs being in the right (Rant) (9/9/2010 9:45:40 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: antinomy

quote:

I happen to be a very polite person. However, again, the original poster is not the owner of a thread. They can ASK for something, but they don't set the guidelines for the boards. I think that most posters here recognize this fact, and should be thick skinned enough to handle that, if not- I'm thinking they likely need to find another venue to post in. Perhaps a blog, where they are the owner, and can set the parameters that they desire.


I edited my post too late, but it basically answered what you asked:

"I happen to be a very polite person.  However, again, the original poster is not the owner of a thread.  They can ASK for something, but they don't set the guidelines for the boards.  I think that most posters here recognize this fact, and should be thick skinned enough to handle that, if not- I'm thinking they likely need to find another venue to post in.  Perhaps a blog, where they are the owner, and can set the parameters that they desire."



Smiles

Thanks, and I understand that veiwpoint. Once though, most would not make a reply when asked not to. Sort of like sitting in Church and the Preacher during a sermon makes a point. Most would not stand up and start saying how God does not really exist so why are we listening to that crap. Is this like Church? Of course not. But as we stop caring about others opinion, requests or beliefs, maybe one day the world we become like this. Maybe it already is.

Just some things to think about. No need to focus on if you can post. We know you can. That was the first thing stated. This is more a morality question dealing with "should you post". What is it that makes your reply so important that is more important than the person who asked the question and their request? Or maybe thats just how I seem to see it from an old fashioned veiwpoint. I respect peoples requests. Perhaps I am alone in this? Maybe just thinking about this might cause someone to wonder why we seem to have lost this concept? Obviously for some this is not even a valid question lol. I guess that in and of itself is a form of answer.

MV



leadership527 -> RE: Having the right vs being in the right (Rant) (9/9/2010 9:48:17 AM)

I guess I don't interpret it the same way Vran. In fact, I just posted a dom's perspective on experience on a thread asking for sub's perspectives. I didn't feel like I was being rude though. I felt like I was expanding on the question and answer set. I myself generally find multiple viewpoints to things I post terribly interesting and I assume there's at least a chance other people will also. In addition, it is trivial to scan the threads and filter out just the responses you want.

I try not to derail threads... any threads... but I don't personally interpret posting an alternate viewpoint from the sample requested as being rude or disruptive.



sexyred1 -> RE: Having the right vs being in the right (Rant) (9/9/2010 9:51:30 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: igor2003

I really find it qute amusing...A VERY high percentage of the people that use the forums agree that to practice their particular kink in public is wrong since it forces the public to be unwilling participants.  But it's amazing how many of them don't have any problem what-so-ever with injecting their unsolicited opinion into a thread that specifically requests only the opinion of a certain group. 


I really find it quite amusing that a VERY high percentage of the people that use the forums seem to think that imposing their moral standards on the participants is ok. You and the OP are confusing morality with the reality of where your words are being posted. Again, this is not your site or the OP's.

I also think that when someone comes in and specifically requests the opinion of a certain group, they automatically will get replies from everyone just to annoy them. Again, another facet of the unique nature of a public message board.



MastrVran -> RE: Having the right vs being in the right (Rant) (9/9/2010 9:55:29 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1


quote:

ORIGINAL: MastrVran

Lol so far everyone has supported my points perfectly. Thanks people.

The real point here is not and was not stated as your right to post. It has to do with something most of you were never taught or seem to have forgotten. The idea that respecting someones wishes means something or should mean something. Obviously everyone other than maybe the first poster who posted nothing but said it anyway, feels that politeness in regards to someone making a request is no longer important.

You have once more made my heart swell with realization that things that once meant something have been discareded like trash. Thank you for proving this yet again. lol

MV


Sorry but your point has nothing to do with reality. Obviously, it is good manners to respect someone's wishes in certain social situations.

However, this is an online message board. There are no social niceties inherent in posting and replying to written words here.

If you had a blog, you could dictate who and what you want replied to; but even then you cannot stop people online from responding to what is written online.

You are living in a dream world of fantasy when you think you can dictate people's behavior on the internet.

I also think it is fascinating that you chose to post this in Ask a Master. So it seems that you are upset that so many dominant men reply to posts in Ask a Submissive as well.




So being polite only applies face to face.

Thank you

lol. I just asked a question to illustrate a point. You keep making my point obvious. Thank you again.

As for where I posted it? It happens to be the Forum I read. One of them anyway. So naturally seeing this occuring here, and this being one I read, I posted here. I also lol, did not limit the responses to my own post because I could not care less who replies. But for whatever reason, some do care. I see nothing wrong with respecting their request.

Now I am not saying anyone should Police the net and enforce Politeness. See this is what is known as a moral question. As such it is you, who decides if you wish to be Polite or like so many others decide that on here, you do not have any need to be polite. For me, Politeness is right no matter what format we are using to discuss something. For others, such as yourself, you state there is no need since others do not do so? I do not live my life based on others. If it is not polite, no matter where it occurs it will not be polite. And because it is not polite, I would not do it. Personal choice. You can decide to be polite or not. You have decided or so it seems.

MV



igor2003 -> RE: Having the right vs being in the right (Rant) (9/9/2010 9:56:43 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1


quote:

ORIGINAL: igor2003

I really find it qute amusing...A VERY high percentage of the people that use the forums agree that to practice their particular kink in public is wrong since it forces the public to be unwilling participants.  But it's amazing how many of them don't have any problem what-so-ever with injecting their unsolicited opinion into a thread that specifically requests only the opinion of a certain group. 


I really find it quite amusing that a VERY high percentage of the people that use the forums seem to think that imposing their moral standards on the participants is ok. You and the OP are confusing morality with the reality of where your words are being posted. Again, this is not your site or the OP's.

I also think that when someone comes in and specifically requests the opinion of a certain group, they automatically will get replies from everyone just to annoy them. Again, another facet of the unique nature of a public message board.


I'm not confusing anything...I simply made an observation that you want to argue with.  Can you deny that anything I said is true?  And what you say about people doing things just to annoy them is very true...which is part of what the OP mentioned about people being rude.  Damn...you fit he bill well.



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