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Smoking Sub? What can be done? - 4/22/2006 9:49:50 PM

MistyMenthal

Posts: 413
Joined: 3/28/2006
Status: offline

I am a smoking Sub, {Slave to the right One.}

I Love to Smoke long Menthal Cigarettes.

It's a fetish, we all have them..

Finding a Dom who will let me continue doing so
has been hard.

Must I quit to find someone?

KISS ME, Misty

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RE: Smoking Sub? What can be done? - 4/22/2006 9:58:21 PM

kajira4aMaster

Posts: 49
Joined: 12/26/2005
Status: offline

no you don't have to quit.. your 'one' will be ok with it
just be patient...

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RE: Smoking Sub? What can be done? - 4/22/2006 10:13:20 PM

juliaoceania

Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline

Hi Misty,

I quit smoking a little over a year ago.. You see I was taking care of my stepfather who had COPD and emphysema. This caused him to have a stroke that left him very brain damaged and blind. He struggled for 3 ore years gasping for breath like he was drowning, he died April 10th. My mom quit smoking too, and she had smoked for over 50 years... To see someone so ill from smoking changed my mind about continuing with it.... and I felt for a long time as you do now. I also lost two friends after I quit to liver cancer (he was 43) and another to lung cancer after I quit.

No one wants to love someone and watch them go through what I described above...Especially someone who has taken responsibility for your well being. I can't help myself from posting this, not because I like to preach about smoking, I know this will probably be seen as nonsense, it is just so fresh in my mind to think about the loss of this man because I took care of him and at the end he died because he couldnt exhale his air.. he fought SOOOOOO hard to keep going.

(in reply to MistyMenthal)

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RE: Smoking Sub? What can be done? - 4/22/2006 10:13:56 PM

MistWalker

Posts: 90
Joined: 4/20/2006
From: Memphis
Status: offline

it may be the case as kajira said.. and you will find the right one that wont ask you to give it up... some i know definetly would wish you to quit smokeing.. and it would be for your own good, most do not do things without them being for the greater good. and ill cavet t his by saying i am in fact a smoker. though the Mistresses i have had have been also so tolerated it. save when i was useing it to try and keep from eating/supressing my apitite.. in that case i was restricted from haveing more then a certian number.. but look enough you will find the One that will tolerate the desire, if not encouragre it..

(in reply to kajira4aMaster)

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RE: Smoking Sub? What can be done? - 4/22/2006 10:21:40 PM

Maam4slavegirl

Posts: 40
Joined: 3/16/2006
From: Iowa
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

Hi Misty,

I quit smoking a little over a year ago.. You see I was taking care of my stepfather who had COPD and emphysema. This caused him to have a stroke that left him very brain damaged and blind. He struggled for 3 ore years gasping for breath like he was drowning, he died April 10th. My mom quit smoking too, and she had smoked for over 50 years... To see someone so ill from smoking changed my mind about continuing with it.... and I felt for a long time as you do now. I also lost two friends after I quit to liver cancer (he was 43) and another to lung cancer after I quit.

No one wants to love someone and watch them go through what I described above...Especially someone who has taken responsibility for your well being. I can't help myself from posting this, not because I like to preach about smoking, I know this will probably be seen as nonsense, it is just so fresh in my mind to think about the loss of this man because I took care of him and at the end he died because he couldnt exhale his air.. he fought SOOOOOO hard to keep going.

Everyone has their own opinion on smoking. Mine is if you do it that is fine. Hell, you could quit tomorrow and walk outside only to be hit by a truck. Yes, it is not good for you, but it is your choice. I am a smoker and a recovering alcoholic (been sober 15 years now)...I gave up the booze...the cigarettes will be staying. Telling all of the above is like a recovering alcoholic preaching to the drunks in the bar...it's not up to you to shove what you believe into someone else's head. If it is meant for her to find her one and keep smoking then it will happen. Sorry, first time I ever ranted on here...done now...hopefully it won't happen again

_____________________________

You must be true to yourself before you can be true to anyone else. If you play games do not play them with other people's time. It is not fair to those truly seeking.

Mz Patti or Patti...depends on who's asking...

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RE: Smoking Sub? What can be done? - 4/22/2006 10:38:00 PM

ScooterTrash

Posts: 1407
Joined: 1/24/2005
From: Indiana
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MistyMenthal

I am a smoking Sub, {Slave to the right One.}

I Love to Smoke long Menthal Cigarettes.

It's a fetish, we all have them..

Finding a Dom who will let me continue doing so
has been hard.

Must I quit to find someone?

KISS ME, Misty

I don't know that I would agree it's a fetish, it's just something you do, it is part of you. That, along with any other idiosyncrasies are just part of your being. I wouldn't be too concerned if that makes you compatible or not..if it comes down to just that, then perhaps the rest was not right either. We smoke and we are open about telling potential sub/slaves that so they can make their own decision if it's something they can deal with. If that's a deal breaker than so be it.

_____________________________

Formal symbolic representation of qualitative entities is doomed to its rightful place of minor significance in a world where flowers and beautiful women abound.
-Albert Einstein

(in reply to MistyMenthal)

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RE: Smoking Sub? What can be done? - 4/22/2006 10:38:30 PM

MistyMenthal

Posts: 413
Joined: 3/28/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

quote:

Hi Misty,

I quit smoking a little over a year ago.. You see I was taking care of my stepfather who had COPD and emphysema. This caused him to have a stroke that left him very brain damaged and blind. He struggled for 3 ore years gasping for breath like he was drowning, he died April 10th. My mom quit smoking too, and she had smoked for over 50 years... To see someone so ill from smoking changed my mind about continuing with it.... and I felt for a long time as you do now. I also lost two friends after I quit to liver cancer (he was 43) and another to lung cancer after I quit.

No one wants to love someone and watch them go through what I described above...Especially someone who has taken responsibility for your well being. I can't help myself from posting this, not because I like to preach about smoking, I know this will probably be seen as nonsense, it is just so fresh in my mind to think about the loss of this man because I took care of him and at the end he died because he couldnt exhale his air.. he fought SOOOOOO hard to keep going.

Everyone has their own opinion on smoking. Mine is if you do it that is fine. Hell, you could quit tomorrow and walk outside only to be hit by a truck. Yes, it is not good for you, but it is your choice. I am a smoker and a recovering alcoholic (been sober 15 years now)...I gave up the booze...the cigarettes will be staying. Telling all of the above is like a recovering alcoholic preaching to the drunks in the bar...it's not up to you to shove what you believe into someone else's head. If it is meant for her to find her one and keep smoking then it will happen. Sorry, first time I ever ranted on here...done now...hopefully it won't happen again

I know that Juliaoceania Is trying
to be helpful, letting me know the complications from Smoking.
I appreciate that!

Maam4slavegirl.
Maybe you want a Slave who will in 15 or so years feed You oxygen
24/7. I know what kills me, might
not kill You. But She was just stating
how She felt about smoking.
Not asking Your Opinon.
But you gave your 1 cent so ok.

I'll have to seriously think about it!

KISS ME, Misty

(in reply to Maam4slavegirl)

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RE: Smoking Sub? What can be done? - 4/22/2006 11:06:18 PM

juliaoceania

Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline

thanks for not thinking i was preaching at you, I wasnt...really

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RE: Smoking Sub? What can be done? - 4/23/2006 12:07:59 AM

TemptingNviceSub

Posts: 3054
Joined: 10/1/2005
Status: offline

One of the few things I let any one I am in contact with know is that I smoke.For the most part it hasnt seem much of a deterrant..however..I am uncertain I would be able to quit, if asked....and I truly do not wish to become a meance to society if I should happen to try...be well..Tempting

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RE: Smoking Sub? What can be done? - 4/23/2006 6:54:10 AM

ShiftedJewel

Posts: 2492
Joined: 12/2/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MistyMenthal

I am a smoking Sub, {Slave to the right One.}

I Love to Smoke long Menthal Cigarettes.

It's a fetish, we all have them..

Finding a Dom who will let me continue doing so
has been hard.

Must I quit to find someone?

KISS ME, Misty

I can say we've had the same thing happen... all of us are smokers and there are a lot of subs/slaves out there that are terribly opposed to serving smokers... so like everyone else, I say the right one will come along sooner or later.

quote:

Everyone has their own opinion on smoking. Mine is if you do it that is fine. Hell, you could quit tomorrow and walk outside only to be hit by a truck. Yes, it is not good for you, but it is your choice. I am a smoker and a recovering alcoholic (been sober 15 years now)...I gave up the booze...the cigarettes will be staying. Telling all of the above is like a recovering alcoholic preaching to the drunks in the bar...it's not up to you to shove what you believe into someone else's head. If it is meant for her to find her one and keep smoking then it will happen. Sorry, first time I ever ranted on here...done now...hopefully it won't happen again

Like you, I gave up the other vices, this one stays.. I've tried to quit quite a few times before and decided it wasn't worth going to prison for. I enjoy it and I have no desire to quit. (which is probably why I've failed in every attempt to do so... cuz my heart just isn't in it.)

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Don't ask, trust me, you won't like the answer... no one ever does.

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RE: Smoking Sub? What can be done? - 4/23/2006 7:14:04 AM

PhoenixLM

Posts: 79
Joined: 5/12/2005
From: Fort Wayne, Indiana
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ScooterTrash

I don't know that I would agree it's a fetish, it's just something you do, it is part of you. That, along with any other idiosyncrasies are just part of your being. I wouldn't be too concerned if that makes you compatible or not..if it comes down to just that, then perhaps the rest was not right either. We smoke and we are open about telling potential sub/slaves that so they can make their own decision if it's something they can deal with. If that's a deal breaker than so be it.

Sir ScooterTrash, In my Mistress' house it is a deal breaker for a very simple reason, I have COPD, severe Asthma, as well as allergies to cigerette tobaco. Maam will not allow new people in her house that smoke, due to this.

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Phoenix
House Ds Haven
http://dshaven.com

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RE: Smoking Sub? What can be done? - 4/23/2006 7:20:12 AM

slavejali

Posts: 2918
Status: offline

Someone here wrote a story about how her Master helped her quit smoking, i loved it. He sat a pack of cigarettes down and said, you can only have one Master "choose". I think when the right Master comes along, all our little habits may not seem so important. (Wish I could remember who told the story).

_____________________________

Freedom in Bondage

Different Strokes for Different Folks

"I'll always have a *soft spot* for Sadists"

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RE: Smoking Sub? What can be done? - 4/23/2006 7:45:06 AM

Mercnbeth

Posts: 11766
Status: offline

quote:

Must I quit to find someone?

Misty,
In a word - NO.

In my search, my preference was for a non-smoker. If it was a hard limit, I never would have found my slave beth or be with her today.

I've had to study human behavior and the psychology of addiction. Smoking addiction is more difficult to "cure" than any other, including addiction to heroin. When I met beth, she was "quiting". "Quiting is easy" she's did it at least 25 times since she started smoking at 15. she was doing it again when we met. At one point that weekend the only thing she was wearing was a nicotine patch, but somehow it managed to have slid from her shoulder to the top of her leg. But that's another story.

We talked about her smoking. It was an "issue" but not an exclusionary one. I told her I'd help her quit but it wasn't something I wanted her to do just to please me. I developed a "Stop Smoking Program" consisting of 20 steps. In reality 20 levels of increasing levels of punishment for the consequence of smoking. Without going into all the details, the 20th level was the shaving of her head. she knew me and knew that my pragmatic approach would not compromise. If she willingly agreed to the program she'd incur the consequences if she failed. The Program is still outstanding and ready to implement but after 3+ years beth is still smoking and the program still stands at the ready in the background.

I could give you many reasons why I permit the behavior. You may interpret them as personal rationalization but they are based upon facts. The most basic fact is when I met beth I didn't MAKE her a submissive I adapted her, already present, submissive personality to serve me; ultimately as my slave. All that she was came with that personality. All that she had experienced and all that she was as a person, and as a woman, was part of what attracted me to her. As much as I hated and still hate it, smoking was a deeply ingrained part of who beth was and is. I wanted to train beth, not change her. Making her stop smoking would have changed her. There are other things I've "made" or "make" her do but they are all within her "nature". Breaking the addiction to smoking will only come when she makes herself. When that comes, I'll be there to support and enforce that decision.

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RE: Smoking Sub? What can be done? - 4/23/2006 11:56:34 AM

SweetSarijane

Posts: 3788
Joined: 10/7/2005
From: KC area Missouri
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I'm also a smoker. When I'm ready I will quit. It's like drugs or alcohol, it has to be the person's choice to quit it or it's pretty well doomed to fail. Quitting isn't going to guarantee finding a Dom or Master anymore than continuing will. It's about finding who you fit with. In my opinion you have to quit for yourself, because it's what YOU want and believe is best.

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Sarah2
Deviant Mind
Wild Side Readers KCSass

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RE: Smoking Sub? What can be done? - 4/23/2006 2:31:13 PM

Bagelfather

Posts: 4
Joined: 4/2/2006
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You should only change yourself when you feel it is right for you. You shouldn't change yourself when it is right for someone else. The exception being when the path is self destructive. Smoking may be deemed by some as self destructive, so is drug use, alcohol abuse, etc. A similar argument could be made for larger men and women who feel they cannot meet a sub or dominant because of their size.

I think you can meet someone who wants you for who you are, it just might be slightly harder. You should settle for someone who makes you happy and completes you and makes a finished puzzle naturally rather than use an exacto blade and hammer to make the piece fit.

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RE: Smoking Sub? What can be done? - 4/23/2006 3:38:59 PM

kisshou

Posts: 2425
Joined: 2/11/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MistyMenthal
I am a smoking Sub, {Slave to the right One.}
I Love to Smoke long Menthal Cigarettes.
It's a fetish, we all have them..
Finding a Dom who will let me continue doing so
has been hard.
Must I quit to find someone?
KISS ME, Misty

Misty I dated a guy who had a fetish for having smoke from a cigarette blown in his face. It made him get hard as a rock. So yes a guy for you does exist , it just might take a while to find him.

< Message edited by kisshou -- 4/23/2006 3:40:13 PM >

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RE: Smoking Sub? What can be done? - 4/23/2006 5:29:42 PM

Littlepita

Posts: 1430
Joined: 10/6/2005
Status: offline

I met my One and I quit smoking after doing so for 23 years. It was hard of course, but I knew if I wanted to live in his house and share his life I had no choice. I'm very happy I choose my Sir over the smokes. You will make the right choice for yourself.

_____________________________

“I, with a deeper instinct, choose a man who compels my strength, who makes enormous demands on me, who does not doubt my courage or my toughness, who does not believe me naive or innocent, who has the courage to treat me like a woman.” – Anais Nin

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RE: Smoking Sub? What can be done? - 4/23/2006 8:42:54 PM

babysburnin

Posts: 421
Joined: 2/16/2006
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i smoke. i hate it. i'm addicted to nicotine - yucky, addiction. i know i will quit, but that is because i want to.

my Dom tells me nothing is bad about me, and when i want to run and hide to have a smoke he does not allow the hiding part - asks for as kiss before i can "freshen up". It messes with my mind - in a good way.

i'm still finding it diffucult to believe that someone could appreciate me with my imperfections - so used to being held to the "perfection" standard. Oh ...that's so telling and warped! Yikes!!!

_____________________________

-Babysburnin

"Love is, above all else, the gift of oneself."
- Jean Anouilh

"The highest proof of virtue is to possess boundless power without abusing it."
- Lord Macaulay

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RE: Smoking Sub? What can be done? - 4/23/2006 10:29:45 PM

MistyMenthal

Posts: 413
Joined: 3/28/2006
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Thank you all for Sharing With me
Your Stories.

Yes I have a passion! But No I also don't want to
wind up on a resperator

I've mad some decisions about my life.
Thank You all!

KISS ME, Misty

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RE: Smoking Sub? What can be done? - 4/24/2006 4:10:48 AM

masterdeltafire

Posts: 81
Joined: 9/26/2005
Status: offline

I also smoke, and I have no problems with the girls doing so either.

Could I quit smoking? maybe, but tried over a dozen times and the hypertension and stress always brings me back to it.

On the flipside, Let's say for giggles what the girl smoked and was totally allergic to it, In that case then probably I would request the girl to take it outside or quit totally. Or if need be, give her something stronger than her need to smoke, an incentive, something she loves more than smoking. Let's say the reward is something simple, if she cuts down one cigarette per day, she is rewards with one orgasm, or a hour of pleasuring herself. Each day she cuts down one cigarette, she gets the reward.

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