Collars as Mere Symbols

Collars as Mere Symbols (Full Version)

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RiotGirl -> Collars as Mere Symbols (4/23/2006 8:54:58 AM)
Ever since it was first put around my neck, it ment the world to me. Himself taking it off literally had me breathless with anxiety, with him usually reassuring me "its just being cleaned". Yet i'd sit there anxious as all get out. Impatient, wanting it back on, wishing that the dang cleaning would hurry up. i think it was off my neck 2 times in the first year. 18 months later. Well. It dawned on me that its just a mere symbol. It doesnt mean all i thought it ment. On, off - its all the same very thing. i always thought it implied ownership, consent - that with out it, everything stopped. With out it, i'm not his slave, he's not my Master. Heck, i'd even go to say that with out it even Him and i were done. Like a tide - it washed everything away. But its not true, its just a mere symbol. This new perspective, well i just find it interesting. i'm actaully sitting here looking at it, contemplating putting it back on.. or not. Himself knows this. Heck he even gave me a brand new lock. As i so brattily checked to see if the key on his key ring was still the right key. i suppose the new lock is to curb my new found curiousity of "lack of meaning". On off i go! It goes against everything i know. What do you mean........... it doesnt mean anything?????? i have yet to make emotional sense of it. Granted i've the whole logical understanding of it as Himself explained to me awhile ago. Almost like a wedding ring. You can take the ring off.. but you're still married. The ring neednt be there to uphold the ceremonial agreement. This new knowledge pretty much fascinates me and i was wondering what others think about collars, their meaning, if they're just symbols.. ect.

Littlepita -> RE: Collars as Mere Symbols (4/23/2006 9:11:40 AM)
Your post just reminded me that I didn't put my collar on yet today. [&:] Yes, I love it and I love the feel of it around my neck. Well, except for sleeping then it bugs me and I have permission to not wear it. I agree that it's just a symbol though. I am owned by my Master in my heart and I don't really need a collar or anything else to feel that fact.

twicehappy -> RE: Collars as Mere Symbols (4/23/2006 9:15:45 AM)
Lol, you slay me, yet it is something to ponder. You had best hope he does not email my Master, Scooter, because mine is solid polished stainless steel, requires tools to be removed and is virtually impossible for the one wearing it to do so.

dave1212 -> RE: Collars as Mere Symbols (4/23/2006 9:22:09 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: twicehappy You had best hope he does not email my Master, Scooter, because mine is solid polished stainless steel, requires tools to be removed and is virtually impossible for the one wearing it to do so. Oooops that's torn it twicehappy they had better watchout ..~grins~

pgqosk -> RE: Collars as Mere Symbols (4/23/2006 9:23:56 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Littlepita Yes, I love it and I love the feel of it around my neck. Well, except for sleeping then it bugs me and I have permission to not wear it. I agree that it's just a symbol though. I am owned by my Master in my heart and I don't really need a collar or anything else to feel that fact. I think this is the right feelign to have about a collar. It is a symbol, and it is in the heart AND MIND that a Dom owns that which his submissive has bestowed upon him. I think it is also very much a useful tool during play too... but that is off the subject. [;)] LOL Steven--

KnightofMists -> RE: Collars as Mere Symbols (4/23/2006 9:30:07 AM)
Riot for the short time I been around here... I have watched you grow slowly.... I am enjoying it. You right the collar in of itself is a Mere Symbol... but what it symbolizes is what is priceless! Too many hold on to the collar has a meaning as the focus!.... when the focus should be on the devotions the commitment, the very things that brought the collar into being in the first place. good to see you are directing and focusing yourself on what is going to make your relationship work and not a mere item that symbolizes it. editted for wording errors

ownedgirlie -> RE: Collars as Mere Symbols (4/23/2006 9:33:16 AM)
Mine has never been removed since placed on me. It is a symbol, yes, but I would certainly feel naked and awkward without it.

twicehappy -> RE: Collars as Mere Symbols (4/23/2006 9:46:58 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: dave1212 quote: ORIGINAL: twicehappy You had best hope he does not email my Master, Scooter, because mine is solid polished stainless steel, requires tools to be removed and is virtually impossible for the one wearing it to do so. Oooops that's torn it twicehappy they had better watchout ..~grins~ I am confused, what out for what? Large magnets? A tool and die maker? (Lol, my Master is one)...... grins back

Proprietrix -> RE: Collars as Mere Symbols (4/23/2006 9:50:19 AM)
To us symbolic interactionists, it's a very significant thing. [;)]

RiotGirl -> RE: Collars as Mere Symbols (4/23/2006 10:35:22 AM)
quote: Lol, you slay me, yet it is something to ponder. You had best hope he does not email my Master, Scooter, because mine is solid polished stainless steel, requires tools to be removed and is virtually impossible for the one wearing it to do so. LOL good luck! <chuckles> Yes, he's looking for a more permament one. He's never been 100% pleased with my collar as he knows that with bolt cutters i could quite easily take it off. heh (never tired it though....) Yet, if its just a symbol, why am i wearing it? i dont need a symbol. And on top of that, why does it please him that i wear it? i dont quite understand the who ha about it anymore. Why would it please him if i am wearing one that :"never" comes off. Or one he cant possible see me ever able to take off. (yes he's thought of it, before i found my curiousity of on.off) Perhaps, he enjoys seeing the symbol? Could anyone possibly explain that to me? Though i know everyone is different.. Any chance a few other Dom's out there could explain why it pleases them to see a a collar around their sub/slaves neck? i suppose i could equate it to wearing a ring when married. Why wear a ring? Though i wouldnt quite understand that one either.... maybe i'm just feeling snotty today?

RiotGirl -> RE: Collars as Mere Symbols (4/23/2006 10:44:50 AM)
quote: Riot for the short time I been around here... I have watched you grow slowly.... I am enjoying it. You right the collar in of itself is a Mere Symbol... but what it symbolizes is what is priceless! Too many hold on to the collar has a meaning as the focus!.... when the focus should be on the devotions the commitment, the very things that brought the collar into being in the first place. good to see you are directing and focusing yourself on what is going to make your relationship work and not a mere item that symbolizes it. editted for wording errors Thank you Knight, i'm glad you are enjoying it. i suppose this post actually answers the question. If its a mere symbol, why wear it? Because what it symbolizes is priceless. Yes i do focus (sometimes i think too much) on my relationship and Himself - which oddly in turn directs my focus to me. As in, "i need to change this to do better" or "changing this would please him" Usually tho i focus waaaaaaaay to much on him. Which is what most of my pissiness is about. i have noticed that whatever mood i am in, always (unfortunetly) directly relates to Himself. <sigh> Generally i wish that it wasnt so. i think i depend way too much on him for everything so in turn i try not too. heh. Everything i do, is becase of that man - good and bad alike. <sigh> i wish it didnt. - back to your regual schedule programming of collars

ShiftedJewel -> RE: Collars as Mere Symbols (4/23/2006 10:47:00 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: RiotGirl quote: Lol, you slay me, yet it is something to ponder. You had best hope he does not email my Master, Scooter, because mine is solid polished stainless steel, requires tools to be removed and is virtually impossible for the one wearing it to do so. LOL good luck! <chuckles> Yes, he's looking for a more permament one. He's never been 100% pleased with my collar as he knows that with bolt cutters i could quite easily take it off. heh (never tired it though....) Yet, if its just a symbol, why am i wearing it? i dont need a symbol. And on top of that, why does it please him that i wear it? i dont quite understand the who ha about it anymore. Why would it please him if i am wearing one that :"never" comes off. Or one he cant possible see me ever able to take off. (yes he's thought of it, before i found my curiousity of on.off) Perhaps, he enjoys seeing the symbol? Could anyone possibly explain that to me? Though i know everyone is different.. Any chance a few other Dom's out there could explain why it pleases them to see a a collar around their sub/slaves neck? i suppose i could equate it to wearing a ring when married. Why wear a ring? Though i wouldnt quite understand that one either.... maybe i'm just feeling snotty today? Although I believe it's only a symbol of what we share, I do prefer that she wear it all the time because the outside world can't see what we share, they can't see what's in our hearts but they can see the symbols of our love and devotion to each other. Twice isn't the only one that wears a "collar" here. Her's is just a more obvious one. We all wear symbols of our devotion. Scooter and I wear our wedding rings, but beyond that, he wears a silver rope that symbolizes our bond in the lifestyle just as my silver choker says the same about me. *As corny as it sounds, somedays I just really like reaching across the bed, half asleep, and feeling that cold steel on her neck.*

Rule -> RE: Collars as Mere Symbols (4/23/2006 10:58:34 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: RiotGirl Usually tho i focus waaaaaaaay to much on him. ... i have noticed that whatever mood i am in, always (unfortunetly) directly relates to Himself. It is what a kajira does, RiotGirl. Do not worry about it. That is part of being a kajira.

MistWalker -> RE: Collars as Mere Symbols (4/23/2006 11:03:20 AM)
hmmm, reminds me mine is supposed to go back on today, but i do agree it is only a symbol in most cases of a much deeper bond. the collar its self an outward sign of whats shared,whats given/taken for you and all to see im similar myself in the thoughts presented.. my first years i wouldnt take the collar off or have it removed for anything. more ove grown and realized, that bit of leather and steel means no more in reality then the band of silver on my finger. wich is not to say neither mean nothing. they have very great meaning. but they also do not have to be in place for that meaning to remain in my mind. though in all honestly i dont like going for very long with out either in place. but some situations do reqire the collar be absent unfortunitly... Mistresess wishes there, as it were mine it would stay on no matter were we went. anyway way..i shall cease rambeling now.

kyraofMists -> RE: Collars as Mere Symbols (4/23/2006 11:05:47 AM)
I do not often have the opportunity to wear my collar, so on or off it does not make much difference to me. I enjoy wearing it, but it is what the collar symbolizes that is important and not the actual piece of leather. Knight's kyra

twicehappy -> RE: Collars as Mere Symbols (4/23/2006 11:10:11 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: *ShiftedJewel of PhoenixRisen* *As corny as it sounds, somedays I just really like reaching across the bed, half asleep, and feeling that cold steel on her neck.* Mistress actually does this, sometimes when she is dead asleep. I love it; it is quietly reassuring to me like being held. Though i still have not figured out how she can be on one side of the bed and reach me, across Master, to do this. It is a king size bed and she is a very petite lady.

RiotGirl -> RE: Collars as Mere Symbols (4/23/2006 11:29:07 AM)
quote: Although I believe it's only a symbol of what we share, I do prefer that she wear it all the time because the outside world can't see what we share, they can't see what's in our hearts but they can see the symbols of our love and devotion to each other. Twice isn't the only one that wears a "collar" here. Her's is just a more obvious one. We all wear symbols of our devotion. Scooter and I wear our wedding rings, but beyond that, he wears a silver rope that symbolizes our bond in the lifestyle just as my silver choker says the same about me. As corny as it sounds, somedays I just really like reaching across the bed, half asleep, and feeling that cold steel on her neck. hmmm and aaaah. i sort of understand now. Himself has also said its like to show others.. or for others, i dont quite remember, but then its not quite as he likes to see it. Its for him. So the answer is "to show others what you share and because its nice to see it as a reminder to yourself"?

RiotGirl -> RE: Collars as Mere Symbols (4/23/2006 11:32:39 AM)
quote: It is what a kajira does, RiotGirl. Do not worry about it. That is part of being a kajira. lol i'm not a kajira! It seems others seem to agree with Jewel's thoughts. Thats cute Twice. i can see how she does it, but then i'm really petite too. Size just means nothing. She can, cos she wants too. LOL

Nosathro -> RE: Collars as Mere Symbols (4/23/2006 11:55:02 AM)
Tal and greetings I have read many posts about collars, some made with velcro. Not my idea and I make my own collars with locks. For me a collar is a symbol, a strong one! A slave should understand the reason for a collar and so should a Master/Mistress. Yes it is much like a wedding ring but it far more than that. I wish you well Nosathro

ICGsteve -> RE: Collars as Mere Symbols (4/23/2006 12:42:58 PM)
A wedding ring indentifies one as married, a collar indentifies one as owned, or more accuratly would identify one as owned if there was agreement about what the definition of "owned" is. Currently the collar has no firm meaning BEACAUSE slave has no firm meaning. If the community or an event sets a standard for what a collar means, that one is not entitled to wear one unless they feel that they as an individual accepts that meaning and conforms to the definition, then a collar would mean a lot more than it does not. Right now a collar means what ever the couple or small group (ie a poly relationship) wants it to mean.

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