RE: Suggestions for collarme

RE: Suggestions for collarme (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Off the Grid

Message

SpiritedRadiance -> RE: Suggestions for collarme (10/4/2010 11:32:05 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WyldHrt Maybe not every one, as some folks are just new and frustrated, but there are a few repeat offenders I can think of... [;)] I think people that bitch about a great free site that offers awesomeness and such, should have their privileges of that free site revoked for a bit. If yall want fet so much the site is there, CM is great on what it has and what it offers.

LaTigresse -> RE: Suggestions for collarme (10/5/2010 4:21:09 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Lockit I hate fetlife... my suggestion would be to go no where near being like fetlife! We have chat rooms here, we have profiles that are far easier to use than fetlife and we can start a thread that goes on for years, with people chatting away on whatever topic they created. All without black pages and having to join a sect or searching all over hell to find them. I love the search here, everything and everyone is easy to find! I love the new mail features! Thank you CM! The email features here are far superior to anywhere, any networking site or chat/board site I have been to! Please don't change too much! This. I prefer the formatting here far far more than Fet. Unfortunately this joint has become utterly boring to me lately, for the most part. It seems like the whiny bunch brought in the nannies and ran off the posters that made the place worth hanging out. That's just me and my opinion.....

barelynangel -> RE: Suggestions for collarme (10/5/2010 4:49:43 AM)
The fetlife color scheme doesn't bother me i actually like it better than the norm, but either way doesn't bother me. However, i don't think the person who mentioned fetlife was speaking of the color scheme but was speaking of how they do the groups -- i don't know how the formatting became the focus. I do however dislike the group concept on fetlife and enjoy this style of message board so much better. Honestly folks, many of you bitch about people posting about fakers etc as there are people posting about same, so maybe a suggestion for collarme is -- when you don't like a thread ignore it. Since its so hard for many people to do, maybe they can create an ignore thread or block thread and that way the posters who don't have the self-control to ignore a thread they can block it or hide it. Or maybe instead of locking a thread there may be a way for the mods to hide the thread from certain users who just don't stop when they indicate they should stop. I do like the suggestion about more options in the ident concept or even multiple choice -- i think however that may take a lot of behind the scene change due to searches. I would like to be able to disqualify people from appearing on your search -- i.e., married or in a relationship -- those that don't have couple profiles, poly etc. You get the picture. Also, i think it would be better if we can decide if we want to be seen browsing profiles -- rather then showing up under the who's viewing me. A lot of time after reading a profile i am not interested but because they saw me view, they contact me. Maybe instead you can have send a wink or wave or something for those who are interested in so they know yu viewed their profile. (This may also cut down on the 1000292093878.15 emails you get with just hello. But that look over ability now is pretty cool. The only way now not to be seen is to hide your profile and even that doesn't always work. This site is one i prefer, while there are always suggestions and changes i could think of, its not something necessary for me, however, i do appreciate the mods stepping things up in trying to keep topics on topic instead of allowing them to go really off tangent or dissolve into a bandwagon bitch session. angel

soul2share -> RE: Suggestions for collarme (10/5/2010 7:04:08 AM)
LaT, I have to agree with you.....all the regular posters who made this a fun and informative place to hang out have just gone poof, and I really don't come here much anymore. All the attitudes and whining are getting ancient......hell, the train wrecks aren't even fun anymore! [>:] Personally, between here and fetlife, I'll choose here......I can't remember the last time I was on FL......

LadyPact -> RE: Suggestions for collarme (10/5/2010 7:12:22 AM)
I noticed collarme is looking for suggestions. A few thoughts of my own... 1. Give us users the ability to create and maintain our own chat groups, like on fetlife. [:)] This is actually one of the reasons that I prefer CM. All of the posts that are created are easily enough found through the minimal separate boards. There are far too many groups on Fet. 2. Give us more options for our profile orientations. Dominant, submissive, slave and switch just doesn't seem to be enough. [&o] This one, I actually agree with you on. The ones that I think are missing most are those of Top and bottom. There are many people that are into kink that are not interested in the aspect of power dynamics. Not only would these selections be better fitting for those who are not interested in anything more than play, those who want a full dynamic would be better allow to search for folks who want more than just play. 3. It would be cool to have more formatting control of our profiles. [:)] I'm rather indifferent to this one. If they added more bells and whistles, that would be fine. At the same time, I'm fine with the formatting the way it is. 4. Try to get rid of the spam and troll accounts. This is where a lot of people are mistaken. The members are the ones with the options to reduce this. The question is, are you doing your part to make this happen? Recently, the site added a new spam feature. If you are getting form letters, messages from folks who haven't read your profile, or sending something that just says "hi", are you taking the time to go to the report message page and reporting it for spam? If you got it in your mail and you didn't want it, the solution is to report it. The new spam filter has done wonders around here, but people have to do their part to make it work.

samboct -> RE: Suggestions for collarme (10/5/2010 7:13:53 AM)
From my perspective- the major problem of this site- and this is known to some of the admin people- is that anonymity brings out some of the worst in people. There's been a downward spiral of rudeness and I suspect that some way to either reward people that respond to their emails or discourage those who send one liners is needed. I've been on sites where there are transactions taking place- and a user rating scheme of the transaction has helped clean things up terrifically. I keep toying with some kind of notion like that for this site. Finding a way to increase the number of positive interactions compared to negative interactions will bring fresh faces. Sam

Kana -> RE: Suggestions for collarme (10/5/2010 7:14:50 AM)
My only beef is that they surround the mail box icon with ads. That I don't care for one whit.

mnottertail -> RE: Suggestions for collarme (10/5/2010 7:23:35 AM)
I'd like to see Gordon Ramsay have a video forum out here.

jbcurious -> RE: Suggestions for collarme (10/5/2010 7:24:27 AM)
I would like to see a Europe search option... right now one needs to choose a specific country or leave it open to the entire world...

sunshinemiss -> RE: Suggestions for collarme (10/5/2010 7:40:33 AM)
Nice to see you back JB. Was thinking of you just the other day. I used to go on chat years ago, but don't anymore. There was a big change over. Granted, I was rarely going there anyway, but it was an option. Now I can almost never get in a chat room. A couple other folks who have been in the room I used to go to have said the same thing. I asked them what they do, and they say "refresh the page 20 or 30 times." Yeah, I'm so not doing that. I tried downloading mirc on my new computer, but it was rejected. Ohhhh what a mess it was! One thing I do like over on FL is that there is A LOT more non-kink stuff to discuss... of course that could be the groups I joined. (Turns out I'm a prude)... I get kind of creeped out by the same topics over and over and over and over and over again. (That's my own fault for not bringing up other topics, though). I have found that here, though, when I've brought up serious non-sexual / non-kink topics they get ignored or whatnot. That's about the clientele, not the site itself though. Oh, hey! How can I not have to see the pix of people on my "who's viewing me" page? I have had to look at the same woman's bidness for months now. I can't figure out how to "hide" that person from the page. I used to know. Maybe I'm getting ... what was I saying? I love all the photos (and how certain threads are just purrrrific) and can be utilized... yes that's the word UTILIZED over and over again. And I would like to have a :: thud :: emoticon. ...And a date with VAA. (and LaT) and that hot bald guy that's on one of the current ads. "Date" may be a euphemism in this context. Best, sunshine

diablarosa -> RE: Suggestions for collarme (10/5/2010 8:26:52 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SpiritedRadiance quote: ORIGINAL: diablarosa Oh I use stupid people as a catch-all for time wasters, lame online role players, trolls, fake profiles, and one-liner types. Don't mind me! And whos to say that a time waster for you isnt the perfect mate for myself? Its simple ...talk to the people who are compatible to you, block/delete/ignore those who arent. Personally I would love to see cm get rid of anyone who bitches about fakes time wasters and the likes.... cm isn't the only place that's free on the web. Facebook, twitter, fetlife, livejournal, myspace, vimeo, blah blah blah. all of these sites encourage feedback and enforce their policies about abuse, so I'm not sure what your point is. You say its simple...talk to the people who are compatible with you. Well its not always that easy. plenty of "internet things" like to talk your ear off here then go up in smoke and you get the feeling they've done it to more than one person. its not like you can really filter out that from happening on a website with controls, because there is a cultural sort of thing going on here... cm has become a haven for spammers and BDSM BS. That accepted norms of conduct somehow need to change.

diablarosa -> RE: Suggestions for collarme (10/5/2010 8:33:56 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: samboct From my perspective- the major problem of this site- and this is known to some of the admin people- is that anonymity brings out some of the worst in people. There's been a downward spiral of rudeness and I suspect that some way to either reward people that respond to their emails or discourage those who send one liners is needed. I've been on sites where there are transactions taking place- and a user rating scheme of the transaction has helped clean things up terrifically. I keep toying with some kind of notion like that for this site. Finding a way to increase the number of positive interactions compared to negative interactions will bring fresh faces. Sam That's not a bad idea, Sam. not a bad idea at all. That goes right to what I was talking about in changing the "culture" ...the way of doing things here and elsewhere. Whatever the idea is, it has to be something that is a game changer and encourages honesty and discourages idiocy.

sunshinemiss -> RE: Suggestions for collarme (10/5/2010 8:37:55 AM)
Not to be a naysayer, but how does that work? Increase the number of positive interactions... and yet encourage honesty... Sorry, but not all honesty is positive. That has actually been one of the most important lessons I've learned here at CM. I'm deeply grateful for it too! I'd rather have honesty than positive. I do get the point that some more focus on the positive is a worthwhile thing. But dang, I don't want to be a Stepford Wife. Best, sunshine

samboct -> RE: Suggestions for collarme (10/5/2010 8:45:32 AM)
Yah-but it's a bit challenging to structure. Here are my thoughts and some possible issues- In terms of reducing the number of annoying emails- simply tie it to being blocked. As an example, if you get blocked from say 5 users in a day, your email privileges are revoked for a week/month/ whatever. This would need to be tied to actually receiving an email so a user couldn't go on a blocking rampage and block random folks....This would probably be the easiest change to implement- but I may have overlooked a flaw. Allow users to rate an email on some kind of scale- probably -1 (annoying) 0 neutral, +1 well thought out. I thought about some type of score that would indicate which users actually respond to emails, but the problem is that the folks who get lots of emails and get swamped will have low scores- even if they respond to the polite emails. So there has to be a rating system tied to percentages of polite emails responded to. Somehow this is getting cumbersome, so I'm not too crazy about the idea.... Cheers, Sam

LadyPact -> RE: Suggestions for collarme (10/5/2010 9:34:04 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: samboct Yah-but it's a bit challenging to structure. Here are my thoughts and some possible issues- In terms of reducing the number of annoying emails- simply tie it to being blocked. As an example, if you get blocked from say 5 users in a day, your email privileges are revoked for a week/month/ whatever. This would need to be tied to actually receiving an email so a user couldn't go on a blocking rampage and block random folks....This would probably be the easiest change to implement- but I may have overlooked a flaw. From My understanding, this is something of the way the new spam filter works, with one major exception. It isn't the blocking of another person that does it. Rather it is the reporting of the message as spam. If a person initiates messages that the recipient doesn't want to receive, they can be reported as spam so the initiator is flagged. Once multiple reports have been made, their mail privileges are revoked for a period of time. It does not work just by blocking, as a person can block another without any contact being initiated. quote: Allow users to rate an email on some kind of scale- probably -1 (annoying) 0 neutral, +1 well thought out. I thought about some type of score that would indicate which users actually respond to emails, but the problem is that the folks who get lots of emails and get swamped will have low scores- even if they respond to the polite emails. So there has to be a rating system tied to percentages of polite emails responded to. Somehow this is getting cumbersome, so I'm not too crazy about the idea.... Cheers, Sam The problem with this, as you pointed out, is that it automatically gives a disadvantage to women. Let's say I get an email from across the country from someone who has it in their head that I have to be willing to talk about strap on play with him. He sends Me mail, and I reply that I have no intention of talking about sexual matters with him. He gets to rate Me negatively. The next mail I get is from someone into cross dressing, which is on My profile as being on My "hates" list. He also gets to rate Me negatively. So on and so forth. Basically, if I don't kiss the ass of everybody who wants to contact Me about topics that I don't wish to discuss, My rating goes low. It really works the same way for males. All of those people who contact looking for clients of some form or another. Those profiles would have just as much right to rate you negatively, just because you won't send them money over the net. Also, since people aren't restricted to just one profile (let's say for discussion's sake that I have five), I could decide to write the same person, and rate them negatively multiple times. That person might not have done a thing and I could just give them a lower rating because I have an ax to grind.

LadyHibiscus -> RE: Suggestions for collarme (10/5/2010 9:57:18 AM)
I still come to both places every day, Fet because I have groups to moderate, here because my peeps are in PRS! I know I am one of the few people who finds it easier to read light text on a dark background... but DemonKia has the workaround for the rest of you! It would be lovely if the douchecanoes would just paddle themselves away, but that isn't going to happen. And, they have just as much "right" to be here as anyone. What those of us who don't care for them have to do is REPORT HIDE IGNORE and stop feeding the trolls. Simple as that.

samboct -> RE: Suggestions for collarme (10/5/2010 10:01:23 AM)
Hi LadyPact Two separate issues- In terms of the one liners and the spam filter...I must admit, I don't consider email from a "girl in Wisconsin into nude sunbathing" spam, although perhaps I should. I tend to reserve reporting a post as spam for the "Hello. I am Mrs. Nrzahinia from Nigeria and I need your help. I am a widow and my husband's bank account has been frozen...." Since I really don't get too many of the first kind of emails and they often come with pretty pictures, I don't worry about it too much. But what I've gathered is that women tend to get a lot of "suck on this bitch!!!" emails from people that may be genuine users- just rather rude. Since they're not looking for money, is it spam? But it's clearly offensive to most recipients and I think it should be discouraged. Hence my suggestion linking blocking to email privileges. Don't know if it's really necessary though... In terms of your hypothetical email exchange with someone who wants info from you on cross dressing. What I was envisaging was that the original email to you gets rated by you. Lets say that it's not one line, but really on a topic that you have no interest in- hence rate it a zero. You send back a short- gee, not interested- try reading my profile response to the bozo. Why should he need to rate your response? I suspect that the problem isn't rude responses to polite inquiries- it's rude inquiries period. That you sent a response gets you the +1 brownie point. What I'm worried about is that this will just heterodyne viciously. A polite soul such as yourself who sends out lots of responses- shows as a good responder. Well, then everybody sees this and says, gee, if I send LadyPact an email, she'll actually respond. At which point, you get deluged with emails and get rightfully aggravated and come looking for me with a whip and a gun and I take to the hills (well, around here- woods).....Like I said- there are some issues that I haven't been able to work out. Sam

LadyPact -> RE: Suggestions for collarme (10/5/2010 10:26:43 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: samboct Hi LadyPact Two separate issues- In terms of the one liners and the spam filter...I must admit, I don't consider email from a "girl in Wisconsin into nude sunbathing" spam, although perhaps I should. I tend to reserve reporting a post as spam for the "Hello. I am Mrs. Nrzahinia from Nigeria and I need your help. I am a widow and my husband's bank account has been frozen...." Since I really don't get too many of the first kind of emails and they often come with pretty pictures, I don't worry about it too much. But what I've gathered is that women tend to get a lot of "suck on this bitch!!!" emails from people that may be genuine users- just rather rude. Since they're not looking for money, is it spam? But it's clearly offensive to most recipients and I think it should be discouraged. Hence my suggestion linking blocking to email privileges. Don't know if it's really necessary though... We may be looking at this differently. The second example of the type of mail that you say you receive is more of what is considered SCAM mail, rather than SPAM. They have a separate option for that when you hit "report user". Scam is the one just above spam and has a different category. Spam is any random contact for promotion of services, products, or people that a person doesn't want to receive. The negative example that you listed (suck it) is just one type. Other types are the form letter (cut and paste), silly messages that say "hi Mistress", or the mass mailings that are often referred to as the buckshot approach. I have two categories of people that I have listed in My profile that I am willing to receive mail from. One is people from the forums and the other is people local to Me. Just about anything else, I consider spam. I have no desire to be contacted from people across the country or across the globe that I've never heard from. quote: In terms of your hypothetical email exchange with someone who wants info from you on cross dressing. What I was envisaging was that the original email to you gets rated by you. Lets say that it's not one line, but really on a topic that you have no interest in- hence rate it a zero. You send back a short- gee, not interested- try reading my profile response to the bozo. Why should he need to rate your response? I suspect that the problem isn't rude responses to polite inquiries- it's rude inquiries period. That you sent a response gets you the +1 brownie point. What I'm worried about is that this will just heterodyne viciously. A polite soul such as yourself who sends out lots of responses- shows as a good responder. Well, then everybody sees this and says, gee, if I send LadyPact an email, she'll actually respond. At which point, you get deluged with emails and get rightfully aggravated and come looking for me with a whip and a gun and I take to the hills (well, around here- woods).....Like I said- there are some issues that I haven't been able to work out. Sam Ah, so you are saying that only the receiver of the initial contact is the one who would be permitted to rate the exchange? In this, I was confused because I was thinking that any correspondence, as long as it was in a person's inbox could be rated. I have to say that I'm not sure that would be the best plan, either.

barelynangel -> RE: Suggestions for collarme (10/5/2010 11:09:31 AM)
I don't think that new spam concept is prudent. I mean u send a user to spam just because u don't like their message? Sounds silly to me. Why not just ignore them ? There is to me huge potential for abuse with that as to me anyone who is apt to report spam instead of just ignoring someone is looking to determine what is appropriate communication. I hope your explanation is incorrect LP. If the are going to revoke privileges of people because people reported them as spam simply because they didn't like their approach. There should be an inquiry by cm to confirm malice on the part of the sender. Otherwise the TOS needs to be very clear as to what is expected in an initial send mail. Same thing with blocking as someone suggested. I block people all the time. But I dont agree my decision to block then should have something to do with revoking their privileges. If I feel their post warrant investigation I will use the report button. Blocking someone has nothing to do with violation of TOS but I simply no longer wish to speak to them. To me, grown ups should be capable of blocking people they no longer wish to receive mail from. With the roll over feature now u can preview the message and delete. A good change would be to be able to block the user without opening the message or going to ther profile. Like at the end when u delete it ask u if u and to block the sender also We need to be careful not to demand everyone follow one way of approach. To punish people because u think the should have written s b or c in their initial post or didn't follow ur direction isn't spam. Its people having individuality.

LadyHibiscus -> RE: Suggestions for collarme (10/5/2010 11:16:11 AM)
Cut and paste emails are NOT representing individuality, that is why we are marking them as spam. Someone writing to say Hi Mistress I like your profile, when they have not even VIEWED me, are not being individuals, or treating me as one.

Page: << < prev 1 [2] 3 4 5 next > >>

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

0.1582031