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First time Muncher/Munchee/Munchist - 10/7/2010 8:09:09 PM   
sooheezy


Posts: 17
Joined: 10/5/2010
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After days of deliberation I finally decided that this is the proper forum for me to post this.

I was curious to hear about everyone’s first experience attending an event. I ask because after years of being skeptical and cynical about the whole scene and finally getting comfortable with the idea of dying miserable with someone I hate and who doesn’t get me, I made the choice to actually embrace my sexually deviant side and roll with it.

Needless to say I am a little nervous, I am not exactly sure what I am nervous about, but the nerves are there. I thought that maybe hearing some of the positive experiences would help build up my sorely lacking confidence and hearing the negative experiences will prepare me for any possible trials and tribulations.

I am probably just over thinking all of this.

Anyways, in case anyone is familiar with either of these events and wants to add in something extra, here are the upcoming munches in my area:

http://www.westcoastsocial.com/

and

http://lads.la/munches/next-munch-topic/

On second look, I don’t even know if the CollarMe/westcoastsocial one is a ‘munch.’ I don’t really even know what constitutes a ‘munch.’

Discuss?
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RE: First time Muncher/Munchee/Munchist - 10/7/2010 8:14:24 PM   
DarkSteven


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A munch is just a get together with kinksters in a vanilla setting.  No agenda.  Every one I have attended has met in a bar or restaurant so there is food close at hand.

The LADS one is not what I think of as a munch as it has a formal presentation.  It's on a kink topic too, so that meeting in a vanilla setting is out.




_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

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RE: First time Muncher/Munchee/Munchist - 10/7/2010 8:27:24 PM   
LadyPact


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I have not attended either of the functions that you mentioned.  The West Coast Social that is put on at the Lair is a public dungeon.  A "munch" usually constitutes dinner of some kind in a vanilla location where there is no play or fetish wear.  The Lair is an excellent facility and I have never heard a bad word about Kane.

My first munch was a very quiet affair.  It was back before most munch groups advertised on the net and you literally had to know one of the people attending to even know where it was.  It was a very simple gig.  Thankfully, at that time, I had no preconceived notions on who I was going to meet or what was going to happen.  There weren't that many people but I would definitely say that it was a positive experience for Me.  (I must have done ok, too, because I was invited to the play party.)

Fast forward to now, I've been to munches and/or events in a number of states.  I've never had a bad experience.  Just look at it as a social occasion and like any other gathering of people that have a common interest (such as a book club). 


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(in reply to sooheezy)
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RE: First time Muncher/Munchee/Munchist - 10/7/2010 8:58:52 PM   
sooheezy


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Joined: 10/5/2010
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Thanks for the responses. I should have asked this in the initial post, but is this the proper way of getting involved with the BDSM crowd? I am just trying to find the easiest way to infiltrate your super exclusive club.

Before I found this website I always assumed the only way I was going to find a woman willing to go along with my interests was to pay her ridiculous amounts of money, and still then, it would only be for an hour at a time. Call me a romantic, but I would rather find a woman who wants to call me names and do terrible things to me, because she loves me, not because she is getting paid. I guess I am just old fashioned.

(in reply to LadyPact)
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RE: First time Muncher/Munchee/Munchist - 10/7/2010 9:09:22 PM   
MIsabelah


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Infiltrate? Why would you want to infiltrate a munch- either you're into going or you're not. Nothing secret about that. Why do you have to be stealthy about it? Go to the munch meet some people and if you find someone who clicks with you then roll with it. If you don't continue to go to munches until you do. Personally, I believe the best way to meet someone is always face to face. The internet is simply for convenience and you will likely bump into more drama than you like. At least when you go to a munch if you don't like it you can get up and leave and never go back. While the internet keep you coming and hoping. You don't have to deal with that kind of drama. But of course as always the choice is yours.

(in reply to sooheezy)
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RE: First time Muncher/Munchee/Munchist - 10/7/2010 9:25:14 PM   
sooheezy


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Joined: 10/5/2010
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Maybe I shouldn’t have said infiltrate. I am just big on infiltrating and espionage and clandestine tactics; which explains my massive collection of fake mustaches and cloaks.

I get it though! Thanks for the comment, I suppose it is as simple as either go or don’t and either I will click with someone or I won’t.

(in reply to MIsabelah)
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RE: First time Muncher/Munchee/Munchist - 10/7/2010 9:32:35 PM   
poise


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I'm sure you'd make a great ninja!!!...you could always attend dressed the part.
It would certainly ...break the ice at least.

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When the path ignites a soul, there’s no remaining in place.

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RE: First time Muncher/Munchee/Munchist - 10/7/2010 9:40:33 PM   
MIsabelah


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Joined: 9/7/2010
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You're welcome sweetie spy.

< Message edited by MIsabelah -- 10/7/2010 9:41:52 PM >

(in reply to sooheezy)
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RE: First time Muncher/Munchee/Munchist - 10/7/2010 9:40:50 PM   
sooheezy


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Joined: 10/5/2010
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And blend in with every other ninja attending the party? No thanks; I need something that makes me stand out.

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RE: First time Muncher/Munchee/Munchist - 10/7/2010 9:51:02 PM   
SpiritedRadiance


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Just go sit down and enjoy, my first munch i nearly puked twice before getting into the restaurant. however i MADE it i saw some people i knew from online and now well im just a social butterfly munches events and such every weekend 

_____________________________

"Theres nothing in life like the feeling of cool leather sliding over your skin, the tears that fill your eyes as you realize someone else thinks you deserve it even if you havent reached that conclusion yet"- Forever to remember 11/5/11

(in reply to sooheezy)
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RE: First time Muncher/Munchee/Munchist - 10/7/2010 9:53:41 PM   
sooheezy


Posts: 17
Joined: 10/5/2010
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A tale of nausea and redemption! THAT’S what I was hoping to hear. Thank you!

(in reply to SpiritedRadiance)
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RE: First time Muncher/Munchee/Munchist - 10/7/2010 9:55:56 PM   
SpiritedRadiance


Posts: 1341
Joined: 3/3/2010
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I have anxiety around alot of people still have some when i go to events but when you loose at strip never have i ever and everyone in the group there sees you naked.... well...

you get comfortable quickly.




_____________________________

"Theres nothing in life like the feeling of cool leather sliding over your skin, the tears that fill your eyes as you realize someone else thinks you deserve it even if you havent reached that conclusion yet"- Forever to remember 11/5/11

(in reply to sooheezy)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: First time Muncher/Munchee/Munchist - 10/7/2010 10:01:39 PM   
sooheezy


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Joined: 10/5/2010
Status: offline
I don’t really have a problem strutting around strangers completely naked, I have a body like a Greek god, assuming there is some sort of Greek god of fatty foods. I am more nervous about…I don’t know, it is just a completely new experience and I suppose I have these certain expectations or hopes of what I will get out of it.

That all sounded way more self serving than I meant it to.

(in reply to SpiritedRadiance)
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RE: First time Muncher/Munchee/Munchist - 10/7/2010 10:18:23 PM   
poise


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Even if it fails your initial expectations, which are usually quite daunting from the beginning
what you are giving to yourself is the most rewarding...openly embracing your deviant
side can be quite intoxicating, like elixer for the spirit thats been sober for far too long.

_____________________________

When the path ignites a soul, there’s no remaining in place.

(in reply to sooheezy)
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RE: First time Muncher/Munchee/Munchist - 10/7/2010 10:27:15 PM   
sooheezy


Posts: 17
Joined: 10/5/2010
Status: offline
You are 100% correct and you couldn’t have been more beautifully poetic with the end of your post.

Well done, thank you.

(in reply to poise)
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RE: First time Muncher/Munchee/Munchist - 10/8/2010 4:11:17 AM   
sunshinemiss


Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
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It's just a bunch of folks getting together for lunch / dinner.

I will say that most of the munches I've been to have had a higher than average proportion of socially inept types (perhaps myself being one of them!).I always pretend I'm going to a book club get together, and then realize that a goodly number of people don't like to read the kinds of books I like.  And then... wellllll  I just go back to reading my ever so exciting how to manuals all by myself. 

In seriousness (seriosity?) though, your good sense of humor will stand you in good stead.  Have a good time. 

best,
sunshine

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RE: First time Muncher/Munchee/Munchist - 10/8/2010 5:50:15 AM   
Missokyst


Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline
Meeting + Lunch = Munch
USUALLY they are nothing more than friendly conversation and a meal with other people who enjoy BDSM. No play, no fetishwear, and out in an open public setting so that no one needs to be nervous.
I say usually because recently in my own area a new hellfire group has started up and they call their meetings a munch... but their munches are really play parties where things get groped and grabbed.

The Social you are going to... I WISH I could go! It is probably a bit more than a standard munch. More kinky talk, less "what pervy things can I buy from Lowes?"

Nerves are natural. Hang back a bit until you get the lay of the land then try your best to get involved in any conversation that interests you. And if there is one thing I could tell people it is this.. listen first, so many people try to make all conversations about themselves that they end up shutting down any chance of getting to know other people.


(in reply to sooheezy)
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RE: First time Muncher/Munchee/Munchist - 10/8/2010 5:57:08 AM   
DomImus


Posts: 2004
Joined: 3/17/2009
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I'm not a munch veteran by any means but I've been to a handful of them and have never had any bad experiences, per sé. I've been to one or two hosted by certain groups that I did not wish to revisit but the actual munch was okay - just not my cup of tea. Those were put on by a bdsm club in Atlanta (at the old Sanctuary dungeon) and the crowd just wasn't to my liking. A group of locals used to host a small munch on the west side of town (they may still - haven't been in years) that included a play party later at a private home. I enjoyed those quite a lot. The local bigger munch (the Atlanta Regional Munch at the local big dungeon 1763) is a hit or miss affair. I go there when I do more to people watch than anything else.

I think once you start attending these things you'll have a similar experience. You'll find some that don't suit you and hopefully one or more that will.

(in reply to sooheezy)
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RE: First time Muncher/Munchee/Munchist - 10/8/2010 6:03:56 AM   
daddysliloneds


Posts: 1351
Joined: 6/28/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sooheezy

Thanks for the responses. I should have asked this in the initial post, but is this the proper way of getting involved with the BDSM crowd? I am just trying to find the easiest way to infiltrate your super exclusive club.

Before I found this website I always assumed the only way I was going to find a woman willing to go along with my interests was to pay her ridiculous amounts of money, and still then, it would only be for an hour at a time. Call me a romantic, but I would rather find a woman who wants to call me names and do terrible things to me, because she loves me, not because she is getting paid. I guess I am just old fashioned.



you're over-thinking...

it's just a fucking lunch with like-minded people who live in and/or nearby your town. i attended my first munch, ever, a couple of months back; best thing i ever did for myself. not only did i find other adults to play with in my area, but i also made some new friends to hang-out with in my down time, coffee, lunch, dinner, etc.

basically, there is no 'proper' way to get involved, in as much as, there are easy ways to get involved, and going to a munch is an easy way to do it.

(in reply to sooheezy)
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RE: First time Muncher/Munchee/Munchist - 10/8/2010 6:22:05 AM   
usemetopleaseyou


Posts: 39
Joined: 5/16/2010
Status: offline
quote:

us, I am not exactly sure what I am nervous about, but the nerves are there. I thought that maybe hearing some of the positive experiences would help build up my sorely lacking confidence and hearing the negative experiences


At a munch, you have to be very careful what you order as they whip you if you ask for whipped cream, they spank you if you wear spandex, they tie you spread eagle to the table & sodomize you if you ask for a bananna split, shove ice cubes in your orifice if you order ice cream, squeeze your privates in a vice if you order a side of mashed potatoes, and, for heaven's sake, never ever ask for a sharper steak knife!

(in reply to daddysliloneds)
Profile   Post #: 20
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