RE: the need to feel safe and the need to feel like the group

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RE: the need to feel safe and the need to feel like the... - 10/16/2010 2:48:51 PM

CynthiaWVirginia

Posts: 1915
Joined: 2/28/2010
From: West Virginia, USA
Status: offline

Hello pickmeup.

I went to send you a letter but your profile has been deleted. I hope you come back under a different profile name and give this place a chance. Many of us would befriend you...but you will also have to deal with a lot of asshats in your mailbox. You can either give them power over you by feeling you have to be polite to them every time, just say NO, learn to use the block or delete, or be a little nice but firm and tell them you are not compatible and wish them good luck in their search. If a letter tees me off, sometimes I just let it sit there for a while before dealing with it so I won't say anything I would regret.

Also, most of the people who write letters in your mailbox are not ones who come to the message boards. It can be hard to get used to this place...but it's my favorite site on the web.

Being fresh meat can be overwhelming...maybe next time don't post a pic. Make it a silhouette or blurry or maybe just post a cute pic of something you like. I won't give out any pix online...if someone wants to know what I look like they can meet up with me in a public place to find out.

I left here several times before I finally stayed. Many of us have. I hope you are feeling better soon.

There was some wonderful advice given in this thread...take from it what will help you and toss out the rest.

(in reply to pickmeup)

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RE: the need to feel safe and the need to feel like the... - 10/16/2010 3:02:51 PM

sofldan

Posts: 150
Joined: 11/15/2008
Status: offline

Ok to the corner with you. Stomping your feet and yelling is not going to get you treated like an adult. Secondly welcome to the interwebs it can be a cruel and hard place if your skin is a thin as paper. Third next time you are posting take a breath relax and get your thoughts together and come across as someone who is an adult. And lastly respect is not freely given in my book, to get respect you must give it. It is something that is earned by your way of speaking, your manners, and overall temperament.

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(in reply to SmartAssOrchid)

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RE: the need to feel safe and the need to feel like the... - 10/16/2010 3:06:39 PM

switch2please

Posts: 494
Joined: 12/5/2008
Status: offline

I also look younger than I am but apparently I act older...so it kind of evens out I suppose.
You did get some good advice, and it's always good to read what you've written before posting.
Does it sound too whiny/preachy? Did you type anything you can't support?

(in reply to CynthiaWVirginia)

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Post #: 23

RE: the need to feel safe and the need to feel like the... - 10/16/2010 3:09:40 PM

dreamerdreaming

Posts: 2839
Status: offline

"Profile not found" doesn't mean it is deleted, necessarily. It's more likely that she's just hidden it. Smart move, OP. You can choose when to be visible here.

Be aware that you'll get a lot of spam for showing up as online, and for being new. Ignore, block, delete. If you spend time being angry at all the losers and assholes in the world, limit it. Otherwise you'll just be angry all the time because there are so many of them constantly vying for your attention.

How much of your daily time would you like to spend being angry and annoyed? Five minutes a day? Ten? One minute? None? Make a choice.

Choose your feelings and thoughts well, and be aware that you are the controller of your own actions and reactions. So don't be manipulated. Continue to be proactive in limiting your exposure to the jerks of the world, and don't waste time feeling bad about it.

You're keeping yourself safe. Don't apologize or feel defensive about doing the right thing, and making the right choices for yourself, and your life.

You go, girl!

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(in reply to CynthiaWVirginia)

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RE: the need to feel safe and the need to feel like the... - 10/16/2010 6:24:26 PM

sunshinemiss

Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline

Someone reported you? So what? I've reported people. Doesn't mean I thought I was right. It means I wasn't sure, and I wanted to give the Mods a heads up to what I was thinking, and could they take a second and check it out. Your look and your behavior do make it seem that you are underage. The first part, not your choice. The second part? You created that. Grown ups take responsibility for their actions. Apologizing was a good start. Drinking and posting was stupid. Admitting it was also stupid. Why do we need to know that? You have also just confessed to breaking the law.(I think - I didn't check your whereabouts). 19 year olds can't drink in the USA and other places - they can kill someone if they are a soldier, but can't drink a beer... ahhh but that is another issue.

The internet is a place where every creep imaginable will come here and do his best to do whatever he can. It is your responsibility to not be taken advantage of. The folks above have given you excellent advice. I do hope you will heed it. And lay off the booze. Clearly you can't handle it.
good luck,
sunshine

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(in reply to dreamerdreaming)

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RE: the need to feel safe and the need to feel like the... - 10/16/2010 7:01:47 PM

anniezz338

Posts: 1183
Joined: 8/17/2010
Status: offline

I once saw a 43 yo, 6'2 235lb man jumping up and down in a living room screaming I WANT TO TO BE TREATED LIKE AN ADULT!! Thanks for reminding me of that funny moment....lol.

On a serious note, your OP came across really negative. You may wish to reword. Have a great day~

(in reply to SmartAssOrchid)

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Post #: 26

RE: the need to feel safe and the need to feel like the... - 10/16/2010 7:03:56 PM

poise

Posts: 9509
Joined: 7/3/2010
Status: offline

Was he nekkid?

You should never take them serious unless they are.

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(in reply to anniezz338)

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RE: the need to feel safe and the need to feel like the... - 10/16/2010 7:08:04 PM

anniezz338

Posts: 1183
Joined: 8/17/2010
Status: offline

He might as well have been....it couldn't have been more funny...lol. It's hard to take someone serious when I'm ROFLMAO.

(in reply to poise)

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RE: the need to feel safe and the need to feel like the... - 10/17/2010 4:15:12 PM

sweetsub1957

Posts: 2201
Joined: 4/28/2009
Status: offline

~FR~
Geez OP. First of all, there are a lot of asshats on here. There will be people here that will accuse you of being a guy, accuse you of being under-age, etc. It's the internet, and jerks will be jerks.

That being said, you, also, come across as being very negative. Some good advice has been given here. First, think before you post. Also, try to act more maturely and, for gods sakes, sober up before you touch that keyboard. First impressions are very difficult, if not impossible to change. If I were you, I'd chuck that profile and username and start over....this time acting more maturely. Judging by that OP, it sounds like you need to be put over Someone's knee for awhile and given some corner time. Maybe tha would improve your attitude.

~sweetsub~

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In lowering yourself to talking behind my back, you're perfectly positioned to kiss my ass.

An it harm none, do what ye wilt.

(in reply to anniezz338)

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Post #: 29