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going to the limits - 10/19/2010 8:58:01 AM   
shortmansub


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how do you manage your limits?  How do you determine the excitement of pleasure vs  the point in which you can't take it any more.  Will the dom be insulted
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RE: going to the limits - 10/19/2010 9:08:34 AM   
littleone35


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I know my limits because there are some things i could not bring myself to do. Master would not be insulted because we discussed things beforehand and he knows my limits has many of the same ones. If you are taking about limits during play, well Master knows how much i can take after almost 5 years together. Some times he pushes to see if i can take more. If at that point i can't take anymore he is not insulted not reason to be he was just testing to see. I have a safeword but have never had to use it.

Matt's littleone

< Message edited by littleone35 -- 10/19/2010 9:14:30 AM >

(in reply to shortmansub)
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RE: going to the limits - 10/19/2010 9:10:40 AM   
sexyred1


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I manage my limits by screaming, "stop it this minute or I will have to kill you when we are done."

That sometimes helped. Or I avoid doing things that I know are hard limits. That works too.

(in reply to littleone35)
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RE: going to the limits - 10/19/2010 9:21:05 AM   
GreedyTop


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I avoid crossing limits by saying in a VERY LOUD VOICE:  MOTHERFUCKER!! STOP NOW OR YOU WILL BE LOOKING OVER YOUR SHOULDER UNTIL I KILL YOU!!

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to sexyred1)
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RE: going to the limits - 10/19/2010 9:26:32 AM   
BurntKitty


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quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

I avoid crossing limits by saying in a VERY LOUD VOICE:  MOTHERFUCKER!! STOP NOW OR YOU WILL BE LOOKING OVER YOUR SHOULDER UNTIL I KILL YOU!!


Yup, this sums it all up.


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(in reply to GreedyTop)
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RE: going to the limits - 10/19/2010 9:32:15 AM   
sweetsub1957


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~FR~
Daddy & I plan on pushing my limits but, at the same time, He realizes that there are certain ones that will be hard limits forever and He respects that. I like what GreedyTop said though. lol

~sweetsub~


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Member: Lance's Fag Hags.

"That's not just a chip on her shoulder, that's the whole potato!" ~Lady Angelika~

In lowering yourself to talking behind my back, you're perfectly positioned to kiss my ass.

An it harm none, do what ye wilt.

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RE: going to the limits - 10/19/2010 11:08:30 AM   
Ait


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I have hard and soft limits. I trust My Owner to know when he can push them, because I've made ti clear that pushing is okay. However if I react badly then I won't accept any kind of punishment, not for something I already labeled as a potential red light. Of course, there are something he knows not to fuck with.

We use a contract. If it gets too much then I say so, or even more often I just physically pull away from it. He's never been insulted. Any Dom that's insulted by limits clearly shouldn't be involved with anyone. My four year old niece gets insulted when people tell her no. I expect more from adults.

(in reply to sweetsub1957)
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RE: going to the limits - 10/19/2010 11:46:00 AM   
DesFIP


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You communicate your limits before hand. If he gets insulted that you needed to stop, then he isn't someone you should be playing with. Honorable people won't get pissed off. And you don't want to be with the other kind.

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Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


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RE: going to the limits - 10/19/2010 7:08:02 PM   
LPslittleclip


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my Mistress and i discussed my limits before i was collared. manny things i had not tried so there were few limits. my boundrys are expanding, i have been collared for nearly 3 years now so i trust my Mistress and She knows how to read my body language very well.

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proud to serve the awsome
LadyPact

(in reply to DesFIP)
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RE: going to the limits - 10/20/2010 2:57:35 AM   
tazzygirl


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quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

You communicate your limits before hand. If he gets insulted that you needed to stop, then he isn't someone you should be playing with. Honorable people won't get pissed off. And you don't want to be with the other kind.


This.

Just wanted to add...

They are your limits. If you allow them to be pushed, and find you cant really push past them, then you should be praised for the effort, not dealing with someone else's pouting.

_____________________________

Telling me to take Midol wont help your butthurt.
RIP, my demon-child 5-16-11
Duchess of Dissent 1
Dont judge me because I sin differently than you.
If you want it sugar coated, dont ask me what i think! It would violate TOS.

(in reply to DesFIP)
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RE: going to the limits - 10/20/2010 5:47:21 AM   
CaringandReal


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No clue. ;)

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(in reply to shortmansub)
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RE: going to the limits - 10/20/2010 12:37:56 PM   
leadership527


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quote:

ORIGINAL: shortmansub
how do you manage your limits?  How do you determine the excitement of pleasure vs  the point in which you can't take it any more.  Will the dom be insulted
Being in a TPE relationship, we don't think of limits in this way and certainly not about something like a sexual act or somesuch. In the larger sense, I manage Carol's limits as I think best for us.


_____________________________

~Jeff

I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

(in reply to shortmansub)
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RE: going to the limits - 10/20/2010 1:19:12 PM   
agirl


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quote:

ORIGINAL: leadership527

quote:

ORIGINAL: shortmansub
how do you manage your limits?  How do you determine the excitement of pleasure vs  the point in which you can't take it any more.  Will the dom be insulted
Being in a TPE relationship, we don't think of limits in this way and certainly not about something like a sexual act or somesuch. In the larger sense, I manage Carol's limits as I think best for us.



Much like Jeff and Carol, we don't even think of limits in the *lifestyle sense* at all. We haven't ever discussed it.

At most he'd be mildly amused if I wanted to stop something....and far from insulted.

agirl







(in reply to leadership527)
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RE: going to the limits - 10/20/2010 1:46:01 PM   
switch2please


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He knows my limits and which ones are somewhat flexible. His translation of my body language is also remarkably accurate.
There are some things he knows better than to fuck with, and I trust him to respect hard limits. I've only had to use my safeword when he's pouring wine to mean 'that's enough' - if I didn't, he might forget what my safeword is...

(in reply to agirl)
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RE: going to the limits - 10/20/2010 4:14:42 PM   
littlewonder


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I manage my limits by having a Master who has virtually the same limits as myself and we also communicate....always and when he feels he can push a little more he does. He watches my body language, he listens to me and knows me well because he's taken the time to do so.


(in reply to switch2please)
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RE: going to the limits - 10/20/2010 6:03:03 PM   
camille65


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Joined: 7/11/2007
From: Austin Texas
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quote:

ORIGINAL: leadership527

quote:

ORIGINAL: shortmansub
how do you manage your limits?  How do you determine the excitement of pleasure vs  the point in which you can't take it any more.  Will the dom be insulted
Being in a TPE relationship, we don't think of limits in this way and certainly not about something like a sexual act or somesuch. In the larger sense, I manage Carol's limits as I think best for us.



That is closest to how I feel. What most call Hard Limits, I consider to be moral choices. I wouldn't be with an Owner who didn't align with those moral choices so the idea of going past them doesn't even exist.

Otherwise it is all up to him. He pushes me sexually as far as he wants, or keeps me where I am if he wants. I wouldn't want it any other way, it would be.. stressful, difficult, unnatural, tedious etc etc for me to try and guard my sexual self from my Owner. It would also be self-defeating in a way because I belong to him.

_____________________________


~Love your life! (It is the only one you'll get).




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RE: going to the limits - 10/20/2010 8:49:36 PM   
anniezz338


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Some things seem to work and some do not for me. I read The Loving Dominant and it made sense saying to have a caution safe word. It's not a stop or go but just slows things down a bit. Any Dom worth his salt knows your submission is a gift and will respect your limits.

(in reply to camille65)
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RE: going to the limits - 10/20/2010 10:02:22 PM   
tazzygirl


Posts: 37833
Joined: 10/12/2007
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I dont regard my submission as a gift. But that has been the subject of many, many threads here. Suffice it to say, his dominance calls to my submission, just depends on how hard he is calling.

_____________________________

Telling me to take Midol wont help your butthurt.
RIP, my demon-child 5-16-11
Duchess of Dissent 1
Dont judge me because I sin differently than you.
If you want it sugar coated, dont ask me what i think! It would violate TOS.

(in reply to anniezz338)
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RE: going to the limits - 10/20/2010 11:38:57 PM   
leakylee


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Joined: 7/2/2004
Status: offline
i mange my limits by knowing my partners.. having Sir's permission, and having levels of limits for each relationship. Casual bottoming or being loaned out doesn't get the same benefits that a play partner would. Someone that i am dating gets lots more. Sir, i have no limits with.

Now before i start something, i trust Him completely. i know that He would never push me beyond what i can endure or what is safe. i personally don't recommend a no limits situation, unless you are positive of what you are getting into.

smooches
girl lee


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I am so not right, that I left..

(in reply to shortmansub)
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RE: going to the limits - 10/20/2010 11:45:06 PM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline
camille!!!  Lee!!!

*hugs*

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to leakylee)
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