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RE: Application for Servitude? - 11/5/2010 8:10:58 PM   
hausboy


Posts: 2360
Joined: 9/5/2010
Status: offline 		Hi sunshine

It wasn't like....  hi...let's go on a date....and please fill out this paperwork so we can proceed to the compatibility portion...it was long after we had met, realized we had a strong connection, and we wanted to explore a lot further.

I use the "application" approach after we've established a certain rapport, trust and mutual attraction.  We had a frank and open discussion about engaging in her fantasies--I was experienced--she only knew what she had read in fiction.  She didn't really know what she wanted.....and what she didn't....and the "survey"--the application--provided her with a menu of options, and she said was shy about talking about it, and when I would discuss it with her, I got a lot of "I don't knows....I'm not sure.... I'll do anything...."

When I gave her the application?  She not only filled it out, she wrote ALL over it....and suddenly not only did have a much clearer picture, but so did she.  She knew it would be 100% for my eyes only....she could write whatever she wanted and no one would see it but me.

Essentially things that she had done before...and liked.  Things that she did not like.  Things that that hadn't done but was interested in trying.  Things that scared her..but she wanted to try.  It's really not hugely different from what I see in folk's profiles-- plus she wrote about her fantasies, wrote down any "hot spots" on her body that could illicit emotions/feelings that would not be enjoyable; she told me the places on her body that she liked touch...and those she didn't.

It wasn't as cold and businesslike as some folks make it sound, and I would NEVER deliver it via email.  Not my style.





(in reply to sunshinemiss)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Application for Servitude? - 11/5/2010 8:37:19 PM   
Malkinius


Posts: 1814
Joined: 1/9/2004
Status: offline 		Greetings Rexeena.....

I use something that could be considered an application form when I get far enough along with a potential slave that they say they want to train with me, or be owned by me. It is a series of standard and person specific questions that I have been doing for a number of years now with some success. If the person is unwilling to answer them the discussion stops there. They are designed to learn about the person, make them think about some possibilities and for them to learn about me by the questions I ask. I also go over and discuss their answers. The flip side of this is that I require the potential slave to ask me questions about myself, what I do, why I do things and anything she wants to know about the process or what will happen. When she runs out of those questions I keep forcing her to ask questions on any topic to see what all she comes up with. I have been doing these three at a time alternating my asking her the slave asking questions.

This means I force a lot of information transfer and communication. It also means I have to be about as transparent as I require of a slave. It makes a good, if sometimes frustrating for the potential slave when they run out of questions, way to really get to know someone. Whenever possible, I do other things as well before things happen offline. It may mean either of us decide it is not a path we want to travel together or it makes for a tighter Master/slave working relationship from the beginning. It also develops lots of trust from early on. That is something most people do not concentrate on doing. All too often because they are hiding things and don't want the other person to really know what is going on.

Be well....

Malkinius


_____________________________

A questioner by inclination...An Auctioneer for the fun of it
http://www.HouseMalkinius.com    The goal is community.

(in reply to Rexeena)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Application for Servitude? - 11/6/2010 9:32:50 AM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline 		Silly me, I used to just date people to see if we were compatible.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to Malkinius)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Application for Servitude? - 11/6/2010 12:07:06 PM   
Kaliko


Posts: 3381
Joined: 9/25/2010
Status: offline 		I filled out a questionnaire once. That particular man turned out to be nothing more than a puff of smoke. But sure, I would do it again. I like questionnaires, surveys, analysis, etc...I think it's fun.

(in reply to Rexeena)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Application for Servitude? - 11/6/2010 12:08:24 PM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		He may have a paperwork fetish, or perhaps he is a fan of formalized relationships.  Or maybe his mentor taught him about the importance of applications.  In my opinion, the best way to learn about someone is to get to know him/her over a period of time and under varying circumstances, it all can't happen on an application.

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to Rexeena)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Application for Servitude? - 11/6/2010 12:20:42 PM   
MIsabelah


Posts: 57
Joined: 9/7/2010
Status: offline 		Long long time ago I used an application. But...I don't now. Now I only use a thorough BDSM checklist that gets deep, dirty, and gritty. It give me a complete idea of what is going on in the person's head about the lifestyle. But I would only use this checklist after the first meet & greet was successful.

(in reply to KatyLied)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Application for Servitude? - 11/6/2010 12:51:09 PM   
Scheherazade


Posts: 41
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen1968

I'd send it back to him and tell him thanks but no thanks.
It's not a job interview to me.
You'll learn far more about each other over a 20 minute cup of coffee without ever discussing kink.

Yes, but almost always must survive your own mental checklist to even get that coffee.

(in reply to Aileen1968)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Application for Servitude? - 11/6/2010 2:00:54 PM   
jujubeeMB


Posts: 723
Joined: 1/8/2010
Status: offline 		Slave applications crack me up, especially with straight female slaves. Yes, obviously once the dynamic is in place, the slave is the one doing the serving/pleasing/obeying and general catering to the Dom/Master. However, until the dynamic gets into place, the slave has just as much deciding power as the Dom, and frankly a little bit more, because there is such a high demand for straight female subs/slaves. If my Dom had handed me an application to fill out for his consideration, I would have laughed at him. Fortunately for me, instead of geeking out in fantasyland, he spent his time and energy seducing me

(in reply to Scheherazade)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Application for Servitude? - 11/6/2010 3:20:01 PM   
CeriseNin


Posts: 286
Joined: 4/8/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Rexeena

Hello!
I'd like to know how common these are. I'm currently considering a Master in my city, and he emailed me one. It seems more as a survey to see some of my thoughts/overall experience, etc. since he isn't considering other subs at the moment. Of course, it's all tentative at this point, as we have yet to meet in person. Has anybody completed one of these apps or had a sub complete one?


I appreciate any relevant responses. Thanks!






No and I consider questionnaires a deal breaker. Either date me and get to know me via time spent together and verbal communication, or find someone else.

(in reply to Rexeena)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Application for Servitude? - 11/6/2010 4:33:17 PM   
lally2


Posts: 2621
Joined: 4/16/2009
Status: offline 		it all seems a bit clinical to me and dare i say, slightly insecure of the Dom to need to know in so much detail what they can and cant do with a person.  trying to decipher compatibility through paperwork is just taking the entire cyber experience a tad too far!

ive never filled in a questionaire and i started at the start like everyone else, not knowing a damn thing about BDSM and what i liked and disliked.  guys came along and i discovered that i loved certain things and hated others but in the end it didnt matter because what they wanted to do in the end was on the agenda whether i liked it or not. 

part of the fun of a new person is learning all about them layer by layer IMO

_____________________________

So all I have to do in order to serve him, is to work out exactly how improbable he is, feed that figure into the finite improbability generator, give him a fresh cup of really hot tea ... and turn him on!

(in reply to CeriseNin)
Profile   Post #: 30
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