RE: Financial Considerations in Choosing to Submit (Full Version)

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NakedSenses -> RE: Financial Considerations in Choosing to Submit (11/18/2010 1:26:36 AM)

I'm sorry to disappoint you but my self esteem is very much intact and quite secure. I base my opinions and my decisions on observations and reasoning. Sometimes they lead to conclusions that may not be popular or highly regarded but they do fit the facts and the explanation holds up to Occam's Razor. Economic behavior is amoral, but the "dismal science" the solid. It's just human nature; it's nothing personal, you know.

My ploy also acts as a filter. My last relationship ended six months ago after two years. She was sixteen years my junior and her annual income was in six figures (TEN TIMES MINE & MORE). She wasn't the first, either. For some reason, female executives and corporate managers like me a lot. Maybe it's because I don't want their money, or if they give me gifts I return the favor, despite my paltry income. Or maybe I'm sensitive to their special needs. They play the game at work for real millions of dollars, and for keeps. That's stressful stuff every day, particularly when you have to discharge someone and they'll probably end up homeless in this economy. If I had wanted a meal ticket, believe me, I could have had two of them in two years. Probably could have married them if I didn't have these damn morals and ethics issues getting in the way. The only woman I ever did marry, and who is the mother of my child, works with the very sickest of kids at a world-famous institution. Many nights I'd help her to "decompress" after another child died at work that day. I really admired her strength, because few people can handle a job like that, but someone has to do it.

By the way, you failed to mention the poignant remark that is the rejoinder to the "Yo- I'm a loser" opening. In short, you conveniently left out the rest of the story in order to make your point. The omission of pertinent information can be very helpful at times.
Less is more, eh?




crazyml -> RE: Financial Considerations in Choosing to Submit (11/18/2010 4:04:03 AM)

Surely the financial status of a prospective partner has to be a consideration, especially if you're considering a serious ltr?

You may as well say "I’m well aware that a submissive is entitled to choose a man on the basis of his looks. It is just when this is done under the guise of submission, that it renders the D/s dynamic to a shallow appearance oriented transaction."

I'm sure there are some "gold digger" subs out there (just as there are in nilla land), just as there are plenty of shallow appearance focussed types too.

Personally, someone's financial status is relevant, just as their looks are, their outlook on life, even their politics. None of these are supremely important, although at the boundaries each one may represent a "hard limit" for me. For example, I wouldn't date someone who needed me to pay for everything, and I wouldn't date a Tory.



Lockit -> RE: Financial Considerations in Choosing to Submit (11/18/2010 2:14:49 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: NakedSenses

I'm sorry to disappoint you but my self esteem is very much intact and quite secure. I base my opinions and my decisions on observations and reasoning. Sometimes they lead to conclusions that may not be popular or highly regarded but they do fit the facts and the explanation holds up to Occam's Razor. Economic behavior is amoral, but the "dismal science" the solid. It's just human nature; it's nothing personal, you know.

My ploy also acts as a filter. My last relationship ended six months ago after two years. She was sixteen years my junior and her annual income was in six figures (TEN TIMES MINE & MORE). She wasn't the first, either. For some reason, female executives and corporate managers like me a lot. Maybe it's because I don't want their money, or if they give me gifts I return the favor, despite my paltry income. Or maybe I'm sensitive to their special needs. They play the game at work for real millions of dollars, and for keeps. That's stressful stuff every day, particularly when you have to discharge someone and they'll probably end up homeless in this economy. If I had wanted a meal ticket, believe me, I could have had two of them in two years. Probably could have married them if I didn't have these damn morals and ethics issues getting in the way. The only woman I ever did marry, and who is the mother of my child, works with the very sickest of kids at a world-famous institution. Many nights I'd help her to "decompress" after another child died at work that day. I really admired her strength, because few people can handle a job like that, but someone has to do it.

By the way, you failed to mention the poignant remark that is the rejoinder to the "Yo- I'm a loser" opening. In short, you conveniently left out the rest of the story in order to make your point. The omission of pertinent information can be very helpful at times.
Less is more, eh?




Okay, color me clueless here. My post was all about working through a challenging situation and coming out on top of it with humor. If I left anything out, that is because I am not writing a book on it... but just wanted to present a way to look at things when people might say something like Yo... financial loser or Jerry Springer type here. I am totally lost here because one moment I am leaving something out and the next, less is more! lol

I saw your complete post... it was someone else that commented on part of your post and I elaborated. lol

Wish to clue me in? lol (My head hurts from the spin... where the hell is my guy with hot and strong coffee?!)



UmbraDomina -> RE: Financial Considerations in Choosing to Submit (11/18/2010 8:06:43 PM)

it's kinda funny....... in a sad way....... I just adviced my former slave (we are still close friends) to tell female dominants he was dating to start with that he was pretty much broke, and this would help sort out the money hungry ones from those seeking out a relationship with him. Oddly enough it has worked well. He suspected one or two ladies of being more interested in his wallet then him, and told them he was broke.............. amazing how they suddenly remembered they had something they had to do, and had to leave the date, and by the time he got home he had a "dear subbie" email waiting for him.

Some people are money grubbers, it doesn't take much to sort them out.

Clearly almost everyone wants their partner to be able to take care of themselves or at least have a job, and ablity to put forth some effort. A few still want a trophy sub (male or female) and hey more power to them, if they can afford it, they generally get what they pay for.



FriendlyMuppet -> RE: Financial Considerations in Choosing to Submit (11/18/2010 8:11:20 PM)

I'm financially stable and doing just fine. But whenever I come across a potential partner who is obsessed with money, I run the other direction.

Money is one of those things I detest as a focus. I work a job that pays me well so I can survive comfortably. That's all it means to me. I understand there are those who are so focused on it that they can think of nothing else. Hopefully, they find the people they're looking for because it's so annoying to be involved with them myself.



Br33dMast3r -> RE: Financial Considerations in Choosing to Submit (11/18/2010 9:17:49 PM)

This is an excellent reply and I'm glad to see so many people grasp the fact that the man is not his wallet.

OF COURSE, some relationships are built upon a certain spending level. The end of that level may spell the end of the relationship. It happens all too often. However, I think it's a mistake. Life is a dynamic, not static. Things change. A perfectly competent Dom may have a retirement fund pilfered, a corporation fold, and so on. I lost all my GM stock. Fortunately I have other things. It's not a black and white world.

Many men will rebuild their wealth, and doubly so. Once bitten, twice shy, as the saying goes. This applies to business not just biting. ;) A man who has lost a thing will be much more proactive and cautious upon regaining that thing.

MANY women want money. FEW women will work hard towards getting it. Fewer still work with the man to aid his empire and efforts. Those few are the happy ones. I know six millionaires. How many do you know? How many of them earned it? Five of the millionaires that I know have lost everything once before. They were able to come back. The sixth, she inherited and not only never lost anything but never earned it.

.02.




slave2k -> RE: Financial Considerations in Choosing to Submit (11/18/2010 9:56:55 PM)

Well, I happen to know two millionaires
and used to love one of them, but She
turned out to be a very cruel Financial
Domme asking me for money in several
tricky ways, even though
I spotted her every move and finally told her
I wasn't into Financial Domination. She had
always treated me like dirt and found no trouble
in denying me for good. The other is kinder,
but since I got my heart broken by the first,
I am now more careful in my Relationships and
building my own wealth (a little hard but doing it)
in order to let the Ladies know that I'm Real
(Plus I don't want my heart broken again).
I've found that it's easier for Ladies to make
the money and get rich than it is for guys.
It won't be a surprise to find more rich Ladies
soon but I wish they wouldn't be so cruel.
I often emphasize LOVE instead of money
because that's my true nature but Ladies are
now way too materialistic and shallow.
I've yet to find one that has truly befriended me
for the sake of me and not for how much I have.
Too bad for you Ladies. I support Fem Supremacy
and sadly see that if this is the way
You want it, well, it won't spread worldwide
any soon. Financial Dommes are often forgetful
that there's poor Ladies out there that truly need
support. Dommes selfishly want all the money
for Themselves. One even told me that She had
slaves Worship Her with their money. This is
sick and sometimes creates Addiction. I often
call Fin Dommes "High-Class Scammers" since
I happen to know some of their dirty tricks.
Hope this helps. Guys, Do yourselves a favor
and AVOID THEM! There are others that truly
believe in S/M and won't charge You anything.
Better yet, Make A Donation to Verified Charities
such as PETA.ORG and others. This alone will make
you feel great!



LadyConstanze -> RE: Financial Considerations in Choosing to Submit (11/19/2010 4:02:20 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Br33dMast3r


MANY women want money. FEW women will work hard towards getting it. Fewer still work with the man to aid his empire and efforts. Those few are the happy ones. I know six millionaires. How many do you know? How many of them earned it? Five of the millionaires that I know have lost everything once before. They were able to come back. The sixth, she inherited and not only never lost anything but never earned it.

.02.





Isn't it great that just women want money and never men? As for how many millionaires I know, I don't really count them, seems a bit gauche to ask your friends about their financial situation, don't you think? I can guess from size and number of houses, cars, businesses, the family backgrounds, but again, I consider that their business and not mine and I'm not friends with them due to their financial assets but because we went to school or uni together, worked together or met somewhere along the way. I don't tend to pick my friends according to bank accounts but according to how we interact and how they treat others - you can always tell a lot more about a person if you watch how they treat others they don't need or who are not of any advantage to them. I prefer a decent person, their financial background doesn't matter. Instead of obsessing if I know enough rich people, I rather focus on having a healthy financial situation.

How Victorian of you to assume that men are always the ones who earn big, there are quite a few couples where the woman earns more than the guy or has a more successful business, luckily those women don't drop the guys. I don't have young ones, but if I had (heaven forbid), I would have no problem if my partner would stay at home to look after them and I earn the money. Because I consider raising children a rather valuable contribution to a relationship.



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