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HardUse4You -> RE: What it's not about. (12/21/2010 9:33:28 AM)
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I'm not a regular patron of forums anywhere, and while I agree in totality that the OP is a mindless fop, I have to play "Devil's advocate" here for one reason: because there are far, far too many people I've watched on these boards over almost the last year who's perspectives on the "Lifestyle" are as ignorant as the fool who started this topic.
The guy might come-off like a limp-dick troglodyte, but there are just as many others here equally as ignorant in their attitudes who need to get a grip, as too many "in the Lifestyle".
No, I'm not him, no I don't fucking know him, nor do I care about or anyone else, but there's so much bullshit on these forums, on this site and in the Lifestyle in general, I've basically just had it, and am going to vent about it because, fuck it, it's a "free world", right?
Example: quote:
This sounds like grandstanding. Who are You addressing? All the fakes and pretenders on the forums? You've made, what, five posts? You're hardly an expert yet.
What the fuck does his post count have to do anything? You could have 100k posts on these forums and not be an "expert", not that there is such a thing as an "expert", being a relative fucking term.
Example: quote:
There are people here who have been doing this for decades and are extremely accomplished and well respected in their communities.
Alright, this was the last straw for me, regarding all the bullshit I've seen spewed around here for far too long.
The word "accomplished" is immensely fucking relative, and means absolutely nothing.
Who's "accomplished" and what's made them so? Who makes that judgment? The idiot "purists" who believe there's the "right ways" in regards to BDSM and the Lifestyle? Who have the ability to make that judgment, simple due to the fact they can tie every fucking knot in the world and give commands in some "scene" using particular words?
The fucking egos of those who follow this Holier-than-thou bullshit due to believing themselves to do things "the right way" are unbelievable.
"Grandstanding" would be such assholes who believe themselves "accomplished" because they've been "in the Lifestyle" tying knots, giving commands and whipping people/or submitting and sucking cock at the whim of another, none of which amounts to shit.
Truth is, while for many BDSM and the Lifestyle can involve a lot of roleplay, that most people are just playing a role within the roleplay, and are completely fucking full of shit.
I'll tell you what else I'm fucking tired of with the plethora of fake fucks around here: all the over-sensitive fucking "romanticizing" of BDSM/the Lifestyle. There are far too many practically, if not outright, stating that there "should" always be love involved and mutual respect in a way that's way to akin to what would be involved in a "vanilla" relationship. Absolutely asinine, given that you're talking about a Lifestyle in which "Slavery" is involved, and people want to be used, abused and put into the service of another.
Contradictions in attitudes abound in this fucking place, and perspectives among far too many anywhere are far too skewed.
Sure, there's trust that should always exist between a Master and Slave, and that even love can develop, but unless you're just a "bedroom BDSM'er", too many here, as fucking "experienced" as they believe themselves to be, are full of shit, continually contradicting themselves in what is, by nature, already a contradictory lifestyle.
You "can" be in-love with someone with whom you're sharing the Lifestyle, but the Lifestyle has nothing to fucking do with "love", or "cuddling aftercare"... awww, such a sweet concept... just go back to your vanilla life if you want to be fucking cuddled, or your roleplaying "scenes" bullshit, and stop claiming to be "experts" in the "Lifestyle", as word which would indicate it's something you LIVE, not just "play-out".
You want to be "Slave", but you want to have rights? You want someone to "give a fuck" what you think? Sure, a Master should "care" what their Slave thinks, to a degree, but the entire point of being "Slave" is to have your decisions made for you, and have "no rights" but what the Master sees fit.
There is no "right way" or "one way" in the Lifestyle, in terms of who desires what, their methodology or how they go about anything, period.
There's no love to be "expected" that need be involved.
No, it's not just "about sex", unless you want it to be, and many DO live it as a lifestyle, 24/7.
Yes, it's much "about sex", as it's a lifestyle that revolves around the erotic.
quote:
I would suggest everyone who thinks they are into BDSM actually take the time to look up each of the words BONDAGE - DISCIPLINE/DOMINATION (<--- there are 2 schools of thought) - SADISM - MASOCHISM. Then be honest with yourself. Words mean things. There is a reason for these words to exist in our language. If you've never physically bound & abused another human being (and enjoyed it), you're neither a dom nor a sadist. If you've never given yourself into the control of another for the express purpose of being bound & abused (and enjoyed it) you're neither a sub nor a masochist. Furthermore, if you have a laundry list of things you won't do, or allow to be done to you, that takes longer to read than War & Peace, you're NOT a sub. A sub doesn't get to decide very much at all. Entering an arrangement with more than a few reasonable boundaries is NOT submission. Allowing for more than a few reasonable considerations is NOT dominance.
He's right on this, in what he's trying to get across.
quote:
BDSM is not a lifestyle. While it can, & often does carry over into the mundane, everyday life of those few who practice it, BDSM is 1st, & foremost, a sexual proclivity.
He's a little off on this... the "sexual proclivity" becomes a lifestyle, along with all else involved. BDSM can indeed be, and is for some (though I don't think as many here as who proclaim) a true Lifestyle.
Actually, I agree with much of what he said, though he's a coward and backing-off from his opinions now. I think it's definitely way to linear in perspective, but most of the "basics" he got across, if you think about where it's coming from, make sense... unless you're a "treat me like a whore, but love me like your wife/husband" or "I want no rights, but want the right to have rights" idiot, in which case, you're not going to understand shit.
quote:
ORIGINAL: sexyred1
Methinks he doth protest too much.
For the love of fuck... seriously? The "doth protest too much" line? Any idea how fucking ridiculous people sound with that over-used, pretentious bullshit? You should be embarrassed. I'm from Jersey/NY myself, and though can be as verbose and articulate as the most "accomplished" speakers and writers, would never be caught spewing that cliche line, in attempts at sounding... what... "witty"? Christ.
I could quote Latin phrases until your fucking head exploded. Just because I "swear" a lot when I'm irritated, does not mean I'm not highly intelligent or articulate. Just means there are times it's not worth the effort, such as with too many of the fools here.
Go ahead... slam the fool OP for starting this thread... as well as me. Unlike him, I actually wont respond, because I know what I've said will strike the nerves of the TRULY self-serving individuals here, pretending to be "oh so dedicated and experienced" in the Lifestyle, with their relative opinions and touchy-feely and/or there's "the right ways to do things in the Lifestyle", bullshit.
I love women... their energy, their sexuality, every inch and curve... and I've a great respect for women (violently protective, actually). I hate men, with all their "chest-puffing" bullshit, and I've fucked-up more than my share of "tough-guys" twice my size over the years. So nothing here has to do with sex, and I'd be glad to stand right in the fucking face of anyone here, personally, and make these same statements. You've no idea who the fuck I am.
So, when I tell "you" that I truly don't give a fuck about your responses, I mean it.
When I "judge" the fools here who judge everyone else, and come-off with their pretentious attitudes that just fucking ooze "Oh, I go to dungeon parties and learned to be a Master/Slave from the grand-fucking-pooba of BDSM, to I'm an accomplished expert", I truly stand fucking behind it.
Too many in the "scene" have fucked perspectives of Masterdom and Slavery, BDSM, control, and all else involved in the Lifestyle and since ignorance makes me fucking violent, I simply had to fucking vent, because this site is full of people who just ooze ignorance and contradictory thinking, they themselves making unprovable statements and biased, linear judgments, and it's just simply fucking ridiculous.
Off with smiles now, because I couldn't give a tossed-fuck about the responses to this.
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