anyone with similar experiences? (Full Version)

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derfman -> anyone with similar experiences? (12/22/2010 10:03:40 AM)

Hi i am a rather newbie sub.  I have been corresponding by chat with a dom/master across country.  He has started asking me to send compromising pictures of myself some of which include my face.  He has also asked my to provide my ID stats - name address, phone number, etc.  I have not provided the stats info yet.  He says he has no illegal or malicious intent, asking for these things just to establish control.  I do not want to malign the guy by name in case he is speaking the truth.  But warning bells are going off in my head about the potential for blackmailing me.  Interested to hear if anyone else has had similar experiences.  Thanks
derfman




mnottertail -> RE: anyone with similar experiences? (12/22/2010 10:09:14 AM)

I do not think it improper to establish EACH OTHERS bonafides.

Seems to me maybe you all should start with just swapping phone numbers. Call each other and sort of work into the next step.

I can go to a phone book or the courthouse and gain information on people, but that is hardly estabilishing control to know gnarleyglendas boob size or whether cocklickercalvin is cut or not and has a social security number.




kalikshama -> RE: anyone with similar experiences? (12/22/2010 10:16:03 AM)

I never give out my address until I've had the vanilla meeting. I don't see why he needs yours, being long distance. You can get a google phone number. There was another thread about this.

I often send compromising pics unasked, or if asked nicely, but never if someone is being pushy.

Trust your gut.




YoungBlondeSlave -> RE: anyone with similar experiences? (12/22/2010 10:17:13 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: derfman

Hi i am a rather newbie sub.  I have been corresponding by chat with a dom/master across country.  He has started asking me to send compromising pictures of myself some of which include my face.  He has also asked my to provide my ID stats - name address, phone number, etc.  I have not provided the stats info yet.  He says he has no illegal or malicious intent, asking for these things just to establish control.  I do not want to malign the guy by name in case he is speaking the truth.  But warning bells are going off in my head about the potential for blackmailing me.  Interested to hear if anyone else has had similar experiences.  Thanks
derfman


Listen to those warning bells, i'm betting they're spot on.

Just because he *says* he has no malicious/illegal intent doesn't mean much of anything. He could very well be full of shit. Start with a phone call first if you really want to continue, then see what sort of warning bells are going off or, if they still are.

Try going to munches and different things like that to meet someone. They're much more likely to be on the up and up and you'll be able to feel them out better if you see them in real life. Many people on the boards here are from your area and they might very well be able to help you out much better than i can.

i wish you the best.




Twoshoes -> RE: anyone with similar experiences? (12/22/2010 10:39:04 AM)

Don't bother. Anyone who plans on actually dominating you will be more focused on what they'll do to you when they have you, not on how comparatively little one gets out of making someone take compromising pictures of themselves without meeting them.




windchymes -> RE: anyone with similar experiences? (12/22/2010 11:40:50 AM)

Ask not for whom the warning bells toll, they toll for thee.




sexyred1 -> RE: anyone with similar experiences? (12/22/2010 11:43:38 AM)

Why do people ask such obvious questions?? Without meeting someone and establishing some sort of relationship, why would you ever send compromising photos and personal data.

People prey on the desperate and this smacks of that.




Michael75 -> RE: anyone with similar experiences? (12/22/2010 11:48:16 AM)

Be very careful.




Focus50 -> RE: anyone with similar experiences? (12/22/2010 11:51:38 AM)

I'm always telling people to trust their own instincts....

If this fella doesn't feel right to you then what more do you need to know to react accordingly?

Focus.




DCWoody -> RE: anyone with similar experiences? (12/22/2010 11:57:53 AM)

I have had long distance subs give me physical addresses before now....but generally not without having known them a while, and for sending packages, not 'establishing control'. But I ain't him.....An compromising photos/vids doesn't really need an explanation IMO :D :p

It does sound a little off, but I'd suggest going with mnottertails advice.





derfman -> RE: anyone with similar experiences? (12/22/2010 12:21:35 PM)

thank you all for your thoughtful replies so far.  all our correspondence so far has been chat and e-mail, towards establishing a real time meet in the near future.  from all your advice, maybe slowing down and talking on the phone is indeed a sound next step




LadyPact -> RE: anyone with similar experiences? (12/22/2010 1:52:23 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1

Why do people ask such obvious questions?? Without meeting someone and establishing some sort of relationship, why would you ever send compromising photos and personal data.

People prey on the desperate and this smacks of that.

I love you, red.  I really do.  I wish that more people on this planet had your kind of common sense.




sexyred1 -> RE: anyone with similar experiences? (12/22/2010 1:55:31 PM)

I love you too, LadyPact. :)

I just think some things do not need to be asked, but I do understand that some people want and need validation of their thoughts and actions.




crazyml -> RE: anyone with similar experiences? (12/22/2010 2:19:11 PM)

Hey there,

I think you're making the right call. Talk on the phone - exchange numbers, and when the time comes , my advice would be to exchange addresses - note the "exchange" you get his digits, he gets yours.

Your instincts seem pretty good - trust them!

And I hope you have a great time!




agirl -> RE: anyone with similar experiences? (12/22/2010 2:30:18 PM)

If someone asks for my info, I'm less likely to give it.

agirl




soul2share -> RE: anyone with similar experiences? (12/22/2010 7:01:27 PM)

DON'T DO IT!!!!!! Listen to those gut feelings....he doesn't need to know your personal info......and in these days of identity theft, (victim myself here), you don't need to be giving out info to strangers.

And I shouldn't have to say anything about compromising pics......you want to get outed?  Piss him off and that's exactly what'll happen!

Slow down, STOP and think, and don't let the sub frenzy thing take over your smarts.  Talk on the phone, see what goes on from there.  TRUST YOUR FEELINGS....I can't say that enough!




soul2share -> RE: anyone with similar experiences? (12/22/2010 7:03:07 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact
quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1
Why do people ask such obvious questions?? Without meeting someone and establishing some sort of relationship, why would you ever send compromising photos and personal data.
People prey on the desperate and this smacks of that.

I love you, red.  I really do.  I wish that more people on this planet had your kind of common sense.


but, but, but......where would we get our fun then?   [:)]
And I lubs ya both! 




MasterFireMaam -> RE: anyone with similar experiences? (12/22/2010 7:24:16 PM)

If this were a vanilla relationship developing, would you do it? Just because we're kinky doesn't mean good sense is thrown out the window. Go with your gut.

Master Fire




sunshinemiss -> RE: anyone with similar experiences? (12/23/2010 4:23:06 AM)

Dreadfully obvious thread hijack.... oh I'm a naughty girl.

MFM's new foto:

!!!!!

:: thud ::

that is all.
/ end hijack




oldbabyface -> RE: anyone with similar experiences? (12/23/2010 9:34:20 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50

I'm always telling people to trust their own instincts....

If it don't feel right it ain't.

A few times I've ignored this sort of advice and now regrets make me smarter.




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