Ignoring Political Limits?

Ignoring Political Limits? (Full Version)

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ladychatterley -> Ignoring Political Limits? (4/30/2006 4:53:40 PM)
Is there a reason that some doms seem to not respect a potential sub's political views, even when it is listed as a “lives for” and the other side as a “hard limit?” I’ve had men offer me eletro-shock therapy, counseling and a variety of other ways to get over my liberal views. It seems to me that some want to punish me for disagreeing with them. And it isn’t just one or two men—it seems to me that every neo-conservative BDSMer (which I would have thought was a contradiction in terms, given that the neo-cons seem to be scapegoating us to try to win elections) has approached me about ‘curing’ me of my political views. My profile is as obvious as I’m capable of being that I’m liberal and only want to go out with liberals. I have two “lives for” checked—political activism and liberal politics and one “hard limit” which is conservative politics. And I talk about it, probably incessantly. And yet, Republican after Republican... I ended up on a date recently with a guy who spends the first 30 minutes lecturing me on why global warming isn’t happening, then goes into a tirade on Paul Krugman (who is the 2nd thing I mention in my profile as something I like), then takes off his jacket and is wearing a T-shirt with a certain Danish cartoon on it!!!! And it was pretty clear that he went and bought this t-shirt for my benefit (he admitted he’d never worn it before) and yet he still expected me to submit to him that evening! I have a sense that if I said “I have a huge limit with anal play” people wouldn’t be so in-your-face about telling me why they would not respect that limit. I don't understand why this issue, which to me is an issue of integrity and morality, is totally ignored.

LaTigresse -> RE: Ignoring Political Limits? (4/30/2006 5:02:34 PM)
Any dominant that cannot respect a hard limit is not a true dominant in my personal opinion. As far as politics, I don't understand why so many (especially men it seems) feel the need to convert the rest of the world to their way of thinking because if THEY think it, it just has to be the RIGHT and ONLY way! I respect someone alot more and would be much MUCH more inclined to at least listen to their point of view if they would just act like a grown up and respectfully agree to disagree instead of condesending to everything that does not think exactly as they do. And yes, from my experience, it appears that republicans are the worst offenders.

juliaoceania -> RE: Ignoring Political Limits? (4/30/2006 5:09:56 PM)
I am a liberal submissive and I also have listed it the way you have on my profile. I am sorry that there are some that are not respecting that. I have found when conservatives contact me it is because they failed to read my profile or they really do not care all that much about politics. I just email back that I do not date conservatives and that has always been the end of story,.... good luck finding what you are looking for.

WeeIttyBitty -> RE: Ignoring Political Limits? (4/30/2006 5:12:44 PM)
Ironic to see this the day after John Kennith Galbraith has died. May modern liberalism quickly follow him. Modern liberalism is a bankrupt ideology who's usefulness has long past. (like trade unions) The sooner that modern liberalism is discarded, the sooner the economic wreckage these misguided fools have caused can be repaired. For some people its a crusade, to vanquish the evil & corrupt liberals, and they view their entire life thru a political prisms.

Clothespingirl -> RE: Ignoring Political Limits? (4/30/2006 5:14:49 PM)
My guess is, they look at your profile and when they see the words "40D" and "wild, kinky sex", all the other text is converted into a "blah, blah" sound like in a Charlie Brown cartoon. [;)] Seriously, I gather a lot of dominant men want to overcome a woman's resistance and mold her to what they want. Which is sexy up to a point, but trying to change someone's basic personality is just a recipe for disaster. Nobody has a penis mighty enough to make me forget my moral beliefs (and if I thought someone did, I'd stay away from him!)

Reasonable -> RE: Ignoring Political Limits? (4/30/2006 5:18:40 PM)
I've never understood either liberals or conservatives. Neither system works efficiently. I wish we had a good moderate party, that could just take the good aspects of both-and toss out the side agenda groups that now pervade them. I could definitley support that. Politics to support the intersts of the common man-what an unusual idea..

nikaa -> RE: Ignoring Political Limits? (4/30/2006 5:19:21 PM)
Would that be penis envy if they did? Nika{Phoenix}

juliaoceania -> RE: Ignoring Political Limits? (4/30/2006 5:26:55 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Reasonable I've never understood either liberals or conservatives. Neither system works efficiently. I wish we had a good moderate party, that could just take the good aspects of both-and toss out the side agenda groups that now pervade them. I could definitley support that. Politics to support the intersts of the common man-what an unusual idea.. Personally I wish we had more than one party, I am not a Democrat, Republican, Libertarian, or Green Party member.. I am just on the liberal side of things and do not have sex with conservatives... lol (and I am guessing they do nt wanna have sex with me...smiles)

ScooterTrash -> RE: Ignoring Political Limits? (4/30/2006 5:29:31 PM)
I have a difficult time understanding "politics" being a limit at all. I am fairly open about asking or volunteering info about hobbies, interests, general likes and dislikes, etc., but would never ever consider bringing up politics or religion for that matter. I think these are very individual things and they should obviously be respected...but a limit? Don't take this wrong, I am certainly not poking fun at it as it's obvious it is a serious issue to some, but I regard limits as something more along the line of something physical, not an ideal that is regarded more as a belief.

Level -> RE: Ignoring Political Limits? (4/30/2006 5:30:46 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ladychatterley Is there a reason that some doms seem to not respect a potential sub's political views, even when it is listed as a “lives for” and the other side as a “hard limit?” I’ve had men offer me eletro-shock therapy, counseling and a variety of other ways to get over my liberal views. It seems to me that some want to punish me for disagreeing with them. And it isn’t just one or two men—it seems to me that every neo-conservative BDSMer (which I would have thought was a contradiction in terms, given that the neo-cons seem to be scapegoating us to try to win elections) has approached me about ‘curing’ me of my political views. My profile is as obvious as I’m capable of being that I’m liberal and only want to go out with liberals. I have two “lives for” checked—political activism and liberal politics and one “hard limit” which is conservative politics. And I talk about it, probably incessantly. And yet, Republican after Republican... I ended up on a date recently with a guy who spends the first 30 minutes lecturing me on why global warming isn’t happening, then goes into a tirade on Paul Krugman (who is the 2nd thing I mention in my profile as something I like), then takes off his jacket and is wearing a T-shirt with a certain Danish cartoon on it!!!! And it was pretty clear that he went and bought this t-shirt for my benefit (he admitted he’d never worn it before) and yet he still expected me to submit to him that evening! I have a sense that if I said “I have a huge limit with anal play” people wouldn’t be so in-your-face about telling me why they would not respect that limit. I don't understand why this issue, which to me is an issue of integrity and morality, is totally ignored. Idiots are idiots, whether conservative or liberal. Personally, if I was out with someone who was going out of their way to disrespect me, I wouldn't have been there for 30 minutes. As an aside....... if you're a fan of liberal economists, did you know that John Kenneth Galbraith passed away today? He has provided me with hours of pleasurable reading, and caused me to think.... I often disagreed with his views, but always had respect for him.

Chiana -> RE: Ignoring Political Limits? (4/30/2006 5:32:32 PM)
as to why it would be a limit.. i personally state in my profile (when i had it up) that 'neo-cons need not apply'. this was put there SPECIFICALLY because i want a Dom who can think logically

Clothespingirl -> RE: Ignoring Political Limits? (4/30/2006 5:32:33 PM)
Well, Scooter, you obviously don't have a deep fear of finding yourself chained to the wall, gagged, with Fox News on... Ahhhhhh!

Level -> RE: Ignoring Political Limits? (4/30/2006 5:33:31 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Clothespingirl My guess is, they look at your profile and when they see the words "40D" and "wild, kinky sex", all the other text is converted into a "blah, blah" sound like in a Charlie Brown cartoon. [;)] Seriously, I gather a lot of dominant men want to overcome a woman's resistance and mold her to what they want. Which is sexy up to a point, but trying to change someone's basic personality is just a recipe for disaster. Nobody has a penis mighty enough to make me forget my moral beliefs (and if I thought someone did, I'd stay away from him!) LMAO...... a great post!

nikaa -> RE: Ignoring Political Limits? (4/30/2006 5:34:27 PM)
Politics as a hard limit or limit at all? I'm sorry I don't understand this. If someone considers politics a hard limit what is next religion. Granted I know many people who will not marry outside their religion, however; I am not sure if I consider that the same as a hard limit. Do dominates really want to control how a submissive/slave votes politically or what religion they practice? Curiously Nika{Phoenix}

juliaoceania -> RE: Ignoring Political Limits? (4/30/2006 5:35:21 PM)
Scooter, For people that political philosophy is not important to it would not be an issue, but for someone whose power is in the hands of someone else their values and religious beliefs could be impacted by a dominant they are serving. If I was serving a dominant in the armed forces that was serving in Iraq or had done so it might be hard for him to understand my peace movement activities for example. This is the inner core of who I am. If I could not share my beliefs with them it would leave a huge gap for me in the relationship.. It is always so much yummier when you are aligned on things such as morals, beliefs, and values. It leads to common ground for trust IMO.

knotnilla -> RE: Ignoring Political Limits? (4/30/2006 5:40:42 PM)
quote: I’ve had men offer me eletro-shock therapy, counseling and a variety of other ways to get over my liberal views. You should thank them politely and take them up on their kind offers! Unless you are in your twenties... if you are you will grow out of it eventually. [;)]

ScooterTrash -> RE: Ignoring Political Limits? (4/30/2006 5:43:07 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Chiana as to why it would be a limit.. i personally state in my profile (when i had it up) that 'neo-cons need not apply'. this was put there SPECIFICALLY because i want a Dom who can think logically Hmmm, sounds kind of judgemental to me based on preconceived notions....but to each their own. I was under the belief that politics and logic were mutually exclusive topics anyway...lol. I don't ever recall ever asking about someone's political views, so I guess it's not that big of a deal to me.

obis -> RE: Ignoring Political Limits? (4/30/2006 5:43:24 PM)
I would guess it is a combination of: People who think any submissive will eventually surrender her beliefs to those of the master anyways, so it doesn't matter Guys who are so ignorant about major issues that they think they have a single solution to them all, yet don't realize that everyone else thinks they're a blowhard ignoramus because they spout their views at any opportunity, even when it isn't appropriate or asked for (see earlier posts in this thread for an example) Fortunately, both problems are easy to recognize and avoid for those interested in long-term relationships. There are tragically few shortcuts for people who have unusual priorities, be they political activism (left or right) or sports fanaticism. Everyone else assumes they are the exception to that one critical requirement because they are so wonderful.

WyrdRich -> RE: Ignoring Political Limits? (4/30/2006 6:10:09 PM)
Political intolerance of any stripe is a red flag for me. It tells me what kind of person I'm dealing with very quickly. I don't consider them worth having in my life. There is a long tradition of happily married couples driving to the polls together for the express purpose of cancelling each others votes. Get over yourselves.

ladychatterley -> RE: Ignoring Political Limits? (4/30/2006 6:25:30 PM)
Several things: If you don’t understand why someone has something as a hard limit, I would assume you would ask. You would not take her out, in public, and humiliate her by wearing a t-shirt with a Danish cartoon on it, forcing her to pick between being polite (which I ALWAYS try to do on a date—I would have loved to have ditched him, Level, but I didn’t know how to do it in a gracious way) and not being humiliated. Fortunately, I don’t think anyone from work saw me with his t-shirt, but since I work with quite a few Muslim people, I really was uncomfortable with that cartoon. But, if you are curious as to why it is a hard limit for me: I believe that subs are shaped by their Doms quite a bit. With the exception of things that I think are morally wrong (animals, minors), if it were really important to my partner, I’d try to get over a limit about bodily waste or blood. It might take a while, but I would try to get over it if it were important to him. But I really truly believe my country and our world is being destroyed and talk about invading Iran doesn’t make me sleep easier. I don’t know whether I’m more scared about the trade deficit, war, or global warming, but these issues are absolutely integral to who I am. I wasn’t this strident before Bush, but I believe, truly and in my heart of hearts, that we have a very limited time to save this country from turning into V is for Vendetta land or being destroyed by global warming. We in the ‘reality based’ community have to fight merely to try and deal intelligently with reality because when it is ignored horrible things (like Katrina and Iraq) happen. One out of five Americans believe the sun revolves around the earth, and almost half of Americans believe in the rapture! Who cares what we do to the earth or the environment if we are going to have Jesus’ second coming? But for those of us who thing that if Jesus comes, it will be on his timeframe, not ours, and we have a responsibility to leave an earth to the grandkids of children just being born, this is a very important issue. I will be at every protest between now and the election because I don’t want us to cause another 100,000 deaths in Iran even if Karl Rove thinks it is the best way to get help the Republicans steal the 2006 election. And I will be at every protest to try and reduce carbon dioxide to which I can possible take public transportation. I will continue to write letters to editors and have my senators on my speed dial and do every possible thing I can to make this country a little less toxic. In an ideal world, I’d love to find someone that would go with me to the protests, but at the very least, I need someone who will respect it. This is the basis of my sense of self, of my integrity, of my optimism and of my drive to get up in the morning. This is a deeply moral issue to me, in a way that nothing of wiitwd (except minors and animals) comes anywhere close and there is no possible way I would trade my integrity and my sense of self and helping the even for great sex (and I doubt I’d have great sex with someone I don’t respect). If someone approached me with respect and conversation, I might have a different response, but quote Fox News and wearing a t-shirt with Mohhamad on it is not an opening to dialogue or respect. Maybe it is shallow. But everyone has lots of things that are shallow. I fail to see why this is more shallow than height, skin color, cup size, or weight. (and Level—I was sorry to see Galbraith died--sad but would that we all had his life! Fortunately his son is still writing dynamite stuff and we have Paul Krugman. There was a nice article I sent out on my mailing list by him at http://www.commondreams.org/views04/0715-06.htm)

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