RE: Allowences from the submissive

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RE: Allowences from the submissive - 6/22/2008 8:06:15 PM

OnlyMels

Posts: 115
Joined: 2/27/2008
Status: offline

Hello I am 22 and I used to allow him access untill he tried to use it as punishment and from then on it is off limits. He lost my trust for that aspect and I don't know if he will ever get it back.

_____________________________

Low riders are for little boys who can't get it up.

Saw it, wanted it, threw a fit, Got It!!

Want to get laid? Crawl up a chicken's ass and wait!

(in reply to genvieve)

Post #: 41

RE: Allowences from the submissive - 6/22/2008 8:19:55 PM

YourhandMyAss

Posts: 5516
Joined: 6/25/2006
From: Sacramento
Status: offline

WEll my dom and I have been together for 2 years, and we had sex the very first time I met him. Which was my idea not his and totaly unexpected since I originally had very ridig boundries of first dates are NOT for sex or bdsm. For me I believe in having sex once enter a relationship with the said person. In the past anal sex has been a hard limit after a lady turned my first experince into something painful and unappitizing with a dildo, However I would allow my Daddy dom to attempt to do me anally yes. I'm quite curious about it despite of my bad first experince, and I have offered that "gift" if you will to the very first rt dom I had, but he was a bit of a git an kept saying not now or later and it never happend. I'm 25 and he's 36. I do feel that knowing him for a long time does influence my descion to try something peviously taboo, since I trust him to be sensitive to my needs.

However, if when I was single a dom just charged in all bull in china shop like, and demanded it was his right to fuck me in the ass or do anything he liked to my body, then I'd tell him where the door was, and don't let it ram ya in the ass on the way out.

quote:

ORIGINAL: genvieve

Ok, my Dominant and i have been having this discussion for some time now, and i was curious as to the response. This question is mainly for the submissives, but i would be interested to see Dominant responses as well.

submissives: you have been involved with a Dominant long enough that you are to the point of vaginal intercorse with He or She. Do you also allow the Dominant anal access?

Also, for the purpose of this question, i would like to know Y/your age groups, if you don't mind. i'd really like to know if the time-period from which you've grown will make a difference in your answers.

Thanks so much!

-genvieve

< Message edited by YourhandMyAss -- 6/22/2008 8:21:09 PM >

(in reply to genvieve)

Post #: 42

RE: Allowences from the submissive - 6/22/2008 8:45:44 PM

Missokyst

Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline

Heck... the way it is presented (by several) it seems like giving over anal is a chore. Anal can be fun! It can be intense. It can be painful. But it is not submission for me. It is sex. It is sensation. It isn't something I would equate with giving in to, it is something that just adds to an already hot situation.

(in reply to genvieve)

Post #: 43

RE: Allowences from the submissive - 6/23/2008 1:22:38 AM

Wolfie648

Posts: 600
Joined: 9/14/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: genvieve

Ok, my Dominant and i have been having this discussion for some time now, and i was curious as to the response. This question is mainly for the submissives, but i would be interested to see Dominant responses as well.

what about the people that aren't dom or sub? did u think about them? Just sort of popped into my head.

quote:

submissives: you have been involved with a Dominant long enough that you are to the point of vaginal intercorse with He or She. Do you also allow the Dominant anal access?

mm not sub so no input. Well I do but...well nm.

quote:

Also, for the purpose of this question, i would like to know Y/your age groups, if you don't mind. i'd really like to know if the time-period from which you've grown will make a difference in your answers.

well for you doctorate paper I'd just like to say I'm 99/androgenous/live on mars.

quote:

Thanks so much!

smoochies baby.

_____________________________

Possibly.

(in reply to genvieve)

Post #: 44

RE: Allowences from the submissive - 6/23/2008 6:03:10 AM

VioletAshes

Posts: 101
Joined: 1/16/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: genvieve

submissives: you have been involved with a Dominant long enough that you are to the point of vaginal intercorse with He or She. Do you also allow the Dominant anal access?

Yes we engage in vaginal intercourse & I allow anal access. This was something we had discussed at length before we began as I need quite a bit of 'prep' before I am ready for anal though I am learning to use Subspace to my advantage. Aftercare from my partner really helps.

quote:

ORIGINAL: genvieve
Also, for the purpose of this question, i would like to know Y/your age groups, if you don't mind.

I am 28 and my partner/Dom is 40. We engaged in a long friendship and growing period (3 years) before we decided we were ready to have intercourse - this period of exploration which we call 'non sex' has been integral in the growth of our relationship because it has built deep trust and understanding.

_____________________________

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I'm not like other girls that you know
but I believe I'm worth coming home to"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(in reply to genvieve)

Post #: 45

RE: Allowences from the submissive - 6/23/2008 6:28:57 AM

cuffncollar

Posts: 73
Joined: 1/21/2008
Status: offline

Upon playing with the dominant for the very first time......I personally would prefer that he took the time to explore my body and reactions rather than have anal sex, some play would be fine though.. I'm 46.

(in reply to genvieve)

Post #: 46

RE: Allowences from the submissive - 6/23/2008 7:49:31 AM

tsatske

Posts: 2037
Joined: 3/9/2007
From: Louisville, KY
Status: offline

sex of any kind - well, vaginal or anal sex, and recieving oral, are hard limits for me when i am unowned. I was always clear that i would happily engage in all types of sexual activities while owned - i am a slut, no doubt. but i prefer that with casual partners, and during negotations up to ownership, the concentration be elsewhere.
Owned - He has access to anything he wants. He made anal off limits while I was pregnant. I threatened to ask the doc, and he simply said, 'the doctor does not give me orders' (which he certainly frigging does. anytime the doctors give me order i don't like, i immedeatly recive orders from Master to obey.) I love it, because it hurts - but i love everything, with him. But i do not do it until I am owned. I am 40, Master is 47.

_____________________________

“If you never did you should. These things are fun and fun is good”
~Dr. Seuss quote

(in reply to genvieve)

Post #: 47

RE: Allowences from the submissive - 6/23/2008 7:54:33 AM

tsatske

Posts: 2037
Joined: 3/9/2007
From: Louisville, KY
Status: offline

Mels,
I find it interesting the way you put that. I know that some use it as punishment (I enjoy it a bit too much for that...). I can see that that might cause something to become offlimits. I can even see the 'lost my trust' aspect, but i don't know that i would still be with someone that i felt that was an adequate descriptor of. How has that impacted your D/s dynamic, since to me that is something that takes a LOT of trust? have you been able to seperate it and basicly say, 'well, i don't trust him about THIS, but everything else is good...'

_____________________________

“If you never did you should. These things are fun and fun is good”
~Dr. Seuss quote

(in reply to tsatske)

Post #: 48

RE: Allowences from the submissive - 6/23/2008 8:03:36 AM

TwoNYCDommes

Posts: 237
Joined: 1/14/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: genvieve
i am not speaking about a M/s relationship... i'm speaking of a first time, no strings attatched sexual scene. Is it right of the Dominant to demand every hole that He or She wants?

In a first no-strings scene, or at the beginning of a relationship, we expect subs to have limits and will respect them. Some may include anal penetration on their limits list, like anything else; many do not.

(in reply to genvieve)

Post #: 49

RE: Allowences from the submissive - 6/23/2008 8:08:03 AM

Lynnxz

Posts: 4813
Joined: 10/3/2006
From: Atlanta
Status: offline

Weee.. old thread.

Anyway- my "limits" are pretty simple. No sex-at all- and I don't have a particular interest in "I own you bitch" kinds of relationships, so I don't feel pressured to submit to it anyway. I'm 21, he is 29

_____________________________

HBIC

(in reply to TwoNYCDommes)

Post #: 50

RE: Allowences from the submissive - 6/23/2008 8:30:21 AM

softness

Posts: 2918
Joined: 8/1/2006
From: Leeds, UK
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: genvieve

Ok, my Dominant and i have been having this discussion for some time now, and i was curious as to the response. This question is mainly for the submissives, but i would be interested to see Dominant responses as well.

submissives: you have been involved with a Dominant long enough that you are to the point of vaginal intercorse with He or She. Do you also allow the Dominant anal access?

Also, for the purpose of this question, i would like to know Y/your age groups, if you don't mind. i'd really like to know if the time-period from which you've grown will make a difference in your answers.

Thanks so much!

-genvieve

yes I do allow my Dominant access .. but only when He is good, and respects the precious gift that I give Him.

I'm 24, He is 49 .. so really He should be grateful

_____________________________

proudly wearing the blue collar of consideration to DK Leather, Leatherdykeuk, and LeatherEagle of the UK KRueL Leather Family

veritas, respectus honorque in corio

(in reply to genvieve)

Post #: 51

RE: Allowences from the submissive - 6/23/2008 8:36:26 AM

sweetnurseBBW

Posts: 2464
Joined: 1/26/2006
From: North Carolina
Status: offline

I am 35 and when I agreed to be his I agreed to him having say and use over my parts.

_____________________________

Sir Pain's pain slut

(in reply to genvieve)

Post #: 52

RE: Allowences from the submissive - 6/23/2008 9:02:46 AM

xbutterflyx

Posts: 51
Joined: 7/18/2006
Status: offline

37 here and not a pro..He is going very slowly in my training ..It never has been a limit ..but something i need help with..lotsa help..giggles.

~smile bunches~

(in reply to genvieve)

Post #: 53

RE: Allowences from the submissive - 6/24/2008 4:41:41 PM

daddysprop247

Posts: 1712
Joined: 6/24/2005
From: DC Metro area
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: genvieve

Ok...this is my fault. i apperantly need to revise the question. And thank you all for your responses...however varried, they are quite the elightenment.

i use the word allow because it is my believe that we as submissives allow the Dominant access to us. It is easy to say that they have access to everything and anything...but what about polotics? Does the Dominant have the right to tell you how to vote? Or is that different all together.

So... i would like to modify the question.

Will you, upon playing with the Dominant for the very first time (assuming that vaginal sex is allowed) also allow anal sex? Be honest. And i appreciate the giving of age groups...this helps a lot.

if we are talking about a first time encounter, obviously with someone who does not own me, i have no commitment to, etc. (because i would not be committed to someone i had never met, don't do the online thing)...then my answer would be that the Dominant would do with me whatever he pleased, or rather, whatever he persisted in doing. i am submissive by personality/temperament, not so much choice, and have an EXTREMELY difficult time refusing someone something they want of me, especially so if the person is a man. so if i were meeting a Dominant or any man for the very first time and they wanted to have anal sex with me, then more than likely they would have anal sex with me. but would it be something i would desire? no, as i'm not crazy about anal sex, and if i have my preference i'd wish to do it with someone i knew well and trusted.

and i am 27, an owned slave since 19.

(in reply to genvieve)

Post #: 54

RE: Allowences from the submissive - 6/24/2008 6:08:55 PM

goodpet

Posts: 458
Joined: 6/8/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: genvieve

.... It is easy to say that they have access to everything and anything...but what about polotics? Does the Dominant have the right to tell you how to vote? Or is that different all together. ....

Well that depends on the contract or agreement made between the two. For us he can make those decision if he decided to. I picked a Master, a partner, who I trusted would be logical about things, and he has been. Before you make contract with that much power exchange I would suggest you know your partner well. Choose wisely.

Would I vote the way he wanted me to, as long as it did not cross my limits, yes. And we do not think the same politically. We are different parties and have many different political views in national, local, and even in the BDSM group votes. Based on my contract and my agreement with Sir he has the right and I would obey him.

(in reply to genvieve)

Post #: 55

RE: Allowences from the submissive - 6/24/2008 6:28:25 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

53. Anal requires a certain comfort with scat. He doesn't want it badly enough to deal with the mess. Additionally, it's a moot point unless I get a hemorrhoid or two removed.

But I don't see sex as gradual. Oral, anal, vaginal - they're all sex to me and equal. I need to see std scans, use protection or be fluid bonded. As long as the parties involved are both interested, then it's good to go.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to genvieve)

Post #: 56

RE: Allowences from the submissive - 6/24/2008 6:47:23 PM

summersprite

Posts: 101
Joined: 4/3/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: softness

quote:

ORIGINAL: genvieve

Ok, my Dominant and i have been having this discussion for some time now, and i was curious as to the response. This question is mainly for the submissives, but i would be interested to see Dominant responses as well.

submissives: you have been involved with a Dominant long enough that you are to the point of vaginal intercorse with He or She. Do you also allow the Dominant anal access?

Also, for the purpose of this question, i would like to know Y/your age groups, if you don't mind. i'd really like to know if the time-period from which you've grown will make a difference in your answers.

Thanks so much!

-genvieve

yes I do allow my Dominant access .. but only when He is good, and respects the precious gift that I give Him.

I'm 24, He is 49 .. so really He should be grateful

Wow, softness, if I was that cheeky I'd have my arse whipped next time I saw my Sir - lol.

The first time I met my Sir I guess it was a 'no strings attached' scene. Neither of us knew whether it would progress any further and for my part it was an experiement as to whether I liked BDSM as I'd never tried anything real-time ever. We did negotiate in advance what access He had to my body and I said He could have me orally, vaginally and anally .... which in hindsight was rather brave as I'd only ever had anal sex once before and that was 20 years earlier and it had hurt like hell! However, He was patient and kind and damn persistent.... and I loved everything we did. Now I'm most definitely his 'anal slut' and He takes me that way everytime.... sometimes more than once which is another story altogether ;-)

Edited to add I'm 42 ;-)

(in reply to softness)

Post #: 57

RE: Allowences from the submissive - 6/24/2008 11:01:55 PM

graceadieu

Posts: 1518
Joined: 3/20/2008
From: Maryland
Status: offline

I'm willing to let them try! I can take and often enjoy a bit of anal play, but my body has a much harder time with actual anal sex.

(in reply to summersprite)

Post #: 58

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