Still learning to submit

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

Still learning to submit

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Introductions] >> Introduce yourself >> Still learning to submit

Page: [1]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

Still learning to submit - 1/16/2011 8:17:47 AM

tonkababy

Posts: 8
Joined: 7/19/2010
Status: offline

Hello,

I am a newly collared, well about 5 months now, slave. I live with my Master and it is a 24/7 choice for us. A little background on me. I am 38, I have two children who don't know about the lifestyle. They live with their dad. I work in the medical field. I am a military brat spent time in the Navy myself. As with most subs I have met I was abused as a child. It is part of who I am or ahould I say who I became, I am not ashamed of it. I am bipolar which of course lends it own share of challenges to the relationship.

I can be mouthy and have mastered the Glare, which does not serve me well in this position. I am head strong, the women were the strong ones in my childhood. So for me to submit it is sometimes a struggle. I struggle with always putting him first and accepting his judgement as law. It isn't that I don't trust him. It is just I keep comparing him to past relationships (none of which were BDSM relationships) and how things went wrong or how they hurt me. I know it isn't fair to hold the past against him especiall when it isn't his fault it isn't the past he did. Does that make sense?

Anyway so my Master is actually my first love from high school. We found each other again as adults. He has always had a strong personality and tendencies. I knew this going in. Anyway it took me 18 months to decide I would move if he would be my master. We had talked and we saw each other before this. He was the first guy I willing wanted to give my self to in high school and the only one I would be willing to submit to on a 24/7 basis. So why do I struggle?

Anyway that is a little about me and us I guess and I am just looking for advice and words of encouragement to help me be the best I can be in serving him and making him happy because of course when he is happy I am happy

Profile

Post #: 1

RE: Still learning to submit - 1/16/2011 8:31:55 AM

poise

Posts: 9509
Joined: 7/3/2010
Status: offline

Welcome to the forums! Enjoy!

_____________________________

When the path ignites a soul, there’s no remaining in place.

(in reply to tonkababy)

Profile

Post #: 2

RE: Still learning to submit - 1/17/2011 5:38:57 AM

OohAahMrs

Posts: 7723
Joined: 7/14/2010
Status: offline

Welcome to CM

_____________________________

You may choc the choc.........Oh forget it......

(in reply to tonkababy)

Profile

Post #: 3

RE: Still learning to submit - 1/17/2011 9:53:17 AM

CherryNeko

Posts: 330
Joined: 12/29/2010
From: Mexico City
Status: offline

Hey tonkababy! Welcome!

_____________________________

How many mornings do we have
Before this night ends?
I'm dying surrounded by white flowers
Which scatter in the sky...

(in reply to tonkababy)

Profile

Post #: 4

RE: Still learning to submit - 1/17/2011 2:15:57 PM

tiggerspoohbear

Posts: 19141
Joined: 6/27/2010
Status: offline

to the boards. Please don't assume that most subs were abused in their childhood. Not unless it can be backed up with certainty, and not just your knowledge. There's absolutely no abuse in my past and I'm as submissive as most come, close to the point of being a slave. And no, there's nothing wrong with that, I'm just saying that's who and what *I* am.

Painting everyone with the same brush is something that you'll find out doesn't go over well here. Just a bit of advice. Good luck in your journey.

_____________________________

"RABBIT IS GOOD, RABBIT IS WISE".

"I'm a baaa-aaad pussycat".

(in reply to CherryNeko)

Profile

Post #: 5

RE: Still learning to submit - 1/17/2011 5:30:45 PM

kalikshama

Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline

I'm going to interpret your question as rhetorical and just say Welcome!

(in reply to tonkababy)

Profile

Post #: 6

RE: Still learning to submit - 1/17/2011 5:36:37 PM

BurntKitty

Posts: 3340
Joined: 9/7/2010
From: Here To Eternity.
Status: offline

welcome to CM from another non abused submissive.

_____________________________

Cat Quotes

Count Boogie's Foot Fetish Anti Creepy Training video

(in reply to kalikshama)

Profile

Post #: 7

RE: Still learning to submit - 1/17/2011 5:37:27 PM

FukinTroll

Posts: 6277
Joined: 2/6/2007
From: Under a bridge
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: BurntKitty

welcome to CM from another non abused submissive.

Although the night is young.

_____________________________

I'm the guy your girl is thinking about when she is fucking you!

TrollTopia
Greedy Groupie!

The Mods have me on speed Spank!! Gotta luv'em.

(in reply to BurntKitty)

Profile

Post #: 8

RE: Still learning to submit - 1/17/2011 8:19:10 PM

kdsusa7894

Posts: 193
Joined: 12/19/2010
Status: offline

Welcome to CM and enjoy yourself.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val To Aqua- Thanks!
Seduce my mind and you can have my body, find my soul and I'm yours forever...

(in reply to FukinTroll)

Profile

Post #: 9

RE: Still learning to submit - 1/17/2011 10:40:55 PM

AmberEye

Posts: 1
Joined: 1/17/2011
Status: offline

I have some similar problems as well with always putting His needs first, as a recently collared sub as well. I've been with my Dom in the lifestyle for about 9 months now. I love that you mention the glare because I have what is called the "fuck you face". If you trust Him though, I've realized, that He really has your best interest at heart with His rules or expectations. I view my submission more as the best outlet to become a better person. I hope that what you learn as a sub will overflow into your vanilla life and you are happy with who you are at all times.

(in reply to tonkababy)

Profile

Post #: 10

RE: Still learning to submit - 1/18/2011 5:18:12 PM

tonkababy

Posts: 8
Joined: 7/19/2010
Status: offline

Thank you all for the words of welcome.

I didn't think I said ALL subs were abused, just the majority of the ones I have talked to were. I did not mean to offend or make excuses for being submissive.

And a special thanks to AmberEye because that is the attitude I am trying to hold onto.

(in reply to AmberEye)

Profile

Post #: 11

RE: Still learning to submit - 1/18/2011 11:39:51 PM

Mindykatz

Posts: 4
Joined: 4/13/2010
Status: offline

u will find esp females.. who were abused in past.. are more sub tham other way round.
and a lot of guys have who were have a control issue.. please note i have not said everyone.

(in reply to tonkababy)

Profile

Post #: 12